Nevermore!

by and © Henry Higgins

Chapter 11 - A Reckoning with Fate

I could only stand there, just inside the door to my kitchen, Rusty wrapped in a blanket in my arms and whimpering, staring at Rog.

"Wh... Where'd you come from?" I finally managed to squeak out, fighting the rise of a guilty, "how-the-hell-am-I-going-to-explain-this" feeling.

"Never mind that," Rog said evenly, "what've you got there?"

"Rog, this boy's been hurt!" I said. "He needs you."

"Wha... How th'... Here, Jim, put him down on the table right here. I can look at him better that way." As I laid the trembling Rusty and blanket onto my kitchen table and then opened where the blanket joined, Rog's eyes widened. "Jesus, Mary, and Joseph! What kind of maniac would do something like this to a kid," he exclaimed. Poor Rog... He'd never been able to completely abandon the roots of his Roman Catholic upbringing.

"Here's what I know: the guy had clamped clothespins with nails driven through them into the boy's nipples. He had some kind of locking pliers on his scrotum. And Rusty, that's the boy's name, says that he screwed him up the ass with no lubricant. Did I miss anything, Kenny?"

Kenny shook his head. "I think you pretty much got it, Jim. I warned Rusty about going with this guy; he got kinda weird with me once, but I backed off."

Rog looked pointedly at Kenny. "Rusty hustles, too?"

Kenny looked down, but he answered Rog straight. "Yeah."

"Okay. You guys stand over there so I have some room. Rusty, can you hear me okay?" Rusty barely nodded his head. "Okay. My name is Roger Hansen. I'm a doctor and I'm going to see how badly you're hurt. Then we're going to do what we can to fix you up. How old are you?"

"He's fourteen, Rog." Kenny spoke up from where he was standing, glued to my side.

"Is that right, Rusty?" Rusty had become quieter. He nodded barely perceptibly. Rog began what looked to me like a routine physical examination, poking and prodding Rusty, listening to him breathe with a stethoscope, and carefully looking at the wounds in the boy's breasts. Then he progressed down the Rusty's abdomen to his genitals.

"I see something that looks like you vomited. Am I right?"

Again Rusty nodded, but then said, "Yeah. When he first put the clothespins on it hurt so much I almost blacked out. I had just eaten with Jim and Kenny, and it came back up."

"I'm not surprised." Roger's lips made a thinner line than I had ever seen. It was obvious to me that he was using every ounce of self-control that he had. "Rusty, I have to feel around your penis and testicles to see if you're seriously hurt down there. I need you to tell me where it hurts and how much. Can you do that?"

"Y... Yeah." The boy was still sniffling a little.

Rog continued his methodical examination with the boy's penis. Gently, he rolled back what was left of Rusty's foreskin as the penis began to grow. "It looks like he left your penis alone, am I right?"

"Yeah."

"I see that you're beginning to get erect, Rusty. Don't worry about it; just let it happen if it's going to. In fact, it will help to me to be sure that your penis still works the way it should."

Rusty grinned, as did my Siamese twin that was still attached to my right side and who couldn't take his gaze from his friend's growing erection. "It still feels good, Dr. Hansen." By now, Rusty's penis had grown to full erection and I, too, was taking in the scenery. Rusty had about four inches, nicely proportionate girth, and it arched over his belly with such a pronounced curve that it nearly touched his belly.

"Good. That's as it should be," Rog observed.

From the boy's penis, Rog explored his pubic mound, gently prodding and feeling under those lovely, emerging red pubes. "Be sure and tell me if it hurts and how much."

"Okay."

From his pubis down towards his scrotum, Roger continued the manual examination. As he reached the purple mark on Rusty's scrotum, just above his balls, where the scumbag had attached the pliers, Rusty yelped. "It hurts there, Doc; oh, it hurts a lot!"

"Okay, Rusty, you have a pretty healthy bruise there, too. I'm going to move on down to your testicles, now." Rog was probing the boy's soft tissues gently but thoroughly. "I feel a little swelling in here just above one of your testes, Rusty. Does it hurt?"

"Not nearly as much as it did, Doc."

"Good. That's a good sign that it's going down on its own."

Throughout this part of the manual examination, Rusty remained erect - something that I noted with positive interest, but drew no further comment from Dr. Hansen, who continued to examine the boy's legs, feet, and toes. Then he looked at Rusty's arms, hands, and fingers, paying particular attention to his wrists, which had had to support much of his weight when he was tied up. Red abrasion marks showed where the bonds had been.

