Recovered: An Unlikely Friendship
by Hunter Woods
Chapter 15: Recovered
The sleep I fell into was a satisfying one filled with all of those closest to me. One by one my sexual fantasies about each and every one of them began to evolve as our bodies intertwined and writhed around in sexual blissful release. Never before had my dreams been so sexually charged. Of course I dreamed now and again like any normal boy about sex, but this was different because it seemed so real and accurate depicting each one of my friends in their natural glory in precise details.
One by one I took them into my arms satisfying their sexual needs providing them with the relief they desperately craved. It began with Jake, then his brother Austin, before moving on to Paavo, the sexy blond blue eyed Estonian boy making me quiver excitedly even in my sleep. Each one in turn tried to seduce me into allowing them to bring me release as well, but each time I managed to hold them off as we squirmed and writhed around in our naughty sexually charged embrace. Then Jamie's image floated into my dreams the lithe beautiful boy of my affections looking glorious in all of his erected state. My hands were all over him as I got to know every square inch of his pale smooth body in intimate detail before giving him what he needed as well, watching him writhe in quiet ecstasy, his orgasm running its course through his petite body.
Then it was his turn, the boy gently running his hands up and down my body. It felt wonderful and I didn't even hesitate allowing him to have his way with me. I've never allowed anyone to touch me in this sort of intimate fashion, but with Jamie this somehow felt different. It was as if he was the one I've been waiting so long for, and it now finally felt right. I knew deep down inside that I was dreaming, but it all seemed so real. The interaction with Jake, Austin, and Paavo all felt natural and I could actually feel the heat of their hard assorted erections in my hands making it so life like. Now with Jamie, I could actually feel his fingers curling around my stiff tool, which has somehow recently managed to get bigger in the last several days without me even realizing it. Electricity shot through my body making me jolt and moan because I've never been touched in such a sexual manner before. When Jake and Austin had touched me, which seemed like ages ago now, it had felt intense, but not like this, not in the way I was being touched by my sweet boy. Another jolt of heat seemed to sear through my insides with me bolting upright into a sitting position instantly awake now realizing I was about to blow a nut.
My body crashed back on to the mattress with me wide awake now, but the intense feeling of my dream lingered on refusing to go away as I looked around completely disoriented feeling the cold sweat from my dreams running along my body making me shiver because the blanket covering me had been tossed aside. My chest heaved trying to gasp for air with the muscles along my stomach contracting a bit painfully as they rippled along my body. Gasping and heaving for air I looked down between my legs and momentarily stiffened because Jamie's small form was hunched over my nakedness. The sexy boy's small elegant fingers were wrapped around my rigid four inch spike which had turned into an obscenely purplish blue tinged coloration in an almost frightening kind of way.
"Nnnnnhhhh," I heard my own guttural voice with my body jolting due to the overwhelming sensation of having someone else's hands all over my sensitive pickle which was visibly twitching around while my testicles squirmed inside my satchel which sagged down heavily between my legs. I've never seen my balls hanging so low before, but neither had I ever felt the intensity of what was happening down there.
I've always held off on allowing anyone to touch me in such an intimate manner never feeling ready for it, but somehow this was different. Deep down I now knew it was because of Jamie that I've held off for so long. Now it was actually happening. Not in the way I imagined it, but I was already too far gone to do anything about it; my resolve completely dissolved from inside of me because it was something I desperately wanted and needed.
Seeing Jamie's fingers pumping up and down my hard pole, while his hard shaft bumped up against his stomach, was extremely sexy. Even his now slightly sagging satchel, which was squished up between his thighs stretching out the membrane of his skin revealing the outlines of his chestnut sized testicles, was visually overpowering. It made me yearn to reach out to him, and pleasure him like never before, but I simply couldn't move as my body quivered uncontrollably. All I could do at the moment was wrap my fingers around the sheets because something so powerful began to bubble up to the surface which felt more intense than ever before.
All of this went screaming through my mind within a second as the sweetest angelic voice entered my thoughts. "It's your turn now." I heard Jamie whispering before he yelped in surprise.
My body seized on me the breath catching in my throat. "Aaaaarph, uuuumph, uuuuuuumph, uuuumph, aaaaaaaaahhhhhh, oooomph." I moaned with my body arching upwards noticing how Jamie's eyes had become as big around as golf balls bugging outwards with his fingers wrapped up so tightly around my stiff tube which twitched around so radically it almost slipped from his grip.
Even my testicles jumped around inside of my bag which would have made me laugh at how outrageous it looked if it weren't for my body seizing up as the massive orgasm ripped through my insides. There was an intense burning sensation that somehow felt euphoric rushing through my four inch hose at the same time my body came crashing on to the mattress only to bounce back up into the air. My eyes were fixated on Jamie's fist that was wrapped around my purple blood engorged inflated glans when I gasped in surprise because the hole between my slit enlarged, and a small amount of clear liquid squirted out from the end of it. There wasn't a lot of it and the clear substance only managed to come screaming out past the tip end of my penis about half an inch before it splattered against Jamie's petite fingers. I watched in stunned amazement as my life giving seed oozed along the length of my shaft creating a small amount of wet sticky mess. My body continued to contort and writhe around the elation of me finally squirting adding to the passion of the rapture from my orgasm.
Jamie was still pounding around on my now extremely sensitive boy sprout forcing me to reach down and shove away his fingers as I clamped my own hands protectively over my privates while I rolled on my side curling up and moaning. "I'm so sorry Sammy…did I do it wrong?" He asked with a look of disappointment and worry on his features.
Gasping I tried to answer, but I was still out of breath feeling Jamie crawling up next to me and watching me closely while I sucked in some air before turning on to my back and releasing my protective hands from my now soft calmed down boy baubles. I ran my finger along the length of my softness feeling the slickness along it before lifting them in front of my face. I ran my thumb and fingers together feeling the slickness of my own baby batter with the unmistakable odor drifting into my nose. I hesitated a moment before shoving my finger into my mouth to see if mine tasted like Jamie's, and to my surprise it was pretty much the same. The substance was a bit slick on the tongue with a hint of salty tanginess, but also with a subtle indication of sweetness which seemed such a contradiction. It was something too indescribable, but didn't taste bad or anything, just different.
Glancing over at Jamie I saw him doing the same thing with his fingers, but his face was scrunched up making me realize this was the first time he had actually gotten a raw sample of boy jam. He had tasted his on my tongue, but this was probably more potent than what he had tried earlier. Not that my spunk was potent or anything, after all it was my first, and it looked fairly clear when it had came out of me, so if anything my cum was probably a bit tasteless all things considered. Jamie's face suddenly perked up though when the flavor of it exploded on his tongue making me smile.
"Well?" I asked getting a sly smile out of him.
"I like it, but it's from you so I would like it no matter what." He replied smiling before his grin faded into a frown.
"I'm sorry Sammy…I guess I did it wrong." He sighed biting his upper lip nervously while I frowned a bit puzzled.
"I don't understand."
"It's just that it happened so fast for you. I know it isn't supposed to happen that fast, and almost as soon as I touched you I made you orgasm. I know I did something wrong." He declared while I shook my head.
The boy's assertion reminded me just how naïve he still was with everything in life. He's never had this sort of experience since he's never jacked off before or anything. I'm sure he simply didn't know that at times guys sort of explode rather quickly depending on how worked up they were, and let's face it I was pretty charged up with what happened earlier with Jamie, my dream, and then my very first time being on an intimate level with someone else in regards to them pleasuring me.
"No Jamie…you didn't do anything wrong. It's just that it felt so wonderful, and I wasn't prepared for it is all. I mean…I've never felt anything so incredible, and you were the one who did that for me making it even more special. You just surprised me is all, and it simply felt too good for me to control. Besides you didn't know…I mean you've never jacked off before or anything, so it is kind of hard to know when doing something this special for others. It sort of takes practice before you can read someone else and know when to back off a little." I tried to explain seeing the look on his face.
It once more made me realize that despite how it seemed with him being normal now he was still far from it. There was this childlike innocence still inside of him in the way he interacted with others. Add to that the subtle nuances of sex and it could make for a very perplexing moment for the younger boy, more so than most other kids. Even though I had very little sexual experience I still had years of conversations, teasing, and even lessons in class regarding puberty to draw on, not to mention the media and internet. Basically life long lessons that I could fall back on to help fill in some of the gaps. Sighing I pulled Jamie closer to me snuggling up with him while I began to explain why he didn't do anything wrong. I tried to point out the difference with what I had done with him last night, and how I had managed to prolong the outcome. He listened carefully with his head on my chest while I ran my hands through his long hair enjoying how they felt tangling up along the length of my fingers.
"Do you feel better about it now?" I wondered after we had talked together for a bit trying to decipher his look and seeing the boy's face going through a range of emotions.
"I suppose, but I just wanted it to be as good like with Jake or Austin. I bet they do a better job for you." He added still feeling like he hadn't done a good enough job at pleasuring me.
"What…I...Jamie…I…you…uh…Jamie you do know that you are the first one who's ever…um…who I've ever let do that to me. You do understand this is something very private? I've never done something like this before…with anyone…ever. I mean you are the first boy who's ever touched me like this…you know…in a sexual way." I replied a bit surprised he'd think I might have done this already; although, I suppose there are enough boys out there who sort of mess around like that, but all things considered regarding Jamie's new awakening it sort of surprised me he would assume it for me.
"Not even Paavo?" He responded sounding surprised for himself.
"What! N…n…no." I added shaking my head stunned wondering how even Paavo was included in this conversation.
Jamie's never even met the other boy; except, for a few times on skype. With Paavo spending the night most weekends, or me having spent the night with him there's been a few times when Paavo and Jamie interacted a little on skype. They've never met in person though, so it sort of surprised me that the boy would assume that even Paavo had performed sexual favors on me.
"But…why not?" Came the hushed response, stunning me speechless for several moments before I began to sputter.
"W…what do you mean?" I finally managed to get out noticing the innocent look on his face like it had been a simple enough request on his part. It was almost like he was truly surprised that I wouldn't have let anyone, including Paavo, have sex with me. "I…Jamie you…um…you do understand something like this is a very private thing, and just doesn't happen?" I asked in genuine astonishment seeing the bewildered look on his features.
This really was going to be more complicated than I thought because Jamie actually didn't understand just how private a matter this was, making me begin to panic. What if he said something to Aunt Harriet or Uncle Walt? I'm sure they wouldn't really mind all that much, but what if it got out to other people? Then there was the issue of him maybe simply going around attempting to act on his sexual urges with others. It began to dawn on me just how serious of a matter this could become if I didn't have a chat with him. I had intended to talk with him anyway, but I figured now was a good a time as any.
Reaching out to him I brushed away some strands of hair that had fallen in front of his face making the smaller boy smile appreciatively. "Come here Jamie." I sighed pulling him into my arms. "I think we need to have a little chat about some things. I know there are a lot of things you don't understand, but we've got plenty of time now that we are both up and awake." I pointed out glancing at the clock realizing it was only two in the morning, which meant I had hardly gotten any sleep after our first tryst before Jamie woke me up with that wonderful surprise of his.
