For Everything You Were
Say My Name
"Sorry dad, can you back up a moment. Are we talking about the same Colin here, Ethen's Dad?"
"I know, I can't get my head around it either."
"Like I sad to your father Jake, we don't know all the facts yet, so there is no point getting all worked up or inventing conspiracy theories until we know what's happened." Mum said, seeing I was concerned.
"But Alan, we all saw the guy, it's not like we never had contact with him right?" Cody added.
Dad shook his head. "Cody I worked with him for nearly a year, so I KNOW he existed."
This had to have something to do with the call I was going to get tomorrow evening. I desperately wanted to tell everyone after this conversation, but had to hold myself back from doing so. Something told me things were going to become a lot clearer when I found out what this letter meant.
"Have you checked out that base he used to go to at Arizona, I heard him mention he used to go there quite a bit?" I asked.
"It's all gone Jake, the whole database, all the files. Everything that Colin and I worked on has been deleted. As far as MI6 and MI5 are concerned, the man never existed."
"I know dad, you keep saying, but I can't accept that! He buried his son, my boyfriend… what about him, have you looked into Ethen's file? I mean he helped out up at that base, there must be some record of him there surely?"
"Hmm, well Ethen was never technically employed by the base or the government so there would be no reason for him to be on any records."
"Yeah but he must have been vetted at some point to even be there right?"
"Not necessarily, Jake. Because he was Colin's son that would have been good enough."
"Ok, so what about the other people at the base, they must know him… I mean you and him must have come into contact with other people there, can't you contact one of them?"
"I did," my dad said, swallowing hard.
"Jake… no one has ever heard of a Colin Jones, nor…" dad stopped and just stared at me.
"Nor what?" I asked, sternly. Dad squeezed the bridge of his nose.
"No one has ever heard of Ethen either," he replied, almost in a whisper.
"Impossible!" Cody blurted
"This just gets crazier by the minute," I stated, messing my hair up in irritation.
"Look, boys. I don't know how much more I can tell you because this is about all I know. I will try and see what else I can find out, but you need to learn that governments are very good at hiding things they don't want people to know about. People are expendable and most things are on a need to know basis in what I do. There is a possibility we will never know what's happened and if I refuse to let this drop it could have consequences."
"Like what?" mum asked, looking surprised.
"Well I could be let go if they think I am asking too many questions. Trevor will have no choice in that, no matter how good a friend he considers me."
"You could lose your job?" I asked, perplexed.
"It's possible, Jake, but look, just leave this with me ok, I will find a way of looking into this without rocking the boat too much, but I need to make clear again, you must discuss this with no one!"
"Yeah sure," I replied. Mum and Cody just nodded.
Back upstairs with our drinks Cody and I settled back on to the bed. Settled being a very loose word because neither of us felt that relaxed right now. The day was turning ever stranger and wondered if a fucking SWAT team were about to come through the window at any moment such was the frequency of bizarre happenings just lately.
"Stop thinking about it Jake," Cody said, seeing the faraway look on my face.
"What do you make of it all?" I asked.
"I don't know, but like your dad says, give him some time to look into this."
"You could contact Luke couldn't you, he will be able to vouch for what's happened?"
"And say what? You heard your dad, we are not allowed to talk about this. If we start doing shit like that who knows what trouble it could land us and him in."
I sighed. "You're right, I just hate all this not knowing crap."
"You and I both, but I have a bad feeling about this, you hear how people can just disappear when they know too much about something, what if that happens to us?"
"Oh Cody, you've been watching too many movies." I chuckled.
"Well your dad looks worried enough so I wouldn't dismiss it too much."
Cody and I had settled on some action flick to watch as the evening light started to fade. It was a stuffy night leading to both of us laying on top of the bed in just our boxers. Even with the windows wide open and a fan going it was proving to be a very uncomfortable night.
