Knots, Book 5
by Elias Scott
I knew Matt and Colt were doing something on Saturday. Matt didn't want to talk about it, but I just sensed it. I figured they might be going out to the pond since fucking spots were in short supply. Matt and I only went out to the pond if we couldn't have sex at his house or mine. The weather would soon be turning cold, and then his options would be limited.
There was nothing I could do except talk with Dr. Walker about it. He'd moved me to Saturday because of my football schedule and his new work schedule. He started taking one day off during the week and worked on Saturdays because many of his patients couldn't make it during the week. This worked great for me because Walker's nosey secretary wasn't sitting at her desk giving me looks. Also, maybe I'd have a chance of getting Matt back into counseling with me, and we could resolve some of our issues. I realized that some people would think we didn't have any issues at all. Some would think Matt had the issues, and others would think I had them. In a way, I now realize both were true.
I was whistling to myself on the way to Dr. Walker's office because I knew Dr. Walker might help me see what I could do to solve my problems. He never solved them for me at all, but he made it possible for me to solve them just by talking about them with him.
I couldn't sleep that night because I was thinking about Colt. It was like I was possessed. It was hard to explain. It bothered me, but it was as if I had no control over it. I wanted him so badly, and he was soon going to be mine. How Colt felt about it wasn't on my mind, I just figured he'd be looking forward to having sex with me. I had a sexual rep, at least among the gay guys. You could say I also had a rep among the straight guys too, but none of that mattered in this situation.
On Saturday morning, I grabbed a blanket, my workout bag with some toys, lube, and condoms in it, and jumped on my bike. No one was at the pond when I got there, so I waited at the edge of the water until Colt came. The day was warm, so he was dressed in a tank top and shorts. I surprised myself when I licked my lips. He had beautifully shaped arms – thin, but nicely shaped. I wanted to get my hands on them. His legs were long and well-proportioned to the rest of him. He made me feel self-conscious because I was dressed in a polo shirt and plain cargo shorts. Colt smiled and waved when he saw me. The first thing he did was take off his shirt and show his smooth, tanned upper body. I took this as a sign that he was ready for some action, so I took my shirt off too.
"We shouldn't do anything here," I said. "Someone might come. There's a clearing a short ways into the woods that we can use."
He nodded and followed me to the hidden spot where I spread the blanket out. And before I knew it he had all his clothes off. This boy was fast. I stripped too. We were both hard, and I wanted him so badly, I rushed him and kissed him hard on the lips as I pressed my body and cock into him. He responded to my touch and my kiss with equal pressure and passion. We both sighed. I moved my hand over his chest. His nipples were hard, and I could feel his dick throbbing and dripping precum next to mine. He bent over to lick around each of my nipples, which grew as hard as his. I was out of breath because I was so turned on and filled with lust. It scared me some. I had been and still was willing to do anything to have this guy.
Colt grabbed my cock. I put my hand under his chin and raised his head so we could kiss again. We kissed for the longest time. I grabbed a handful of his hair and held on, turning his head one way and then another. He moaned as I kissed his neck and licked his ear. I bit at his chin and his lips, pressing my tongue into his mouth. I ran my hands up and down his back, over his butt and down the crack of his ass. We pressed our cocks into each other.
I went down on him and then grabbed him around the waist and took him down to the ground. "Lay back and enjoy this."
He folded the blanket behind his head so he could watch me take his cock in my mouth. I sucked and licked down his shaft to his balls, sucking one ball into my mouth while squeezing the other. He stroked my head. I let the ball slip from my mouth and he lifted his legs. I licked the area between his ball sac and his hole and then moved to his ass. Colt pulled his legs to his chest as I pressed my tongue into his ass and licked. I pushed my finger into his hole and went back to sucking his cock. He began to moan again and said, "I'm getting close." I kept bobbing up and down, taking him deep into my throat. He held my head and stroked my hair. His cock stiffened, and he gasped, "Oh fuck," and began to cum. I was so into lust I swallowed his cum without even thinking about it.
He sat up, pushed me down on my back, and took my cock into his mouth. "One good turn deserves another," he said as he started bobbing up and down. He began fondling the head of my dick with his tongue, and then going down to the pubes, before giving the head of my cock his careful attention. I tilted my hips up and down to get the full pleasure of his mouth and felt the cum moving through me, and yelled, "Oh fuck, Colt. I'm gonna cum," which I did in a load that seemed like it would never stop. It had to be one of the longest orgasms I'd ever had. I remember asking myself, "Is this what lust does to you?" The thought scared me because while I loved what was happening, I knew lust was a dangerous thing. Here I was having sex with Thomas' old boyfriend and not caring one bit about Andy's feelings. But I have to tell you, it was awesome. But it wasn't over yet. There was a lot more to come, because while I had this boy under my power and next to me, I was going for broke.
