A Matter of Perspective
by Elias Scott
frankf4321s <frankf4321S@-****-.com> Thu, August 14, 5:06 AM
Will, I woke up early and saw the light on my phone blinking. Read your email. It used to be you had kids beating you up, and now you have an adult doing it. Think of your wounds as battle scars and be proud of them. Be sure to return your friend's texts right away. I am glad I can be here for you. I'm going to try to go back to sleep. I need to leave home by 8:30 a.m. Goodnight again Brave Prince. Love ya.
Will Waters <willw521K@*-----*.com> Thu, August 14, 7:38 AM
Morning! well...a few interesting developments here. first off excuse me if my message is a little disjointed or misspelled or screwy, sleep deprivation does weird things to me, I guess everybody really. I only got 2 hours of sleep cause I had another really bad dream and then I was done sleeping. hope this isn't a trend. Anyway couple things, good and bad. first the good...
My old (possibly new again) friend gary came by here earlier and spent about half an hour, until mom came home from church (the bad thing) to talk to me. Anyway Gary was way cool! First thing he said was "whooweee, I'd hate to see the other guy, but I guess from what everybody says he looks pretty fucked up!". We then spent a while talking about fights and black eyes and crap we've both had in the past, sharing old war stories ya know, and it was cool as hell, like old times! Then I asked what the word was about me going on around town and he says EVERYBODY is talking about it big time! shit... And the rumors, except for some wild exaggerations about asshole's injuries, are largely (unfortunately) pretty much dead nuts on. Except of course what was actually said between asshole and me and why he hit me. We were still talking when mom walked in back from work for some reason and politely said hello to Gary and long time no see and then nicely told him that he'd have to go and possibly talk to me later. Now the bad...
Mom said to get dressed and ready because I was going back to church with her to talk to the associate pastor and a couple of board members about what happened. I asked if dad was gonna be there and she said no he doesn't need to be. Told her first of all I'm not talking to anyone about anything without him right by my side, and second of all I'm not talking about this with the associate pastor cause she's a woman. It's just too embarrassing and sexually related so I'm not doing it, period. This kinda pissed her off a bit and she said there's no reason to feel that way and I AM doing it, and I said think again because that's the way I feel and that's the way it's gonna be. I don't like talking back to either mom or dad, but I'm not budging on this one!
She called dad to see if he could leave work for a while and he said no, but we could do this Saturday but not before. Mom then said I could at least go and talk to the two board members coming over at lunch time (one is my pediatrician) because they're both men and she would sit with me too. I refused and that's that, not fucking budging on this. Sorry if you think I'm out of line on this one too, I don't think you will, but that's what I'm willing to do and how I'm willing to do it and I'm not budging an inch on this, and I think dad will back me on this too! So...she went back to work and I'm gonna do whatever until the next shoe drops.
I did ask her why we didn't just call the cops and she said that's not how we handle things in this church, in this town, in this family etc. She did say if the hospital found anything wrong with me last night then all bets would have been off and we'd be talking to the cops right now. She also reminded me that if the police got involved then it would be horrible for the church, the town, her work, and my and our privacy. I hadn't thought of that but she's right in a way, even though she's wrong in a way too if ya know what I mean. what a mess. She also said your dad kinda took care of Todd pretty well too but his punishment may not be over with either, and that's what the bigs at the church want to talk to me about before anything else is decided. I figure if asshole is gonna be gone for at least two weeks then Saturday is just as good as today to talk about this shit, and once again NOTHING is gonna happen without dad in the room. I WILL NOT BACK DOWN ON THIS NO MATTER WHAT!!!
wow...long ramble there but had to get it all out. I feel better, for now. who knows what's next.
I'm gonna go out back and throw a stick for Max for a while and contemplate my navel or something...
love ya bro, please gimmee yer thoughts when ya get the chance.
will and Max (woof!) ha!
Frank is always quick to reply. I really need that. Sometimes I'd get all fidgety waiting to hear from him. I really rely on him for his wisdom. He wrote me back about some unarmed black teenager getting killed. I feel bad because I really didn't pay much attention to it at the time. That's what happens when we're all caught up in our own problems. We forget a lot of other people have problems too. I feel sorry for that kid's parents.
frankf4321s <frankf4321S@-****-.com> Thu, August 14, 8:47 AM
Just checked to see if you'd written and to tell you that another young unarmed black teenager was killed today or yesterday. Count your blessings I guess.
You do need to tell the people at the church the story so they'll get rid of the asshole as you like to call him. You are right. It would have been better to get the police involved and it's not really as much of a reflection on the church as it is on the pastor. Nothing will happen to your dad unless the pastor files assault charges. (And that's very unlikely) But right now he's not going to do that, and I don't think the church will let him either. You can file assault charges though. I understand the need to be with men rather than a woman. And you're right. Saturday is fine. But who knows how many rumors will be flying around.