At least with school being out I knew we'd be able to sleep in and not have to get up. The other thing which was nice is that ever since Jamie's been sleeping in bed with me the Weilers left us alone instead of coming up to get him. I suppose now that he was coming downstairs with me after we got cleaned up there was no need for them to come up for him.
Leaning over I gave him a little peck on the cheek. "Besides, this is important before you begin your new life in the land of us so called normal people. There are a lot of things you have to understand with what we've done together…you know…the sex." I told him with the two of us snuggling together and getting comfortable.
Starting out slowly I began to tell him a little about puberty and the urges boys have pointing out what the two of us did together wasn't necessarily wrong, but many people might view it that way. I also talked about sex in general and how such things were a very private activity between two individuals so shouldn't be discussed with others even if asked about it. What we had shared together was something special between the two of us, and no one else's business. We talked for over an hour with him constantly asking questions seemingly surprised about a lot of things. He did appear genuinely pleased though when I had explained to him how even though I had fooled around a little with Jake, Austin, and even Paavo, that I hadn't felt right about doing more because I was in love with him. Somehow it felt right doing something so special for the very first time with only him. By the time we finished he seemed to have a better understanding about the little nuances regarding sex, but I told him if other things came up then he should basically be careful and try to put it off until he had time to think on things or ask me about it. After a while we both fell silent for a while until he shifted facing me and gazed into my eyes.
"I get it Sammy…but still…I know you love Paavo too." He began before pressing further when he saw I was going to say something. "I don't know how I know these things Sammy…just that I do somehow. I really don't mind because I know you still love me, but it isn't fair to Paavo because I know he'd want to have more of you because I see how the two of you care about each other. I'm happy you waited for me, but you should also be closer to Paavo when he needs and wants it." Jamie pointed out shocking me with how he was telling me he'd allow me to mess around with Paavo.
"Jamie…I…I," shaking my head I truly didn't know what to say.
"It's alright Sammy…I just wanted you to know is all.
We both fell silent again when Jamie looked into my eyes once more and smiled a bit mischievously making me a little worried now. "Um…Sammy…do you think we could…uh…you know. I don't know why, but when I jacked you off it made me feel all tingly inside and right now I feel so…uh…I don't know…it is hard to describe." He admitted with me chuckling knowing exactly how he felt.
"Yeah, remember when I was telling you about puberty and how boys get all horny for some action?" I asked with him nodding. "Well it's happening to you right now. Basically you are just horny as all fuck." I teased him noticing the boy smile at my description.
"Well…if that's the case isn't there something you can do about it?" He wondered out loud in a way I knew he was teasing me.
"Hmmm, I think I may just have the ticket for you. That is if you trust me…but I have to warn you it's something new for me too…something I've never done before for anyone." I pointed out with him getting excited because he knew this meant I was getting ready to do something new that was more than likely going to result in something very pleasing.
"Oh yes…please-please-please." He begged me.
Rolling on top of him sliding my body between his legs I started on his lips pressing my mouth up against his while we embraced passionately. Sliding my tongue inside of his mouth I enjoyed his unique taste feeling him respond back to me when he eagerly sucked the air from my lungs surprising me for a moment. We continued to kiss slowly with our hips grinding into one another his hard four inch erection sliding up against mine which had immediately inflated; although, not as painful like earlier when I hadn't been satiated yet. Jamie was already beginning to breathe hard so I released his lips sliding my mouth along the length of his neck inhaling his fragrance enjoying the sweaty musky scent. There no longer was that lingering scent of soap having been erased in the wash of his earlier passionate sweaty sex making. This was more him, and I loved the boyish headiness of it making me woozy like some cheap drug.
My mouth was on his left nipple now sucking the perky little rounded nub with my lips flicking my tongue up against it. The damn thing even twitched, and with it being so small slipped right out of my lips forcing me to suckle it back up. Jamie writhed around in my arms his erection sliding up against my stomach and lower chest the heat of it almost too hot for my sensitive skin. I've never sucked on a teat before, much less one belonging to a boy, and in many ways it was an arousing experience, one in which I wanted to explore further in the future. Working my way downwards using my mouth and tongue at the same time I spent a few moments exploring his little innie bellybutton before continuing ever closer to the ultimate prize.
Jamie's erection twitched around pressing up against the bottom of my chin and corner of my mouth when I shifted my lips running them along the smooth surface of the boy's still hairless pubic mound. His sex odor was becoming stronger now, overwhelming me with lust until I simply couldn't take it anymore. Spreading apart his legs with my hands I dove my nose right between his puffy tackle box and thigh inhaling deeply while running my tongue along the outer edges of his sensitive membrane noticing his nice chestnut sized little milk factories squirming around. With my head still buzzing from his unique heady sultry sex scent originating from between his legs I scooped up his tangerine sized pouch into my mouth barely able to get them all inside at once. It suddenly dawned on me that his little purse was no longer an empty one containing the allowance of a little boy, but rather had filled up with plenty of coin over the last several months with it currently weighing down heavily inside my little warm damp piggy bank. I moaned eagerly enjoying the taste of the twelve year old boy, feeling him jolt upwards due to the sensitivity of this area. Sucking on his ample sized seed pod, while constricting my lips around the soft membrane, I managed to keep the contents inside until he calmed down.
This was now a new experience for both of us. Never before had I ever contemplated sucking up someone's smooth little boy satchel into my mouth. It felt and tasted a bit odd, but I suppose it had the same flavor as the rest of him, like when I suckled along his chest or the rest of his body. His aroma was a mixture of boy, sweat, and a little back door all mixed up in one giving him a very earthy fragrance that was rather pleasing.
"Oh…oh…Sammy…wh…what are you doing to me." Jamie hissed his chest heaving for air.
Every time he tried to inhale it would catch in his chest making him gurgle because his body would either twitch, jerk, or writhe around on him in spastic spurts. He was extremely excited, and I knew he wouldn't last long. I wouldn't drag this out like I had when I jerked him off. He was too primed up now so I simply allowed his wet sloppy sugar lumps to slip from between my lips before I inhaled the tip of his hard lollipop into my mouth feeling it automatically jolt from the unexpected move.
"OH!" Jamie yelped his hips bucking upwards into the air trying to shove all of his icy hot popsicle inside of my mouth all at once.
I allowed it to slip inside feeling the large snake squirming around at the same time it slid all the way inside of my warm wet damp cavern. I swallowed it all surprising even myself thinking it was way too big to fit all the way inside. Yet somehow it did, giving me a sense that it fit like a glove. The boy instinctively did what came natural grabbing the back of my head rocking his hips in and out of my mouth like a little rabbit in heat. I allowed him to go wild, even encouraging his quick thrusts by cupping his two small ripe apples in my hands and pulling him towards me with each upwards thrust. His hard rippled pole had a unique kind of feel to it on my tongue along with a nice kind of zesty taste. The heat was another thing I noticed making me wonder how something could get so warm.
While he continued to thrust himself inside of my mouth my tongue began swirling around his flared bullet shaped knob. Then there was a new sensation of slickness inside my mouth, adding a different kind of flavor to the mix making me realize he must be producing pre-cum. It had the same kind of light taste like his real nectar, but it kind of surprised me that he was actually leaking considering he was just now in the early stages of puberty and producing his creamy sauce. I figured something like that wouldn't happen until he matured a little more and was able to produce ample supplies of his creamy like yogurt milk. It didn't really matter at the moment because I relished the taste of it flicking my tongue up against his pee slit looking for more.
"Eeeeeeey," Jamie yelped his hips thrusting upwards shoving his hard spike deep into my mouth his entire body getting rigid for a split second while I felt the tip of his knob jolt before expelling a small amount of his boy seed which flowed over the rest of his glans.
My tongue immediately lapped it up before his body suddenly went wild collapsing down hard on to the mattress before jolting upwards his ivory smooth pubic mound shoving forcefully against my nose smashing it making me wince in pain for a second before I clamped my arms around him and held on like a cowboy on a bucking bronco. Thank goodness I didn't have to ride him for the full eight seconds in a rodeo competition because he finally began to calm down after only a couple of seconds. It never ceased to amaze me just how short an orgasm tended to last. I envied Jake who was able to make his orgasms last for such a long time, but in my own experience mine typically lasted only a few seconds before the high came crashing down all around me.
Jamie's erection kept twitching around for another few seconds before I released it from my mouth knowing he was probably very sensitive now. Sliding my lips off of his still rigid dagger I had to giggle because it twitched around wildly like there was an invisible hand trying to thrust and jab it into something. It slowly began to settle down, but remained hard making me sigh and wonder if I was ever going to see him in his natural flaccid state.
Jamie was actually wheezing now his breathing coming in short rasping noises while he tried to recuperate. Climbing over his right leg I slid alongside of his body on my left side leaning over to kiss him gently on the lips. He was still breathing hard, but he returned my kiss with passion sliding his tongue inside of mine trying to get at any of his leftover buttermilk.
"Mmmmm," he moaned inside my mouth enjoying the flavor of his buttery translucent sauce mixed in with my warm velvety spittle. Normally this word, 'spittle,' would have me cringing all grossed out, but swapping it with Jamie turned me on with our kiss lingering on for several moments until we both separated with me pulling him into my body allowing his head to settle on my chest.
"That was incredible," Jamie yawned completely worn out now.
We hadn't gotten much sleep, and I simply let the reply linger without saying a word a bit worn out myself. Never in my wildest dream would I have ever thought what the two of us had done tonight would have ever come to pass. My heart swelled with such passionate love for the long haired twelve year old boy snuggled up in my arms. His hair was all tangled up in his face so I brushed them away with him smiling at me.
"I think you are overdue for a haircut." I whispered to him watching the boy yawn while using his fingers to curl his long hair behind his ear.
"You don't like my hair?" He asked softly not all that concerned one way or the other.
"No I do like it, but it is way too long I think. Maybe we should cut it back to shoulder length so it is still long, yet doesn't hang down to your ass." I teased hearing him chuckle. "I think it would look cute like that." I offered up with him smiling and shrugging.
"Sure," sounds good…maybe when we get up you can cut it for me." He suggested.
"What…me…I don't know Jamie." I responded back. "I've never cut anyone's hair before."
"Well if we still keep it long enough then if you mess up we can get someone else to clean it up." He suggested making sense to me so I smiled thinking we could give it a whirl as the two of us fell silent and once more drifted off to sleep in one another's embrace.
The brightness of the early morning sun filtering through the skylight above my bed managed to finally stir me awake along with Boxey's persistent licking on my face. Shoving the dog away from me while I moaned in protest my eyes fluttered open to the emptiness of the bed. Boxey was acting strangely and I began to panic looking around until I noticed Jamie standing by the bed.
A huge smile spread over my face because he was standing there completely naked with his tangerine sized wrinkled bag sagging low between his legs slightly swaying back and forth in a free like manner. I've never seen them hanging so loosely between his legs before. If that wasn't a sight for sore eyes then his soft three inch limp thumper drooping over the top of his flabby boy grenade most definitely was. I've never seen him completely flaccid before, and the first thing I realized is that in this form it curled in the opposite direction of his erection actually drooping lazily over the top of his satchel with a slight typical curvature that looked natural in shape and size for a boy his age. My eyes took in the rest of him noticing a large amount of his tangled messy hair was hanging over the front of his body. Then the blood froze inside of me because when I looked up into his eyes they stared blankly across my bed and towards the side wall of the bathroom.