Cody seemed to be enjoying himself though, frequently pushing his hand below the waistband on my underwear and stroking the thick hair of my pubic region. Every now and again he would cup my balls in his hand and massage them in his fingers making my dick swell up. I though, not really being in the mood for sex, refused to take the bait. In fact, it was kinda cute watching him get all frustrated. I knew he wanted sex but I wasn't going to let on I knew.
"Aww, little Cody got a boner?" I teased, squeezing his organ through his boxers, making him groan in pleasure.
"Don't wind me up, I'm feeling pretty horny right now."
"No shit, and whose fault is it for getting in that state?"
"Yours, because you are so fucking sexy."
"Oh shush, watch the movie, it will take your mind off it, or go have a cold shower."
Cody groaned and buried his head in a pillow making me snigger. The thing with Cody was he was always so horny, like, all the time. I'm sure if he had his own way we would just stay in bed all day and night having sex. It was almost like an addiction that I had to ration him on.
"You know, you are getting worse," I commented. He lifted the pillow from his face and turned to face me.
"I resent that comment, I've always been like this," he teased.
"Nope, not so, never this bad. It seems like ever since you decided what hole you wanted to put your dick in you have been sexually awakened in a very intense way."
"Aww, C'mon, don't say you don't like it."
"I can't keep up with you sometimes, I may have to put you on pills if you carry on."
Cody burst out laughing and I tried to remain serious, but failed miserably. With Cody on his back I undid the two buttons on his boxers and pulled his dick out, balls and all.
"What are you doing?" he asked.
"Well I am not going to get any peace with you like a dog on heat, I'm gonna get rid of some of these hormones of yours and carry on watching the movie."
With that said I began to massage Cody's dick in my hand, gathering speed as I went. Within a few minutes I could see his balls rising up towards his stomach which was his tell-tale sign he was close. Then, at the right moment, I placed my hand over his mouth and watched as he yelped into it. His hips shot up from the mattress and rope after rope of his seed came rushing from his cock. Most of it hit his neck as he lay there with his head tilted back and his eyes tightly closed.
A 'Cody orgasm' was always a very loud and animated orgasm, hence the hand over the mouth system we had. Something I had long since leaned to master, seeing as mum and dad were usually in the next room when he had sex. Cody, when lost in his moment, seemed to always forget that.
As he came down I got off the bed and threw him a towel letting him commence clean-up operations.
"Better?" I asked, smiling at him.
His face looked dreamy and I knew the answer. "Yeah, I needed that."
"I'd have never of guessed."
"Want me to do you?"
"Nah, I'm fine, I haven't really been in the mood the last few days."
"Yeah, I guess I know why."
"Don't worry Cody, I'll be fine soon, it's just been a rough few days and sex hasn't been on my mind. I know how important it is to you."
"What do mean by that?"
"Not how it probably sounded, I'm sorry. I just mean… well it is isn't it? I'm not saying it's a bad thing Cody."
"I just don't want you to think that that's all our relationship is based on, it's not how you feel is it?"
"Cody please don't make this out to be more than it is, it was just a comment that's all. I'm not asking you to change or anything… I happen to like you the way you are."
"Its fine, I'm just worried about… I mean, I do worry about us sometimes."
"Well don't! Things are fine."
"So, uh… how have things been today, I mean really?"
"You mean Ethen?"
"Yeah, looks like you had a pretty up and down day."
"That's just what it was. It seemed to get better as the day went on, you know. Mind you, I have had a lot to take my mind of it."
"I used to think grief was something that you held inside and slowly dealt with as days went by, slowly diluting the poison from your body, but I realise it's nothing like that at all. It's a state of mind that comes with loss. The scary thing is Cody, I don't think you ever get away from it… the memories stop that. As long as you have the memories you'll always have the grief."
"I can't begin to understand what you went and are going through, but I do get what you are saying. I might not understand the feelings you are processing but I get the rationale behind them."
"I know we are a couple Cody, but he was… he was just a beautiful person. Its upsetting to think he never saw any of the world, became wise and lived a full life. For someone like him who was so FULL of life it was such a waste how he went."