I'm glad you had a chance to talk to Gary. It's good to renew old friendships and know that he cares. Don't forget, you do have to take the good with the bad or the bad with the good, whichever way you want to look at it.
You're in the situation, so in many ways, you are in a better position to make the best decisions. Just remain calm and think before you open your mouth. Like I said, pause a couple seconds and think out your answer. Don't say anything out of anger, although you have every right to be angry. The church people are probably shitting in their pants. Your mom should already know everyone in town has heard what happened so it's a little too late to put a lid on it. After all it's the asshole's fault. I have to admit, I enjoy calling him that too.
Try not to become a pain in the ass though. You don't want people to turn their anger on you. You want it focused where it should be.
Well, got to go to meet my new friend. Well, possibly a new friend. We're meeting to get to know each other. Now keep in mind, I've lived 71 years, have two children and two grandchildren, so my nest is secure, and at my age, meeting other guys for a little fun might be acceptable. In the next chapter of Knots Andy and Matt go a little crazy and tie some more knots in their lives with some older guys. I don't approve, but it's fiction after all, and it was fun to write.
Have a great day. Never in our wildest dreams could any of us anticipate all this. What an adventure. lol I know it sure doesn't seem like it, but when you go back to your journal years from now, you will laugh at it and be proud of yourself for having made it through.
Sometimes truth is actually stranger than fiction.
God loves you and so do I. I pray He gives you the strength and wisdom you will need to get through this.
It got so I could hardly believe how much my life was changing in just a few days. The fact that asshole hit me had more of a positive effect than negative. Frank was right. I have battle scars. I like that he called me Brave Prince. In some ways that's true, but to be honest I've been scared shitless the whole time. Some things you just don't have control over and the pastor hitting me was one of them. Anyway, something great happened.
Will Waters <willw521K@*-----*.com> Thu, August 14, 11:28 AM
YES!!!! something fucking great happened!! Well two things, but we'll get to that! Beware though, I'm what grandma calls punch drunk (?) cause I still haven't slept but who has time for that? Gary and Jason (another old-new friend) brought me McDonald's and chilled in the backyard with me n Max! They just hadda leave for football practice that just started up. They fuckin treated me like some kinda celebrity about what happened with asshole!! Ha! I HAVE FRIENDS AGAIN. I HAVE FRIENDS AGAIN. I HAVE FRIENDS AGAIN! !!!!!!!!
and dad called me and said I did the right thing with mom.
Crying. Gonna go. Love u!!! Will
frankf4321s <frankf4321S@-****-.com> Thu, August 14, 12:37 PM
I read your email just as I was heading for home and it brought tears to my eyes because I was so happy for you. You once said you didn't believe a person could have tears of happiness, but now you know they exist.
Just got home a few minutes ago. Brian, the guy I met with, and I had a great morning and afternoon. Keep your mind above the waist. We got along quite well, and if we'd have planned better maybe things would have worked out, but I told him I didn't want to rush, so we'll see what happens.
Glad to see you so happy.
I couldn't remember the last time I'd cried because I was happy. There have been plenty of tears over the last two years and none of them were happy tears. So in a way, I began to think they didn't exist. My perspective began to change when Franksent me the picture of the boy sitting in the rain. He made me realize there are lot of different ways you can see things. Of course, it helps if life isn't fucking you over and heaping piles of shit on you.
Will Waters <willw521K@*-----*.com> Thu, August 14, 5:07 PM
Sounds like you had a good time! Awesome! Hope he's cute!
Sooo tired, body is just crashing finally! Gonna be in bed and asleep before 8 pm for first time in ages. Just too much ups and Downs and not enough sleep. At least more ups than downs now. Gawd...who'd ever thought Frank? Mom n dad out for a short while themselves and I plan to be sound asleep like a dead man soon. All's quiet on the northern front tonite finally.
Love u Frank.Will and Max (woof!)
frankf4321s <frankf4321S@-****-.com> Thu, August 14, 5:13 PM
It can be as hard to sleep when everything is going right as when it isn't. Your excitement is wonderful. Hope you were so exhausted you managed to take a long nap after the guys left for football practice.
I'd be interested in what kind of things you talked about. Not necessary, if you don't feel like talking about it, but I'm a writer after all, and I'd like to know what guys talk about after all this shit has happened over the last couple years along with the attack by the minister.
I'm so happy for you. Love ya.
Will Waters <willw521K@*-----*.com> Thu, August 14, 5:23 PM
Oh Frank I definitely want to talk about it, hell I wanna shout about it!!! Especially with u! But I still haven't even slept yet at all because I've been so wound up!! I'm like so tired I'm almost ready to crawl. I'm gonna share everything with ya tomorrow honest but if I don't crash I'm gonna fall down. Had great long talk with mom n dad before they went out, it's gonna be ok cause they're right by my side. I'll share all tomorrow promise.
Love ya's! Will xo
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