"Okay, Rusty. Now I need you to turn onto your side so I can look at your backside. Can you do that yourself, or do you need some help?"

"I'll try, Doc. Which way?"

"Turn away from me; that's it. Now I'm going to move your top leg and bend it at the knee so that I can see your anus."

Rusty obliged and as his leg moved up towards his chest, his cheeks spread to reveal a swollen, purple ring where his anus should have been.

"Again, Rusty... Tell me when it hurts and how much," Rog prompted. Rusty nodded as the doctor slipped on a glove, coated it with K-Y, and began to feel around the heavily bruised anus.

"Ow, oh it hurts there - a lot!" the boy cried, and then began to moan.

"Okay, son. Take a deep breath and let it out slowly," Roger said in a soothing voice. "That's it. Now, breathe that way again. I'm going to have to feel inside. Keep breathing deeply." As he slipped one of his smaller fingers through the boy's anus, Rusty tensed noticeably and continued to moan. I was so involved that my arm began to hurt. Then I noticed that Kenny was gripping me so tightly that he was cutting off my circulation.

Withdrawing his finger, the doctor looked carefully at the blood, mucous, and fecal remains that coated the gloved finger. Rusty's moaning stopped. "Looks like the guy might have come - I see what looks like semen here."

"Yeah, Rog," I said. "I thought I saw it running down his legs when we first got there."

"Rusty, could you tell whether the guy came?"

"Oh, yeah! He was crying and gasping and everything," Rusty answered.

"That's enough for me to confirm it; it also means he didn't use a rubber. Doesn't surprise me; his kind never do. Well, it looks like you need to prepare for another trip to the blood lab, Jim. Can you handle that?" Solemnly, I nodded yes. "Be sure to get him in tomorrow so that I can have both results by the time you bring the boys in Monday evening, okay? The hospital has a blood lab that's open on Saturday mornings and I'll leave a referral slip for you."

"Both boys?" I queried.

"Yeah." Roger's lips were still a tight, thin line.

"Okay, my friend. We'll be there."

"Great. Rusty, what's your last name?" Roger stuck first one syringe and then another quickly into Rusty's right butt cheek and then turned the boy back over and covered him again with the blanket.

"Simpson," replied Rusty.

"I think you're a very lucky young man. You could have gotten hurt so much worse than you did. But right now, I don't see anything wrong that won't heal in a week or two. I gave you a tetanus shot for where the nails poked you and an antibiotic shot to help prevent infection. Jim, I'll need you to listen carefully as well as Rusty. For those wounds, first pour some hydrogen peroxide on them and then rub a little antibiotic ointment in. Every few hours, apply cold compresses to help the swelling go down. Because they were deep punctures, all of you need to watch these wounds carefully for any sign of infection. Those signs include swelling and redness around your nipples, red circles around them, or red streaks radiating out from them. With the injection I just gave you, the pills, and the antibiotic cream, there may be no infection at all; but if there is, call me immediately.

Rusty, your anus is pretty swollen and bruised; so wrap a couple of ice cubes into a paper towel or wash cloth and put that next to it - again, every few hours over the next day or two. The antibiotic ointment should help that, too. The ice will help ease the pain from where you are bruised and help the swelling go down in your bum. I'm also leaving a pack of antibiotic pills. Be sure to take them on schedule and take them all, even after you start to feel better.

"There's some swelling around your testicles; so if you can stand it, put an ice pack down there, too. And for your scrotum and your bum, take lukewarm sitz baths two or three times a day with Epsom salts. Jim has a special tub that would be perfect for that. Try to alternate them with the ice packs. Finally, I'm going to have Jim get some stool softeners. Be sure to take the full dose, so that when you have a bowel movement in the next few days, it will be mushy and not hard. That way, it won't hurt your anus as much where it's bruised. Finally, we need to do something to notify your parents. Whom do you live with?"

"I live with my mom, Betty Simpson," the boy replied.

"And I suspect that she doesn't know anything about what you do with men, right?"

Rusty nodded.

"Normally, Rusty, she'd have to know. She's legally responsible for you. And if she knows you're hurt, then she'd have to know just how you got hurt," Roger said.

Rusty's eyes widened; I suspected from fear that his mother might find out.