"I know, he was a good person, and you forget, in the end we had a pretty good relationship. After working up on the base with him I found that out. Just a shame it was a little too late. He loved you though."
"You really think?"
"I know Jake, just from the way he talked about you. I think you were something he was searching for his whole life."
"Thanks for being so understanding Cody, I know this must be hard for you, and I know it might look like I am with you but thinking about Ethen all the time but really, it's not-"
"Jake, really, you don't have to explain, I get it." Cody said cutting me off. "So shall we get back to this movie?"
"What movie, it's finished," I laughed.
Seven eighteen, twenty first of July my clock said as I slowly opened my eyes. I'd had a crap night's sleep with the heat and felt altogether unrested. Actually the heat was just the catalyst for waking me up… it was the damn letter that kept me awake.
Turning over onto my back I stared at the ceiling wondering how I was going to get out of the house today to get this phone. I could say I was going to visit Kit, but he had always been more Cody's friend than mine. Besides that would never work because if Kit caught up with Cody and they talked, well, yeah that would never work.
After much deliberation I was just going to say I wanted to go for a walk on my own to clear my head. After yesterday I doubted that would raise much suspicion. The only question now was – when?
Feeling I needed an evacuation I slid out of bed careful not to wake Cody and patted to the toilet where I met mum on the landing.
"You look like you've had about as much sleep as me Jake, hot night eh?"
"Yeah hot night and a stupid brain that wouldn't quit." She tilted her head sideways and held out her arms to me. I went towards her and we hugged.
"Want a cuppa?"
"If you're making, how is dad?"
"Oh you know your father, he was out like a light, and nothing stops that."
"No, I guess not."
"I'll meet you downstairs, you looked like you were on your way to the toilet anyway."
"Cool mum, see you soon."
Mum walked down while I headed to the bathroom and closed the door. I sat down on the toilet and let a much needed log fall from my ass, before promptly wiping and turning on the shower. Determined to wake up I let the thing run cold to see if I could bare it.
"Huuuurrr," I groaned, the shock of the cold water hitting my sunburnt shoulders making the water feel even cooler. I let my head drop and just stood there for a few minutes not bothering to wash. Right now I just needed to come alive inside.
I clicked open the Imperial Leather shower gel bottle and squirted some on my hand before going to work on my sweaty groin area. Using my pubes to lather up some bubbles I used the rest to do my pits that were not smelling that pretty after a night sweating on bed. Finishing as I always did with my ass crack then hair I turned off the water and stepped out shivering with my next destination being the toothbrush.
As I was cleaning my teeth I heard a knock at the door. "Jake, are you done in there yet?"
"Two minutes dad," I called through the closed door. I quickly rinsed my mouth out and wrapped a towel round my waist to hide my modesty before walking out with my dirty underwear in my hand.
"Sorry to push you Jake, I just got to get ready for work."
"S'ok dad, I'm not normally up this early, just had a shit night's sleep."
"Yeah it was hot."
"Not that you'd notice, mum said," I grinned, letting him pass.
I walked into the bedroom where Cody was just stirring and sat on the bed. "Hmm, you smell nice."
"Yeah just hopped in the shower, I was all clammy with sweat. On the subject of smells, I suggest you get in there after dad."
Cody smelt his armpits and nodded. "Wonder why people our age need to wash so much, it's totally annoying."
"Yeah," I replied, "But I've always found a little bit of muskiness on you quite hot."
"Well I won't shower then."
"I said a little!"
I pulled out a clean pair of boxers from our drawer before selecting a fresh t-shirt and shorts to wear.
"Fuck I love your legs, I never get bored of them," Cody announced licking his lips suggestively.
"Want me to shave them?"
"Don't you fucking dare, that would be grounds for divorce, I love my little wolf."
"Get up, don't waste the day."
"Sure I can't interest you in a little muskiness?"