We laid beside each other for a while and let the sun warm our bodies. "Lay on top of me," I said.
He did and then surprised me when he asked, "Do you want to fuck me?"
"Yes. Do you want to get fucked first or fuck me first?"
"I want you to fuck me first," he replied as he moved off me and hunted through my sports bag for my bottle of lube and condoms. "I figured you came prepared."
Colt laid on his back, lifted his legs, and spread lube on his hole. I did the same to my dick. Then he said, "I can't believe we're doing this, Matt. I've wanted it for a long time."
"I had no idea. Why didn't you say something?"
"You were with Andy. It didn't seem right."
Colt's cock was hard. I put my hand on it, and said, "Seems like you want to do this." He laughed. I leaned over him and pressed the tip of my dick to the opening of his hole. I pushed gently as I looked into his blue eyes and then thrust slowly into him, testing his reaction.
"That feels so awesome, Matt. Just the right speed and pressure. Your cock feels so fucking good. This whole thing is really blowing my mind. I've been jacking off thinking about this. Not just here, but standing up with me pinned against the wall or on my hands and knees, or you holding me up by my ass with your dick pressing into me as you bounced me up and down on your cock. I've been thinking about all the things we could do."
I moved further into him until I was deep inside. I laid on top of him, looking into his blue orbs. "You want to try a different way?" I was willing to do anything this guy wanted.
He said, "Like this. Later we can do it standing up or with me on my knees."
I pulled out of him. "Get on your knees, and before I cum you can get on your back again."
I knelt behind him and spread his legs so his butt would be lower. I held his hips and pressed into him. He let out a moan as I began to fuck him pushing all the way in and then coming all the way out and thrusting upward.
"Oh fuck," he grunted. I leaned forward, grabbed him by the hair, and pulled his head back while I kept fucking him.
"Fuck me," he moaned. "Make me your bitch."
I slapped his ass and then reached over and grabbed his cock.
"Fuck me harder," he said.
I grabbed his balls and squeezed.
"Fuck, Matt. You're a pro."
I felt like I was getting close, so I pulled out and pushed him flat on his stomach. We were both breathing hard. My cock was soon lined up with his hole. I shoved my cock all the way in with one thrust.
"Oh shit," he yelled as he arched his back. "Fuck me, Matt. Fuck me hard."
He gripped the blanket. I spread his legs further apart with my legs and fucked him until I was close again and pulled out. "Roll over," I said.
Colt rolled onto his back and lifted his legs, spreading them wide. I laid on top of him and thrust deep into his ass. He let out a breath. He wrapped his legs and arms around me and kissed me as I thrust hard and deep until I exploded inside him. Shit, it was as awesome as the last orgasm. He held me and seemed dazed. My cock was still deep in his ass. He stroked my head as I slowly came down from my climax.
We laid beside each other breathing hard. "When you're ready to fuck me, let me know," I said.
It didn't take long before he was hard again. "I want you to face me and ride my cock," he said. "I want to look at you while I fuck you."
I remember thinking, I wish I thought of that. Maybe next time. I lubed my ass and his dick, straddled his hips, and sat down on his cock. His eyes rolled back in his head as I bounced up and down on his cock. Colt's eyes refocused on me, looking up and down from my cock to the top of my head. He placed his hands on my chest for a while and then ran his hands between my thighs, over my cock, and then back to my stomach. He sat up and kissed, licked, and nipped on my nipples as I bounced up and down on his cock. Colt laid back down and played with my balls and my cock, which to my surprise was hard again.
"Colt, you are beautiful," I said. "I've wanted you for a long time."
"Me too, but I thought it was never going to happen. I hope we're going to do more of this. Maybe a foursome sometime. I'd like that."
"Don't get ahead of yourself," I said. "Let's stick with you and me for now."
Colt grabbed my cock and rolled my balls in his hands. His hard penis felt so good inside me so I began to rock back and forth instead of going up and down because I could feel his cock better. He held my hips began thrusting into me as he got close. I steadied myself and let him do the work. He sat up pulling me close to him, rolled us over, and fucked me hard. He felt suddenly strong and when he came, he called out, "You feel so fucking good, you're so fucking hot."
We kissed and held onto each other. He left his cock inside of me as we spread out on the blanket. I rolled half the blanket over us. We laid there wrapped together for about fifteen minutes with his shrinking cock inside me.
We hated to see it end, but we finally put on our shorts, walked to the pond, and jumped into the cold water.
