Big Bro, Little Bro
by Rob Warr
Chapter 6
"Joey," Zak said after a while. They'd finished their snack and were laying side by side, recovering from their earlier session and contemplating what came next.
"Uh huh?" Joey said rolling onto one side and giving Zak a big smile.
God he is so cute, Zak thought, he almost looks like Jake if I close my eyes a little. Then it dawned on him just how much Joey did look like Jake, and it was if his eyes were opened for the first time. He was looking for someone to replace Jake, someone who looked like him, and Joey had been that person. But there was more. He really liked Joey. He was sweet and sexy, and he treated him nice, and well...that only made it harder to make a decision.
"There's something I have to tell you."
"Oh, what is it?" Joey could see from the look on Zak's face that something was wrong and it sent a cold chill down his spine.
"Something happened...at the lake...with Jake..."
"What do you mean?" Joey asked, but he was pretty sure he wasn't going to like what he heard.
"We...well, we kissed. It was sort of an accident," Zak stuttered, then quickly he went on to explain how he'd tripped and how Jake had caught him and how that had led to the kiss.
"Oh, well...does that mean, ummm...that you still like him that way?"
Zak sighed, "I gotta be honest, I never stopped liking him that way, not even when we weren't speaking to each other, but I never knew how he felt about me till today."
"So...what does that mean for us? Are you gonna break up with me?" Joey said, looking ready to cry.
"No. I've thought about it and that wouldn't be right. First of all, I really, really like you...maybe even love you. And two, I could never hurt you that way. It wouldn't be fair and it wouldn't be right. I can't just forget my feelings for you because Jake suddenly decided he feels that way about me."
"But you want to be with him...don't you?" Joey said softly, hoping against all odds that Zak loved him more than he loved Jake.
"Not if it means hurting you or messing up what we have. Now that we've, you know..." Zak blushed, "done stuff...my feelings for you are even stronger."
"Yeah, I feel the same way too," Joey said, relaxing a little. Maybe he could keep Zak after all. But who was he kidding? This thing with Jake would always be hanging over their head, and the fact that the two lived in the same house, and shared a room...well, that would make it even tougher to deal with.
"So, I just wanted you to know cause I don't want there to be any secrets between us. The kiss was unexpected, and at first I guess it sort of threw me off and I wasn't thinking right, but after we did what we just did...well, I see things differently now. So, don't worry...I want to be with you, but I just had to tell you what happened."
"I don't know what to say. I believe you, but I'll still worry. I know you two have always been close, and now you sleep in the same room and...well, what if he tries something? Will you be able to resist him?"
"Yeah, I've thought about that and...I've decided that maybe we shouldn't share a room anymore. There's an attic room that's empty and one of us can move into it."
"Won't your folks wonder what's going on if you do that?"
"Well, we can just say that we're older now and need our own space or something. After all Carlos has his own room, why not us?"
"You've sure thought a lot about this, haven't you?"
"Yeah, I sort of had to think fast though, and well...I haven't told Jake what I've decided...so it may be sort of weird till I do."
"I don't know. It's really scary for me, but I guess I have to trust you. But promise me one thing: if you change your mind, or if anything else happens you'll tell me and not lead me on. If we gotta break up I'd rather do it now than later and be even more hurt."
"I won't cheat on you, I promise. And I promise if things change, you will be the first to know," Zak said scooting closer and snuggling into the boy's smooth naked body, "I love you, and I want to be with you."
"I...I love you too, but I'm not sure I can share you."
"You won't have to, not like that anyway. Oh sure, Jake is my brother and we live in the same house, but there doesn't have to be anymore to it."
"What if he doesn't agree?"
"It's not his choice, it's mine. He had his chance and he blew it," Zak said sounding almost angry.
"So, you're using me to get revenge on him, is that it?"
"No," Zak said softening, "I just won't let him come between us, not now, not ever. If you want to see where this thing with us goes, then I'll give it everything I have."
"I...I guess I'm willing to try," Joey said sighing, "just don't hurt me...okay?"
"I'll try my best," Zak said kissing him gently, "and I'm sorry that this happened, but maybe it was a good thing, cause now I know for sure where my heart is, and right now...it's with you."
Joey smiled for the first time since the conversation had started and threw his arms around Zak, "And my heart is yours."
They kissed deeply and passionately and the inevitable happened, and soon their hard naked flesh was pressed together. Zak rolled on top of Joey as their hard boy parts pressed together and they continued the kiss. The feel of naked flesh on flesh had all their senses heightened and soon they were panting and thrusting against one another, their impending orgasm fastly approaching.
"Oh, this feels so good..." Zak moaned between kisses.
"I...I...I'm coming..." Joey gasped.
Suddenly Zak felt Joey's warm wetness against his body and that was all it took to push him over the edge. As their boy seed spread, cementing them together with gooey love, they kissed once more and rode out another intense orgasm.
"Ummm...that was even better than the first one," Joey panted as he basked in the afterglow.
"Yeah, I think we're getting better at it, by the time the weekend is over we should be experts," Zak said grinning.
"Did you hear that?" Jake said sitting up suddenly.
"What?" Carlos said jerking out of a half sleep.
"I heard moaning. Do you think?"
"I told you that was probably going to happen. After all, they are lovers...for now."
"That should be me over there," Jake sighed.
"Yeah, well...your timing is a little off, but I think eventually you'll get there."
"I...I need to go for a walk or something," Jake said getting up on his knees.
"Want some company?"
"No, I just need some time to think."
"Okay, but don't go far, okay?"
"Okay, I promise."
Carlos watched Jake crawl out of the tent and zip the flap back up behind him, then he shook his head in dismay and tried to go back to sleep, unfortunately the moaning next door had gotten louder. He was certainly glad they had placed the tents well away from the cabin, because there was no mistaking what those moans meant.
"Did you hear that?" Joey said as he lay in Zak's arms recovering from his second orgasm of the evening.
"Mmmm...what?"
"Someone is out there...outside the tent," Joey whispered, looking terrified, "What if it's a serial killer or a bear?"
Zak laughed, "You been watching too many movies. Probably Jake or Carlos went to pee or something."
"Oh, yeah, maybe..." then suddenly Joey cried out as someone called from just outside the tent door.
"You guys done?" It was Jake's voice and Joey relaxed a little, but his fear was suddenly replaced by dread.
"Uh, what?" Zak said blushing.
"Can I come in?"
Zak looked at Joey and shrugged, "Just a minute," he said, rolling over and grabbing his shorts and then handing Joey his. When they had slipped them on, Zak crawled to the door and unzipped it.
"What's up? Is everything okay?"
"Yeah, I need to talk to you guys, that's all."
"Now?" Zak said, looking a little put out at Jake's intrusion.
"Yeah, I really think we need to talk right now. All three of us. First I need to talk to Zak alone though," he said looking over at Joey.
"It's okay, I told him," Zak said, giving Jake a nervous look. He wasn't eager to tell him the rest though.
"Oh, well...okay. So you know about the kiss...right?"
Joey nodded, "Yeah, he told me that he tripped and almost fell, and you caught him, and it just sort of happened."
"Well, yeah...I guess that's pretty close to what happened, only...only I wanted that kiss to happen. I've been wanting it for a long time, I just couldn't admit it till today."
"Took you long enough," Joey smirked. He was mad, and he intended to fight for Zak if he had to.
Jake raised an eyebrow, but he didn't try to defend himself, "I know...I was a jerk, and I hurt Zak, and then well...my mom got sick and then I moved in with Zak's family, and well...I just didn't see how it could possibly work, so I just sort of put it out of my mind...then the kiss happened," he sighed, "and now...now I can't think about anything else."
"It's not fair," Joey whined, "you didn't want him and then he found me and now we're together. You can't take him away from me."
"I know," Jake said sounding sad, "I would never do that. I like you Joey, I really do, and I think you and Zak make a cute couple. What I came here to say is...that I won't get in the way. I want you two to have a chance to see where things go...but, if it doesn't work out then I'll be here waiting."
"What if it works out and me and Zak fall in love and want to stay together forever?" Joey said smugly.
"I don't know. I only know I love Zak right now, but who knows what might happen later? I might meet a girl and fall in love, or a boy...I just don't know. Now that I know I can love freely and not be hung up on all that gay or straight stuff...I feel like anything can happen."
