Hand Me Down
by Evan Carlton
I announced my new relationship status over breakfast the following morning. Charlie and Michael stared at me for a long time and then said simultaneously.
I rolled my eyes but I had been expecting it, so I decided to let them have their moment.
"Let's do it together. Sandra and you, Connor and me." They agreed.
That evening we sat nervously in the living room while Sandra and my dads ran through their list of demands, which were actually sort of reasonable. In the end we agreed to concentrate on our school work, not drink, not take drugs, not get lured into performing any sex acts on the internet and wear condoms if we ever wanted to do the 'bottom thing'. For a nurse, Sandra could apparently be quite coy about sex. If we behaved maturely, we could sleep over at each other's houses, but only at the weekend. I stared at Connor, wondering if he had even considered the idea of waking up to my smiling face in the morning, He didn't look too comfortable with the whole conversation, but in the end we gave our solemn oaths to be what amounted to little gay angels. We retreated to my room.
-that was as bad as I expected
-your mum is being very cool about it
-I think she really likes you and she's just getting used to the idea of it. Mums of deaf kids are very protective. I just can't believe she got to touch your stiffy before I did
-I try not to think about that
-it could have gone worse. They could have said we had stop seeing each other
-you're right. That would have been bad.
-so do you want to sleep over on Friday?
-yes. Stop laughing
-it just sounds so weird. Like little kids
-not so little
-you can talk. That thing is not getting anywhere near my virgin bum.
-can we just cuddle for now?
-I like cuddling
As the weekend approached, I noticed Connor was getting more and more subdued. He came to ours most evenings after school and we played PS4 and cooked together, but his signs were muted and I often had to repeat mine to get his attention. In the end I asked him what was wrong.
-it's a bit stupid. I'm just nervous about tomorrow
-why? You're here all the time anyway
-it just seems like we have to have a plan. A sex plan.
-what do you mean?
-I have no idea what I'm doing
-you think I do?
-it's like I'm only coming here to have sex. Are we supposed to set a time when we begin and a time when we stop? We've already been hanging out for months with no plan, and suddenly we need one.
-do you want to wait a bit longer?
-no I just want it to be more relaxed. If we decide not to, I don't want to have a fight or feel bad because I wasn't ready. And I'm really not ready for the 'bottom thing'
-neither am I, and you're right by the way. I've been getting nervous as well. I keep wondering if you are supposed to start things off or I am. And what do we start with? How do I know what to do next? Do we sign? It suddenly got complicated, and we've never been like that
-so what do you want to do?
-I want you to come over and then we can maybe just let the evening happen. I love it when you are just there, just being you. We're fifteen. I still sleep in Star Wars pyjamas. I didn't want us to turn into a married couple straight away. We can just hang out and learn at the same time can't we?
-that sounds perfect. But I still want lots of kissing.
-that was always going to happen
"Connor and I have decided to take it slowly," I announced over breakfast. "It started getting weird."
Charlie stared at me, curiosity in his eyes.
"Anything I can help you with?"
"Not really. We just want to be teenagers for a bit longer. We want to be friends who are boyfriends, if you see what I mean." Charlie laughed in relief.
"You two are so mature about being immature. It's amazing that you worked it out on your own."
"What do you mean?"
"Gay relationships are always difficult at the start because you have to find out so much about your partner before it really clicks in bed. The first time is always a mess, with lots of 'sorry' and 'oops' involved. I think straight people have a slight advantage because it's usually understood what goes where and the rest is mostly just fine-tuning."
"So how did Michael and you find out what you both like?"
"Trial and error, mostly."
"That's what we're afraid of. The error part."
"Sorry Ben, it just goes with the territory. But you guys know each other really well, so there will be a lot of trust there. Just ask lots of questions. 'Do you like that?' is a real good one. 'Could you please do that some more?' really helps as well."
"What's your favourite thing that Michael does?" I asked shyly.
"Well that's hard to say. He's a great kisser. And he likes to explore a lot, and I like to be explored so that works."