"You got it yesterday, don't be greedy… oh and strip those sheets, I'm not sleeping in that stale sweat again. I'll see you downstairs."
Mum was out in the garden sipping on her tea as I got down. She was wearing her dressing robe which said she was having a lazy day as she always had whenever she didn't get dressed straight away.
"You tea is on the side."
"Jake?" she called just as I was bout to turn round.
"What do we do first thing when we get up?"
I rolled my eyes. "Sugers?"
"Got it in one… and I want to see the reading today."
"God, it's like being in playschool again."
"When you learn to take this seriously I will trust you a little more, now go and get your kit and bring it out here."
I did as she asked and came back through with my pack and tea clutched in both hands. "I need some more insulin soon, I'm running low."
"I have already ordered you some, I'm picking it up Friday." She said as I pricked my finger and let the drop collect on to the reader. The machine beeped and she took it from me. "Seven point six?"
I shrugged. "Dawn effect?"
"That's no dawn effect, not that high. What did you eat last night?"
"Nothing, just dinner and-"
"I had a few cookies before sleep with some milk."
"Grrr, Jake, get that level down now. Go have some bran flakes and then take your insulin straight away. Cookies are now off limits!"
She gave the machine back to me and I left again for the kitchen looking like some scolded child. Cody met me in the kitchen and got some orange juice from the fridge.
"You ok babe?"
"Just mum being… an ass!"
Cody laughed before heading out to the yard with me on his tail with my bran flakes.
"You… you should know better Cody!"
"Letting Jake have cookies… you're his partner, you should be watching what he eats and stopping him when he does."
"But he said you said it was… OUCH!" Cody cried as I kicked him under the table.
"Oh, so this is how it's going to be is it Jake, lying to your boyfriend?"
"Jake?" Cody said, glaring at me. "Were you not supposed to have that packet of biscuits?"
"PACKET?" mum cried. "Right, that's it young man, seventeen or not, you want to act like a child with your diabetes then you will be treated like one. I want to see every reading you take and all junk food is going in the bin as soon as I get back in the house. Crisps, cookies, sweets and fizzy drinks, it's all going."
"Nice one Cody!" I scowled.
"Hey, I'm not the one who lied and then didn't have the brains to tell me you did. How can I cover for you when I don't know anything?" Cody said finding this rather amusing.
"Never mind, if it's all going in the bin it means you have lost out too," I declared giving him a false smile, and clapping. That wiped the smile of HIS face.
"And don't sulk, you knew this was coming if you didn't take this seriously."
"Yeah and living like a food prisoner is great aint it, I might as well be dead."
"Well carry on eating the crap you do you might get your wish."
It was the chance I needed so I went for it. "I'm going for a walk to clear my head and calm down, I'll be back soon."
"Want some company?" Cody asked, which I knew he would.
"No, just need some time on my own, don't worry Cody, I'll be fine."
"Oh, ok then, if you like."
"See you guys soon."
I grabbed a set of keys from the hook before running upstairs to get my passport for ID, narrowly stopping dad from seeing what I was doing as he came into our room.
"I'm off now Jake, See you tonight." He announced as I pretended to pick the dirty sheets up from the floor.
"Y-y-yeah dad, have a good day yeah?"
"I'll try son."
I breathed out slowly as he left, trying to settle hitch in my nerves before heading down the stairs and making a run for it before dad saw me and asked where I was going. I slowed my pace as I got to the end of the street and stopped for a breather, finding a bench to sit on.
I headed into King Street, not even thinking about the time before realising I still had ten minutes before Whizz Phones opened. I reached into my pocket and also found I didn't have the piece of paper with me either which filled me with dread as I tried to remember if I was going to need it or not. I finally came to the conclusion I didn't as I tried to memorise the words contain within it.
Crossing the street I found a bench to sit on while I waited like some hit man for a bank to open, keeping a keen eye on the lone staff member staring to get the shop ready.