"Jake..." Zak began, then he looked at Joey and swallowed hard, "I can't promise anything. I've told Joey about the kiss and what happened because I didn't want there to be any secrets between us. I made a promise to him that we'd be together and see where this all goes. I love you Jake, but I love Joey too, and I intend to keep that promise I made to Joey."
"I understand. I guess I'll go now, I just couldn't stand not knowing what was going on. I want us to be together, but I don't want to hurt either of you...so, like I said, I'll wait. If it works out, I'll forget about it I guess, but if it doesn't, then I'm gonna try to convince you to give me a try."
"Joey? Are you okay with that?" Zak asked, taking his hand and giving it a gentle squeeze.
"I guess I don't have a choice. I mean, you've both been honest with me, but I gotta tell ya', I'm still gonna worry sometimes. I mean you live in the same house and you see each other every day. How can I compete with that?"
"You can't, and you won't have to," Jake said firmly, "I won't sneak around and I won't temp Zak to do it either. I meant it when I said I liked you Joey, and I don't want to hurt you like I hurt Zak. I'm sorry this happened when it did, but I can't take it back. I hope we can still be friends Joey, but I won't kid you, if you mess up...then all bets are off and I'm going after Zak."
"Fair enough I guess. I guess I'll have to trust you...both of you."
"I won't hurt you Joey," Zak said putting an arm around the boy, "I promise."
"Well, sorry to barge in on you guys. I know you wanted tonight to be special, and I hope I haven't spoiled it, although from the moaning I heard earlier...probably not," he said, teasing them despite the seriousness of the situation.
"You...uh...heard us?" Joey said blushing.
"Fraid' so, these tents are pretty thin and we're right next door..."
"What did Carlos say?" Zak asked grinning, "I bet I hear about it when I see him again."
"He's cool with it. Well, I should go. I told Carlos I was going for a walk, but I just couldn't leave things the way they were. Well, goodnight guys."
"Nite bro," Zak said smiling.
"Nite Jake," Joey said, "and thanks for being honest with me...with us."
"No prob...see you guys in the morning," he said as he let himself out, then zipping the tent back up he left them to deal with all that had been said.
"Have a nice walk?"
"Uh, actually I went next door and had a talk with Joey and Zak."
"Oh, how'd that go?" Carlos asked, showing no surprise at all.
"Pretty well...I think. I think we all know where we stand right now. I'm willing to let this thing with Zak and Joey run it's course, but if it doesn't work out, then I'm gonna go after Zak like he's never been gone after before."
"Wow, such passion. And how does Joey feel about all this?"
"Well, I think he knows he has to be on his toes and not mess things up with Zak, but I don't think he hates me, or worries too much about my stealing Zak away now."
"That's good, I guess. This whole thing is sort of complicated."
"Tell me about it, well...I think I'm gonna see if I can get some sleep now. Nite bro."
"Nite bro."
Jake laid down on his stomach and turned away from Carlos as he thought his thoughts and tried to relax enough to sleep. What was going on over there now? He wondered. Had his visit cooled things off, or had they gone back to...to whatever they had been doing earlier? How far had they gone, had they done the serious stuff? He frowned. Had they gone all the way? No, surely not. It was too soon for that. Probably just some touching...maybe helping each other get off.
He sighed softly, suddenly aware of a stirring between his legs. That should be me over there, he thought bitterly. Joey is a lucky boy, but he better watch out cause I'm not gonna give up the boy I love. That he could admit that to himself, that he loved Zak, surprised him at first, but then as he repeated it in his head he knew nothing had ever been clearer to him, or truer, and he couldn't help but smile. Then the smile faded as he realized that the boy he loved was laying in another boys arms at that very moment.
"I'm sorry, I didn't know he was gonna do that."
"It's okay. I'm sort of glad he did, cause now I know where we both stand. I won't have to worry so much about him sneaking around cause I already know what's going on, and he knows I know."
"Yeah, well...right now it's just you and me. Forget about him. Are you ready to sleep, or do you want to try some other stuff?" Zak said blushing.
"OH, well...I'm not really very sleepy...."
"Well, maybe after a little exercise we'll both sleep better," Zak said reaching down to find Joey was hard as a rock, "Oh, someone is glad to see me," he teased.
"Yeah, and it looks like yours is happy to see me too," Joey said returning the favor.
Jake woke early from what had been a fitful night's sleep and headed to the bathroom to relieve his aching bladder. At first there was no one there, but suddenly as he stood before the urinal watching is stream arch high before hitting the bowl, he heard a noise behind him and turned to see a boy about his age enter the bathroom.
He was dressed in loose fitting shorts and nothing else, barefooted, and...Jake had to admit, one of the cutest boys he'd ever seen. His dark eyes were accentuated by long lashes and thick brows and his long messy hair crowned a face that looked like it was right out of a Teen magazine.
"Hi," the boy said, his voice sweet and melodic, "I see I'm not the only one with morning wood."
Morning wood, Zak thought to himself, then he laughed, "Oh, yeah...hard to get the piss flowing sometimes."
Heading toward the stall and the toilet, the boy laughed, and a few minutes later he sighed as the unmistakable sound of piss hitting the water filled the air, "Ah, that's better. I must've drank six beers last night."
Six beers? So the boy was older, maybe even 18. Probably part of that bunch they'd seen the day before, the group with the girl in the white bikini.
"Oh, well...I didn't drink any beer, but I did drink a lot of soda," Jake said, then frowned as he thought how lame that sounded.
"I don't usually drink beer, but see, some kids I know, well...they had this lake party and man..did we get wasted."
"Was that your group I saw yesterday? There was a girl in a white bikini..."
"Yeah, that was Cindy. She's cool. Her brother Greg is like my best friend, so I've known her forever."
Not hot, not sexy...just cool. So apparently he wasn't interested in her that way.
"I'm Jake," Jake said shaking off the last few drops, relieved that his morning wood was fastly disappearing.
"Oh, shit...I'm Shaun, with an AU and not a W," he chuckled.
"Glad to meet you Shaun with an AU and not a W," Jake joked.
"Ah, I see what you did there," Shaun laughed, "So, you're with some other boys, right? And your folks I guess?"
Jake was flattered that he'd noticed them enough to know that. "Yeah, my two brothers and a friend and our folks."
"Brothers huh, you all look so different."
He must've looked closely to notice that, Jake thought, "Well, we're all step brothers really." Then he found himself explaining how Carlos came to be adopted, then his own circumstances. By the time he had finished, the two had finished peeing and were washing up at the sink.
"Oh, man sorry to hear about your mom, but it sounds like you got a great family now. My mom and dad split up when I was 10, so it's been just me and my dad since then. I see her maybe twice a year, she lives in Florida now."
"So..um, how old are you anyway?" Jake asked drying his hands on his shorts.
"15, why? Do I look older?" Shaun asked looking serious.
"Naw, maybe... a little," Jake stuttered not sure what the boy wanted to hear, "I'm 15 too, so it's hard to judge."
"Oh, cool...way cool. Hey, wanna hang out later. My friends are going out on Cindy's folks' boat, but I really don't want to. I was gonna just chill and swim maybe."
"Uh, yeah...that would be cool. Uh, I guess I better get back now though."
"Oh, yeah...me too. Why don't you meet me down at the lake about one. They're going right after lunch."
"Okay, sure...see ya then," Jake said blushing. What was it about this boy that caused him to feel so awkward and embarrassed?
"Great, well...see ya' later dude," Shaun said grinning, then as quickly as he'd appeared he was gone.
"What was that all about?" Jake asked his reflection in the mirror, then shaking his head he went back to see if the others were up.
Carlos was just crawling out of their tent stretching and yawning, but so far the other two showed no signs of stirring. Jake supposed they might be tired after a long night of...of whatever, and he felt his smile fading as he thought about the two naked and making love.
"You're up early."
"Had to pee. I met someone...a boy...Shaun and we're gonna hang out later. Is that okay?"
"Why are you asking me?" Carlos laughed, "Ask mom and dad. You don't need my approval. So...tell me about this boy," Carlos said, reading something in Jake's face and demeanor that probably wouldn't have been obvious to someone who wasn't as close to the situation.
"He's cool...he's my age. His friends are going out on a boat and he doesn't want to go, so we're just gonna swim and hang out. That's all."
"Okay, sounds great. I guess we can spare you for a while. I'm sure Zak and Joey won't mind. Might take some of the heat off things."
"You could come too I guess..."
