A Time of Change
by Andrew Passey
Chapter 14
I woke early the next morning, uncomfortable from sleeping on the floor. Gavin was asleep (and it was Gavin to me that morning, not Gav. Gavin was the intolerant racist, Gav was the boy I loved. I know they were the same person but it helped me to separate them out.
I got dressed, leaving him sleeping, looking so innocent but as I looked at him I felt annoyance at what he'd said. I went down to the kitchen for a drink, once I got there I was surprised to see his Mum sitting there at the table drinking a coffee.
"You're up early Tom" she said with a warm smile.
"Couldn't sleep" I said with a tired smile.
"Me neither. We're a bit short of breakfast stuff, I always forget the boys eat like horses. Fancy coming with me to the shop to pick things up?" She asked. I had nothing better to do and was happy to avoid the bedroom so I nodded and followed her out to the car.
"Everything ok this morning?" She asked me as we drove out the drive. For some reason I've always found it easier to talk about things in a car, I guess you're sat next to someone rather than opposite so it's easier to let the words flow out when you can't see the other person's reaction. I didn't really want to tell her I'd argued with Gavin but then again she'd no doubt sense the atmosphere between us so I decided to be honest.
"Not really. We had a big argument last night" I said sadly.
"I thought I heard some shouting although thought it was just you boys being high spirited. Was it about the Gorilla comment by my husband last night?. I could tell you didn't find it in the last bit funny, neither did I"
"Yes, and a couple of other comments. Gavin wasn't happy about that and we ended up saying some nasty things to each other. I........called him racist." I said feeling embarrassed to admit this to his Mum. She was silent, obviously thinking hard before launching into a long speech.
"My husband wanted us to move here because in his words "the blacks" are going to take over and he didn't want to live in a country where the whites were no longer in charge. That was not my reason to move, I was desperate to get out of there, even though it was my home. I wanted Gavin to get out of the toxic racist culture of apartheid, the white supremacy lies, the everyday casual and evil racism.
So the move was something I was very happy to do. Unfortunately my husband has brought his racism with him and Gavin and David are still infected but I hope the longer the boys live here that will fade. It's not perfect here but it's certainly not like home. I haven't been as vocal with the boys as I should be or with my husband. I haven't challenged his views or let him know I disagree with them. That is now going to change. I'm really glad you told Gavin how you feel and you were honest with him. That will help him change, I'm sure he'll try hard to now he knows how you feel. The crazy thing is that while Gavin might think it was all great back home, he doesn't seem to understand that his relationship with you would probably see him thrown in prison if we still lived there"
"Er what relationship?" I asked innocently hoping she was meaning our friendship but also confused why it would see him in prison!
She laughed, "Oh Tom, I'm not blind. I can see the see the way you look at each other, how you treat each other. Also, I do all the washing of Gavin's sheets, towels and clothes so I'd have to be an idiot not to realise what was going on and that you're doing stuff together. I'm happy you've found each other, you make a lovely couple and I hope you can help Gavin get away from his toxic views. I have no time for racism and no time for homophobia. His father would not approve of what is going on between you but if he does find out I'll back you up. Gavin is lucky to have you and hopefully he'll realise that tolerance should apply to all people whatever their skin colour or sexuality"
I blushed as she said all this, it was embarrassing for her to know what me and Gav were doing. And what I really wanted to do with him as we went forward! Still it was nice to talk to her about it and good to know she was ok with it. Although I was slightly concerned she'd guessed, hopefully she was just more perceptive than other people, and I guess we were teenage boys, we hadn't been careful to avoid making a mess of Gav's sheets which was a bit of a giveaway!
We talked a bit more to and from the shop. It turned out she was much more political than I realised so it was interesting getting a different take on things. She seemed very bitter about what had become of her homeland and how most people she knew there were extremely racist, "radicalised by bullshit" she said which I thought was a good phrase! As we approached their village she reiterated that she was there for me and Gav if we needed.
"And if you both want to come out to the rest of the family then let me know and I'll be there to back you up". I was grateful to her and she gave me a hug as we got out the car. It helped me come to terms with what Gav had said, just because he was currently a racist and his dad and brother were, his mum gave me hope. And her explanation of life back in South Africa had made me see how easy it was to have gone down that road. I felt better about things as we went into the house.
"Gavin needs you and you can help him lead him down the right path" she told me as we went into the kitchen "breakfast will be half an hour or so if you want to make up with him" she smiled warmly as she said this and I knew that was the right thing to do. I thanked her and headed upstairs.
Gav was awake when I went into his room, "oh I thought you'd gone" he said coldly from his bed, still under the duvet and obviously still annoyed from last night.
"I went to the shop with your mum" I said as I started to strip off.
"What are you doing....?" He asked in surprise as I got naked.