"Jamie?" I whispered crawling slowly out of bed almost afraid to touch him.
Standing up in front of the boy he didn't even blink when I obstructed his view making me whimper for a moment completely frightened because there was nothing behind those eyes. "Please Jamie…don't go…you promised." I began to cry softly worried that maybe I would set him off if I began to panic.
It was awful seeing him this way, and I didn't know exactly what to do. I was actually afraid to touch him because he looked so far away, further than he's been in a long time. Even Boxey seemed to sense something wrong stepping over to the boy and leaning up against him. I started to reach out in order to stop the dog, but it was too late as I held my breath expecting the worst. Several moments later I breathed a sigh of relief. Jamie didn't go ballistic which was great, but he also didn't react to Boxey's presence.
"Jamie…don't…please don't do this to me." I whispered finally brave enough to reach out gently pushing him back into bed.
The boy's body resisted for a moment before he allowed me to gently get him to crawl back into bed. Snuggling up next to him I covered us back up with the blanket and looked down into his face noticing his eyes now staring through the skylight without blinking. This was so unfair and cruel I thought to myself the teardrops tumbling freely from my eyes. Why would life give me Jamie only to take him back away from me? With trembling fingers I reached out placing my right hand across his temple turning his head towards me. I thought there was a flicker there so with the palm of my hand on his temple I ran my thumb across his forehead in a soothing kind of way. He blinked giving me hope, but his gaze was still steady and distant making me whimper again. My thumb ran across his forehead again, and I noticed he blinked once more.
"Jamie…you have to fight. Please Jamie…fight and come back to me." I whispered softly hearing Boxey whining next to the bed watching us.
Getting up on my knee I placed my left hand along his right temple and began doing the same thing both of my thumbs now running lightly across his forehead. Leaning over I forced his hardened gaze to look into my eyes. His grayish blue eyes were completely dull and inert, but I continued to look deep inside of them hoping for any flicker of life.
"Fight Jamie…you can do this…I know it." I whispered softly leaning closer and pressing my mouth against his warm damp lips.
There was a short gasp making me sit back up looking into his eyes thinking maybe something had stirred inside of him. "That's it Jamie…you can do this…fight for it." I pleaded with him his eyes slowly blinking.
My thumbs continued to stroke him softly across his now damp brow while I continued to cry softly hoping beyond hope. I saw one of my teardrops splattering in the hollow of his left eye socket seeping into the corner of his dead like gray colored eye. It ended up forcing Jamie to close both eyes, and then I heard a shuddering breath rattle in his chest as he inhaled deeply slowly opening them back up like he was waking up to the world.
"S…Sammy?" I heard the most precious voice ever from him, while one loud spastic whimper escaped my lips before I collapsed on top of him sobbing.
"Oh Jamie…I thought I lost you forever. I love you so much." I sobbed hard now feeling his arms wrapping around my body trying to comfort me.
This was so unbearable, and while I sobbed I began to worry wondering if this was only a temporary thing with him disappearing from us for good at any time. My heart was breaking now because once more I became confused about where things stood between us. If it were something normal with us having to deal with our emotions I could probably handle something like that, but this was completely different, and so foreign, it had my stomach all bundled up in knots.
Slowly I began to calm down wiping away the dampness from my face. I knew my eyes were probably blood shot, and I could see Jamie's concern for me, but that was nothing compared to the worry I was experiencing. I didn't want to know, but had to so I braced myself for our next serious conversation.
"What happened?" I wondered aloud with him gazing at me with such sad eyes shaking his head.
"I'm not exactly sure Sammy, but I do know what you did was very dangerous. I felt it inside of me. I can't explain it, but if I ever get that way again you have to promise me you won't touch me at all. I could literally feel one of my explosive melt downs bubbling to the surface when you reached out towards me so you have to promise me you won't touch me and simply leave me alone." He insisted making me begin to panic for real now because this didn't sound good.
"I…I can't do that. I won't let you slip away from me." I replied firmly with him shaking his head.
"Sammy it isn't like that…well not permanently. It's like my body is still adjusting to things where I sort of slip back to…um…well…to before. It's like I was being tugged on one arm back into the deep tunnel while being tugged on my other arm to stay here." He offered up.
"Yeah…but what if the tunnel wins?" I sniffled concerned while he shook his head.
"It can't Sammy…that much I'm sure of, but a part of me is still there I suppose, while the majority of me is here. That will never change ever again. It may take me several minutes to drag myself away from it, but Sammy while I'm like that it's like waking someone up who is sleepwalking. It can be very dangerous so just leave me alone when that happens…promise me Sammy, because I'd be lost forever for sure if I ever hurt you. I don't think you understand how strong I become when I have a meltdown. Even Uncle Walt has a hard time controlling me." He whispered softly laying his head on my chest.
We continued to talk for a long time with him trying to tell me more about how his autism affected him. He described the way things felt or worked in his mind's eye. It was like he was on a different planet with different kinds of senses. Jamie constantly had to fight and struggle, the frustrations sometimes so overwhelming he simply wanted to scream or strike out at anything. Even his meltdowns were horrible with him recalling each and every horrifying moment of his crashes.
After a while we got up to take care of our morning needs in the bathroom. We had worked up a sweat overnight with our sexual activity giving us a distinct odor that was conspicuously obvious so we ended up taking a sponge bath with a rag and water from the sink. Of course we also rinsed out the rag I had used to clean up our sticky cum from our bodies. Finally I sat him down and gave him a somewhat proper haircut smiling at the results very pleased with how he looked. I had left him with long hair that when combed back of his brow it tumbled down the back of his neck and around his shoulders. Standing in front of the mirror Jamie looked at himself admiring his new haircut and naked body.
"You look so sexy hot." I whispered to him from behind noticing how he was looking closely at all of himself making me realize he's probably never really looked at himself so intimately before. "Notice something else?" I asked with him scrunching up his eyes and looking himself up and down before shaking his head no.
Reaching around in front of him my hand dipped down between his legs cupping his baggy pouch while fingering his soft fleshy boyhood. "You're soft." I whispered proudly in his ear making him chuckle before his tube slowly began to inflate in my fingers because of the extra attention while we both looked on in fascinated wonder.
Sighing Jamie craned his neck looking at me. "You spoke too soon." He laughed while I shook my head chuckling as well. "Maybe it will go away if you suck me off again?" He asked hopefully while I released him.
"Maybe later Jamie, besides I think we've done enough of that for now, and we've got to get dressed. If we got all hot and bothered with…you know…," I giggled seeing him smiling at me knowingly. "Well…then we'd have to get all cleaned up again. Besides, I think it is time we introduce you to Aunt Harriet and Uncle Walt all proper like. Then there's also the whole thing in regards to your twelfth birthday." I teased grabbing his hand and leading him out into the bedroom.
Rifling through some of his clothes because I wanted him to look extra special today I pulled out a pair of red colored skinny jeans and a simple white tee shirt with a very colorful graphic design on the front. There was a splash of red, burgundy, and purple colors that bled into one another along with turquoise and blues making for a very compelling design. Along the one side his shirt had graphic letters spelling out "Rio De Janeiro." Sitting down on the edge of the bed I pull Jamie in front of me while he giggled wriggling around his hips making his rigid penis jiggle around. I rolled my eyes at him while I untangled his underwear, but he giggled playfully leaning in and jiggling his hips towards my face making me flinch when I felt his hard penis slap against my cheek.
The warmth of his erection smacking up against my flushed cheek caught me off guard, but it was too hilarious making me giggle. "Stop it!" I admonished him ineffectively since I was chuckling so the rebuke simply rolled off of deaf ears with Jamie shoving his hips forward the tip of his knob brushing up against my lips.
The expectant look on his face finally did me in because I knew unless I did something about it I'd never get him dressed. Giving in to his needs I allowed his erection to slide past my lips while I wrapped my arms around his thighs cupping his two little rosy colored fleshy orbs pulling him into me. Slurping up his hard fleshy tube into my wet damp mouth made me moan with lust while Jamie groaned excitedly.
Just in one night we've had so much sex together like we were trying to make up for lost time. It was almost as if the smaller boy couldn't get enough of this which made me think that perhaps we would need to talk about this too. For now though I pushed it off in the back of my mind working quickly just in case Mr. or Mrs. Weiler decided to stick their heads up wondering what was taking us so long. With this in mind I made this a quickie, eagerly slurping his hard four inch cucumber into my mouth masturbating him with my lips expertly. It was amazing how in such a short period of time I had become a master of blowjobs. I felt the hollow portion of Jamie's butt cheeks contract and heard him moan excitedly when his climax rippled through his body. I had milked him expertly already several times over the last several hours so there wasn't much left, but somehow he managed to eek out a little more for my palette which I swallowed down obsessively.
Allowing Jamie's now completely deflated soft three inch penis to slip from my mouth the smaller boy smiled mischievously. "See all back to normal." He giggled triumphantly while I rolled my eyes finally managing to get him to slip into his briefs covering up his soft fleshy nakedness before getting the rest of his clothes on him.
"Ready?" I asked standing up and brushing his now shoulder length hair from his forehead with my fingers.
"I…um…think so." He replied looking a little nervous.
Smiling I took him by the hand our fingers interlocking and walked with him down the stairs. Uncle Walt was the first one to see us walking into the kitchen holding hands with a look of incredulity on his features. Setting down the newspaper he was reading he stood up and simply gawked at Jamie.
"How on earth did you manage to cut his hair? He never allows anyone to get anywhere near his head with scissors." The man exclaimed with Jamie releasing my hand and running up to Uncle Walt, giving him the biggest hug.
"I love you so much Uncle Walt?" The boy whispered stunning the elderly man speechless while Aunt Harriet gasped dropping the spatula she was holding allowing it to tumble on to the floor while her knees began to wobble dangerously.
"Trevor." I heard her whisper with a shaky voice as she momentarily mistook Jamie for her long gone son.
Releasing Uncle Walt Jamie quickly walked over to Aunt Harriet gazing at her sympathetically for a moment before giving her a kiss on the cheek and hug as well. "Oh Aunt Harriet I've been dying to hug you for so long." He whispered the tears tumbling down his cute cheeks making me sniffle in the process because it really hadn't dawned on me just how difficult it must have been for Jamie to be locked away and unable to show his affection to those closest to him.
Aunt Harriet immediately wrapped the boy in her arms refusing to let him go. The two of them stood there for several long moments in one another's embrace with Uncle Walt having joined them wrapping both of them up in his strong arms. Suddenly Mrs. Weiler squirmed out of their arms, and with tears running down her cheeks ran out and into her bedroom leaving Jamie standing there in stunned silence.
The boy looked up at Uncle Walt his eyes welling up. "D…did I do something wrong?"
The man immediately picked Jamie up into his arms sitting back down into his seat and hugging the boy tightly to him. "Oh no sweetie…you did nothing wrong. It's just when you came down the stairs with your haircut…you…um…reminded us so much of Trevor. He wore his hair long too, down to the shoulders…and…and you are the spitting image of him. Everyday you look more and more like him. Now that you are twelve years old…you remind us even more of him." The elderly man tried to explain cuddling up with Jamie while the smaller boy sniffled noticing Aunt Harriet standing there having come back out and looking at them while wiping away her tears.
