Discovering Love

Written by Rick Beck

Chapter 10

The Doug Affect

Several thin rays of sunlight came through the two partially raised slats in the window blinds, left out of place by someone looking out, as the morning sunshine broke through the row of poplar trees that stood in a row on this side of the house. My eyes burned wearily from too little sleep as the events of the evening before came back to me in waves the rose and fell.

The jockstrap I'd used for mop up and then placed on my lap when I sat back in the chair had disappeared. My hand was all that I had left to check the still raised enthusiasm that seemed to have taken on a life of its own now that it had been exposed to the possibilities I had found in boys. I'd carefully guarded enough clothing to hide my anxious lust but now I they were scattered all over a strangers house. The light didn't shine on me and so the early morning shadows were still enough to mask my urges from the prying eyes of others. I'd get up and find my pants as soon as everyone was asleep.

"What's your brother up to today, Boo Boo?"

"Herbie, he's twelve. My old man gets wind of this shit, your ass is grass," Timmy said as my eyes adjusted to the slim light in the room. Someone had cut off the television and any easy viewing of what they were doing was dimly lit.

"I just asked," Herbie complained. "What about his friend, Todd."

"Herbie! You're going to get my ass in trouble. They're too young for you."

"Maybe you're too young for me, Boo Boo," Herbie said with an evil twist in his words.

"Don't say that. You know how I feel about you."

"I forgot. Why don't you prove it to me."

"Don't you ever sleep."

"Not with you around, Boo Boo. I can sleep in school all week long."

As my eyes were adjusting, I could see that Timmy and Herbie were lying up against each other. Doug's head was down by my feet at the opposite corner from the other two. He'd curled up into a tight ball under the sheet.

Timmy was still wearing his shirt but he was naked below his waist. I could see the smooth crack of his ass with one of his legs bent up over Herbie's thighs. I thought I could almost see his hole. His hand was on Herbie's stomach as there was the impression he was somehow subservient to the bigger and older boy.

Herbie lay melancholy on his back with his hands behind his head as his long hot prick stand straight up from his small grouping of dark black pubes. His head was turned and his eyes were obviously on the young boy. "Feel me," he ordered with a deep unfamiliar voice.

The stomach hand slid down until it was massaging the solid pole. The fingers looked inadequate as they slid up from the bottom to the top and then back to the bottom in easy motions. Timmy's face turned downward as he watched his handwork.

"Damn it's so big," he admired. "It's got to be the longest one ever."

"You like it."


"You can kiss it if you really like it."

"Yeah," Timmy said moving his face to the stiff cock. I could hear his lips lavishing love on the joystick he was maneuvering in his fist.

"George is across the hall," Herbie said. "I know how you feel about George. He's got a fat one."

"Is he? His isn't as fat as Greg's," Timmy said seeming intrigued.

"Drunk as a skunk and wearing only his underpants, but we can remedy that quick enough."

"You want to?" Timmy said, sounding evil in his own right.

"He's all alone, Boo Boo."

"How do you know all that shit?"

"I keep track of my boys. You can chow down on that fat prick of his if you like. While I... like last time."

"You're making it up, right? I thought he left."

"He's the only one that will sleep in mommy and daddies bed. We could go keep him company, Boo Boo. He never wakes up."

"What if he does?"

"He won't. We might stop if he woke up. Georgie doesn't want it to stop."

"Okay!" Timmy said and in a flurry of activity they both passed my chair.

The room went silent. I couldn't see any of Doug, except the top of his blond head. His hair was nondescript in the near dark of the new day. I drifted back to sleep on thoughts of how free I had become at fifteen. The last night was the most freedom I'd ever known.

When I woke up the second time, the angle of the sun's rays caused them to be filtered by the sheer white drapes that covered most of the window. One streak of yellow light shined across my stomach, down across my rich brown cock hair, connecting me to Doug's upturned face as it ran across his cheek before disappearing on the bed. The golden tone of his skin was magnificent in the growing early light.

The sheet now only covered him from the waist down to the upper portion of his thighs. His chest was light tan and his nipples were light with a touch of pink that kept them from being brown. His stomach was flat and smooth and a shade or two lighter than his shoulders and more brown arms. The sheet stood up with very little angle as I noticed the delicate skin between his thighs, almost pink on white with just a hint of tan coloring.