"What about the bottom thing? Connor says he's not ready. I said I wasn't either, but I think I might be soon."
"A lot of gay couples don't even do that, so you certainly shouldn't pressure him. It's not for everyone. It can be quite painful if you're not ready, and it's never good if one guy is just doing it to make the other happy. It's also not easy to be spontaneous. That can get quite messy." My eyes must have gone quite wide, because he quickly tried to reassure me. "It's just better to know when you're going to do it and make sure the gun isn't loaded, if you see what I mean."
"Oh God, what am I getting myself into?" I moaned.
"The course of true love never did run smooth, Ben"
"Wasn't Shakespeare gay?"
"We like to think so. He was certainly in touch with his feminine side."
We actually managed to have a normal evening, which was a huge relief. Sandra came over and we all ate together and watched TV like normal human beings, Connor resting his head on her lap and signing questions when he couldn't follow the dialogue. There were small, harmless flares of awkwardness, breaks in the conversation where you could tell our parents were all wondering if this was a huge mistake, but we did our best to reassure them by acting as normal as possible. Finally we retreated to my room and I closed the door behind us. We heard voices in the hallway and then the front door opening and closing as Sandra left. Connor looked at me, and smiled nervously. We chatted for a few more minutes, until we eventually ran out of things to say. I stood up and stared at him, and then we were both standing and both staring, wondering who would make the first move. We burst out laughing at the strangeness of it all and, as the laughter died down, it seemed the right time to kiss. I saw the understanding in his eyes. There was no plan, no timetable, no set rules for what we wanted to do. Our instincts were taking over and we both knew it. The first mystery of sex had been revealed to us. I broke the delicious kiss and stared at the door.
-do you think they're panicking down there?
-probably. Are you panicking in here?
-no I just want to get into bed and cuddle with you. Is that okay? Don't get undressed yet.
-I like this. I wasn't sure who was supposed to get naked first. How's your shoulder?
-pretty sore. I don't think you'll have too much room tonight. I have to sleep flat on my back.
-it's okay I've slept on your floor before.
-I already put the mattress down in case it gets uncomfortable.
-I have a surprise for you
-sounds lovely. Surprise me
-take my hoodie off
-you're so lazy. Sit up a bit so I don't hurt you. Is that your rugby shirt? Wait a minute…
-now my sweatpants
-please let this be what I think it is…oh my god you're wearing them. I can't believe it.
-now take them off. Slowly.
-this is the sexiest thing I've ever done in my life.
He undid the waistband of my muddy rugby shorts and slowly started to slide them down, a look of intense concentration on his face. He grinned up at me as my cock leapt into view, straining against the material of my boxer briefs. I slipped my good arm out of the sleeve of my rugby shirt and he carefully pulled it over my head and down my bad arm. I winced as the pain flared, and he stopped immediately, concern written all over his face.
-should we stop?
-are you crazy? Just keep taking it slowly. And take your shirt off.
He eagerly stripped to his waist and my breath caught in my throat as I took in his muscular chest. The last traces of puppy fat had disappeared during winter and now he looked like an athlete. A strong V-shape disappeared into the waistband of his jeans. I looked at it hungrily, beckoning him to lie next to me. His skin was hot and smooth against mine. He kissed me again, his hand toying with my rugby shorts, diving inside, moving further down to stroke my thigh. I shuddered. The back of his hand touched my balls lightly and I tensed with pleasure. I remembered Charlie's words and told him he could do that some more. He smiled and began to kiss my chest as his hand cupped my balls gently, his thumb rubbing at the base of my cock. I gasped as I felt my foreskin retract and the sensitive head came into contact with the material of my boxers. I moved his hand up to the waistband and he understood it was time to set me free. Still kissing my chest, I saw his hand go to his own jeans and start to work them down over his hips. He was wearing Bonds briefs. I knew him well enough to know that he had bought them especially for tonight. A small wet spot had appeared where the tip of his cock was straining at the material.