"C'mon," I muttered as he seemed to be taking his time opening the door. I looked at my watch again, sniggering as I still had five minutes to wait. Nerves were now starting to build again as the full force of what I was about to get dawned on me. This all important phone connected to a mysterious letter sent from Colorado.
What the fuck did it all mean?
Finally I saw the door to the phone shop open and I rushed back across the road, dodging cars before making it to the other side and into the shop.
Soft music played as I waited at the counter for the young man to come and greet me. He was quite a looker as well I noted eyeing his modern hair style and cute blue eyes. I loved Blondes!
"Good Morning Sir, can I help you?"
"Uh, I hope so, I'm here to collect a phone."
"What's the name, Sir?"
"Let me check our records, one moment." The man went to his computer and started tapping away while I waited and looked around the shop with my eyes. "Yes, I have a Samsung phone here for collection under that name. There is a passcode word connected to it. I need that and a form of Photographic ID before I can release it to you."
"Oh, erm… damn the word, ok let me think." I could have kicked myself as I forgot the damn word until suddenly it came to me. "Spectrum, yeah… the word is Spectrum."
"Thank you Sir, and your ID please?" I handed the man my passport and he looked at the picture. "One moment, I need to check this against the e-mail we received."
"Just curious, but does the e-mail say who this is from?"
"You don't know?"
"No, is that strange?"
"Well I can't say we get many orders in with this level of security attached to them, especially with the type of phone you are taking."
"What do you mean?"
"Well let's just say it's not the latest iPhone," the man giggled lightly. "Anyway, in answer to your question, all I have on file is the e-mail name of Coloradoguy6612. Ring any bells?"
I shook my head. "Nope."
"Hmm, well I guess someone wanted to make sure no one got their hands on this phone but you. So, I have checked your ID and I am happy to give this over to you. It looks like your mystery person has also paid in full for it as well."
"Give me a minute Sir and I will collect it for you from the back stores."
I waited around until he came back out with a plain brown box. "Thanks," I said as he passed it over to me.
"Will there be anything else?"
"No… no, I don't think so." With that I left the shop and headed for home, now wondering how I was going to get this through the house without anyone seeing. Just then I had an idea. Seeing as I was not going to need the packaging I stopped beside a litter bin and started to tear in to the box. Inside the brown packaging a glossy box was revealed with the words Samsung on it. The picture on the front revealed this was a very basic style hone with limited features, but then again why wouldn't it be? I mused.
Chucking the brown cardboard into the waiting bin I started to undo the box containing the phone. I was half expecting to find another note inside but then realised it was not as if the person who sent it rushed over to the UK to place a fucking note in the box.
Inside was the phone, a new sim card and a charger. While discarding the rest of the packaging I clicked the back from the phone, took out the battery and placed in the sim card before putting the whole thing back together and pressing the on button. The phone buzzed into life and the screen showed I had forty percent battery left. It then connected to a UK network which happened to be Vodafone. I tried to even think if that was a clue, but what difference would the phone network make to who it was from, this person, whoever it was had just clearly gone for the cheapest phone they could find.
Just then the phone buzzed and a pending text message came through freaking me out. I clicked on the message button and looked at the screen seeing immediately that the text had been sent two days ago. I opened the message and held my breath.
If you are reading
This I see you have
The phone, thank you
For trusting me, I know
You have no reason to.
Please make sure you
are available and alone
at 7pm your time when
I call. Please do not worry
Jake this will all become
Clear and know that I am
As nervous as you probably
are. Take care.
This person was correct, damn right I was nervous. I shoved the phone into my pocket and started my walk back towards home again trying to calm myself down before heading back into the house.
As I reached the front door to my house I decided to switch the phone back off, scared that it might go off for some reason. That of course was interrupted by a very worried looking Cody who was suddenly in front of me at the door.
"Everything ok?" I asked him innocently.
"I don't know you tell me."
"Wha… what d'ya mean?"
"Your mum doesn't know, but I want to," was his response. I swallowed hard and walked in, going straight upstairs. "Where are you going?"