I wasn't much aware of myself at that moment, but it was difficult to pretend I wasn't there when I found Doug's warm blue eyes trained on mine.

"You can lay down if you want. They won't be back."

"Oh!" I said, wondering if he'd caught my probing eyes.

"Nah, Herbie will go upstairs to torment my brother. He has a thing for Greg. Don't say I said so. Timmy's probably gone already. He likes leaving before anyone gets up. He never likes the morning after, facing the guys."

"I like him," I said.

"Yeah, so does Herbie, and Greg, and even his friend Tommy likes him when he's letting him fuck his ass. Mostly they treat him like shit after he's gotten them off a couple of times."

"You don't like him?"

"Timmy, yeah, he's my best friend besides Kent."

"Kent who? Kent Herbie."

"What's that?"

"Kent is to Herbert what Gregory is to moi. His brother."

"Where's he?"

"Avoiding Greg. They hate each other."


"I'm not sure. Something happened when I wasn't around. Greg doesn't mention it and I can't get Kent to talk about it. We were all thick as thieves until Greg said not to ask him over any more."

"Oh! Is Kent like Herbie?" I inquired.

"Worse than Herbie. He's handsome. Mostly does girls nowadays."

"Mostly but not always?"

"Don't get any ideas. He hardly ever comes around for that any more."

"But he did come around for that?"

"I fall asleep in that chair watching television. After a few hours it's like the rack, you know. You may as well lie down while you can. There'll be people coming and going all day long. Party City, you know."

I stood up before I realized my protrusion was protruding only a few inches from his face. I could lose myself in Doug that easy. I was naked as a Jaybird and I'd forgotten all about it until my dick was swinging in the breeze. In a flourish of motion I hid myself with a corner of the sheet he wasn't using right then, as he carefully studied each of my moves with amazement. I felt like such a dufus sometimes.

"What happen to all that gear?" Doug asked casually.

"Ah, maybe that got uncomfortable?"

"Me too," he said, lifting the sheet to reveal to me his erection in the small patch of golden pubic hair and above his low hanging balls. "I put my underwear on once but that never lasts long around here if you go to sleep."

"Yeah," I said, yawning and feeling faint from being so close to him.

"You can have some of the sheet. I mean more than just to cover it up."

Doug rolled over and placed his back to me after handing me half of the sheet. I couldn't resist holding it up long enough for me to view his round bottom and well-chiseled crack. If Doug weren't a real boy, he would have been a Greek Statue. I nervously lay on my back and left a foot between us. My part of the sheet poked straight into the air. I wondered if his was poking anything.

The room was fully lit by daylight when my eyes opened again. There was the warm and pleasant feeling that came on me. Doug's body was up close to mine. The heat from him was incredibly intense. I could feel my heart doing a tap dance in my chest as I tried to immediately survey all the places where he touched me, and who was on whose side of the bed was all that I worried about.

We were both on our sides and his face was up against my chest. His hands were crossed and folded on his chest which meat they were folded on my stomach. My still raging erection was poked into his stomach and his erection was pressed into my thigh. I had to catch my breath as I tried to calculate how not to disturb this intimacy. I just lay there panting like a fool.

Finally I let my left arm move down across his shoulder and onto his back. I used my right arm to complain the embrace and squeezed him closely to my body. It was heaven. Suddenly, my cock burst forth with its surprise symphony and my body heaved without control as I tried to stop my orgasm. As I held him in my arms his eyes opened sleepily and melted into mine.


"Oh fuck," he said, as surprise took hold of him. "You want to get a towel? That is yours, please tell me that."

"What?" I said in my best stupid reply of the year. "Yeah, I'm afraid so. Sorry! I don't know what happened. It just went off."

"Next to the bathroom. Closet. Towel!" Doug's face was still on my chest and leaving him wasn't what I wanted to do.

I was forced to let him go as I panted from the experience of loving him.

What must he think? Why was I such an idiot? Fuck!

I had no trouble finding the linen closet and I raced back to clean my cum up off his stomach and lower parts. When I got to his dick I hesitantly wiped around it and watched as he kept his eyes closed. Shit, I'd already shot a load all over him, I thought. What the hell, I seized his cock in my hand and wiped vigorously as I took in each detail I could observe.