"Naw, you go...have some fun. Nothing wrong with making a new friend."
Eventually the need to pee drove Joey and Zak out of their tent and as they passed Jake and Carlos there was no mistaking the tent in their shorts. After muttering a quick good morning, they headed off to the bathroom and minutes later Mr. and Mrs. Mason appeared on the back porch and called to the boys.
"Did we lose two of you?" Mr. Mason teased.
"Naw, Joey and Zak are in the bathroom," Carlos said cheerfully, "what's for breakfast? I'm starving."
By the time the other two boys returned, Mrs. Mason had breakfast started, and while they waited, the boys gathered at the picnic table out back and discussed their plans for the day.
"Let's all go swimming after breakfast," Zak suggested.
"Okay, but I have plans later," Jake said casually.
"Oh, like what?" Zak asked trying not to sound too bothered by that factoid.
"Just meeting a friend. We're gonna hang out, that's all."
"I didn't know you knew anyone here..."
"We just met, this morning, in the bathroom," Jake said letting that hang in the air before going on, "We both had to pee real bad, and we were talking, and I found out he's my age, and he's part of that group with the girl in the white bikini," he said grinning.
"Oh, so...are you gonna hang out with her too?" Zak asked trying to sound uninterested.
"Naw, the rest of his friends are going out on a boat and he didn't want to go...so we're just gonna swim and hang out."
"OH, well...that sounds like fun. You can invite him to hang out with us if you want, right guys?"
"Yeah, that's cool," from Joey.
"I think Jake wants to hang out with his new friend alone," Carlos said, knowing full well that Zak was feeling a tinge of jealousy.
"Oh, well...that's cool. Me and Joey and Carlos can hang out then."
After a breakfast of scrambled eggs, fried potatoes, bacon, and biscuits with butter and jelly, the boys helped clean up the mess then grabbed their swimsuits and retired to their tents to slip them on.
"Think Jake likes this new boy?" Zak asked Joey as they dressed.
"Does it matter?" Joey said sounding a little miffed, "It might be good if he found someone to like...since he can't have you."
"Yeah, that's what I meant. It would be cool if he found someone and we could like...double date or something," he said trying to turn it into a joke.
"You're not fooling me Zak," Joey said stiffly, "You're worried that Jake might find someone else, aren't you?"
"NO...of course not. I have you, I don't care what he does..."
Joey sighed, "You know that's not true. Why don't you admit it? You love Jake and you always will. I know you don't want to hurt me, but I'm not sure I can do this..."
"What do you mean?" Zak said reaching out to touch Joey gently.
"I'm not sure I can compete with him, that's all. You've loved him a lot longer than you've loved me and he's right there in your face everyday."
"I told you..."
"I know what you both said, what you promised, but that doesn't stop how you feel. Even if you don't give in to...to temptation, you will always have those feelings. And eventually...well...you might start hating me cause I'm keeping you from him."
Zak was surprised at how candid and perceptive Joey had become all of a sudden, but he wasn't about to admit that what he was saying might be true.
"Look, Joey...stop worrying. Did I act like I was thinking about Jake last night while we were...you know?" he said blushing, "NO, cause I was making love to you...not Jake. I'm sorry if I acted like I was more interested in what Jake was up to than you. In fact, it might be better if he found someone. I just wanted to make sure he wasn't doing this to try to make me jealous or something."
"Okay," Joey said giving in easier than Zak had feared he would, "but like I said, if it ever gets to the point that you want him more than me, please...please...let me know so I don't get hurt too bad."
"I promise, now let's go swimming and maybe we can do a little grab ass while we're out there."
"As long as it's just my ass," Joey said grinning.
The walk to the lake was filled with excited laughter and everyone seemed to be in good spirits. Jake was looking forward to meeting Shaun later, but he couldn't really understand exactly how he felt about this new boy yet. It was as if they'd been attracted to each other at first sight, and though he didn't think it would lead to more than just them being friends, he was looking forward to seeing how that played out. He realized he didn't even know where the boy lived. Did he live in his town or was he visiting from somewhere else? All these things he hoped to find out when they met later, and he was looking forward to learning the answers.
By lunch time the boys were tired and ready for some food and Mr. Mason had grilled polish sausages and chicken wings and the boys dug in hungrily. There was coleslaw and baked beans, but Jake passed on the beans. After all he didn't want to start farting while he and Shaun were swimming.
Zak noticed Jake's thoughtful look, and when he smiled he wondered what his newest step brother was thinking about. Was it about this new boy, this Shaun kid? He tried to convince himself that it didn't matter, that it was for the best, but deep inside he was worried. Worried that Jake might find someone to replace him and he'd never get the chance to be with him. That was silly, he decided, he had Joey and he shouldn't be thinking that way. But he couldn't change how he felt and he knew he'd have to be careful not to show those true feelings.
"Thanks for lunch mom...dad," Jake said excusing himself after eating only a small plate, "If it's okay I'm going to meet a new friend and go swimming over at the big campsite."
"Oh, is this someone you met here?" Mr. Mason asked curiously.
"Yes sir, we met this morning. He's one of those kids we saw yesterday down at the lake. His other friends are going out on a boat and he didn't want to go so we're gonna swim and hang out...if it's okay."
"Well, I don't see why not," Mr. Mason said helping himself to another sausage, "What time will you be back?"
"Uh, not sure...by supper time for sure," he said grinning.
"Well, be careful," Mrs. Mason added, "and you know the rules, no alcohol, or drugs, and no dangerous stunts."
"Yes ma'am," he said thinking about Shaun's admission that he had been drinking the night before. Would he want to drink beer today? And if so would he expect him to drink too? Well, he could say no gracefully, he was sure of that, but what would his folks say if they knew Shaun was drinking?
"If you want you can come join us later," Carlos offered, "we're gonna do some fishing and swim some more."
"Oh, okay...I'll see what he wants to do. We might see ya' later."
Jake stopped at the bathroom long enough to pee and wash up, then he primped a minute in the mirror and smiled. He knew he was being silly, it was just two guys hanging out and there was nothing to worry about. So why was he suddenly so self conscious, with a tummy full of butterflies?
"Hey," Shaun said looking up from his perch on a rock near the lake's edge.
"Hi, your friends already gone?"
"Yeah, that's them out there," he said waving to a boat half way out in the lake. Someone waved back but Jake couldn't tell if it was a boy or a girl. He wondered if the girl he'd seen yesterday was wearing the same white bikini and that caused a stirring between his legs, confusing him more than ever. Was it possible he liked both girls and boys? Or was it just because he loved Zak so much that he was even attracted to another boy?
"You ever scuba dive?" Shaun asked as they waded out into the lake.
"Naw, have you?"
"Yeah, when I visited my mom in Florida last year. It was bitchin'. All that color and there were even sharks, but not the man eating kind."
"Wow, that sounds cool. So your mom must be pretty cool then."
"Yeah, she's cool, her and Brandy. Brandy is mom's wife," he said looking at Jake to gage his reaction.
"OH, so you have two moms?" Jake said grinning, "that must be cool."
"Yeah, it is," Shaun said relaxing then, "some kids freak over it, but I can tell you're a cool dude."
"My step-brother is gay," he blurted out before he could stop himself, "So...that stuff doesn't bother me."
"Which one?" Shaun said acting interested.
"Whoa, he has a boyfriend," Jake chuckled.
"Oh, shucks...too bad," Shaun giggled.
So did that mean he was gay and interested, or was he just being funny? How could he find out without sounding too interested? Jake wondered.
"Yeah, he came out to me when he turned 13 and I sort of freaked at first. We weren't brothers then, just good friends. I didn't become his brother till a little over a year later."
"Why'd you freak?" Shaun asked sounding concerned, "I mean you seem like a super cool guy."
"Well...cause he kissed me and told me he loved me..." No way had he planned on sharing all this with this stranger, but his mouth seemed to be running on without regard to what his heart or his head thought, "I guess I was worried someone might think I was...you know...?"
"Gay? You can say it," Shaun said sounding annoyed.
"Yeah, gay. You know, I had a rep and, well...I just didn't understand things back then."
"But you do now?"
"Oh, sure. We made up and we're not only best friends again, we're brothers."
"Does he still feel that way about you?"
"I...well, yeah...he does, but he has Joey now so that put an end to that."
"For him or for you?"
"What do you mean?"
"I can see it in your eyes when you talk about him...you love him don't you?"