"To our room," I replied turning back to him.
"We need to talk."
"Like, where you have just been."
"I've just been for a walk Cody, I didn't go anywhere in particular, and what's with the interrogation?"
"I followed you, you know, I was worried. I followed you and know you visited a phone shop, wanna tell me about it?
"What's so weird about that?"
"Nothing is weird about that until you leave out the fact you went there, that's when it becomes weird."
"So I went to the phone shop, big deal."
"It helps if you take your phone with you I thought?"
"I was just browsing."
"Your contract has over a year left, like mine, what were you browsing for, a second phone?"
"This is ridiculous Cody, why are you being like this?"
"Because you are hiding something and when it's from me I think I am allowed to get a little suspicious aren't I?"
"I'm not hiding anything from you!" I said, getting irritated. I went and slumped on the bed and lay down, Cody followed, sitting on the edge.
"Why did you go to the phone shop then?"
"I told you, I was just looking."
"Looking for what?"
"Ok, let me make it clear to you. I was hoping you would just tell me what was in the box you came out with, but seeing as you have absolutely no respect for me, and worse still, feel you need to hide things from me then I'll drop the subject. But I know you are lying to me so please just do the decent thing and tell me what the hell is going on."
"I didn't want you involved… I didn't want anyone involved ok."
Cody reeled his head back and screwed his face up. "Involved… involved in what?"
I sighed and went to the closet. "Someone has sent me this letter," I said pulling it down the top. "They ordered a phone for me to collect and I am getting a call tonight on it."
"What the hell are you talking about, why the fuck would someone do that… let me read that." Cody snatched the letter from my hand and opened it up, his eyes beginning to grow wider as he read.
"What do you think?"
"What do I think? I think you need to dump this letter and that phone in the bin, this is fucking creepy Jake."
"I know it is but I feel like I need to know."
"Know what? What is there you need to know?"
"Fuck, I dunno, like who its from, why they need to speak to me, how they found me, I mean, wouldn't you be the least bit curious?"
"I'd call the fucking police, that's what I would do."
"The Police?! Don't be silly, its just a letter and a phone, its not like there is a bomb attached to it."
"Jake let me put it this way, if someone needed to speak to you what's wrong with the good old fashion practise of just getting in contact and saying who they are, like normal people?"
"I know, I know, don't jump on my case. Look, this is why I didn't want you to know."
"I know you've made up your mind to take this call, just be careful ok?"
"A very mature statement Cody."
"I'm serious Jake… and I wanna be there."
"No! This is something I want to do alone."
"Explain that to me?"
"I cant, I just need you to trust me ok, and mum and dad must not know about this."
"Tru… trust you? You just outright lied to me Jake, how can I trust you?"
"I lied to you because I wanted to protect you, not for any other reason."
"You don't need to protect me, we are a couple, your demons are my demons."
I blew air threw my lips and placed my hands on Cody's shoulders. "Babe, I love you with all my heart, I would never do anything to hurt you or deceive you but please, please let me do this on my own."
"I just don't understand Jake."
"Strange as it sounds, nor do I, but whatever this phone call is about I don't want anyone else involved."
"Even me, your boyfriend?"
"I'm not happy about this, but what choice do I have… fine, but where are you going to take this call?"
"I thought about the park at the end of the street."
"Fine but I want you to take your phone as well and the first sign of anything fucked up I wanna know about it."
"You have my word, and please, don't mention any of what you know to mum and dad, they would put an end to this straight away if they knew."
"Something tells me that's what I should be doing but I'm guessing you would not forgive me if I did, so whatever, I just hope you know what you're doing Jake."
Dinner was not put on the table until quarter past six and I was struggling to get it all down, knowing I had to be out of the door soon to take this call. Cody was doing his best not to act worried as he eyed me chucking down fork after fork knowing as well as I did how badly I needed to get out of the house.
"Jake, slow down, Jesus, anyone would think I starve you." Mum said, slapping my wrist.