What I loved about going to Dr. Walker was that everything was always the same. The chairs were always in the same place, each time the glass of water was on the table, and the questions he asked were always the same. "How are you doing?"
"Well, to be honest, Doc, not very well."
"I don't mean to ignore your questions, but I'm beginning to think I don't really need you. I could ask myself the same questions and answer them myself."
"You're free to try."
"No, it's just that when you ask them, everything seems so clear, and I wonder why I didn't ask myself the same questions. But I guess I'm just too involved in my own life to see anything clearly."
He smiled. "You are getting wiser all the time, Andy."
"Thanks, Doc. I think you might be right."
"So what's wrong?"
"Matt's driving me crazy. I told him I wouldn't have sex with him and what's he do. He goes off and has sex with some other guy. Someone I wouldn't mind having sex with myself. I would have if I hadn't been trying so hard to do the right thing."
I took a sip of water. "Yeah. There's this real hot looking boy, Colt. I talked about him before. He used to be Thomas' boyfriend. They broke up, and Matt said it would be wrong to go out with him since Thomas was our friend. I might not have let that stop me in the past, but this time I did and what happens. Matt goes out with him. They're probably having sex right now."
"Why does that bother you?"
"To be honest, Doc, I'm not sure. Part of it has to do with Matt saying he didn't find the sex with me as much fun, and he preferred group sex, and now he's off with Colt. It kinda hurt."
He wrote something down. "Do you think this is really about sex?"
"Doc, I don't know the answer to that question. I think it is, but in a way it's not. Matt and I have always had something special, and it seems like I've lost him and lost whatever it was that we had."
"Who do you blame for that?"
"Hmm." I pursed my lips and thought for a moment. "I'm not sure. It some ways, we're both to blame. I used to be a lot needier than I am now. I'm still needy. That's part of the problem."
"Do you need Matt to be happy?"
"That's the other part of the problem. I think I do."
"Is Matt still your best friend?"
"So what's the problem?"
I started laughing. "Damn, Doc, you're good. There isn't one. Just the one I made up in my head. He still loves me. He's still my best friend. He talks to me about everything. I wouldn't even know about Colt if he hadn't told me about him. Of course, that's part of the problem. My knowing. And I did something terrible."
"Pardon my language, but I yelled out in the locker room that Matt was going to fuck Colt. Matt and I got into a fight, and we both got benched. I felt like shit."
Walker smiled. "Rightfully so. Did you talk afterward?"
"Yeah. Coach made us talk it out, and everything seemed cool between us. But I was still angry, and I brought that anger here today."
"Got it. I have to give you credit though, Andy. You've made a lot of progress. You are more aware and more in touch with your feelings than you used to be. You used to fly by the seat of your pants. Obviously, you still do at times. But that's to be expected. Change is slow. Have you talked to Matt about coming back?"
"Yeah. He acted like maybe he should, but he says he's not ready."
"Why do you think that is?"
"It's not for me to say. But I suppose if I were him, I'd be afraid that you'd somehow make him realize that maybe he's doing the wrong thing. But then, who am I to judge. I've done my own stupid things and hurt people. I've been hurt too. What Matt's doing hurts, but like you said, we're still friends."
Walker cleared his throat. "So let me make sure I have this. Sex isn't required for you and Matt to be best friends? Is that right?"
"But the idea of Matt having sex with someone else bothers you?"
"If sex isn't necessary for you to be best friends, why does it bother you that he's having sex with someone else?"
"Damn, Doc. It just does. I'm a horny teenager."
"I understand that. I've been there. But there are other guys besides Matt."
"I know, Doc. But you have me so mixed up that even that seems wrong. Hell, I could have sex with Ashton and Scott anytime, but I haven't. I can't explain it, but for right now no sex seems like the right thing. What I think is bothering me is that I really want to and it's killing to say no to myself. At the same time, sex has done nothing but cause me a lot of heartache and pain, so I'm swearing off it for a while. I think I'm going crazy."
He jotted down some notes, then said, "You'll have to pardon me for a few minutes. I need to check on something."
I think he had to use the john, but was being polite.
Infuse your life with action. Don't wait for it to happen. Make it happen. Make your own future. Make your own hope. Make your own love. And whatever your beliefs, honor your creator, not by passively waiting for grace to come down from upon high, but by doing what you can to make grace happen... yourself, right now, right down here on Earth. -- Bradley Whitford
There is no scarcity of opportunity to make a living at what you love; there's only scarcity of resolve to make it happen. -- Wayne Dyer
I think that we as a people are always prone to think about, well, tomorrow will be a better day. Well, why will it be a better day? And I think the more that we believe in doing things better, doing the right thing rather than hoping that that's going to happen, let's make it happen. -- Bobby Knight
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