"Of course I do, he's my bro now."
"But you love him in a different way, don't you?"
"How...how can you know that?" Jake said, his voice shaky as fear overcame him.
"Cause I loved someone like that once and I know what it's like. It's scary, but it's also the most wonderful feeling in the world...until things go wrong."
"What happened in your case?"
"You sure you wanna know?"
"Yeah, I do. I've told you a lot about me, now I wanna' hear about you."
"Well, his name was Donnie, and he was a year older than me. I was 13 then and he was 14. We met at a party one of my friends had and we like hit it off instantly. I wasn't even sure I was gay at the time, but I had feelings for Donnie that I couldn't understand.
I was going through puberty about then and you know what that's like?" he laughed, "so I was beatin' off all the time and most of the time I was thinking about Donnie while I was doin' it. We'd Skype sometimes and my hand would be busy down there where he couldn't see, but one time I guess he figured out what I was doin' and he called me on it.
I was so embarrassed till he told me he was doin' it too. Well, the next time we were together we talked about things, and I found out he was feeling the same way I was. I had never been so happy in my life."
"So did you start doing stuff together then?"
"Not right away, but eventually. We were both sort of shy, and well...we hadn't even seen each other naked or anything. Then one night I slept over at his house and everything changed. We took a shower together to break the ice and if I hadn't already been in love, seeing his beautiful body would have done it for me.
He was Amer-Asian and his body was smooth except for a little hair down below and under his pits. He wasn't all that well hung, then neither was I, but that didn't matter. Oh, and he was uncut, which I thought was so cool.
Well, we progressed to kissing and then well...you know...from there it was anything goes. I mean we didn't do the big thing...not till a lot later, but we did everything else. We were happy and in love, and having sex every chance we got, then...well...we got stupid and we got caught.
His dad was this big hairy type that thought homosexuals were the worst thing on earth, and he kicked me out of his house and told me never to come back. He called my dad, but my dad was cool and read him the riot act, and said that what we did was our business, but it didn't matter. I wasn't allowed to see Donnie again and my life felt like it was over.
"That's awful, but at least your dad is cool with you being gay."
"Oh, I'm not gay," Shaun said frowning, "I'm Bi."
"Oh, okay," Jake said meekly, "So what happened with your friend?"
"His dad was ex-military and had guns all over the house..." Shaun paused a moment to compose himself, then continued in a shaky voice, "and one day after Donnie and his dad had a big fight...he grabbed one of his dad's guns and shot himself," Shaun said in a soft voice filled with emotion, "He lived till they got him to the hospital, but the bullet had entered his brain, and even if he'd lived he would never have been the same."
"I'm so sorry," Jake said unable to hide the tremble in his voice.
"Yeah, it sucked. His dad took it pretty hard and started drinking, and one night he got in a wreck coming home from this bar and he died too."
"Donnie's mom was from Vietnam and she moved back there to be with her folks after Donnie's dad died."
"That's just so...so sad," Jake said wiping at his eyes, "it makes what happened with me and Zak seem almost stupid. I wish I had reacted differently. I hurt him a lot and I will never be able to make up for all that lost time..."
"At least you have a chance to try. I won't ever see Donnie again. I loved him a lot, and I will never forget what we had or how we felt about each other."
Jake couldn't resist the urge to slip an arm around his new friend and Shaun didn't seem to mind, in fact he actually scooted a bit closer and laid his head on Jake's shoulder.
"Thanks for caring," Shaun said softly, "I wish I had a friend like you back at home."
"Hey, speaking of that, where do you live, what school do you go to?"
Jake was surprised to learn that Shaun lived in the same city as he and his brothers, but disappointed to learn that he attended another school, even though they only lived three miles apart.
"So you go to Kennedy huh? That's not that far away from where we live," Jake said thoughtfully, "I think the dividing line for the district is like real close to our house."
"Yeah, I know, I really wanted to go to McKinley, but Kennedy is pretty cool too."
"So...any interest in keeping in touch? I mean we could at least text."
"I'd like that, but I sort of don't have my phone right now," Shaun laughed, "It's not waterproof."
Jake laughed then and they agreed to exchange numbers later. After a refreshing swim they lay back on the rock and soaked up some sun as they dried off.
"So...this Zak kid. He and this other kid pretty tight?"
"Yeah, I guess so. I mean...especially after this weekend."
"Oh, you mean...?"
"Yeah, up till this weekend all they'd done was hold hands and kiss, but now...well, I don't think they've gone all the way yet, but pretty close."
"That bother you? I mean you admitted you have feelings for him. Isn't it hard to see him with another boy?"
"Well...it's not like I have a choice. Joey is a nice kid though and I don't want to see him get hurt."
"So you're willing to take the hurt instead?"
Jake shrugged, but Shaun's eyes were closed so he felt a need to answer instead, "Well...I deserve it really. I was a jerk and I got what I deserved. I could have had Zak a long time ago if I had just went with my feelings and not been a whiny-assed bitch."
Shaun laughed, "I don't see you that way. I think you're a cool dude who just had trouble dealing with his sexuality. I guess I really never had to deal with it quite that way. I just met someone, fell for him, and I didn't worry about whether he was a dude or a chick. I like both by the way."
"I dated a girl for a while, after the breakup. She was a frigid bitch," Jake laughed, "not even a handjob."
Shaun laughed, "Well, most girls aren't as comfortable with that stuff, but there are plenty of girls who like sex. I've been with a few."
"You ever...you know? Go all the way?"
"Naw, most girls want to save that stuff for Mr. Right or something," Shaun chuckled, "but I got some primo head and a few handjobs."
"I guess I might give girls another chance while I'm waiting for this thing with Zak and Joey to run it's course."
"You talk like you think they won't stay together all that long, or am I just reading things into your words that aren't there?"
Jake sighed, "I don't know. I don't even know what I want to happen. I mean in a way it's a relief to know I don't have to make a decision, that it's already been made for me, and in another...well, I wonder what I'm missing out on."
"The sex?"
"Not just the sex, the intimacy, the hand holding, the kissing, the snuggling. That kiss..." Jake sighed, "that kiss at the lake...it was ten times better than all the kisses Becca and I shared."
"That's what love will do for ya'," Shaun said smiling over at Jake, "Too bad though, if it was just the sex you were missing I coulda' helped ya' there."
Jake smiled back, "Sex is cool. You don't have to love someone to have sex, right?"
"Nope, it's best when you do, but sex is fun no matter what."
"Umm...where could we...um, go?"
"You sure about this?"
"Yeah, if you are," Jake said as his heart sped up a little.
"Come on, I know a place." Shaun said jumping up and offering Jake a hand up.
Jake had mixed feelings as he followed Shaun, but he was in too far to back out now. His little head was in control now, and like most teenage boys his age he was helpless to resist.
Shaun led Jake past a number of RV's and finally to a large two-room tent surrounded by four smaller tents.
"This is the tent I share with my buddies," Shaun said as he unzipped the tent door, "They won't be back for hours..."
Inside there were sleeping bags rolled out, pillows and clothes scattered here and there, and opened gym bags and backpacks piled in one corner. There was an ice chest and Shaun fished two sodas out of the icy water and offered one to Jake.
"Thanks, this is a big tent."
"Yeah, it's Larry's dad's, he lets us borrow it sometimes," Shaun said kicking off his flip flops and tugging at his damp trunks.
"Are we...getting naked?" Jake stuttered.
"Well, wasn't that the whole point of coming here? Have you changed your mind?" Shaun said pausing with his trunks just barely showing the start of his pubic patch.
"Nooo...no, I just wasn't sure if we were gonna talk first or something..." Jake said sitting his soda down and tugging at his trunks.
"I didn't know how you wanted this to go down. Do you want to kiss or hug or anything, or just get right to it?"
"I...um...all of that I guess," Jake said, more nervous than ever. What am I doing? he wondered, Just cause I can't have Zak does that mean I have to throw myself at the first boy that comes along?
"You okay? You look pale."
"I'm fine," Jake said, but he didn't feel fine.
"Look, dude if you don't want to do this, just say so. It's no big deal to me..."
"I...I'm just a little nervous. Except for Zak I've never been with a boy before, and that was when we were younger."
"Ah...well...let's start slow then," Shaun said closing the distance between them and putting his arms around Jake's waist, "Nice," he said staring down at Jake's erection.
