Discovering Love

Written by Rick Beck

Chapter 4


My heart was in my throat and my hands were on Greg's crotch and that heart attacked I mentioned earlier, was upon me. There was no escaping our fate.

"You two almost done?"

Greg bridged up on his neck to look upside down at a mirror image that appeared only a little younger and just a little more handsome than he was. The new boy's soft blue eyes cast a lazy gaze that fell upon us to discover our posture of familiarity. Busted!

"Get lost, squirt. I got the table after school," Greg growled low in his throat, not seeming to be much disturbed that we had gotten caught fooling around.

"I see that, only I'd like to use the table to shoot pool. You can do that some place else. I'm limited with what I want to do."

"We're doing it here. Split while you still can. You don't want me to get up."

"I'm Doug."

He spoke casually as if we'd just met down at the 7-11 store. He looked past Greg as though he wasn't even there to address me. He noticed my irresponsible hands, but he didn't act like it caused him any difficulty as he continued approaching the table.

"I'm Martin," I said, removing my hand from the front of Greg's undershorts long enough to shake Doug's friendly hand.

He stepped back a step, looking not at all threatening, but looking at everything in front of him. His eyes found the front of my underwear as he checked out my position on the table between Greg's legs. I waited, as he seemed almost ready to suggest my next shot. I would find out later that Doug missed nothing but he knew better than to challenge his older brother. He did however make an art form out of aggravating the hell out of him. There was a careful balance between that and annihilation and I would find that Doug had spent years figuring out just how close to that line he could come and still successfully manage to avoid Greg's wrath.

Greg watched him carefully with his eyes and that gave me time to look him over as well. Doug would have been my height and weight and lacked any muscles I could find. What I could see was adorable and if I hadn't already given my heart up to Greg, I'd certainly have thought Doug was worthy of such a gift. If Greg had an antithesis, it was Doug.

"Nice meeting you," he said politely as he backed up toward the stairs. "How long will this take, brother of mine?"

"Not long. He was just paying up."

"Where do you find these guys? Doesn't anyone in this town know how to play pool?"

While he sounded a bit like a wise guy, his broad smile told me it was all in good fun.

The words spit back and forth too fast for me to keep track of them. They were like two polished standup comics each bidding the other to take his wife. Doug had much lighter blond hair, lighter and less intense blue eyes, and a complexion that was next to perfection. He had none of the strength or power of Greg while having none of his flaws. His features gave a gentle flutter to my heart each time I stayed on his face. There was no doubt they were brothers and that made the circumstances under which we met seem somewhat surreal.

"He's going to give me lessons," I said once there was a lull.

"Yeah, I see. I'll do some homework until you two are finished. Just be careful not to get hurt, Martin. Pool can be a rough game the way my brother plays it."

Doug trotted up the stairs and disappeared. I could see the bottom of the door and I watched it for a second to see if there was to be an encore of their lounge act. It stayed closed.

"Don't mind him. He won't say anything. He knows better."

"I feel really strange with him knowing what we're doing down here? I mean I've never done nothing like this before."

"You're just giving me a massage, that's all. You lost and I won and he knows the rules. You aren't the first guy that lives around here to give me a massage."

"You play with him?"

There was a silence that left me to jump to my own conclusions.

"He's my brother."

Greg's eyes penetrating me again, making me feel self-conscious. I was pressed between his warm legs and one of my hands was still on the front of his underwear. I would feel him moving in small spasms under my palm.

"What you thought was going to happen before squirt showed up... it wasn't going to happen."

"What are you talking about? I've never done anything like this before so you know a lot more about it than me."

I was as cool as I could be and I laid it all on him. It was obvious what he was talking about and I knew that we hadn't been but a few seconds from getting a lip-lock on one another. For the life of me I couldn't figure out how we came to be in that condition. It wasn't something either of us planned or something we spent a lot of time thinking about, it had simply happened while we were doing something else. I can't explain it and I don't understand any more about it than that, but I wasn't letting him off the hook as easily as he thought he was going to wiggle free of any responsibility for what we were up to.