My shorts were down below my knees now. I kicked them off completely as his hand moved up to my boxers and then his mouth was moving down my chest and I felt rather than saw my cock spring free and slap back against my stomach. I moaned in relief. He sat up and straddled my thighs. I looked down and him staring hungrily down at my cock while his still strained against his Bonds, the wet spot now an inch across. I looked at him pleadingly and he skinned them off in one smooth motion, settling back down onto me. His bum was warm and smooth against the skin of my thighs. He began to explore me, taking his time, running his hand gently up and down the ridges and veins of my cock. He gently pulled the foreskin back again and stared intently at the slick red head. He was mapping me, discovering my secrets, and he was taking his time. I stared at the thickness of his cock as it twitched with excitement. A thin line of sticky liquid hung suspended between the tip of his cock and my balls. I knew I had to taste that liquid.
I beckoned for him to slide up towards me and he looked at my shoulder, a question in his eyes. I pointed at the second pillow and he propped it up behind me, raising my head to the level of his cock. I began to caress it; peeling back his foreskin and staring up at him as I swiped my thumb across the. I popped my thumb into my mouth, sighing as I tasted the salty intensity of him. He slid higher up my chest. I reached my good hand around and cupped his bum, pulling him towards me. When his cock reached my lips I opened my mouth and took him into me, my tongue swirling around the head as I tasted more of his wonderful wetness. He tipped his head back as his cock jerked wildly in my mouth, and I heard a sound like a rattle escaping his lips. I managed to get about half of his cock into my mouth. When I felt myself start to gag, I let him slide out of me and wrapped my left hand around the base of his cock, my right hand moving to his balls and then tracing the thin line that led back and away from his scrotum. I pulled his cock back into my mouth, working it with my hand and my tongue at the same time. I was surprised when I felt hairs around his bum. I was completely smooth there. I let a finger trace gently over the pucker of his hole and felt him tense and stop moving in my mouth. I moved my hand back to his balls, making a mental note to be careful when close to the danger zone in future. He relaxed and began to slide his cock gently in and out of my mouth, my left hand stopping him from going far enough in to cause me to gag. I felt his hand reaching for my cock behind him, and then he was stroking me as his hips began to buck faster. With a massive shudder, he began to cum into my mouth. The thin, clear liquid had just been an appetiser. The main course was a flood of rich salty cum. I swallowed as he shot three times into my mouth. As the third jet left him, I came all over my belly, between his fingers, into the palm of his hand. He slumped forwards, his hand against the wall, his chest heaving. I tasted the last drops of cum as they oozed out of his cock onto my tongue.
He slid down to lie next to me on the bed, his eyes wide with wonder.
-please tell me you liked that as much as I did
-it was better than I ever imagined. It was unbelievable
-how did you know how to do that?
-I just wanted it so much that I found a way
-are you sure you haven't done it before?
-of course I signed, knowing a white lie was better than the truth. There would plenty of time to tell him that his wasn't the first cock I had had in my mouth. His was the only one that mattered now .
-did I hurt your shoulder?
-not at all. Did I make a mess on you?
-yes. What should we do? We can't keep showering all night
I produced a hand towel I'd concealed under the bed and watched as he wiped his hand and then my stomach.
-you came a lot
-I can't control how much I come.
-I know. Did mine taste good?
-I don't think good or bad is the right way to describe it. It tastes exciting. Unique. I've never tasted anything like it. It's you and that's what makes it good. Not the taste.
-maybe you should find out for yourself
-yes. Give me a minute to catch my breath.
We lay for a few minutes, caressing each other's chests, stomachs, signing single-handedly. Nice, warm, smooth, beautiful. The NZSL dictionary of intimacy.
-you have a hairy bum
-sorry is that bad
-no I was just surprised. You didn't like it when I touched you there
-I did! I just thought you were going to put your finger in and I got nervous.
-I won't do anything like that without asking. But just so you know, I think I'd like it if you did that to me. If you want to, I mean.
-What, all the way in? what if I hurt you?
-maybe just a bit at first. It's clean, I promise. I snuck out while you were watching TV. Stop laughing.
-sorry it's just all new to me.