"You better quit if you don't want another mess. That's hot. You got good hands."

"Sorry," I said. "I mean, I didn't intend to. Fuck!"

"Shut up, Martin. I never said I didn't like it. Quit saying 'I'm sorry', Jesus!"


"Lay back down. Put the towel on the floor," he instructed.

Doug hadn't so much as moved an inch from when I first woke up. I put the towel on the floor and found my jock by the arm of the sofa when I did.

"How'd my jock get all the way over here. I had it on my lap," I said.

"Herbie," Doug said.


"He has a thing for underwear. He can't resist other guys stuff. He's harmless, but he's plenty weird. You'll have to get used to it if you are going to hang around me."

"Why do you let him do that to you?" I asked, unable to stop the words once they got going.

"What?" Doug said with alarm as his eyes blinked wide open and pierced into mine.

"I saw him. He like climbed on your ass. Doesn't it hurt," I said. "God he's so big."

"Look, I told him stop. He stopped. Nothing hurt. Nothing happened, okay."

"Yeah, but his dick's like a foot long," I said. "It's got to hurt, Doug."

"Martin, nothing happened."

"But I saw...."

"Nothing, okay. Shut up. You talk too much."

Doug rolled over and turned his back on me, wrapping up in the sheet. I wasn't sure what to do. I lay there on my back and remembered what I'd seen Herbie doing to Doug and then Timmy. I remembered what I had done to George and then to Doug, and I cringed. I was so sick. What was wrong with me? I watched him sleep wondering how I could be hard again, or was it still. God I hated wanting sex.

I woke up later in the day. I was in the television room by myself. I stayed where I was for awhile, listening to the house. There were voices in the front of the house and a door opened and closed. It sounded like the fridge. Someone laughed and then it was quiet again. I waited to see if anyone came into the hallway. After figuring it was safe, I jumped up and figured I'd make my way to the basement so I could get my clothes.

It was dark in the basement and I didn't turn on the light at the top of the stairs because I'd closed the door and couldn't find the switch. I remembered Greg using a string above the pool table and guided by the one window, I proceeded down the stairs. When I clicked it on and looked where I'd put my clothes, they were gone. All the clothes were gone. Did Greg think they were his now? I looked for a towel or something to cover my nudity. The best I could come up with were old newspapers and I wasn't going to go that route.

I turned off the light and started back up the steps, stopping to listen before going back into the hall to go get my soiled jockstrap. It was better than nothing, and that's all I had just then. When I was sure no one was there, I opened the door, closing it softly as I stepped into the hall, and I came face to face with Herbie, who was coming out of the bathroom at exactly the instant.

"Gee, Boo Boo, seeing a lot more of you these days. I knew something had to be in that underwear besides that flimsy little jockstrap you were holding."

"Ah, I was looking for my clothes," I said, trying to use my hands as fig leaves.

"Where'd you leave them, Boo Boo? That's where I'd look."

"Downstairs. They aren't there!"

"A man should always keep track of his britches when he's visiting someone's house. Me thinks this is a breach of proper etiquette, Boo Boo. Come on. We'll track 'em down for you."

"Thanks," I said, wishing he wasn't helping me.

"Not a problem. I was hoping to help you out this weekend."

"That's nice," I said, feeling a little like the fly who had just stumbled onto this really neat looking web.

I followed Herbie toward the front of the house. It was then that I noticed the red, green, and blue plaid boxer shorts that adorned his skinny ass. He walked oddly, something like a cartoon character might walk with his legs and arms going in all direction with no noticeable design to the motions, and I feared he might collide with one or both of the walls, but I couldn't be sure which one.

There was something else about Herbie, and it was the most disturbing thing I had noticed. The papers under the stairs where Greg and lord knows who else left their cum, Herbie smelled just like it did when I stood up under the stairs and breathed deep. He smelled like dried cum. My dick twitched and I cringed.

Don't! Please!

"Hey, who stole juniors clothes? He's just kinda... hangin out, until he can find them."

"Did he come with any," Greg said, eyeballing me around Herbie's arm. "Get your beauty sleep, Marty? I worked all night and I was up with the roosters."

I cringe hoping it was a mere oversight he'd called me that name. I took the high road. I gritting my teeth and smiled, trying not to let him know how much I hated the name Marty.