Roger continued, "I understand that you don't want her to know. Ultimately, I think she should know; but now would not be the best time to tell her. Plus, you'll need some support before you're ready to tell her. So I think the best thing for you to do is to spend a few days with Jim and Kenny, if we can work that out. It's obvious that these two guys love you and will take good care of you. I think in a few days, much of the soreness will be gone, so your injuries wouldn't be so noticeable to your mom as long as you can keep your chest and wrists covered. Then you could go back home. Also, I think it would be a good idea for you to stay out of school, at least for Monday and Tuesday. I'll write a note for you. Jim, do you think you could handle caring for these two guys for a few days?"

"Absolutely no problem, Rog."

"Including no fooling around?" Roger peered intently at me.

"Yeah. No problems so far, right Kenny?"

"Only that you won't have sex with me," Kenny pouted.

Rusty stared, wide-eyed.

Roger grinned widely. "Good! Kenny, you don't know how happy I am to hear that. And, Jim, good for you, too! Kenny, do you think you could help Rusty get into the bathroom and cleaned up? Just wash him all over with soap and lukewarm water very gently. I need to talk with Jim about a couple of things, including how we will deal with Rusty's mom. When we get things figured out, we'll let both of you guys know what we recommend. Okay?"

Kenny was at Rusty's side in a second. "Cmon, brother. Let's get you cleaned up." He gently helped the boy off the table and the two made their way down the hall, Rusty leaning on Kenny for support, and still sporting his hard-on.

"Kenny, there's clean towels in the bathroom closet, okay?" I offered.

"Sure Jim."

I turned back to Rog, ready for my lecture. But even though I was expecting the worst, it didn't come.

"Jim, that was an incredibly loving thing you and Kenny did. These cases make me sick. I honestly think you saved that boy's life - not just physically, but emotionally as well."

"Thanks, Rog. I'm astonished at how close those two are. I learned quite a bit today."

"Like what?"

"Well, when Kenny and I went for his blood test today, I thought maybe he'd like to have lunch at a diner and then go to a movie. The diner is in the shopping center across from the lab, so we walked there. On the way, we passed a video store and saw Rusty hanging out in front, only I didn't know at the time who he was. I just saw him look at me intently and then at Kenny the same way; so I figured they must know each other somehow. Kenny told me in the diner that it was Rusty, that Rusty was with him the day they checked me out and found that I live in the neighborhood, and that the two of them hang together at school a lot. I guess the cool kids shut them out, so they've been good support for one another.

"Then later at the diner, I learned that a waitress there has been very supportive of them. She tells me that she knows of four or five kids who hustle and hang around there. Kenny and Rusty are the closest of any of them and she tries to look out for them as well as she can. She's slips them food so they won't go hungry. She's been around the block a couple of times and so she knows how it is for these throwaway kids."

Rog was solemn as he listened to my story. "That's quite an apt term, isn't it - throwaway kids? Jim, I get real scared for these kids playing the hustle game when there's weirdoes lurking out there like the one Rusty ran into. One thing we need to do is to alert the other kids about this guy. My guess is that Kenny has the best shot at that - and maybe the waitress. Can you help them?"

"Absolutely."

"Okay, now tell me straight - how are you going to deal with having not one, but two gorgeous kids, one who can't keep his dick down, depending on you over the next few days? Are you sure you can handle it?"

"Let me tell you what happened last night and this morning. Then maybe you'll see why I feel so good about it," I said.

"Shoot."

"First, you were right about Kenny's fever. It broke in the middle of the night. I had sat in the guest room with him; so when he woke up, I was there to help him get mopped up. We talked a little and then he went back to sleep and I went into my room to sleep for the rest of the night. This morning, I found him in bed with me - with his hand wrapped around my woody. So I stopped him, took his hand away from my dick, and said I would explain later why we couldn't do that. He was disappointed, but accepted what I said."

"Okay."

"Then without thinking, I suggested we shower together. I was so pissed with myself that I had successfully disengaged from him in bed and then here we both were with boners and I was suggesting that we shower together. He asked me about that and I had to think long and hard about it before I could answer him. I first admitted to him that I was confused and would have to think about it more, but that for right then, being close together and naked was okay, even with boners; but having sex was not. He accepted that. So we showered together, boners and all, and I didn't feel compelled to push sex play with him."

"Impressive."

"Yeah, so he wanted me to wash him, you know - like our mothers used to do?" Roger nodded. "I was gentle but thorough, and again was able to wash his genitals, boner and all, without feeling I had to give them special attention. When I was through, he said that no one had ever touched him as lovingly as I had. He offered to return the favor, but I said I'd have to take a rain check because we needed to hurry and get breakfast so we could get to the blood lab. We kidded and horsed around, but no sex play."