Jamie immediately got up off of Mr. Weiler's lap and threw himself into Aunt Harriet's warm embrace. "I…I'm so sorry Aunt Harriet." He sniffled while she hugged the smaller boy to her bosom before leaning over kissing him on the forehead wiping away his tears.
"For what sweetie?" She smiled warmly at him.
"B…because of Trevor." He hiccupped while she shook her head.
"No sweetie…don't you dare ever feel bad that you remind us of him. From the moment you came into our lives we were blessed. You were a gift sent to us no matter the circumstances, but you are here now with us completely whole, and we are thankful for this. Never think for a moment we don't love you for who 'you are,' and not for who you remind us of." She emphasized to the smaller boy looking him in the eye to make sure he understood this before continuing. "Yes, you remind us of our wonderful Trevor and this is a precious gift Jamie, but you are also your own person so never forget this. We love you for who you are right now and the man you will one day become." She sniffled getting chocked up before pulling the boy into her arms and hugging him so tight unwilling to let him go because she was so happy at the turn of events.
After that to say there was a flurry of activity the rest of the day would be an understatement. There really hadn't been a simple way to break this kind of information to the Weilers, so I suppose Jamie's approach was just as good as any, but it just about managed to give them both a heart attack. After all how do you break this sort of news to someone you love. Sure thinking back, on the one hand this had been a gradual progression in some ways regarding Jamie's improvements, but on the other hand the boy improving to the point of being, for any other lack of description, 'normal' was also very sudden.
The news was so joyful yet also very shocking forcing Aunt Harriet to take a seat after they broke up their hug with her shaking like a leaf and almost burning breakfast in the process. After the initial shock wore off the questions began to fly. I could see this was overwhelming for Jamie so I had them slow down pointing out that yes in many ways he was normal, but there were things that he still had problems with in the way he related to everyone.
The morning hours seemed to slip away with things settling down as the Weilers began to cope with the news. A lot of decisions had to be made in order to ease Jamie into a somewhat normal life. At first the Weilers thought about canceling the birthday party, but Jamie wanted it so bad. In the end I pointed out that it was only the closest people to us so maybe that would be alright, but maybe they should call up Henry asking him if he could close down his General Store completely keeping others from coming in to disturb the party.
We all knew he wouldn't mind figuring he understood well enough about Jamie's condition. Once everyone was there we would try to break the news to them warning everyone beforehand not to get out of control with the important news we would be telling them. We didn't want them to go around calling people having it all over the place with all of a sudden Jamie being snowed under with all the curious people shoving in on him from all directions. We would tell everyone that after the birthday party they could start contacting relatives and families about Jamie's breakthrough, but they needed to be responsible with informing others to take things slow and not overwhelm the boy. This was a very sensible community once they understood the importance of something.
While Aunt Harriet got on the phone to talk with Henry, and Jamie went out to take Boxey for a walk, I finally sat down with Uncle Walt and explained some other issues with him. Of course Jamie and I had kept our sexual activity last night just between us not revealing that part of things to them, but I felt they needed to know about Jamie's black out. I was concerned about it and after telling Uncle Walt with Aunt Harriet joining us they were as well. We couldn't know if this would simply be an every once in a while thing, if it would happen on a regular basis, or if this was something that would fade away like Jamie seemed to think because his brain was still adjusting to the transition. For that matter we didn't even know what aspects of his autism still lingered. For all practical purposes he seemed like an average normal kid now, perhaps a bit out of touch with some of the nuances with life in general, but still in the grand schemes of things a typical twelve year old boy now.
After lunch Jamie took Boxey for another walk with Uncle Walt suggesting to the boy he take Boxey for a long stretch since he would be cooped up later at the party. Jamie wanted me to go as well, and I could see there was an ulterior motive for the request, but I told him I'd come out after a bit. I hadn't talked with my mom in a while or Paavo, and I wanted to give them the good news.
When Jamie left Uncle Walt called up the specialist dealing with Jamie's case. To say the man was utterly shocked was another understatement, and he immediately set up an appointment for the Weilers to come in with Jamie the following day. He had wanted them to come over right away, but they pointed out Jamie was twelve today and had a birthday party. After all these years they weren't going to deprive him of his real first birthday party. The doctor agreed, but did provide some information to them which we seemed to know already.
"So…," Uncle Walt began. "Evidently like we all knew there really isn't what you'd call a cure for Autism. There have been cases of what they call 'Recovered,' where autistic kids sort of becoming more normal in many regards with how they interact and behave in society. I guess since it is a neurological disorder they simply can't say he's so called cured. He assures us though that for the most part 'Recovered' autistics remain just that, and lead normal productive lives. He does want to see Jamie so he can have him tested."
That was most definitely good news as I made my way upstairs to make my own phone calls. Mom was excited to hear from me and I promised her I'd be coming home during the summer, but that we needed to talk about my future of where I wanted to be. I was happy here, and didn't want to live in Des Moines anymore. Of course I had friends there, but I had made several friends over here as well and wanted to stay. She promised that we'd talk about it letting me know that she wasn't opposed to the idea, but we'd have to work it out as a family, which meant my dad too. I didn't argue understanding she was right, but at least I knew she was willing to think about it.
Then I dropped the bombshell on her regarding Jamie. She was definitely flabbergasted, but recognized how important he was to me praising me for all I had done to make this happen. She said it sort of made more sense now why I wanted to stay, and this would figure in prominently as well with any decisions that were made. She also understood the pull that Blue Meadows had on people because she had grown up here. We talked for quite a while, and throughout there were times she seemed distracted putting me on hold every once in a while to take care of whatever it was on the other end. I didn't mind figuring she might have some company or had to take care of something from work since she was always on the computer due to her two jobs.
Even though she had gone back to school at night to finish off her bachelor's degree in Public Administrations, all she could find was part time work doing something she was over qualified for regarding her education. I know it was frustrating for her because she had worked so hard at completing her education. Things were a bit tough for us financially because of all the loans my parents were paying back, and now with my dad no longer at home. So my mom had gone out to find part time work to help with the bills. It wasn't like we were really that bad off financially, just that money was tight is all. It made me wonder at times why my mom had never sold the farm. I know she was getting some income in from that, but it wasn't much after all the expenses of running the orchard was taken into account. I didn't know the full details, but I suppose my mom didn't want to sell her home that's been in the family for so many years. As long as it paid for itself then I was sure she would hang on to the land.
When I asked how she was doing with her health I could hear the weariness in her voice. She assured me that everything was fine, but she sounded tired and had a little cough. When I began to protest she reminded me she goes in on a regular basis for a checkup, and the doctors had assured her that the cancer hadn't returned. When I asked about her cough she merely shrugged it off saying it was a cold she had picked up the other day at work. Even though I was concerned about it what she told me about her doctor's visits was good news as far as I was concerned, so I figured that she was tired from having returned back to work recently along with picking up a regular cold. Anymore, ever since the scare with her cancer I was always a bit touchy about her health.
After I hung up with my mom I talked to Paavo on skype. He excused himself for a moment closing his bedroom door, and when he returned completely naked I just about lost it. He was still the most exquisitely beautiful boy I've ever laid eyes on. Jamie was very sexy too, but in a different way that was difficult for me to describe other than there was something more to his beauty. With Paavo it was the simple fact he was stunningly angelic in a very statuesque kind of way that couldn't be matched or rivaled. Paavo had the same inner qualities of a beautiful soul just like our birthday boy today, but Jamie in essence was my first true love. Nevertheless I loved them both equally so when Paavo sat down in his chair slowly jacking himself off while I did a strip tease I just about lost it when he suddenly climaxed on the other end his dry orgasm making his features shift in a wide range of emotions making me smile.
After that we chatted for a while catching up on things with me telling him about Jamie, while he told me about Steven having found a new boyfriend. Of course I could see the relief on Paavo's face because this left him off the hook with the other boy. Finally I had to close out explaining Jamie was waiting for me and I've already been making him wait for a bit too long. Besides, we needed to get ready for his birthday party.
The party was another hurdle we managed to get over. Of course everyone was ecstatic, but we had prepared them a little so things ended up going off without a hitch. Jamie especially got a kick out of Earl when he gave the man a hug thanking him for all the little treats he had given him during his trips through town. Earl was amazed that Jamie even recalled and understood it, while also relishing the affection the boy was finally able to return to the wonderful gentle man. Even Judge Joe had been invited wiping away tears of joy when Jamie thanked him for protecting him from Damian.
Most of the party was spent with Jake, Austin, and even Roger who seemed to get along with the rest of us despite him being so much older. I got the distinct feeling the older boy had been a bit lonely lately with many of his school friends a bit hesitant to associate with him because he had essentially been Damian's right hand man for a lot of years. In a way it was kind of sad because even though everyone new the reason now behind what really happened, they still seemed to keep their distance from the older boy.
Now at the party Roger seemed to enjoy himself, perhaps because he had been a bit lonely lately. I had to admit he appeared to have grown a little bigger and broader in the shoulders over the last several months like he was maturing more. In my opinion it suited him with his handsome features revealed in an appealing kind of way. Both him and Austin seemed to find a common interest as they began battling it out on the pin-ball machines. Even though the machines weren't as sophisticated like video games these days it still took a bit of skill to rack up the points getting extra balls to prolong the game. Austin was a pro at the pin-ball machines, but Roger gave him a run for his money despite the cast on his right hand as they played against one another racking up the points laughing and having a good time. Even though the older boy had the use of his fingers the cast put him at a disadvantage because it was a bit cumbersome. Of course Jake cheered for his older brother so Jamie felt it only right to root for Roger with everyone getting into the action by screaming their heads off and having a good time.
After that Jamie played against Jake before we shifted over to playing some of the more modern video games. It was then that I noticed the looks Jake was giving towards the birthday boy. I could see it in Jake's eyes how he was starting to become a bit smitten with Jamie his small erection creating a tent in his loose fitting light blue colored Under Armour shorts that was made with polyester dazzle knit fabric, and had a nine inch long inseam. He was also wearing a blue color matching and style big logo Under Armour shirt with the company's large emblem in gold on the front part of his chest. Then there were the little incidental types of contact between the two boys with Jake giving Jamie a hug now and then rubbing up against the birthday boy. This was always done in a discreet kind of manner on Jake's part with him blushing looking around to make sure no one noticed.
The interaction between the two boys didn't make me jealous or anything because I understood Jake and how horny he's been lately for another boy his own age craving a type of companionship which was more than in just a casual kind of way. Jamie didn't appear to catch on to the minor kinds of foreplay Jake was lavishing on him reminding me this was another thing I would need to discuss with our twelve year old sex craved little stud muffin. I wasn't sure if Jamie was interested towards Jake in that type of way, but he deserved to know that the smaller boy was hitting on him so he could determine something like this on his own.