"Uh, you too," Jake said blushing bright red. Can I really do this? Am I going to let my real first time be with someone I just met, someone I hardly know?
Suddenly Shaun leaned forward and their lips met. It was a brief tentative kiss, but halfway into it Jake's toe's were curling and his erection was throbbing harder. When Shaun broke off the kiss Jake pulled back and looked into his eyes and blushed.
"Well, did you like it?" Shaun chuckled.
"Yeah, it was nice. Can we do it again, and maybe hug a little closer?"
Shaun chuckled, "Oh yeah, I think the boy likes it."
The next kiss was more passionate, and as they pressed their boy parts together the level of passion increased. Jake's fears and inhibitions seemed to have vanished once the kiss began, and now he was looking forward to what might come next.
"You have nice lips," Shaun cooed, "and a nice one of these," he said reaching between them and wrapping his hand around Jake's erection.
"Oh, be careful," Jake warned, "No one but me has touched that thing for a while."
"Well, we could get the first one over with quick and then you'd last a bit longer the next time."
"I...I let me..." he said reaching down to return the favor, "there's something I always wanted to try. I mean I've done it before, but only with Zak and he was a lot smaller back then."
"Oh, well...I'm yours, have at it."
"Can we lay down, over there?" Jake said afraid his knees would buckle at any moment.
"Yeah, sure...get comfy. This is my sleeping bag over here by the wall."
Once Shaun was on his back Jake maneuvered until he was between his legs. Lowering his head he looked up long enough to make sure Shaun was okay with what he was about to do, and seeing the look of excitement and anticipation on Shaun's face he continued.
"It's a lot bigger than Zak was back then, but I think I remember how..." he said softly as he grabbed onto Shaun's erection and held it in place.
"Well, your mouth is probably bigger too..." Shaun joked and Jake laughed and the tension was eased.
Jake started by licking the head of Shaun's cock and was relieved to find that it not only wasn't unpleasant to the taste, but actually tasted good. Encouraged by that fact he lowered his head a bit and allowed an inch or so of Jake's rock hard cock into his mouth.
"Ummm...so far you're doing just fine," Shaun moaned softly.
Jake grunted a thanks, but didn't let it stop his assault on Shaun's steel hard pole. Inch by inch he lowered himself onto the hot hard rod that was Shaun's cock until the tip of it just grazed his throat. He gagged once, then pulled back a little, and mentally prepared himself before attempting to swallow all of it again. This time he succeeded in taking the whole thing, and worked his throat muscles just like he used to do with Zak.
It was Zak who taught him all that he knew about boy sex, and though that had seemed like ages ago, he had learned well, and it was all coming back to him.
"Holy shit man, you deepthroat," Shaun panted, "you sure this is your first time?" No, don't answer, just keep doin' what you're doin'." he added quickly as Jake sped up a little.
For the next five minutes Jake practiced his deep-throating skills, but found his throat was getting a little sore. Pulling off some, he began working Jake's cock with his hand as he bobbed up and down on it using his lips and tongue to stimulate the sensitive ridge of the head.
"Oh..dude, you get an A in dick sucking," Shaun panted, "but unless you want a mouthful of boy cream you better...oh...shit...too late...dude....ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit."
If there was one thing that Zak had taught him, it was that to spit was rude, and so with no thought to how much more spunk a 15 year old could produce than a 12 year old, Jake gave it his all and let the damn burst in his mouth.
At first he was amazed at the force with which the first squirt hit the back of his throat and he almost choked on it. Then pulling up a little he used his tongue to absorb the impact of the next couple of blasts and finally got it under control. Eventually he managed to swallow it all down, and when all that was left was a slow ooze he pulled up and looked at Shaun.
Shaun's eyes were closed, but the look on his face and the satisfied smile on his lips said it all.
Jake licked his lips and decided the taste was very much like his own. Yes, like most boys he'd been curious about what his own spunk tasted like, and on more than one occasion had licked his hand clean. He remembered the first time he had actually tasted Zak's thin watery cum and it brought a whirlwind of images with it. Zak naked laying on his bed, giggling as Jake tickled him with a feather, Zak hovering over him as they stared into each others eyes, their hard boy parts pressing together.
How could I have not known back then that Zak and I were more than just friends? We'd acted like lovers even before we knew what that meant. Zak knew, he realized, he knew from the start, but it was me who was confused. And now...now, what do I want? Can I really be someone's boyfriend? Can I be Zak's boyfriend? Well, not as long as Joey is around, he sighed to himself.
"Uh, dude...you look kind of spaced out. Are you okay?"
"I'm fine," Jake said pulling out of his funk, "I was just digesting your spunk. Dude do you always come that much?"
"I tried to warn you," Shaun chuckled, "You were like a vacuum cleaner toward the end. Man, I haven't had an orgasm like that in a long time."
"Glad to help out."
"So, where did you learn that? From that kid Zak?"
"Yeah," Jake said sitting back on his haunches, "Crazy huh. At the time it was just fun, you know?"
"Only it wasn't just fun for him, was it?"
"No, it was serious stuff for him," Jake said staring straight ahead, "and I guess if I'd been honest with myself, I sort of felt that way too. We has sex, we snuggled, we...laid in bed naked holding each other and talked for hours. We...we acted like a married couple, but when Zak called me on it...I ran. I ran like a frightened rabbit."
"Dude, you are so not over this boy. How can you even think about letting this other kid have him?"
"I...I don't have a choice. I guess I just thought that if I came clean with Zak he'd drop Joey like a hot potato, but reality set in pretty quick. I wish, I wish I'd never kissed him and told him how I felt."
"Dude, come here," Shaun said opening his arms.
At first Jake was hesitant to accept comfort from his new friend, but sighing, he finally moved into his embrace.
"You did what your heart told you to do, and that's never wrong. This will all work out eventually, but in the meantime, relax and have some fun," Shaun cooed as he pulled Jake's back against his chest.
Then wrapping his arms around Jake's slender waist he hugged him tight, "You're a real fox, you know that?"
"Um, thanks, you too." Jake said relaxing even more and leaning back into Shaun.
"And you give a great beejay," he said nuzzling Jake's ear, "and now I am gonna return the favor."
"Oh, well...okay," Jake said, as his cock visibly throbbed between his legs.
"Mmmm...you smell good," Shaun said reaching around to grab Jake's erection, "Oh, what's this?"
"My joystick," Jake teased.
"Well, I like this game," Shaun laughed as he tried out Jake's joystick.
"Careful, you'll use up all my lives," Jake laughed, and Shaun joined in.
"Okay, lay back and let me get at that thing. I hope you come lots, cause I love that taste."
Once on his back Jake pulled a pillow beneath his head and closed his eyes. When he felt Shaun's warm breath on his privates he sighed, and a second later his cock was enveloped by Shaun's warm wet mouth.
If Jake's prowess as a cocksucker could be graded an A, then Shaun's must surely be an A++. Of course besides Zak no one had ever given him this kind of pleasure, but it was obvious from the start that not only was Shaun very good at it, but that he was totally into it.
When Shaun reached down and began gently fondling his balls, Jake groaned as he felt his orgasm fastly approaching. Then just when he thought things couldn't get better, Shaun let his middle finger trace a path from his balls to his tacky boy pucker. He didn't try to penetrate that virgin starfish, but instead just rubbed it gently as he bobbed up and down in increased fervor.
"OH...shit...here it comes..." Jake warned, "I hope you're ready...."
Shaun grunted as the first volley hit his tongue and for the next few minutes he was busy greedily gobbling down Jake's tasty boy juice.
"Oh, man...that was awesome," Jake said, panting when it was all over.
"You taste really good dude," Shaun said licking his lips.
"Thanks, I guess," Jake laughed, "And definitely thanks for...you know, the beejay."
"My pleasure," Shaun said crawling up to lay by Jake. Then after a few seconds he rolled toward him and placed a hand on his chest, "Is it okay if I kiss you?"
"Yeah, sure," Jake said going with his feelings and putting Zak and everything else out of his mind for the moment.
The kiss was wet and passionate, a swapping of spit and cum, and both boys were breathless when it was over. Shaun sighed contentedly as he let his head fall to the pillow once more and he patted Jake gently.
"I could get used to this," Shaun sighed, "it's been a while since I was this close to someone, boy or girl."
"I can't promise anything," Jake said sadly.
"Oh, I know that, but I was thinking...till this thing with your friend and his boyfriend works it's self out, it wouldn't hurt if we got together and had a few laughs, right?"