"You know what I'm talking about. I don't mind guys playing with my pecker, but I ain't swapping no spit with 'em, understand?"

"If you say. I never gave it a thought."

Greg had lost his harsh edge until Doug showed up. He'd gentled out and seemed to be caught up in the moment, and now he was back to his arrogant swagger. Was he even aware of the energy we had been creating together? The spell wove by our proximity and physical contact, was broken by the reawakening of his superiority gene. I looked for an easy exit, hoping we might recapture the moment at some later date.

"I can keep it that way all night?"

His bravado was boyish self-promotion with little meaning in it for me.

"What way?"

"Hard! I can keep it up eight hours if I want. Hard as a rock."

"Why would you want to?" I asked.

"Don't you know anything about pleasing a woman?"

"Not really."

I felt it pulsing under my fingers as we were speaking of it, and that made me squeeze, which caused him to wince and then close his eyes. It pulsed more and I was just squeezing for all I was worth while trying to think of a way to get out of there. His eyes stayed on my face as my eyes were on my hand and what I imagined might be under his underwear. As badly as I wanted to go, ten times that is how badly I needed to see him in all his glory. My focus was narrowing down to a five digit operation that was super heating my face and hand.

His hips came off the felt with a sharp moan as his lips parted so he could get more air. He seemed powerless as we both watched intently to see what was going to happen next. The heat was rising again and there was an intense fragrance coming off him that filled my brain with lustful ideas. Sweat rolled down on both of his sides. I squeezed and he moaned again, letting his head tilt back on his shoulders as he filled his chest with air.

When I checked his face, he seemed to be losing that rough edge once again as he became focused on me, and more particularly, what I was doing to him. Using his elbows, he propped himself up so he could get a better view. He looked a little like he was in pain, but there was something else about the look of him that told me there was a certain power in my palm. Greg wanted me to escalate our activity but he would need to ask.

"Yeah, do that some more," he said while trying to take a breath. "Up and down on it some before you squeeze it hard. I like it when you squeeze."

I didn't want to be there, doing that to him, but I was and I couldn't get my hand off of it, and I'm sure he'd insist I do that before I left. As I watched wondering why he was doing it, he used his palms to push down on the waistband until his underwear was down on his thighs except where I held his dick through it in the middle. His eyes pierced into me until I let go of him, and with no hesitation he let me see it in an uninhibited display. He was watching my face to see what my reaction would be. It took my breath away in spite of me making every effort not to look in awe of him.

My Humming Bird heart had me feeling faint from the excitement. I had seen it in his jeans that first day. The impression it made on the material, leaving an impression on me that had stirred me dozens of times late at night after the fact. Now, it was right in front of me for the taking, his steely hot flesh, under his unrelenting stare.

The head was cut deep into the shaft and stood out fat on top of a thick tan shaft. We both watched it standing out of his dark blonde pubes. His smell was stronger then ever and I inhaled as much of his scent as I could consume. My brain got lost in a delirium for him. How did I get myself into such a mess? His chest pumped bigger gulps of air as his mouth hung open. I wanted to grab it but I was afraid of what happened once I did. He'd have won and I didn't want him to win, but what I wanted meant there was no other way than to give in to him.

My own underwear was stretched to the max and I held onto myself trying to keep from losing control. I'd been to the brink half a dozen times and I hung so near that I knew it would start pumping of me without much more stimulation. I'd been constantly dripping drops the entire time we'd been down there and my hand was soaked in it, but I didn't want to lose it after I'd gotten this far. There was no telling if I'd ever get a chance like this again. I didn't know what came next but I was ready to give in.

I could hardly breath as our eyes met at his dick.

"Go ahead. It's okay. I don't mind."

His words were conciliatory, gentle, even inviting. If I didn't know what I knew about Greg, I'd have dove on it.

He seemed engaged beyond the point of no return and as I moved in across the fallen underwear, he went flat on his back, looking at me with his head cocked to one side and the right side of his face touched the felt. He looked like a helpless little boy and that's as close as Greg would ever come to looking helpless. He seemed to need it as much as I wanted it.