It took a few moments for Jamie to catch on to some of the video games, but before long he was going at it like a pro. Watching him interact with the others at the party it began to dawn on me just how little our birthday boy still didn't grasp, but he sure was eager to learn soaking up any new information like a sponge. There were several minor simple things and nuances we took for granted on a daily basis, things like having to shove money into the pinball and video games. It didn't register with him at first about the whole concept of having to pay for things.
By the time we got home after the party we were all pretty much wiped out. It wasn't all that late, but it had been a very full day not to mention Jamie and I hadn't gotten much sleep the night before, which of course I hadn't minded in the least. Stepping under the shower head I sighed in relief the warm water loosening up all of the tension which had built up inside of me. I hadn't realized just how much on edge I had been at the party. Of course I had a blast and enjoyed it, but there was still an underlying worry that I hadn't even realized was there.
The water felt so refreshing as I washed off the stink of not only the day, but also the sticky sweaty spunk filled boy sex filmy slime that had accumulated on my body from my overnight orgasmic explosions and foreplay with Jamie. The sponge bath had done a decent enough job earlier this morning, but still it hadn't managed to get rid of it all, not like a nice hot shower.
Rubbing some of the liquid soap on my body I allowed my fingers to dip down between my legs feeling my tube inflate slightly at the stimulating contact. Normally I'd be compelled to jack off, but Jamie had more than satisfied my needs, and I knew there was more to come tonight so didn't want to spoil it by jacking off. While I ran my soapy fingers across my pubic mound I suddenly realized I had a few little fuzzy tufts along the base of my penis. They weren't thick filaments or anything, being more on the thin side like you see little boys have along their arms sometimes. They were very downy and barely noticeable, but made me extremely happy knowing I was finally entering that stage in puberty where I'd be soon having proper pubes just like Austin.
Something inside of me seemed to swell with pride because somehow for me this meant I was finally maturing. I wasn't a man yet, not by a long stretch, but this to me made it feel like I was truly on my way. I had just rinsed off my hair when I felt some movement turning around to notice the sexy birthday boy had joined me in the shower all smiles with his eyes taking in my nudity. My semi-hard erection immediately inflated completely when I began to return my scrutiny panting excitedly at his glorious smooth nakedness noticing his penis had once more become fully engorged with blood the thin strands of soft blue filaments just below the membrane of his pale skin along the length of his shaft pulsing with the beating of his heart. How something so mundane as seeing another boy's penis could make my blood pump and my face burn was still a mystery to me, but I couldn't help myself for lusting towards the sexy boy.
Pumping some soft soap into the palm of my hand I pulled Jamie under the warm water getting his body wet before lathering him up paying close attention to his boyhood smiling when it began to jerk around in response to my light slippery touch. Neither one of us uttered a word while he allowed me to wash off the stink of our sex play like I had done for myself. He looked like a new boy now, his skin glistening in the soft glow of the bathroom light. The twelve year old boy looked sexier than ever with his smooth slicked up skin shining with wetness.
Jamie initiated the kiss, our mouths pressing up against one another with heated passion before his lips moved downwards suckling on my left boy breast. The air caught in my chest because I've never been stimulated there before making me realize that Jamie had been paying attention when I had done the same exact thing to him earlier. I felt his hand brush lightly over my fleshy orbs pulling my body up against his while he lingered on my left teat like he was somehow enjoying this as much as I was at the moment. Closing my eyes I leaned back up against the wall allowing the warm water to cascade down on our bodies enjoying the soft tender touch of Jamie's hands and mouth. The entire bathroom was filled with steam now from the hot water despite the fan that was whirring noisily up in the ceiling towards the center of the room.
The younger boy was making me squirm a little now with my attention beginning to focus on his hands rubbing up against my soft fleshy butt cheeks. My eyes were still closed so it made me even more sensitive to the stimulation he was providing me. This was something new for me as well, and I never knew having my ass rubbed could be so sensuous, but it was and I loved what he was doing to me my breath catching in my chest when his fingers ran across my soft fleshy melons ever so lightly.
Suddenly my entire insides seemed to jolt with me yelping in surprise while my body slammed up against the tiled wall along with my hands creating such a noisy banging sound. "OH SHIT!" I literally grunted gutturally having been caught by complete surprise because somehow Jamie had managed to wrap his warm lips around the entire length of my hardened tent peg without me realizing what he was about to do.
My eyes immediately snapped open bulging in disbelief with me gawking at my own fleshy four inch rigid tube buried completely inside of Jamie's mouth. The sensation was more than I could have ever imagined with my animalistic instincts immediately kicking into high gear. My mind shifted around inside of my head while my vision began to blur in a myriad of bright colors. Jamie had slipped into a kneeling position and began to slide his mouth up and down the length of my shaft. Even the sensation of his tongue swirling around my knob was so indescribable making me pant for air. His lips were retreating backwards to the tip making me moan wanting nothing more than to shove myself further inside of that glorious little wet damp grotto. Without thinking I grabbed the back of his head wrapping my fingers in his long wet locks and thrust my hips forward while pulling his face towards me. I wasn't gentle by any means smashing his face against my little fuzzies attached to my mostly blank slate of a pubic mound. I felt Jamie flinch and gag a little, but I was too far gone to care at the moment despite me knowing this was simply wrong, almost like I was forcing myself on him.
For a split second the thought of stopping rippled through my mind, but dissolved immediately when I felt Jamie's fingers clamping around my soft little orbs pulling me inwards towards him greedily while he adjusted slightly to accommodate my large writhing snake in his warm damp cave. I knew immediately he wanted this just as much as me, so I began to do what came naturally slamming myself into his mouth in quick forceful thrusts literally face fucking the younger boy while he slurped, suckled, and slathered his tongue around my glorious boyhood in such a way that I almost immediately blew my nut. Within seconds I felt the familiar euphoric burning sensation shredding it's way inside of my four inch blood engorged shaft before exploding into the eagerly waiting lips of Jamie's mouth.
I could feel my entire body seizing up momentarily with my orgasm ripping through my insides before I began to jolt around once more slamming backwards against the wall. "Oh shit!" I managed to gasp in warning before I lost complete control.
"Uuuumph, uuumph, uuumph, aaaaah, uumph, uuumph," I moaned and writhed around noisily my penis jerking around in Jamie's mouth his tongue running around the edges of my ridge making me even crazier intensifying my already explosive orgasm.
Even my legs wobbled beneath me while my penis continued to spasm trying to expel something it no longer had because I had depleted my entire contents in that one forceful blast. Jamie's mouth kept trying to milk me for more while I watched him swallowing down the meager little custard treat I had provided him making my body once more jolt feeling his lips contracting around my hard tube when he swallowed. Even my testicles jolted around inside of their sagging pouch slapping up against the bottom of Jamie's chin. If my orgasm wasn't so intense I'd be laughing my ass off right now because seeing my boy purse bouncing around beneath his chin looked almost comical.
Instead I continued to writhe, my mouth opening and shutting trying to inhale air, but my throat muscles had become constricted making me lightheaded. My knees buckled and I felt the smaller boy's arms clamping around the back of my thighs helping me remain upright. I couldn't breath and I began to panic when suddenly my throat muscles seemed to open up allowing me to gulp in air; my chest heaving while I let my weight be supported in Jamie's strong arms. I continued to gasp for air my mind coming back into focus, and finally managing to stand on my own once more even if my legs were wobbly.
Slowly Jamie released my soft spent hose from his mouth giggling at the way it simply slipped from between his lips to lazily drape over my now very loose wrinkly satchel, which also slowly stopped jerking around in a spastic convulsive fashion. The smaller boy stood up and smiled at me pressing his lips against mine so I could taste my little treat I had given him. I was beginning to enjoy this part of the exchange just as much as giving it up so allowed our kiss to linger for a while so I could savor the moment.
Slowly I released our tender embrace feeling much more recuperated. "Jamie…you shouldn't have done that." I whispered softly, but not in an admonishing kind of way while the smaller boy looked at me a bit mystified.
"Why…did I do something wrong?" He wondered now a little worried while I shook my head.
"Oh no Jamie…I don't mean it that way. It's just I wasn't ready…you know for this to happen, but I didn't mind…really. It's just…well…I…was sort of caught off guard is all." I tried to explain, but not really getting it out correctly.
There were so many things going through my mind now with this incident, one of them being the amount of noise I had made. I'm sure the Weilers had probably heard and it left little to the imagination what was going on in here. For me it was a bit mortifying. I'm sure they would be a little concerned of course, but also knew they wouldn't be mad about it, not really since they've sort of hinted at this sort of thing knowing I had these kinds of feelings for Jamie. The other issue sort of worrying me right now as well was the fact there's been a lot of sex happening between the two of us in such a short period of time progressing rapidly in intensity with what the two of us were doing together. If we didn't curb our appetites in this regard the next step was something I truly wasn't ready for.
Of course I've heard enough about that sort of intimate activity to know it could be a painful event, but also a pleasurable one if done correctly. I plainly was too inexperienced and naïve right now to know if I was ready for something like this. Last night I could have done exactly that with him, but I was now relieved I had managed to curb myself, but I was worried I might lose control just like I had just now when Jamie had given me a blowjob. I wasn't sure if I would have been able to stop even if Jamie hadn't indicated for me to continue. When the intense feeling had come over me all what was on my mind at that moment was to blow my nut in a hurry. I wanted us to slow down a little because I had deep feelings for Jamie, and wanted this to be more than just sex between the two of us.
Sighing I tried to buy a little more time until later on tonight when we could have a chat in private because this would be something that took more time to explain. "Jamie you didn't do anything wrong, and believe me you made me very happy…and I do mean very happy. It's just we need to be more discreet about what we are doing." I offered up noticing him scrunch up his eyes in thought when I had mentioned the word 'discreet.'
"Um…yeah…discreet…it means we have to be more careful, and also be more private about this sort of thing." I explained with him nodding his head understanding since we had talked about this already last night. "You see we made a lot of noise in here…you know." I shrugged my shoulder with his eyes lighting up realizing what I was hinting at regarding his uncle and aunt. "Also, we need to talk some more later Jamie about what we want this to be for us." I added without going into more details right now letting him know though we could talk some more later.
Getting dried off and wrapping the towel around our waist we opened up the bathroom door heading for the stairs leading up to our room. "Sam…," I heard Mr. Weiler's deep voice noticing Jamie's eyes getting big with fear because of what we had just discussed about being heard in the bathroom. "Do you think we can talk for a moment? Jamie, whey don't you head upstairs. Sam will be right up." The man offered with the smaller boy looking a bit frightened now nodding his head, but doing what he was told.
Following Mr. Weiler out into the living room I hesitated for a moment when he opened up the front door stepping past the screen door. I was only wrapped up in a towel, basically completely naked, so I wasn't comfortable heading outside like this. Uncle Walt smiled though and motioned for me to join him. After a moment's pause I realized it wasn't like we were in the city. After all no one else was around so I simply followed him out taking a seat next to him on the porch steps enjoying the warmth of the evening hours with it just now starting to get dark. Every day now it was taking the sun longer and longer to disappear over the horizon staying lighter outside at a much later hour.
I was nervous and Uncle Walt noticed it so he wrapped his arm around my shoulder and pulled me up next to him letting me know I wasn't in trouble. "Sam…I understand…but I just thought maybe we should have a little talk." He smiled at me giving me a quick hug by pulling me into him briefly before relaxing again making me blush because of the topic I knew was coming.