"I suppose..." Jake said, unsure of how he felt about the idea.
"You don't sound very excited about it," Shaun joked, "Are you worried about what Zak will think?"
"A little, but that's not the only reason," Jake said reaching down to rub the top of Shaun's hand, "I like you a lot and I don't want to mess up your life like I messed up Zak's."
"Don't worry about me. I'm invincible," Shaun laughed, "I'm just in it for the fun. If I wanted to get serious I'd probably find a girl."
"Oh, okay," Jake said, not sure how he felt about that, "Well, then I guess we can give it a try."
Voices outside the tent interrupted them suddenly, and Shaun pulled away and began searching for his discarded swim trunks. Realizing they were in danger of getting caught, Jake grabbed his trunks and pulled them up quickly.
By the time the flap was unzipped and a tall black boy slipped inside they were dressed and Shaun was digging in the ice chest for more sodas.
"Oh, hey..." the new boy said as Jake looked him over.
He was about 2" taller than Jake and toned and fit looking. His skin was dark, but not ebony, more a rich mocha and his face was handsome, his eyes full of mischief and fun.
"Hey Larry, this is Jake, the dude I told you about."
"Oh, hey bro," Larry said offering a fist to bump, "Did I interrupt anything?" he chuckled.
"No, of course not," Shaun scoffed, "We were just getting a soda."
"With the door zipped up?" Larry laughed, "What's that smell? Smells like sex in here," he added, grinning as he wrinkled his broad nose.
"You're whack dude, probably your dirty jock strap," Shaun said laughing, sounding as if he was used to this kind of teasing.
"Okay, whatever you say. Well, at least this one is hot," he said digging a root beer out of the ice chest.
"Where's the others?" Shaun said changing the subject.
"They went with Cindy into town to get some more beer and stuff."
"Cindy is the girl in the white bikini," Shaun said giving Jake a smile, "Girl is hot as the fourth of July."
"Yeah, she's got some nice tits," Larry sighed, "and that azzz...."
"Down boy," Shaun teased, "you'll just get all hot and bothered and have to wind up squeezing the weasel like always."
"Unless I can talk you into helpin' a brother out," he laughed.
"I think I'm more than you could handle, better stick to your hand."
"One of these days..." he chuckled.
"Naw, you're too macho for that," Shaun said patting his friend on the back.
"Any mouth gonna' feel good. I could close my eyes."
"We'll continue this discussion later," Shaun chuckled, "right now Jake and I are gonna go swim some more, right Jake?"
"Yeah, definitely. Nice to meet you bro," Jake said bumping fists again.
"You too man, keep my boy here happy. I might just get lucky later," he laughed.
"In your dreams," Shaun laughed as they headed out the tent door.
"Sweet dreams," Larry laughed back.
"What was that all about?" Jake asked once they were out of earshot.
"Oh, he's always joking about wantin' head and stuff, but he's never got serious about it. Too bad cause the boy is hung like a pony."
"Sounded serious enough."
"Talk is cheap, when he whips it out and rubs it on my lips...then I'll know he's serious."
"Hmmm...but he knows you...um, that you're bi?"
"Oh yeah, all my friends do, and they could care less. I've fooled around with a couple of them, but nothing serious. You know kids today don't put a label on that stuff like they used to. If it feels good, do it. That's pretty much our motto these days."
"Makes sense to me," Jake said shading his eyes from the sun as he looked out at the lake, "So...this girl...Cindy. You ever been with her?"
"Naw, she's like a big sister to me. Like I said, her brother is my best friend and I've known them forever."
"So...how come you're not hanging out with your best friend today?" Jake asked grinning.
"Cause he ain't nearly as pretty as you," Shaun laughed as he slapped Jake on his fine rear end.
"Or as easy?" Jake chuckled.
"That too, boy has a no hands on policy when it comes to boys and sex. He's into the ladies, but he's cool with boys who dig boys....like me."
"That's good," Jake said as they reached the lake and waded in, "And this girl...Cindy, she's cool with it too?"
"Yeah, she thinks it's cool. She says we both have one thing in common, we like boys," he chuckled, "So we compare notes and she's pretty good at figuring out which boys like girls, and which like both, or boys only."
"That's cool."
"Yeah, I'm really lucky to have such cool friends, but hey, I'm a cool guy, so...it only stands to reason I attract cool people...like you," Shaun said swimming closer and reaching out to touch Jake's chest.
"Yeah, well...sometimes I don't feel so cool, but I'm glad you decided I was worth your trouble."
"Oh definitely, I'm still tingling from earlier. Hey, I was wondering....any chance you can sneak out later and meet me somewhere?"
"Just me and my step in the tent, but what about you, can you get away?"
"You kidding, that bunch is up and roaming around all night, they wouldn't even notice me being gone."
"Okay, yeah...what time and where?'
"Midnight, at the rock where we sunned today, and bring a towel. I thought we'd do a little skinny dipping while we were there."
"Okay, you're on," Jake said kicking off and swimming away.
Shaun waited a second then the chase was on. They swam and wrestled and played grab ass for a while, and then just floated side by side and talked softly.
Suddenly they heard voices and looking up they saw Zak and Joey approaching and Carlos was right behind them.
"Hey you guys," Zak said from the bank, "okay if we swim too?"
"Sure, come on in," Jake said, eying Shaun and shrugging.
"That must be lover boy," Shaun chuckled, earning him the stink eye from Jake.
After introductions were made, Zak and Joey kept pretty much to themselves, but Carlos stayed with the two while he and Shaun got better acquainted. After a while Carlos excused himself and swam away, swimming lazy laps to keep his body toned up.
"Wow, your brother Carlos is hot," Shaun said grinning, "if it don't work out with Zak, how about him?"
"He's my brother," Jake said not realizing how stupid that sounded.
"And Zak isn't?"
"Oh, well...yeah...I guess that's true, but it's different. I mean I don't love Carlos that way."
"So he's available?" Shaun said watching Carlos' lithe form as he turned to swim back their way.
"I think he likes girls," Jake said dumbly.
"Uh, so do I, remember? Doesn't rule out some fun."
"Hey, aren't I enough?"
"Sorry, don't get all jealous," Shaun teased, "I just like to look, and dream."
"I have to admit, I've wondered what it would be like...to be with him like that. He's older and really buff and well...he's a real fox."
"Yeah, imagine a three way with us three," Shaun said raising his eyebrows comically.
"God, I got to quit thinking about stuff like that," Jake said shaking his head, "I've only had real sex once and I'm already hooked."
"Yeah, it's like that. I remember the first time I fapped to orgasm, I was addicted for life, and then when I discovered there was more...well...let's just say...I'm a sex junkie."
"Yeah, well...I'm still worried I might get carried away and do something stupid."
"Like what? Have some fun, get your rocks off? Nothin' wrong with that dude."
"No, I guess not, but I just don't want Zak to think I'm out there having sex with every boy I meet."
"One, one boy...me. What's wrong with that?"
"Nothing I guess," Jake said as he watched Zak and Joey splashing about and hugging onto each other.
"They're a cute couple," Shaun said noticing where Jake was looking.
"Yeah, it happened kind of fast though and I always wondered, was it because Zak needed to find someone to get over me? I mean look at him, he almost looks like me."
"Yeah, I noticed," Shaun chuckled, "you two could be twins. If it doesn't work out with Zak and him, and you two get together, maybe I could get with Joey and soothe his hurt feelings," Shaun teased.
"Always planning ahead, aren't you?"
"Just sayin'," Shaun said, suddenly jumping Jake and wrestling him into the water. For a few minutes they were engaged in a playful game of dunk and grab ass and when Jake finally broke loose and swam away he noticed Zak seemed to be watching him intensely.
Was Zak jealous? He wondered. Well, too bad, he thought feeling a little mean, if he can have fun so can I.
"Hey Shaun, bet ya' can't catch me," Jake taunted watching Zak all the while to see how he would react.
"Grrrr...you're on turkey," Shaun said starting toward him, "and when I catch ya' I'm gonna pants ya'," he laughed.
This caused Zak to do a double take and his head nearly came off his shoulders as he turned to watch the two scuffle in the deeper water. It was too far and the water too deep for Zak to see anything below the surface, but from the way they were moving and scuffling it was obvious Shaun was making good on his threat, or at least trying to.