"Yeah, I guess," I said, smiling some more.

Greg sat at the table in his white briefs. In the middle of the table was a huge jar of mayonnaise with a knife stuck down in the middle of it. There was a loaf of bread, lunchmeat, cheese, pickles, olives, and half an onion lying around the mayonnaise jar. A huge bag of potato chips sat gapping near my host.

"Want a sandwich, Martin," Greg said. "You look hungry."

"Yeah," I said, realizing I hadn't eaten since the day before. The clock on the wall said it was eleven thirty. "My clothes?"

"First things first. You've got to keep your strength up if you want to hang with the big boys, Marty."

Once again I had the wild urge to scream for him never to call me by that name, but that would only assure he'd never call me by any other. A guy like Greg used any advantage against those he wished to torment. I wasn't going to give him any ammunition to use against me. No more than he already had anyway.

Greg stood and grabbed a little of this and a little of that and slapped it together until it resembled a sandwich. Just before he slapped the last slice of break on to top it all off, he grabbed a handful of potato chips and slapped them down on top, smashing them carefully and trapping them with the bread he placed on the top.

"Here go, squirt, a Gregor especial," he walked to where I stood and handed me the sandwich around Herbie's elbow.

"Thanks," I said, hearing the crunch as I bit through the layers. It was great and it occupied both of my hands, and the chips right on the sandwich was an idea I would use for the rest of my life.

"Want one, Herbie, while I'm making them?"

"Sure, Boo Boo," Herbie said, charging at the table.

My protection gone, Greg surveyed everything on me below his sandwich. I was hungry enough that I just accepted the inevitable scrutiny. I read nothing in his gaze and we stood there for a minute before he turned away from the naked boy standing in his hall gobbling his food.

"Boy's got bigger balls than I thought," Greg said, turning back to the table.

"Yeah, got a dick on him, too," Herbie said.

"I meant balls enough to be bareass when we aren't. I thought he was a tuti-fruity there for awhile. You're all right, Martin."

Greg sat back down and he glanced at me twice as I ate.

"Thanks. Can I have another," I said, whipping my face on my arm. I'd have used the tail of my shirt, but I was a bit short of shirttails right then.

"You get the first one made for you on account of because you're my guest. Now you're just one of the guys. Make your own fucking sandwich," Greg growled but then he smiled and there was that twinkle in his eye I hadn't seen since the first day I met him. When he smiled it made me feel like a million bucks and his eyes ate me while Herbie noticed whose eyes were where on whom.

"Hey, squirt," Greg screamed. "What'd you do with Marty's panties."

I cringed again but kept making my sandwich, grabbing a handful of potato chips and smashing them under the second slice of bread, glancing at him to see if he noticed me doing it his way. He smiled and shook his head and slapped me on my bare ass.

"In the TV room by where he was sleeping."

The voice came from just above our heads.

"Don't get no cock hair in the pickle juice, squirt," Greg said, looking at the way my cock just cleared the top of the table.

Herbie had a mouthful of sandwich, and believe me, Herbie could pack his mouth full, and suddenly it went out all over the table as he went into hysterics over Greg's comment.

"You asshole. Clean that fucking mess up," Greg growled without the smile.

I was half way through the sandwich when Doug came charging down the steep stairs, sounding like there was no possible way he could stop before colliding with the wall across from the door, but he did. He did a double take when he saw me standing at the table.

He turned toward the television room. "Come on, I ain't ah-dressin' ya," Doug said. "I put them right beside you so you wouldn't have to walk around like that. You can't encourage those two, Marty. You'll live to regret it you do."

My smile was filled with pain as I turned away from the table.

"I'll be right back," I said politely.

"Don't let your meat loaf, kid," Herbie said as he wiped up the mess he'd left in front of Greg. He pressed the front of his boxers hard against Greg's naked shoulder. Greg looked at the front of the boxers but made no effort to avoid the physical contact.

Doug looked back over his shoulder, letting his eyes watch me swinging in the breeze. When I remembered the feel of him against me, my resolve weakened as my pride and joy insisted on doing a slow rise.

Shit! When's it going to take a break, I wondered?

"You're getting bold," Doug said. "You're too nice to get with them."