This was so humiliating, but at least it was just him and not Aunt Harriet, which made me wonder where she had gotten off to until I saw the open barn door. I suppose she had gone into the barn so that us two guys could talk about something a bit awkward in private.
"Listen Sam Harriet and I both told you we understand your feelings towards Jamie, and I suppose in the back of our mind we both knew that maybe something one way or the other would develop in that…well…you know intimate way." He began sighing. "To say we aren't concerned would be foolish Sam, but I think this is something we couldn't stop either so all I can do is offer up some advice and support." He spoke softly trying to ease into the main issue while my cheeks burned, but I listened attentively feeling he had the right to talk to me about such things considering it involved Jamie despite how embarrassing it was for me.
We both fell silent for a few moments until he continued again. "Listen Sam I know you've had this sort of experience before so we just want you to be careful is all. We don't necessarily approve of such types of activities at your age, but we don't disapprove either so just be careful." He added catching me by surprise with what he thought about my experience.
"What!" I gasped out loud a bit shocked at his assumption. "Uncle Walt I've never…I mean…I haven't let…I…um…," I began stuttering with Mr. Weiler scrunching up his eyes looking at me intently.
"Please Sam…I know this is a difficult topic to discuss, but I'm pretty sure from the noises in the bathroom that the two of you are engaging in some form of intimate activity." He offered up trying to be calm about it so I wouldn't become upset.
"No…I mean…yes." I stuttered biting my lower lip because my face was burning up with embarrassment, but not getting across my intent. This was so very awkward. "Um…Uncle Walt it's just that…well I've never…you know…let anyone else be intimate with me like that. I mean Jamie's the first one I've ever…I've…uh…," I blushed turning away my face because this was such a private thing, but to have Uncle Walt assume that I did this sort of thing with just anyone was even more disturbing.
Glancing over towards the elderly man my shoulders slumped because I realized things needed to be said. "Uncle Walt Jamie's my first…you know. I mean I can't believe you'd think I'd let just let anyone do…I mean…," I sighed shaking my head. "Uncle Walt I'm not sure if I really want to talk to you about that sort of thing. It's kind of a private thing…you know." I whispered softly thinking I had revealed too much with Mr. Weiler sighing and thinking about it as well.
"I suppose you are correct Sam, and I am glad that you are more cautious about that sort of activity, but the fact remains the two of you are now intimate with one another. I just think you guys should try to take things slow is all. I'm sure the two of you haven't done anything…um…well…gone to doing anything extreme in that really intimate way…you know…like in the true act of love kind of way." He presented to me making me blush, but shaking my head letting him know that the two of us were still virgins in that sense.
"Um…good then. Again, if the two of you one day get to that point there isn't anything Harriet and I can do to really prevent that without people getting hurt in the process…but we both just want you two to think about it carefully first because this really is something that is a precious gift to either give or receive Sam, so I want the two of you to be absolutely sure. Also if it does happen…," He paused handing me a small box of condoms.
Looking at the box made me flush in the cheeks in total mortification with him pushing forward because I could tell this was difficult for him as well. "I…um…just in case. I mean since the two of you are both…um…virgins," He managed to cough out holding his fist to his mouth trying to clear it again. "Um…anyway…since the two of you have never…um…done that sort of thing with anyone else I suppose you may not need those, but still you might just want to keep them in case. I'm not even sure at your age if something like that would even fit…you know." He coughed again blushing with me doing the same because let's face it my little hard pecker would probably slip right out of a rubber, but still in a way I felt a bit flattered that he felt me dependable and old enough for this type of conversation and responsibility. "Anyway, you have it just in case and if you…um…need instruction on how to properly…," He began before I jumped in.
"No!" I yelped a bit too forcefully before adding. "I mean…I know how to…um…health class you know. We sort of learned about these sorts of things. Um…Uncle Walt…I…uh," I began before reaching over and giving him a genuine hug. "I…um…thanks for being so understanding, and trusting me like this." I whispered releasing him and pausing for a moment. "But…I…um…this is like really awkward and all. I mean I really do appreciate it, but I…maybe is it alright if we don't say anything more. It's just a bit too…well…weird." I sighed turning my head away hearing him chuckling a little and when I glanced over he was nodding his head.
"Yeah…I suppose you are right. We're done Sam, but just remember you can come and talk to me if you have to." He offered up with me nodding my head. "I can be reassured that you will talk to Jamie about this. Harriet and I felt all things considering it was best to talk to you first knowing you were responsible enough to talk with Jamie about it later." He offered up.
Nodding my head I stood up. "Yeah I'll talk to him. We've already talked about some stuff before now, and after what happened in the shower I already told him we needed to talk some more because I want us to slow down with…um…certain things. I care too much for him to mess up what we have for a few moments of…," I paused smiling nervously before looking away. "Anyway, I'll talk with him tonight." I promised turning and heading back inside.
As soon as I stepped inside the bedroom Jamie immediately ran over to me wrapping his arms around my waist. "Are…I…um…are you alright?" He sniffled truly concerned, with me returning his embrace.
"Of course Jamie…I'm perfectly fine. Both your aunt and uncle are worried about us is all, and they wanted to talk to me about it. I can't blame them you know. I mean I care a lot about you too Jamie, but I agree with them that we sort of need to be more careful about things." I sighed flipping off the light switch before leading him over to the bed.
Tossing the box of condoms on the desk I noticed the boy looking at them wondering what they were once more reminding me just how naïve he really was about some things we seemed to take for granted. This was just one more thing I needed to add to the growing list of things I had to discuss with him about tonight, protection.
Dropping the towel from my waist, and crawling under the covers without commenting further Jamie followed suit dropping his as well his usual erection pointing in the air in a nice upward curve. Jamie didn't complain about going to bed now crawling under the covers with me. It was already late enough in the evening, and I was tired anyway, so I simply wanted to snuggle up with him. While I yawned, the two of us wriggled around getting into a comfortable position. After settling down with me spooned up behind the smaller boy he finally spoke up.
"Does this mean we can't have sex anymore?" He wondered out loud making me a bit unsure about whether I should sigh, roll my eyes, laugh, or any combination of the above due to his comment.
"Geeze Jamie, this is exactly what I've been talking about. No it doesn't mean we can't have sex anymore, but I think we need to slow down or at least make what the two of us have more than about sex you know. I mean…yes Jamie…I love the sex between the two of us, but I want this to be about love, and not just two guys busting a nut in order to get off with a few seconds worth of pleasure. If I wanted that I'd have let others jack me off or give me blowjobs a long time ago. I want more than sex Jamie, I want love." I pointed out feeling him roll around in my arms to face me.
"Is that what you think all this was for me?" He asked with tears tumbling down his cheeks making me kick myself for not being more sensitive.
"No." I whispered softly brushing his tears away with my fingers. "No of course not, I'm just talking Jamie because I want us to understand what this means for both of us. I know you love me, and god knows I love you with all my heart, but things have been happening so fast between the two of us. What's happened though can't be undone, and I don't regret one single moment of it, don't ever thing otherwise, but Jamie this is all so new for you. I don't want you to feel later that I've somehow taken advantage of you."
The smaller boy began to sniffle shaking his head. "Sammy how could I ever think something like that. Of course I wanted this just as much as you did. I'm not a complete idiot you know, and I do realize some things, but I guess I can understand how you might be worried about it. I mean if you didn't love me you wouldn't care. I don't want to stop what we have because I don't think what we are doing is wrong. Feeling this good can't be wrong." He began noticing me about to say something regarding how of course sex feels good, so he held his hand to my lips indicating he wasn't finished.
"I do know sex feels good and it is supposed to feel good, but it's you who I want to do that with, not just anyone else. I know Jake's interested in me." He added smiling catching me off guard once more amazing me with just how quickly he picked up on things. "I talked to him at the party and he asked if maybe I'd be willing to do some sexy things with him." Jamie chuckled at my expression falling silent.
"Well?" I asked curious to know what he had to say.
"It's weird Sammy. Last night when you mentioned that you've never let anyone else touch you before I thought it was silly, but when Jake offered to do that with me I wasn't ready to do that sort of thing…at least not with him. I like him as a friend and all, but I didn't feel right about the two of us becoming intimate like that. Was that wrong?" He wondered.
Chuckling I shook my head. "No Jamie, there isn't any right or wrong answer to something like this so long as the choice is yours. Only you can know what the best is for you. Who knows…maybe Jake will still convince you to do some things with him. He can be very persuasive you know." I teased snatching at Jamie's hard pecker making him yelp and giggle.
"Hey, I thought you said we were going to slow down." He tossed back to me craning his neck upwards and sticking his tongue out at me which cracked me up because I wondered where the hell he had picked up that from.
"Yes I said we needed to slow down, but I also said we can still have sex." I teased back, but settled down so that we could snuggle up and chat some more without us once more acting upon our urges.
We talked for several hours about all sorts of things that had been worrying me in regards to our relationship. For me it was important Jamie understood that I wanted us to be together, but that we did needed to be cautious about this in many ways including in regards to who we told about it. In many ways the twelve year old boy was innocent about a lot of things, but seemed to pick up on the little nuances of what I was trying to get across. When he asked about the box I had tossed on the desk I finally told him the conversation I had with Uncle Walt. He didn't know what rubbers were so when I explained it to him he gasped in surprise. Not only that Uncle Walt would offer something so personal to us, but also about the sex act such a device implied.
This then led to discussing relationships that boys tended to have in regards to the female persuasion, and how condoms were used for that as well. It was important to point out to him that for boys condoms were used mainly for the diseases aspect of things while for girls it was used for one additional reason, that being the whole pregnancy thing. On the one hand he understood a lot of things, but on the other hand he seemed completely amazed by what I was telling him. There were so many things to talk about, and as we lay there in bed under the cover of darkness with his questions leading the way I managed to talk to him about any number of issues; especially, the ones I felt absolutely necessary from the very beginning.
By the time we finally nodded off to sleep it was extremely late. Being snuggled up to Jamie felt so comfortable and natural anymore. He had satiated my sexual needs during my shower, but I hadn't done anything for him in return. When I offered to take care of his needs, he thought about it for a moment before smiling at me shrugging his shoulders. He was really tired so suggested maybe we hold off until tomorrow. When I asked if something was wrong he finally admitted with the sex coming practically all at once last night and earlier this morning he had been rubbed a little raw. Chuckling I took a closer look noticing the redness just on the underside of his glans.
Getting up I returned with some aloe vera cream rubbing some of it on to his sensitive hard penis careful so as not to create any friction. He winced a little because it stung at first, but then it seemed to get better. Setting the aloe vera inside the small end table at the foot of the bed I crawled back under the covers cuddling up with Jamie until we faded off to sleep.
It was still relatively early in the morning when I felt myself being shaken awake. Yawning, I opened up my eyes blinking at the brightness of the morning sun shining through the overhead skylight. Uncle Walt was leaning over me with his right hand on my shoulder and his finger up against his lips indicating for me to stay quiet. When I frowned at him wondering what was going on he simply nudged his head towards the stairs letting me know we'd talk downstairs.