Then triumphantly Shaun suddenly cried out and holding Jake's trunks up high, "Boo ha, I got you good dude. Look everyone, Jake is skinny dipping now," he laughed.
"You guys..." Carlos scolded, but he was laughing.
"Just don't let anyone see you naked, you might get arrested," Zak said, then blushed.
"No worries, Shaun's gonna' give em' back, aren't ya' dude?"
"Maybe, or maybe you better come take em' back," Shaun taunted from where he drifted a few feet away.
That was all it took to get Jake moving, and soon he and Shaun were wrestling around again and eventually Jake managed to reclaim his trunks and held them up for the others to see.
"Now if I just don't drown trying to put them back on," Jake sputtered.
"I'll help ya' dude," Shaun offered, drawing a withering stare from Zak.
Who does he think he is? Zak fumed, He acts like he owns Jake. Then a sudden sickening feeling came over him. Was it possible the two had messed around? Naw, surely not, especially after the kiss and his confession of his feelings. Unless...he was trying to make him jealous, or simply trying to find someone to take his place since he was unavailable.
He watched with veiled hostility as Shaun helped Jake slip his trunks back on, barely aware of Joey who was watching him with sudden concern.
Was there something going on here that he didn't understand? Joey wondered. Who was this new kid anyway, and why was he and Jake so close already? And why was Zak looking like he was ready to jump the new kid and tear his head off when he got too close to Jake? Hadn't they worked all this out already"
"Shaun!" someone yelled from the bank.
"What's up Bill?" Shaun said swimming toward the tall teenage boy.
"We're all going to the movie in town, you coming?"
"Damn, I forgot about that," Shaun said to Jake, "I promised them I'd go dude. Sorry."
"Hey, no problem. Will I see you later?" he said quietly so the others couldn't hear.
"You bet, just like we planned. Catch ya' later dude," he said throwing Jake a killer smile. "Hey guys, it was nice meeting you. See ya' guys around, okay?" he said to the others.
Zak relaxed a little once Shaun was gone, and when he saw Jake climb out and sit down on a rock at the water's edge he wanted so badly to join him, but couldn't think of a way to do so without making Joey suspicious.
It was Carlos however who went to sit beside him, and for a minute or two they just sat there staring out at the water and collecting their thoughts.
It was Carlos who broke the silence at last, "Shaun seems nice and you two seem to have hit it off well."
"Yeah, he's a cool dude. He goes to Kennedy and lives pretty close to us, we exchanged numbers and stuff," he said quickly, then blushed. TMI, he thought.
"Oh, well...that's cool. Nothing wrong with making a new friend."
"Zak doesn't like him, does he?"
"What? Why would you say that?" Carlos asked, but he'd seen the same thing Jake had, and had come to the same conclusion.
"I could see it in his eyes. Oh, Carlos...I don't know what to do," Jake moaned.
"Bro, whatever Zak feels is his problem, not yours. You can't stop being yourself or having friends just cause' you think Zak doesn't approve. He's with Joey and he doesn't get to decide what's right for you."
"I know, I know," Jake lamented, "but I have to wonder...am I setting myself and everyone else up for a fall? I mean I told Shaun how it is and he says he's okay with things...but, really...you know how things can go wrong."
"I see, so you and Shaun....?"
Jake nodded, "I didn't mean to, but it was so...so good, and it felt so right, but now...now, I'm not so sure. Maybe I did it just because I couldn't have Zak, I don't know."
Carlos sighed, "You're old enough to decide what's right for you and what's not. I think maybe you worry too much. Sure, it's tough, but you can't just keep hanging on waiting for Zak. If it's meant to be, it will be, but meanwhile you have to live your life too."
"And what if Shaun like...I don't know, falls in love with me or something?"
"Do you think that's likely? I mean you've only just met, and after today...well, you probably won't see that much of each other."
"Yeah, you're right. Why would he fall for me," Jake grunted, "I'm a loser anyway."
"No, you're not a loser. You're a handsome and cool dude who's just had a rough time of working through his feelings. It will get better, meanwhile, don't be so hard on yourself."
"Let's get out," Joey said after awhile. Watching Zak watch Jake was irritating and he was tired of being ignored.
"Oh, okay," Zak said leading the way.
"You guys going back to the camp?" Carlos asked as the two waded to shore.
"Yeah, I am," Joey said stiffly, "it's no fun here anymore."
"What's up with him?" Jake asked when Joey was gone.
Zak shrugged, "Dunno, I guess I better go talk to him. See ya' guys later."
"Even Joey can see something is going on," Jake said when the two were out of sight.
"I worry about him most of all," Carlos sighed, "There is way too much drama in our house," he added laughing sadly, "Come on, let's call it a day."
Jake stayed out of Zak and Joey's way the rest of the day, and only saw them again at dinner time. Their dad had grilled burgers and they ate them with chips and potato salad as they sat around the picnic table engaging in light conversation.
Inevitably the subject of Jake's new friend came up, and though Jake was reluctant to say a lot, he couldn't avoid his parents questions altogether.
"So does this boy live near us, or just visiting?" Mrs. Mason asked.
"He uh actually lives pretty close to us, but he goes to Kennedy."
"Oh, that's nice. Are you boys going to stay in touch?'
Jake groaned to himself, and one look a Zak's face said he was anxious to hear the answer to that one too. Then suddenly, he thought to himself, I have nothing to hide, we're just friends. Jake has friends, Carlos has friends, why can't I have friends too?
"Yeah, we exchanged numbers and stuff and we're gonna try to hang out sometime."
"That's good. You can never have too many friends, but...we would like to meet this boy," his mom said giving Jake that look only a mother can.
"Oh, well...I'm not sure where he is right now, but I guess I can go see if he could stop by later."
"All right, if not you can always bring him by the house before you boys go off to...hang out," she laughed.
"What your mother means is: she wants to make sure this boy isn't a drug dealer, a thug, or a bad influence," Mr. Mason laughed.
"Oh, hush, I didn't mean anything like that. I just like to know the boys' friends, that's all, and hopefully their families."
"Its just Shaun and his dad," Jake said as all eyes turned to him, "His mom lives in Florida and is remarried." He didn't add that she was married to another woman however, since he wasn't sure how his folks would take that little factoid.
"Oh, then he could use some mothering," Mrs. Mason chuckled, "I bet he and I will get along just fine."
"Mom, you don't have to adopt all our friends," Zak said sounding annoyed, "they have their own families."
"So, I shouldn't love Joey like he was my own?" she said giving her youngest son a withering look.
"No, I didn't mean that..." Zak said turning his eyes to his half eaten burger.
"I thought you boys always liked the way we treated your friends and made them feel welcome," she added looking hurt now.
"We do mom," Carlos said smiling warmly, "I don't think Zak meant what it sounded like."
"Yeah, I like how you treat our friends," Jake said trying to ease the hurt his mom was feeling, "and I just know you'll like Shaun, he's a cool dude."
"You just met the guy, how do you know he's cool?" Zak blurted out, then seemed to wither as the others looked at him in shock.
"Uh, well...you know? Sometimes you just hit it off with someone right away, sort of like you did with Joey," Jake said, returning Zak's withering look.
"Oh, well...yeah, I guess," Zak said trailing off.
Zak was moody the rest of the meal, but there were no more outbursts or talk of Shaun, and only when he and Joey finally excused themselves to the bathroom did Mr. Mason address the elephant in the room, or in this case the elephant that had left the room, "What was that all about? That didn't sound like Zak at all. I would think he would be the first one to understand how easily kids can make friends. God knows he's brought home enough new kids over the years," he chuckled.
"I don't know. He almost seemed angry that Jake had made a new friend. Boys, is there something going on here that we don't know about?" the last part being addressed to Carlos and Jake.
"I don't know, maybe he's just tired or something," Jake lied, "he was fine earlier."
"Yeah, probably. Him and Joey been going at it pretty hard," Carlos said, then realizing how suggestive that sounded he backtracked, "I mean, swimming, running around all over the place, and probably staying up half the night talking and stuff."
"Well, I think he owes you an apology," Mrs. Mason said to Jake, "You've been a good friend and brother to him and you deserve to have some friends your own age."
"Maybe he's a little jealous," Mr. Mason said, but before anyone could gasp or start denying anything he continued, "He's had you all to himself for a while now, and maybe he sees Shaun as a threat to that brotherly comradery that you two share."