"Not much choice. I didn't want you to find me in here starved to death."

"I found these upstairs just now -- by my bed. They look like the ones you had on. They're damp. You'd better rinse them out and just put on your jeans for now. You've been busy, huh."

"Yeah," I said, putting the sandwich on the arm of the chair while I was pulling on my jeans.

"You aren't going to say anything about what you saw last night. I mean that's between Herbie and me. That can't get out."

"What?" I said, acting as dumb as I could.

"You know, last night. What you said you saw him doing."

"I don't know what you're talking about. I didn't see anything last night. I was so drunk I don't remember anything from last night. Must have been someone else said they seen something."

"Kewl, dude," Doug said, looking at me a second time and giving me a small warm smile that had me giving off a little shiver.

"What happens today?"

"Can't ever tell. They'll start drinkin' before long. I'd keep my clothes on if I were you. Guys will come and go. Greg's got some girl coming and Herbie says his "girlfriend" said she might drop over."


"Hey, we're going up to the mountains next weekend. You want to go along? We always get to take someone," Doug said, looking me in the eye.

"Sure. I'd love to go with you."

"You'll love it. We can fish, swim, hike, anything you want. We'll leave right after school on Friday. The old man'll pick us up and all. We come back late Sunday night. You should ask your folks so they can call mine."

"They'll be okay with it, your mom and dad?"

"Sure. They'll like you."

"I'd like to go."

"I was going to say we should go up to the El Rancho for some burgers and fries, but I see you've already eaten."

"Just a couple of jumbo sandwiches. That's my warm up. Let's go."


I felt funny without my underwear on. I was afraid I'd rub a hole in my dick but after a few minutes it felt right good. We walked along the old highway for the mile it took to get to the local burger hangout. We sipped cokes and ate a double order of fries with cheese and chili thrown on top for good measure. We got two forks for the fries but we each had our own straw and own drink. Doug was incredibly happy to be with me and I couldn't hide my feelings for him.

When we walked up toward the bowling alley, Timmy was walking toward El Rancho. He stopped and watched as we came toward him. He suddenly seemed shy when he saw me.

"Hey, bud, what's up?" Doug asked.

"Hi Timmy," I said, remembering the way Herbie had been on top of him a few hours before and wanting to do the same thing for him the first chance I got.

"I was just going to get a burger. I can eat at the bowling alley if you don't mind me tagging along."

"Kewl," Doug said, "You mind if he comes along?"

"No," I said. "I was hoping he would. We really didn't get much of a chance to talk."

Timmy gave me a huge smile.

"Thanks," he said, looking right at me for longer than it took to see someone.

"Thanks for what?" I asked.

"For being cool. Some guys aren't, you know. I mean they find something out about a guy and they use it on 'em."

"Use what? You're a nice guy, and there aren't many," I said, wanting not to talk about it.

Timmy walked ahead of us kicking rocks and I immediately replaced Herbie with myself as I watched his jeans wiggling from the way his round ass filled them up. It felt funny with my wiener wagging around in my pants as it grew up against the rough material. I wondered what Timmy might say if I suggested we get our mutual interest together for a meeting of the minds,... or something. How do you make an appointment with a guy to screw him when you don't know him?

My mind wouldn't get off the idea of going all the way with someone that had more than five fingers to offer me.

"Hey, Timmy, you want to go to the mountains with us next weekend?"

"Sure, if my old man will buy it. Could you have your Pop to call him? He don't dare say no to a Colonel."

"Good as done. Martin's going. You mind if he goes too?"

"I was trying to figure a way to ask you if he could come," I said, catching Timmy's eyes back on me again. We smiled at each other like a couple of schoolgirls, while Doug shook his head like he couldn't believe us making eyes at each other right there on the highway.

"You two just remember my parents are going to be around. You've got to cool it round them, okay?"

Timmy turned around and walked backwards while looking at me. He didn't miss my little bulging problem that was eagerly wiggling around in my pants. He smiled like the early bird that just got himself a worm. He turned back around again and kicked some more rocks.

I felt like a billion bucks. I could see Doug, Timmy, and I snuggled up in our sleeping bags. It wasn't at all like thinking about Greg and what I might be able to get from him. This was more liking feeling we could do something together without the power trip.

I'd never felt that good about life before.

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