-how do you know you'll like it
-you just swallowed my stuff. I think we're done with embarrassing.
-I tried it on myself. In the shower. I knew you'd laugh.
-everyone does that. I tried it too last year. It didn't do much for me
-well I liked it
-don't get upset
-I'm not. Want to play PS4 while we wait?
He got up and walked around the room, stretching like an athlete warming up. I stared at his nakedness, drinking him in. He was more developed than me, his body almost like a man's. His chest was defined, his legs muscular with a fine coating of dark hair. His pubic hair was thick and dark and reached right around his cock to his ball sack. I stared down at myself and shivered as I saw my boyish flat chest, my skinny bare legs, my tiny patch of light brown hair perched above my cock in a sad little tuft. I felt the urge to cover myself up. I looked up and met his eyes.
-You're beautiful, he signed
-ME? You turned into a Greek god without me even noticing it. I look like a stick of spaghetti with a penis.
-you're perfect. I'll miss it when you get all hairy and strong. Right now you look like a tender young virgin waiting to be ravished on his wedding night
-so ravish me, Greek god
He sat down on the end of the bed, staring at my cock. It was rock hard again and glued to my stomach. He got on all fours and began to inch his way towards me, his tongue flicking over my shins, my knees, OH GOD MY THIGHS. I gasped as his tongue danced along the inside of my thighs, grabbing hold of his hair to make him stop, then giving in to my fate, releasing him to continue his journey. He knew he had found treasure and he tortured me by dragging his tongue down my thighs towards my knees again, away from my twitching cock. Then he reversed again and began the slow, steady ascent towards my balls. My stomach was bucking off the mattress like I was being electrocuted. It was all I could do not to shout out as I felt his tongue finally reach the delicate spot just under my balls. He pushed my knees up and began to let his tongue drift towards my hole, all the while caressing my thighs with both hands. I whimpered as he stopped just short of my hole and then moved his mouth back in one smooth motion to the base of my cock. I closed my eyes as he his fingernails traced the line between my balls and my bum over and over again. I felt his tongue begin to work its way up the shaft of my cock and I opened my eyes to watch. He let his mouth drift over the underside of my shaft. I felt the light pressure of a finger on my hole and I quickly mimed that he should put it in his mouth first.
He put his finger in his mouth, then I felt a hint of pressure as he rubbed my pucker in a slow circular motion. I hissed as the tip of his finger entered me briefly, then slipped out again. I shuddered as I felt it return, slipping inside me again, teasing me almost to insanity. And then my cock was in his mouth, the warmth and wetness indescribable. I did cry out then, unable to stop myself. His finger was inside me up to the first knuckle, testing the resistance of my sphincter. It didn't hurt, but I knew that my body was trying to expel him, pushing against his finger when all I really wanted was to feel more of him inside me. I gasped as his mouth bobbed up and down on my cock, amazed that he seemed to be able to take almost all of me into his mouth when I had struggled to accommodate more than half of his. I gave into pleasure as I felt his finger slip further inside me, up to the second knuckle. As the sensation became more and more pleasurable, my body stopped trying to expel him and instead welcomed him into me. My muscles relaxed and a deep pleasure began to radiate outwards from my hole. He arranged himself so that he could kiss my mouth while his finger continued to send electric shocks of pleasure through me, then he turned to take my cock back into his mouth, positioning himself so that I could suck him at the same time.
I swallowed him hungrily, and the different angle allowed me to take three quarters of him into me. We sucked each other hungrily until I felt my muscles begin to contract and I started to cum. My cock popped out of his mouth and I felt his finger slide out of me as he set to work wanking my spurting cock hard and fast. He pulled his cock out of my mouth and, letting go of mine, wanked himself to a juddering orgasm. I looked down to see his cum mingling with mine on my belly.
-didn't you like the taste?
-it wasn't what I was expecting. And I wanted to see it. I love watching it come out of you. Always so much.
-I didn't know it was THAT much
-it is. I love it.
-we can cuddle until we get sleepy
-yes that's nice - do you think they heard us?
-no I was quiet
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