"Making up with my boyfriend" I said with a smile climbing into bed next to him, "if you want to make up with me anyway. I'm sorry about the things I said last night although I'm not sorry why I said them. But I have to accept you come from a different culture to me and have different views" I said, slipping my hand down to feel his soft dick.
He moaned as my fingers gently manipulated his foreskin, "of course I want to make up with you. I'm sorry too" he said softly.
"We can make this work but it's going to be hard. I might accept you have different views to me but I can't lie that I find them wrong. Particularly when what we are means we'll be judged by people because of who we fancy. I hope in time you'll come round to my way of thinking. Now have you got any Vaseline or cream?" I asked.
"Don't think so, why?"
"I want you to put your dick in me, I want you to be fully mine" I said with a smile as I kissed his cheek.
"I am fully yours, for always, and my dick is always in your mouth!" He said smiling back.
"That's not what I meant" I said and moved close and whispered what I was planning in his ear.
"Oh. Wow. Really? " he asked in shock, he was maybe a bit more naive than I thought he was!
"Yes!" I said grinning at him. It turned out he didn't have any suitable supplies and I hadn't brought any with me so we just wanked and sucked each other off before promising to take the "next step" at some point soon. I could feel Gav was a bit reluctant, and that was fine, I could handle waiting.
After we showered clean I broke the more important news, dropping it casually into conversation.
"Oh by the way, your mum knows about us"
"What about us?!" A note of panic slipped into Gav's voice.
"That we're boyfriends. I didn't tell her, she'd told me it was obvious from the way we looked at and treated each other. I guess we should have realised that messing around and cumming on your sheets all the time might be a giveaway!" I smiled as I said this but Gav still look horrified.
"Fuck. How can I go downstairs and face her with her knowing what we've been doing together!?." His concern was etched over his face as he softly said those words. I put my arm around him to try and calm his nerves,
Don't be silly, she's very supportive and says if your Dad finds out she'll support us. She obviously very perceptive, I guess I can't hide how I feel about you from your mum. Anyway are you embarrassed about us, about what we've been doing? I'm not." I said with a comforting kiss on his cheek.
He smiled back, "No I'm not, I love you and that's nothing to be ashamed of" he said softly.
I held his hand and we walked downstairs before splitting apart as we went into the kitchen.
Gav's mum came over and hugged him when she saw him.
"What's that about?" His brother asked suspiciously for the kitchen table.
"Just wanting to let me my first born know how much I love him. Do you want me to hug you to show you as well?!" She asked with a smile at David who wordlessly shook his head with a worried look on his face causing his mum to laugh.
After this weekend and our major argument, things went back almost to normal but there was still a bit of unsaid words between us. We'd both hurt each other and we also both knew that Gav's views were a sticking point for me. I did hear from Rob that Gav was trying harder to engage with Pete, a black boy in his class and that was hopefully the first step to shedding the racism of his upbringing.
As we fast approached the end of term and the summer holidays my world was turned upside again and I was genuinely devastated. I was lying on the grass next to Andrea one lunchtime when she broke the news.
"I don't know how to tell you this, my heart is breaking into a thousand pieces but we're moving away. Far far away. My dad has got a new job in Australia and at the end of term we're moving permanently" her eyes welled up as she told me this and each word was like a kick in the balls. I was almost in physical pain at hearing this.
It turned out her parents had been planning this for a while but in that strange way adults have sometimes they decided it would be less of a shock for their children if they waited until it was all finalised and agreed before telling them. Andrea was fuming and upset, feeling like her life was being decided for her. I was pretty inconsolable too. I loved Andrea even though I had Gav and our lives would have been complicated trying to manage both my relationships. That was something that I had looked forward to though, Not an ending like this, a fizzling out of our time together.
"But that's only in two weeks!" I complained when she told me the date they were leaving. It just all seemed so fast.
"I know, and we've got a lot to squeeze in" she said shocking me by looking around to see if anyone was close, when they weren't she unzipped my trousers and got my dick out. "No point waiting for me to be 16, I want to do everything with you before I go" she said as she started to wank me off. Being wanked off by my girlfriend for the first time was very special but she didn't know her way around a dick like a boy does! Still, it's not exactly rocket science and it wasn't that long before I was shooting with a moan of enjoyment.
"Ugh does it always do that?!" She asked me shaking cum from her hand after she'd finished me off.
I giggled, "well yeah, how do you think babies are made?"
She giggled too, "well....I guess you need to show me" she said and wiped her hand clean.
Though it went against everything we'd agreed and against everything we would usually do, we basically planned a sex day. Both of us skiving off sick and spending all day together in my room, learning our way around each other's bodies. First oral before we then went all the way for the first, second and third time. Memories to last a lifetime but over all too soon. We promised to write to each other and hoped to see each other again but the other side of the world was a long way away. It would be many years before we did see each other again. After many tearful farewells it was over. Andrea was gone and the school holidays had arrived.
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