I leaned back toward the object of our affection. I was afraid that if I let myself go I'd explode. I was hypnotized by being so close to it. I studied its contours, the veins, and how proud it stood out. I leaned my face forward and breathed deep. His fingers rubbed his pubic hair as he lay otherwise motionless, waiting for me.

"How long can you keep yours like that?"

"Like this. I don't know. Why would you want to be hard for eight hours? That's got to hurt after awhile."

"Women like it. Most guys can't go more than fifteen or twenty minutes. I can go all night," he bragged, not moving, watching me. "You can touch it, you know. It's what you've wanted from the get go. It's okay."

"How do you know what I want?"

"It's in the eyes."


"The way you eat me with them. You are a hungry boy, Martin. Go ahead. You know you want to feel it. This is your chance. You don't want to miss your change."

I didn't like to admit it but he was right. I wrapped my fingers around it two inches below the head. I'd never seen a hard dick close up and I was going to make the most of it. The way it stood up made it easy to get a grip on it. His eyes closed as soon as my fingers tightened. As hard as the flesh was, the skin was ever soft and luscious to feel. As I squeezed the pee hole opened wide and more of his scent was released into my nostrils. It filled me with desire for him as I breathed deep.

"Up and down," he said softly.

I knew the mechanics and I knew I was now jacking him off. His hips kept time in a half beat, and my motion quickened. He seemed to be getting lost in my hand. I let go of myself and reached up between his legs. I started rubbing the space behind his balls vigorously while I beat him off. He seemed to like it before and I didn't think I could go wrong going back to the tried and true.

"Yeah," slipped out of him. "Like that. Oh, that's good. A little faster now. Squeeze it hard."

His hips raised to help me. My fist went into his pubes and he moved his hand. He was breathing hard and I could feel him pulse as I continued to speed up my motion as though I was doing it to myself. Each time I would stop to give it a good squeeze, our eyes would come together. Once when I paused to squeeze, he yanked off his boxers, spreading his legs as wide open as the table allowed. He looked at ease with his nudity.

The space behind his balls hardened as his hips continued to work on my hand. I watched the view and memorized what I was seeing, touching, smelling, and especially the way he looked. If this was the only time we were to be together, I didn't want to forget a single detail.

"Faster now," he said. "You're doing good. Just a few more minutes."

I could feel its girth expanding in my fingers and the head thickened visibly as the flesh darkened with excitement, growing as hard as the shaft it crowned. The ridge around it became a barrier that no longer yielded to the force of my hand colliding with it. Greg leaned on one elbow leaning forward to watch my handiwork. I leaned forward so I was over his dick. Our eyes were six inches a part and I could feel each breath bursting from his wide open mouth. His breath was sweet and the muscles in his chest and arms tightened as I pounded away. I no longer stopped to squeeze and he no longer made that requested. We were eyeball to eyeball staring at one another as he came closer and closer.

"Yoooooo!" Came a yell from on high.

"Fuck," Greg said, suddenly lying flat and holding his hands over his face. "It can't be that late already."

"Who's that? Will he come down? Should I keep doing it?"

"It's my father. He'll come down if I don't go up. Get dressed."

I was still holding onto him when he pulled away from my hand, pivoting off the table and moving into the shadows under the stairs and on the oposite side form where his pants were. The light from the window showed me his shoulder, part of his arm, and his ass. As I pulled on my pants, I watched. I could see his arm moving rapidly. His hips were twitching and he was leaning forward so his ass was round and spread slightly apart.

His arm continued at high speed and while I couldn't see what he was doing, it didn't take long to figure it out. Then there was a loud grunt followed by loud gushes of air as he stood straight up and his ass and legs seemed to be flexing all the muscles possible as his body twitched and jerked. I could hear his breathing as he leaned against the staircase with his right arm, panting like a race horse.

"Toss me my pants. Man, I needed that. I'd have been hard all evening. Man, you had me so close a couple of times."

"I did?"