"Sorry, I promised… Kit, that I would run some homework over to him, he's due to go out at seven."
"Still, if you carry on like that you'll be walking to his with indigestion."
Cody looked at me, tilting his head and mouthed the name Kit, I just shrugged.
"So how was work Alan," Cody asked, changing the subject.
"Work, as in what I do? Or are you asking if I have found out any more about Colin Jones?"
"Both I guess."
"Work was fine, and no I haven't. I've decided to leave it a while and let the dust settle as it were. No point in stoking the fire on this. I have a few tricks I can use to dig up some stuff, but that requires calling in some old favours from people I don't see that often."
"Sounds very mysterious," mum remarked, pouring some more gravy onto her chicken.
With my plate now virtually empty I decided I really needed to get going. Despite protests from mum about finishing every morsel, I convinced her I was full and left the table.
"I'll be back soon then," I announced grabbing my keys.
"Are you not going Cody, I thought Kit was one of your best friends?" Mum asked, I wished she haddent.
"Uh, well… no, I-"
"Cody said he's pretty tired mum, he's gonna stay here," I finished for him as he was getting nowhere.
"Yeah, pretty tired," repeated Cody, glaring at me.
"Ok then, bye."
I got to the bottom of our street about twenty to seven. At the entrance to the park gates I pulled out the basic small phone and switched it on. Pushing through the spring gates that were covered in ivy I went in and headed for the nearest bench.
Although it was the height of summer only a couple of people remained in the park. I could see a young couple together with their son and daughter playing over by the swings, and a man walking his rather large German Shepard dog along the perimeter. It was peaceful, warm and bright as an evening breeze whistled through the old metal fence just behind me.
I sat with the phone nestled between my knees and waited for the all-important call. I felt nervous and fidgety, having to take an unusual amount of deep breaths as I sat patiently waiting. Minutes ticked by so slowly and I found myself constantly pulling my own phone out to check the time.
As it got to seven o'clock my heart rate started to increase, my eyes fixed on the small grey screen. Still silent, the phone didn't do anything. One minute past, still nothing. "What the hell, is this some kind of cruel joke?" I muttered.
It was now five past seven and I was about to give up hope when it happened. The phone buzzed and a primitive ring tone rang out. Now, all that waiting and I couldn't bring myself to answer it. I just stared at the screen like it was toxic.
The only thing that gave me enough courage to press the green button was the fear that any moment now it was going to stop ringing and my moment might be lost.
I swallowed hard. "H-h-hel… uh, hello?
"Hello Jake," came a very coarse and deep voice
"W-w-who is this?"
"I will tell you in a moment, but first I need to make sure its you."
"Ok," I replied, softly.
"What were the name of the two girls that lived near you when you was in America?"
"Holly and Kim."
"What was the name of Luke's cousin who was at a party you went to?"
"Hey, how do you know about that?"
"Please, just answer the question."
"It was Benny, ok?" I heard the voice sigh down the phone.
"Ok Jake, just to let you know I am using a voice synthesiser and now I am going to remove it. Just please, don't freak out or hang up ok?"
"Ok now I'm scared."
"Don't be… ok are you ready?"
"No, but carry on."
I heaved as I heard that voice. I felt sick and struggled to keep the phone at my ear as I wanted to throw it across the grass. "NO! Nooooo! This is just cruel, who the fuck are you."
"Jake, please don't freak out, there is so much you need to know and…"
"This is a scam, a fucking cruel scam… I'm gonna hang up now."
"WAIT!! Please just… just wait!"
"Who are you… please don't do this to me, just tell me who you are and why you are doing this?"
"Say my name Jake, you know who it is, say my name," he pleaded as we both started to cry.
"I…I… I cant, because its not real!"
"Jake, please baby, say my name."
With barely a whisper allowing itself to escape my mouth and struggling through the sobs, I said it.
"Yeah… yeah baby, its me." He replied, in floods of tears.
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