"Jim, I'm really proud of you. You have come so far in two years! When I think back to the shape you were in when you had just gotten out of prison..."

"Yeah, I know."

"So, Jim, how are you doing with Rusty? I saw you checking him out."

"Oh yeah, Rog - I can't deny that the kid is highly attractive to me. I mean, those bright red pubes and his hazel eyes and the freckles on his face. Two years ago I woulda been all over him like flies on honey, paying twice whatever he wanted. You know that. But after today, I honestly don't know. We were with him such a short time in the diner. To me then, he was, like Kenny's friend. So I was polite and supportive. But I didn't do anything to come on to him and I don't think he did any coming on to me, unless it was that first time we saw him in front of the liquor store. Man, if looks were battering rams, that kid could get into Fort Knox. But when we found him in the beehive, well all of the sexuality just went out of it for me and I was concerned with what we had to do to get him away from that creep and back to safety."

"Did you recognize the perp?" Roger asked.

"No, I've never seen him before. He dodged around Kenny to lunge at me and I gave him a knee in the stomach, which gave me just enough time to get around behind him and literally kick him out of there."

"Quite a natural response," Roger mused.

"Seems so to me. Anyway, another thing that I learned is just what a strong bond those boys have between them. Kenny sensed something was wrong with Rusty and wanted to leave even before the movie was over so we could look for him. He figured Rusty would be at the beehive and he was right. If they didn't sincerely love each other, I don't know that Kenny would have been that sensitive."

"The beehive?" Roger looked puzzled.

"Yeah, that's what the kids call it - that restroom in the park where I cruise a lot. Apparently, it's quite a popular meeting place, even though it's filthy, like so many of them."

"That could be part of the appeal," Rog observed.

"Well, I've sure learned to turn on to that smell of stale piss and mold."

"That place has been quite a lifesaver for you, hasn't it - at least, up until yesterday."

"You got that right, buddy."

"Okay," Rog continued, "So how do we get these boys to be able to stay with you for a few days?" Roger posed.

"Kenny's already here. We know that his dad doesn't give a rat's ass where he is and Kenny feels like he has found a new home. For Rusty, I think I should have him call his mom and ask her if he can spend a few days with Kenny. He could offer to have me come over to meet her if she wants. We could explain that Kenny is staying with me for a while until his dad gets some things sorted out. We could even use the cousin story."

"The cousin story?"

"Yeah. At the diner, I introduced myself to the waitress as Kenny's out-of-town cousin who is visiting. I found out later that she knew right away I'm no cousin, but she could also tell that I'm no john looking for my next punk. Apparently, she could see that I was more interested in taking care of the kids and she was okay with that. She said that between us, maybe we could keep them in school and out of jail or the morgue."

Rog shuddered. "I don't think we'll ever know how close we came to that today."

"I agree," I added. "And whenever I think about it, I keep coming back to that uncanny awareness Kenny seemed to have."

"You got that right! He is one unique kid," Rog observed.

"Rog, what do you think about my boundary setting? This morning with Kenny it was 'naked and hard together is okay; but for play, everybody keeps his hands on his own dick.' I can probably live with that one. Also, I'm going to encourage the two boys to play with one another if they want; but with me, it will be nothing more than a good wank in my own room with my own hands."

"Sounds good so far, Jim; but what if Kenny wants to jerk off with you - or both of them want to jerk you off? Could you still keep your hands to yourself?"

"From the way Kenny and I have bonded today, I think I'm getting so much more out of that relationship as a mentor than as a lover that I can control the urges. Sure, the interest is still there and Kenny wants to have sex with me, so progressing to sex play would be very easy. But, I'm finding it easier and easier to focus on being a mentor and not a lover. The more I get into being a mentor, the more I see how being a mentor and a lover at the same time are mutually exclusive. I'm confident that I can control myself."

"You're going to have to, Jim. We're pushing the envelope way out, as it is. You know there's no way in hell that the cops or Child Protective Services would ever condone an ex-con like you supporting two teenage kids, no matter how needy they may be and even if the relationship were totally platonic - and we both know that it isn't. Moreover, God forbid that the media should ever get hold of this."

"Yeah, I've thought about that one, too. I remember the last time how humiliating it was. They treated it as if I had brainwashed David and was holding him captive! For a while, I felt like I was the monster they said I was."