With that Uncle Walt headed back down while I gingerly unwrapped myself from around Jamie slipping on a pair of shorts and shirt. I had my usual morning hard-on with the need to take a piss, but I didn't want to do it up here and wake up Jamie since he was sleeping so soundly. Boxey lifted up his head, the tags jingling around his neck sounding loud in the stillness of the room, but we had all come accustomed to it so for us it was one of those natural kinds of noises we heard and ignored. I motioned for him to stay put so he placed his head on his paws and settled back down.
Heading downstairs I took a quick look around the corner making sure no one could see me, and slipped inside the bathroom taking a much needed pee noticing my erection fading away at the same time I emptied out my bladder. I often wondered why us boys always woke up with a raging hard-on. Sure I understood we always had to take a piss first thing in the morning with it effectively deflating once we emptied out our bladders, but it made me wonder why we always got hard. During the daytime if I have to take a piss really bad I didn't necessarily pop a boner, so it just made me wonder. Sighing I shook the last droplets from the tip of my pecker tucking myself away before flushing and then washing my hands.
Both Uncle Walt and Aunt Harriet were sitting at the table drinking coffee with a concerned look on their face which worried me. At first I thought maybe they had changed their mind about me and Jamie, but then I figured that couldn't be it at all because I knew them better than that.
"Um…what's going on?" I asked sitting down across from them with Aunt Harriet glancing at her husband nodding her head indicating he should say something.
"Sam we don't want you to panic, but your father called." Uncle Walt began making me sit upright knowing something was wrong with mom now, but didn't say anything letting the man tell me what he had to say. "It's your mom…she got sick last night and your dad took her to the hospital." He explained seeing the fear in my face and adding quickly. "Listen he said she's fine, but the doctors are going to do some tests. He said that he'd call us later today once he knows more." Uncle Walt finished up with me simply sitting there in a daze letting his words sink in.
"I…I don't understand. What's wrong with her…did my dad say? I mean why didn't he tell me himself." I began starting to panic, but also a little mad at my dad because he wasn't even willing to tell me himself. "He should have called me and told me." I sniffled really hurt and worried now with Aunt Harriet getting up and hugging me. "Did he say anything else? This has to be bad if she's back in the hospital." I complained looking around for something which eluded me for a split second. "I…I've got to call him up and find out what's going on." I added finally knowing what I was looking for, my phone.
"No Sam you can't. Right now he's in the section of the hospital that doesn't have cell phone reception. He's going to be in and out all day long so will be really busy, but I'm sure you will be able to call later." Uncle Walt pointed out with me getting upset now.
"He should have called me. Why does he always do this to me? I hate him for the way he is always treating me." I yelled at Uncle Walt knowing it wasn't his fault.
He seemed to understand and reached out taking my hand in his. "Calm down Sam it's not like that. He was so worried for you because he didn't want to tell you over the phone. He wanted to make sure someone who cared about you was there in person because he knew this would be a difficult thing for you to deal with. Your dad didn't think it would be fair to tell you something like this on the phone, and knew it needed to be done in person. Sam, he did it this way because he loves you. When he called he only had a couple of minutes because he had to get back inside to be with your mom so she wouldn't be alone. He assured us she is fine for now, but since she's had cancer treatment it was important to take her to the hospital for some tests because she was sick. That's a part of the instructions doctors tell their patients after the treatments she's received. Even though she is healthy enough to go home and resume a normal life they take getting sick very seriously because of the low immune system in their patients which take a little time to get over. Even getting a small cold can be dangerous if not monitored." He offered up trying to give me some comfort, but it still worried me.
"Uncle Walt I have to go see my mom in the hospital. I know you need to take Jamie in today for some tests, but I can take the train. I took it up here when I came. Besides, this way I can grab some of my stuff I left at home. I already talked a little with my mom about staying at least for the summer. After that we were going to discuss it." I replied with him shaking his head.
"I'm not sure that's a good idea. The train doesn't head out from over here to Des Moines until early afternoon, and it takes several hours to get there. Maybe it is just better to wait. Besides, your dad might be a little upset about it." Uncle Walt tried to explain.
"I don't care, besides I'm not planning on telling him that I'm coming. The last time he had that 'no visitors' thing in place, and I know if I tell him I'm coming to see mom he'd only tell me to stay put. I've got to go Uncle Walt…it's my mom. I've been gone for such a long time and I miss her. I can't stay over there because I'm not ready for that, but I do miss her anyway." I admitted the corners of my eyes running like a leaky faucet. At the moment I didn't care if they saw me crying, I simply had to get back home.
Uncle Walt looked over at his wife who shrugged getting up. "I'll prepare something for you to eat. It's a long trip over, and once you get there who knows when you'll be able to grab a bite. It's not like your type of diet is an easy one to find." She sighed with the matter being settled.
"I'm still worried about how you are going to get from the train station to the hospital. I hear there are all sorts of crazies at the main station looking for vulnerable kids." He added looking really worried now which also got Aunt Harriet's attention.
Seeing them have second thoughts I scrambled for a way out of it. "Um…we can call a taxi service to pick me up at the station. They can have someone waiting for me with a sign. This way I won't be getting off on the train without someone being right there to pick me up." I offered up noticing them thinking about it for a moment before nodding their head feeling it a workable solution.
My next task then was having to break the news to Jamie. I had wanted to go with him for his tests if nothing else because of moral support, but now everything's changed. He seemed to take the news pretty well, with us spending time cuddled up together on the bed simply being there for each other until it was time to go. Since the train stopped in Council Bluffs, the same city we had to take Jamie for his tests, I accompanied them to the big county hospital. After getting Jamie signed in Uncle Walt took me to the train station dropping me off. It would still be an hour or so until the train arrived, but I understood that he needed to get back to Jamie because that was very important. Giving me a big hug Mr. Weiler wiped away his tears making me promise to call him just before I got on the train and immediately when I arrived in Des Moines. He was a little worried because no one would be on the other end to pick me up other than the taxi driver.
It was after four in the afternoon when I finally arrived at the hospital. Making my way through the front entrance I asked the person at the visitor's desk about my mom and he found the information letting me know her room number. He looked at me a little funny because I was alone and was about to say something when someone else grabbed his attention needing some information as well. At that moment I made my escape finding an elevator and getting to the correct level. Wandering through some of the hallways reading the signs along the way I finally managed to find the correct ward where my mom was being held. Rounding a corner I was nearly spotted by my dad who was standing at a nurse's station chatting with someone who I quickly found out was my mom's doctor. I ducked back around the corner keeping an eye on them and listening to what they were discussing. I had come just in time to hear about my mom's condition.
"Mr. Burke it looks like everything will be just fine. It's pneumonia, and although this can be dangerous considering the recent events regarding your wife's recovery from cancer we've got it well under control." He began with me still a little worried despite his assurances because of my own recent bout with pneumonia. It had thrown me for a loop, but then again I had been knocked over the head and beaten to a pulp.
Focusing back on the conversation I listened carefully. "The cancer treatment had weakened her system so her simple cold developed into pneumonia, but I'm confident she will be just fine. We will have to keep her in the hospital though and monitor her closely because of her recent treatments." The elderly man consoled my father who looked worn out and very stressed a sign on him I had never noticed before.
"Thank you so much doctor. I've been so worried about her, and I'm sure my son will be relieved too once I call him up. I'll also have to call and get more time off from work." My dad sighed, but looked very relieved by the good news, but what he said made me scrunch up my face wondering what he was talking about regarding having to take off time from his job.
"So how much more time can you afford to take off?" The elderly man asked bringing the conversation into a more casual kind of mode now that the official business was squared away.
"Hah, to be honest not much. I used most of it up already during my wife's cancer treatments. I couldn't simply let her go through all that alone, but I'll manipulate the system like everyone else. I hate those types of guys because they abuse it for personal gains like vacation and stuff, but believe me I'm more than willing to manipulate the system in order to help out Claire." My dad chuckled shaking his head jokingly while reassuring the doctor he will be around to help out my mom. This was a new revelation to me because I hadn't known he was doing that for my mom, which made me begin to feel a little guilty about some of my earlier assumptions.
"I see, and your girlfriend, or rather fiancé, how is she holding out during all of this. I mean…I know you guys are holding off with getting married since you still haven't gotten divorced officially yet from your current wife so she can have better medical coverage through your insurance. This must be difficult for your fiancé, having to wait like this sort of hanging in the wind?" The doctor asked patting my dad on the shoulder sympathetically while I shook my head not believing how wrong I've been about some things.
"Sylvia…no…she's actually fine with it doctor. She's in total agreement insisting it is only fair to wait until my wife gets better. She totally gets it doctor, and has even come and visited. Frankly, the two of them really seem to get along well all things considered. I was worried at first about what I was going to do, but like Sylvia pointed out my wife is the mother of my son, and we have him to consider too. Besides, despite how odd it may seem it would crush me if anything happened to her doc." My dad seemed to get choked up with emotion something I thought him incapable of anymore.
"You still love your wife then?"
"Of course I do. I mean, not in the way I used to." My dad exhaled loudly spreading out his hands at a loss of how to explain it properly. "I mean we were so in love when we were younger, and then Samuel came along and things seemed perfect, but then slowly something began to change. It wasn't anyone's fault, not really, just that Claire and I both changed. In little ways at first and then even more. We both felt it and knew we were no longer 'in love,' but we still cared about each other, and of course there was Samuel to consider." My dad shook his head.
"I love my son so much doctor, but I've screwed things up really bad with him. I can't seem to do anything right, and it isn't his fault. It's just I don't know how to talk with him anymore. It breaks my heart every time I do something stupid because he's such a great kid…a smart and bright one to boot…way smarter than I ever was, and he has a good heart. Don't get me wrong he's a spitfire, and gets into plenty of trouble, but his heart is always in the right place." My dad seemed to puff up more proudly when he spoke of me which kind of surprised me, but also confused me wondering why he never said those kinds of things to me instead of a virtual stranger. It's not that I was mad about him saying it to someone else, but basically puzzled because there were so many times I needed to hear it from him personally.
The doctor chuckled shaking his head. "So how old is he then?"
"Twelve…or rather…he will be thirteen in a few weeks." My dad corrected himself.
"Well, I wouldn't worry about it too much Jim. It's in a kid's contract that when he reaches a certain age he creates problems for his parents." The doctor teased.
"No…you don't understand. That's just it. He does get into trouble and stuff, but usually it isn't his fault. I always jump to conclusions though and screw things up even worse." My dad admitted to the doctor.
"Well take for instance last winter break. He got into a fight at school and ended up getting suspended. Of course I jumped all over his case and didn't even give him a chance to explain what happened. I just assumed he instigated the whole thing. Of course I found it a convenient excuse at the time to pack him up and ship him off to a family friend's place so I wouldn't have to confront him about his mother's cancer. It was stupid of me to do it that way, but truthfully; I simply couldn't handle having to try to deal with him at the time." My dad shook his head sadly with the doctor trying to console him while I held back my emotions because this was the first time I've heard him apologize about the incident and actually feel bad about it.
"Well it is only natural Jim. Cancer is a tough topic to tackle." The doctor admitted while my dad shook his head.