"You know how, kid."

"Here," I said, waiting for him to turn so I could look at it.

His dick arched out in front of him as he moved. It had lost some of its vitality, but not enough to make it look modest. Greg pulled down on it and wiped the tip in his hand before he bent to pull up his jeans. I stood barefoot and shirtless watching him. He sneered as he zipped and then buttoned them.

"There's a door back in that corner. It's got a bolt lock. I'll lock it back after you go. I got to go upstairs or he'll come looking for me."

"Sure," I said, sitting down to put on my socks.

"Don't take all day," he said.

"I won't," I said.

Greg started strutting toward the stairs.

"8PM" he said.

"8PM what?"

"Friday night. Party will start about eight. You better get a pass to stay out. My parents will say it's okay if you need. You can't go home if you drink. That's the only rule at my parties."

"Okay," I said, surprised the offer was still open.

He hesitated just before his head went out of sight on the stairs, glancing back at me about like he had that first day on the road to make sure I was still watching. I was.

When the door closed I finished putting on my shoes and tossed my shirt onto the corner of the table. I went to where Greg had stood under the staircase. As I drew closer the smell of him and his sex was intense. There were papers and magazines tied in bundles as well as big gobs of wet cum that now sat in a few places and ran down in others. I reached out to touch it and ran it through my fingers, putting it to my nose and inhaling the most potent smell of him yet.

I unzipped my pants and scooped up more of his juices. As soon as I felt it on myself, I was as intense as I'd ever been while jacking off. His cum was like lightening in a bottle. The liquid shot out of me and passed over the papers and magazines, colliding with the wall under the stairs. There were two, three, and then four potent squirts before I had to grab on to something for fear of falling. I pumped a little longer until all the passion had left my dick. I gathered myself together so I could make my exit.

I wiped my totally soft dick in my hand before using my shirt to wipe my hand and then I put it on. I went to the back door to let myself out past two disabled bicycles and an old skateboard that was minus a strut and two wheels. They'd apparently been there for some time.

My journey home would be lost in space as I relived the event. Just standing at the back of his house, I was marking it down as my first noteworthy sexual experience. I thought of some things when I was just past puberty, but that was indeed experimentation because if you removed the excitement of the moment, you have a lesson in physiology that was masked in a curiosity about my fellow man, or boys. There were no feelings that went with it that lasted longer than the activity. Not any I could identify or remember. There was no overwhelming need to know anything in particular, just mechanics and boys doing what boys do.

There was no doubt that this was in a different league. I wasn't sure if it would ever happen again with Greg, or why it happened once for that matter. I thought he needed it a lot more than I did, but I also figured he knew I would go for the idea. While it was the most intense and exciting thing that had ever happened to me, that was because of what I felt for him. It was a bad idea to let a sexual experience turn me into some toy boy he could use for relief anytime there wasn't anyone else available. I wasn't that far down the long lonesome highway that I was going to let someone like him walk all over me. There had to be a way for me to get what I wanted without letting him push me around.

Standing there listening for his voice or some sign of him, I thought about him inviting me to the party. I remembered the near kiss. I remembered that just before his father came, we were falling into the same posture as when we almost kissed the first time. Some insanely bad timing had his brother interrupting us the first time and then his father. How bogus was this? I don't know it would have happened but I sure wouldn't have turned the idea down if he came up with it.

In his voice I could hear the words, "Kiss me you fool."

That got me chuckling. What a dork I had become, and what else was I now that another boy knew that I would? Well, I had an invitation to a party, an all-night party, and that meant anything might happen.

Greg was still a mystery. I knew he fooled around and he liked being the center of attention. He was also dangerous as well as someone who made me feel uncomfortable. He also drew me to him like no one else ever had. In spite of all the things about him that told me to steer clear of him, I knew I wouldn't steer clear of him for one good reason. I couldn't. I wanted to be with Greg and I would wait for the next time. Having that thought was scary and I wanted to argue with myself but first I had to get home before my parents sent out a search party.

A bird in the hand is worth more than a bird in your pants.

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