"So you know what I mean," Roger said.

"Yeah... in spades!" I answered. "But Rog, I have a feeling that I can do this. I'm setting boundaries and observing them. Kenny is, too. When we were at the movie today, he was rubbing the inside of my thigh, but he stayed away from my stuff - the same for when we were showering this morning. I just hope I can have another chance."

"Well, you know you're not going to get one from the System. For this to come off, we're going to have to keep it quiet - very quiet - and be very lucky. And then it can only happen within strict limits," Rog said. "For example, how are you going to deal with keeping it quiet that you have two kids living here with you? How are you going to get them in and out of the house without people noticing? And, how are you going to deal with the need to work and care for them at the same time?"

I answered, "Well, I've found the automatic garage door opener to be a blessing. It let's me drive in and out without it being totally obvious that someone else is in the car. I think I can get both boys to stay out of sight from the neighbors. If I impress upon them the absolute necessity not to go outside when they're here, I think they'll cooperate."

"I think getting your car windows tinted would be a good thing to do," Roger suggested. "Then, when they ride in your car, they have to stay in the back seat."

"Great idea, Rog! I'll arrange for it on Monday," I said. "As to my working, I could handle more work from home - I already do a lot here. As long as I'm in the office for editorial meetings, it should work out okay. I could explain to my boss that I have to care for my nephew for a while because my brother and sister-in-law are having a tough time with their marriage and it's having an effect on the boy. I think she'd be okay with that. And, I shouldn't have to mention Rusty.

"Also, for the days that I have to be in the office all day, the boys could stay over at Rusty's until I get home. Or, I could pick them up from there. You're providing medical care, so that should get me past having to have some sort of temporary custodial designation for Kenny. And as for Rusty, I think his mom will cooperate."

Roger grinned, "And, DO you have a brother and nephew?"

I smiled. "Brother, yes; nephew, no. Although, you never can tell when my sister-in-law might get pregnant! They don't have much to do with me ever since the incident and my imprisonment."

"Speaking of custodian rights," Rog mused, "I think that if we played our cards right, we could get Kenny's old man to sign off his claim to them."

My eyebrows went up. "Oh? How's that?"

"Peter has a friend who has a friend who works in child services. He'd have to check with this guy, but I think that if we can sound as though we could make a strong legal case about the sexual abuse, we could get his father to agree to just about anything to stay out of prison. My lawyer could help with the legal aspects of sounding threatening. And perhaps Peter's contact could give us some guidance."

I was stunned. For the first time I saw a real chance of actually being able to continue to care for Kenny - legally and with permission. But, what about my record? Nah, it would never work. Someone in the System would have to approve me and that would mean that they would discover my record. Well, maybe I could keep the situation under wraps and avoid attracting attention in the neighborhood as I'd done so far. A thrill went through me again as I thought that maybe, just maybe, I could pull this off.

Roger said, "It sounds like you have the major bases covered, my friend. The thing that worries me most is keeping the boys off the streets. I get the feeling that it will be more of a problem for Rusty than for Kenny. Do you have any thoughts on that?"

"I agree with you about Rusty," I answered. "I have a feeling that there's more to his situation than meets the eye. It's like he seeks out pain, even though he protests loudly. I don't know how to handle something like that. I'm not sure you do, either."

Roger shook his head no.

"Do you have any buddies in psychiatry - someone who's one of us?" I queried.

"I'll have to think about it, Jim," Roger answered. "I should be able to come up with somebody if we need to go there."

"Right now, I'm more concerned about how to recognize signs that Rusty needs professional help than anything else," I said. "And, besides all that, I just have one more question."

"What's that?" Rog asked.

"How th' hell did you know to be here JUST when we needed you?"

"Hmm. Interesting question..." Rog pondered. "I think I was mostly interested in checking up on my new patient, Master Davis."

"Mostly?" I asked.

"Yeah..."

"And what would be the other part?" I pressed.

Rog grinned. "Let's just say that I suddenly got very thirsty and Peter and I are out of beer!"

"Yeah, right," I said. "And bears don't shit in the woods! You're going to have to do better than that, my friend."

"Oh," Rog answered. "I guess so. Well, we'll get into that later. Right now, let's have a go at dialing up Mrs. Rusty. It's getting late enough that she may be wondering just where is her darling boy."

"You're right. I'll go get his telephone number. Meanwhile, you might open us another couple of beers."

"Now you're talking!" Rog was grinning again as I headed back to see how the guys were doing.

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