"That's not it. You see we don't get along so well, Samuel and me…I mean Sam." He amended shaking his head because he kept forgetting about my preferred name. "Anyway the two of us not getting along is mostly my doing of course because of the asinine things like shipping him off instead of talking with him. The worst part though is several days later we get a visit from this eleven year old boy and his father. Evidently they just emigrated from…um…damn what's that country sort of down across the water from Finland and close to Poland…well sort of…um…oh yes…Estonia. Well anyway, the kid was being bullied and teased at school because of his accent. I think there was more to it, but I didn't want to embarrass anyone so let it go at that. I'm sure Samuel…um…Sam has a good idea of what else it was about. Anyway, some thirteen year old eighth grader shoved the poor defenseless kid to the ground and was making fun and smacking him around a bit. Well, I guess Samuel…um…Sam had enough of it and came to the kid's rescue. From what I understand he hit the eighth grader, who was bigger and older than him, right on his ass knocking him out cold with one punch." My dad confessed to the elderly man sounding proud of the event.
"Whoa, that's one gutsy kid you got there Jim."
"Yeah, tell me about it. Of course I never gave Sam a chance to explain it; instead, I shipped him off ignoring him as usual. I've got a great kid doc, and I can't even tell him how proud I am of him or how much I love him. I really do, but for some reason I simply can't even get that right. I wish I could change things doctor, and I'm trying, when I'm not screwing things up." My dad sighed sadly while the elderly man patted him on the arm. I leaned back against the wall my eyes watering up with emotion because I finally knew for sure that my dad truly loved me no matter what.
"Jim, it will work out. Believe me. It's tough right now, but in the end things always seem to work out. All I can suggest is to be there for him. A time will come when he will need you. When it does come you need to be ready and be there for him. There will come a time when he will understand. Trust me Jim, but right now the important thing is to be there for both him and your wife. The rest will simply work itself out." The man reiterated sympathetically.
"I hope so doc…and thanks…you know…for listening."
"No worries, if nothing else at least you are fortunate to have such understanding women in your life. I mean your fiancé must be a wonderful person indeed if she is willing to sacrifice like this for your wife's health. Then of course there is your wife who seems to support your decision to remarry. It must be tough for her to know how much both you and your fiancé are sacrificing on her behalf as well. Most wives or ex-wives tend to be jealous, but it sounds like she gets along with your fiancé as well." The man offered up while my dad concurred nodding his head with me having to agree as well.
I've never met dad's girlfriend, and now sort of felt bad about how I viewed her as some young teeny bopper kind of sleazy slut. From the sounds of things even my mom seemed to like the woman. I began to realize that there was a lot more to all of this than I had initially realized. Even though my dad had been a real jerk at least he was trying to make things work, and I was beginning to realize I wasn't giving him a fair chance at it. He blamed himself for a lot of this, but if I were honest with myself some of the blame was mine too. If my mom could give this woman a chance, then maybe I should as well.
I waited for a minute or two after my dad went back into my mom's room before I also entered. Stepping past the closed doorway I look around seeing my mom laying in bed drowsing with my dad by her side. A few feet away from them I notice a smaller boy about eight or nine years old sleeping fitfully curled up inside one of those larger sized cushioned chairs that were big enough to sit two people inside.
Looking up my dad noticed me standing there and was shocked for a second before he crossed the room and hugged me affectionately in a firm embrace. "Samuel…um…Sam, what on earth are you doing here? I mean it is so good to see you, but I thought Walt and Harriet had to take Jamie in for some tests. Now that's some wonderful news." He exclaimed catching me by surprise by the way he seemed so happy about Jamie.
"I…um…please don't be mad dad, but when I heard mom was sick I had to come home and see her. I was so worried so I got on the train and took a taxi from the station." I told him hoping he wouldn't be too upset.
My dad looked at me opening his mouth before shaking his head. "Sam it's not that I'm mad just concerned now is all. I mean what if something happened to you along the way I wouldn't have known." He added with me lowering my head knowing in some ways he was right.
"I know dad, but Uncle Walt knew when the train was due in and he made sure I called him when I got to the train station and also here at the hospital. I have to call him again in a few minutes to tell him you guys know I'm here…but how's mom doing?" I asked still concerned despite knowing it's pneumonia.
My dad explained to me what the doctor had told him about it being pneumonia and not a relapse of her cancer, but she still had to be monitored closely and stay in the hospital for several days before she could be released. Even though we talked in hushed tones, our conversation woke up my mom who smiled warmly at me. Smiling back at her I took a seat next to her bed and chatted with her for a bit while my dad went out to talk with Uncle Walt. While we visited I noticed my mom glancing over fondly every once in a while at the little boy sleeping all curled up on the chair.
When my dad returned back to the room he noticed me glancing over at the little boy who was still soundly asleep on the chair. Glancing over towards my mom she nods for him to tell me. My dad hesitated a moment biting his lower lip nervously before sighing and taking a seat on the edge of mom's bed. He finally tells me the boy belongs to his girlfriend, and the boy's mother had to go take care of her mom who had a stroke and also in the hospital. My dad was taking care of the boy because it was a long trip for his girlfriend, and they weren't sure if her mother was going to fully recover. When mom got sick last night he couldn't leave the boy home alone so brought him to the hospital.
Evidently my mom was looking after the kid while my dad was at work with him picking up the boy afterwards. He was teaching the summer sessions because he was trying to make up for some lost time from work. I could tell my parents were cautious about how they told me all of this, but I listened quietly taking in the information realizing it made sense and not in the least bit mad at the boy. This whole thing wasn't his fault either, and I tell my parents that as well surprising my dad, but not my mom who simply rolled her eyes at him and said 'see, I told you.'
"Listen Samuel…I mean Sam," My dad adds quickly catching his little slip once more sighing a bit exasperated because it was kind of difficult to change after all these years which makes me smile realizing that he really was trying. "I have to stay here for a while longer with your mom. They are still doing some tests and I'm going to have to fill out some more insurance paperwork. Do you think maybe you could take Zackary home? He's been here all of last night and all day today. He's totally wiped out. I know you just got here and want to visit with your mom, but honestly Sam the doctors are going to be in and out of her room, and I'm sure they will be taking more chest x-ray's and who knows what else." My dad asks me hesitantly with hope beyond hope in his eyes while I nod my head.
"Yeah, sure, besides like you said it was a long train ride over and I really am a bit worn out too. I was really worried, but now at least I know mom is alright. I'm just about done in myself. Maybe I can come over and visit tomorrow." I tell them as both of them simply stare at me.
"Really, you wouldn't mind?" My dad asks a bit bewildered. "I mean, you aren't upset about…um…Zackary?" He asks me as I shrug my shoulders.
"No I already told you I'm not upset. I can understand why you never mentioned him before. I'm really sorry about how I've acted and all, but I'm realizing things are the way they are. I'm happy now, and I don't want to mess it up for others too. We are a broken family, but we are still family no matter what. Besides, this whole thing isn't his fault either." I tell them as they both smile in relief and shock that I've come such a long way.
I watch as my dad wakes up the boy before introducing him to me. "Hey Zackary, wake up buddy." My dad shakes the younger boy with him slowly sitting up and wiping the sleep from his eyes while running his hand through black curly hair with me detecting some dark brown mixed in giving it some contrast while he looked around noticing me standing in the room.
The smaller boy sizes me up his deep dark brown almost black eyes looking me over like he knows who I am. He seems shy and a bit leery, which I suppose he has good reason to be if he's heard some of the stories about me.
"I want to introduce you to someone." My dad starts out while he watches Zackary lithely get up off the chair he had been curled up on. "Zackary this is Samuel." My dad introduces us having slipped back into my other name making me realize that this was going to take a bit of him getting used to while the smaller boy gave my dad a quirky look before turning his attention to me extending his fist by way of greeting.
"It's Zak," the boy offers up while I chuckle knowingly nodding my head totally understanding where he was coming from giving him the typical knuckle bump.
"Nice to meet you Zak, I'm Sam." I counter emphasizing my preferred name and glancing at my dad who was rolling his eyes shaking his head while the smaller boy smiled appreciatively like we now both had something in common already. Evidently neither one of us enjoyed the way my dad tended to use our full name instead of the simple version that we preferred.
After we all chat for a few minutes, with my dad explaining to Zak what the plan was going to be, we finally say our goodbye's to my mom before he takes us downstairs. My dad gets a taxi for us before handing me some money to pay for it as we head to Zak's home. On the way over it begins to rain dropping down buckets within moments, something that tends to happen during this time of year in this region, the streets already overflowing with the sudden deluge.
When we finally pull up outside of Zak's apartment complex he immediately jumped out of the cab running towards the apartment building heading for cover while I shouted after him to slow down because I still have to pay the taxi driver. He doesn't hear me because it is coming down hard now, so I quickly paid up hustling out of the cab running after the boy. I didn't have to worry about any luggage because I hadn't brought any with me figuring I'd be staying home anyway where all of my clothes were to begin with. The plan for now was to get some clothes belonging to Zak, and then head over to my house a few blocks up the road, well at least once the rain let up a little.
I finally catch up to Zak just in time to see him being slammed into the mud by a couple of older boys who pounce on him like a bunch of jackals on raw meat smacking the eight year old boy around. I'm shocked at first before I once more begin to see red. The anger I've been so careful to burry for a while now all of a sudden boils over once more as I dive in swinging. There were two of them, both boys about my age and size. They saw me coming but figured they outnumbered me so began to fight back not realizing I was a hard seasoned pro at scrapping coming from one of the toughest neighborhood around. They most definitely hadn't counted on having a wild beast in their midst as we all began rolling around on the muddy ground. I started pounding on the biggest kid before the other one jumped on me from behind pulling me off of his friend. They were both on me now, but Zak all of a sudden surprised me when he jumped on the older boy's back yelling and scratching at his face from behind.
"You leave my brother alone," Zak yells out before the older kid literally reaches around pulling him off his back and throwing him down onto the ground really hard before kicking him in the stomach.
I could hear the smaller boy whimper out in pain, and that was all it took as I threw off the other boy from on top of me and literally went crazy unleashing my deeply buried anger. I heard something break with blood gushing in all direction and realized I had smashed the smaller of the two boys' nose. I immediately turned attacking the bigger boy who now stood in shock at his friends face plastered in blood. While he was distracted I laid in to him landing my knee hard in his groin. I swear his eyes literally crossed with him standing upright for all of a second before he crumpled to the ground in a heap without moving or saying a word making me wonder if he passed out.
Zak was climbing to his feet looking all disheveled, but none worse for the wear, so I grabbed him by the wrist and motioned for him to show the way. I was still spitting fire and boiling over like overcooked stew while I followed the smaller boy who led the way looking back over his shoulders at me every once in a while a bit frightened because I was grumbling the entire way. Before long we stopped in front of a brown colored door that looked just like all of the other ones around. I watched while Zak pulled out a key that was attached to a cord around his neck glancing towards me a little nervously. When we stepped inside I stood in the entryway looking around, and cursed because we were covered in mud seeing the boy flinch, but not really registering it in my mind since I was still a bit pre-occupied with what had just happened in the courtyard.
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