"Maybe, but that's silly. We're bros and we sleep in the same room," Jake laughed, trying to ease the tension.
"Yes, well...who knows what goes on in the mind of a teenage boy?" Mr. Mason chuckled, "I'm sure you boys will work it out though. You seem to know more about what's going on than us two old fogies.
"He'll be fine," Carlos assured him, "he's probably already forgotten about it by now."
"What the hell was that all about?" Joey demanded as soon as he and Zak were out of earshot of the others.
"What? I'm just saying...he doesn't know anything about this Shaun kid. He could be a druggy, or a hood, or something, and get Jake into trouble."
"Oh man, do you hear yourself? You are so jealous of this boy you can't think straight. Why do you care if Jake has a new friend? And who cares if they're messing around? You've got me, that's what you said. You said I was the only one who mattered. Well, I tell you what. When you really make up your mind, let me know, till then...I don't want to be around you." Then stomping off toward the lake, Joey left Zak standing there, his mouth hanging wide open in shock.
"Oh shit, what have I done?" he moaned as he grabbed his head and pulled at his hair. Then gathering his wits about him he went off to find Joey.
He found him sitting by the water's edge crying softly, and he felt like a complete and total ass. Why did things have to be so hard? Why couldn't he just be happy with things the way they were, and not worry about Jake and his new friend? But he knew why, he was jealous, just like Joey had said, and the thought of Jake being with another boy was tearing him apart.
"Hey, I ummm...I'm really sorry. You're right, I am jealous, but...OH GOD Joey, I don't know what to do. I love you too. I love both of you, and I don't fucking know what to do," he said burying his head in his hands and starting to cry too.
"I know," Joey said softly, "I'm sorry too, but I can't be second choice. Either I'm number one or I'm out. You decide and let me know, but I can't be with you right now. I called my folks on my cell and they're coming to pick me up," he added holding up his phone.
"No, you can't go..."
"I told them I wasn't feeling well and they bought it. They don't have to know anything else. I'll tell your folks I was homesick or something..."
"Oh God, it's all my fault..." Zak sobbed. "I should just throw myself in the lake and get it over with."
"Shut up and stop feeling sorry for yourself," Joey said, sounding angry now, "You hurt me Zak, and I may never get over it, so don't go feeling sorry for yourself and begging for pity."
"I know, I know. Joey, I do love you," Zak said daring to reach out and touch him gently.
"I know, and I love you too, but not as much as I did yesterday or the day before. I'm beginning to think we went too fast. Maybe we should have taken things slower and just got to know each other first. I hope...I hope that no matter what happens we can still be friends..."
"Joey, please don't go. Call your folks back and tell them you're okay or something."
"Its too late, they're on the way. I should go pack up my stuff."
By the time the two wandered back to the campsite the mess was cleaned up and everyone had scattered. Zak knew he would have to think of something to tell his folks, and he was dreading it, so instead he went to find Carlos.
"Uh, can we talk?" he said finding his brother in his tent reading a book.
"Sure little brother, what's up?"
"It's about me and Joey."
"Uh huh, something wrong?"
"He...he called his folks and they're on their way to pick him up."
Carlos closed his book and sat it aside, "Tell me what happened."
Zak laid out the details of what had gone on as Carlos took on a stricken look, "OH, man, that's bad. I mean I was afraid of something like this, but you three seemed to have worked it all out, then Shaun came along and well, I guess that tumped over the apple cart, huh?"
"I don't know why I said all those things, or why I care so much. I do love Joey, you gotta believe me, but maybe it's like he said, we took things too fast. Maybe...maybe we don't love each other as much as we thought we did. If that makes sense."
"Perfect sense. There are all kinds of love. You're both very young, and then there's the fact that you are in love with Jake, and always have been. That complicates things. Let me ask you this, do you think there's a chance that you got with Joey just because you were sure you would never have Jake that way?"
"I...I don't know. It seemed like Joey and I really hit it off from the very beginning, and Jake was sort of pushing me his way, like he wanted us to get together. So I guess I figured that was Jake's way of making sure I didn't go after him that way."
"Hmm...sounds like a lot of miscommunication and suppressed feelings. The question now is...what do we do? We have to tell mom and dad something before his folks get here. Where is he now?"
"Packing his stuff."
"Let's go talk to him."
But someone else had already discovered Joey stuffing his things in his gym bag and they were involved in a deep discussion.
"You can't just leave him like that," Jake argued, "It will kill him dude."
"He had his chance," Joey said flatly, "My folks are on the way and I'm leaving. I hope the two of you will be very happy," he said sarcastically.
"Joey, I was willing to wait. It's Zak that's pushing and making things hard for you guys, but I don't think he intended to hurt you. He just...he just gets a little carried away, that's all. Stay and talk to him. I think you two can work things out."
"Nope, I'm going. My folks will be here in a half hour or so," he said stubbornly as he zipped up his bag.
Just then Carlos and Zak poked their heads in, and seeing Jake there they came in on in to see what was going on.
"Talk to this kid," Jake begged, looking at Carlos, "he won't listen to me."
"Don't matter what you say, I'm going. My folks are on the way."
"Joey, don't you think it would have been better if you had stayed? It was just one more night. There will be a lot of questions asked about what went on and why you're leaving."
"My tummy hurts," Joey said grabbing his stomach and grimacing, then his face turned into a sneer, "think I don't know how to fake being sick? I'm a master at it. My folks will believe me, that's for sure."
"We need to tell mom and dad so they're not surprised when his folks show up," Carlos said, realizing that there was nothing more he could do.
"I think we should all go, but Joey should do the explaining," Carlos said, giving Joey a stern look.
"The lying, you mean," Joey laughed, "Why?" Jake and Zak are much better at lying than even I am."
"Joey..." but the word died on Zak's lips as there was a noise outside the tent.
"Boys, are you in there?" Mrs. Mason said, though it was obvious through the open door that they were.
"Yes mom, what's up?" Carlos said, speaking for all of them.
"Come out please, we need to talk."
The four filed out of the tent to find the Mason's standing there looking concerned.
"We just got a call from Joey's folks. They said he called and asked them to come get him, because he was sick. They were concerned, but they wanted to make sure he was really sick before they drove all this way. We assured them he was fine at lunch and that we'd check on him and call them back. Now, young man, what's really going on?" she said, giving Joey her sternest mother's look.
"I'm sorry," Joey said lowering his head, "I didn't think they'd call you. I was just...just homesick and wanted to go home, that's all," he said sounding pitiful.
"Oh you poor boy," Mrs. Mason said taking him in her arms, "I understand, but it's just for one more night. Don't you think you can brave it out one more night? Maybe you and Zak could sleep in the cabin tonight. The couch makes out into a nice bed."
"No, I'll be fine out here," Joey said accepting the inevitable, "you're right, it's just one more night. I guess I'll call my folks and tell them I'm okay now."
"I think that's best," she said giving him one more hug before releasing him, "It will be dark soon but there's still plenty of time to swim, who's up for some fun?"
Joey reluctantly made the call, and actually seemed in better spirits as they dressed in swim trunks and headed to the lake. He tried not to be too obvious as he avoided Zak as much as possible, but the other two boys knew what was going on, and were fearful their folks would soon catch on.
However, the Masons seemed more interested in each other and eventually went back to the cabin to shower and get dressed, leaving the boys to themselves.
"Are you ever going to talk to me again?" Zak said in frustration.
"What can I say? I've pretty much said it all by now."
"I said I was sorry..." Zak whined.
"I accept your apology, but nothing has changed really."
"What do you want me to do, say I will never speak to Jake again, or care about who he sees, maybe disown him as a brother? What can I do to make you happy?"
Jake heard his name fired off and he perked his ears up, but couldn't make out the words Zak was throwing out. It was obvious that he was upset or angry however, and he had no doubt he was partially to blame.
"I should never have got with Shaun," Jake sighed as he floated near Carlos who had been observing the two spatting lovers with concern.
"You can't let Zak run your life. He certainly doesn't let anyone run his, not even Joey apparently. You have a right to have friends and to develop those friendships however you like. You're not to blame for Joey and Zak's problems, Zak is. He says one thing and feels another and its come back to bite him in the butt."
"I feel so sorry for Joey. He doesn't deserve this shit."
"I do too, but there's nothing either of us can do. It's between them. All we can do is offer our support and hope things work out for the best."
"But what's the best? For them to be together, or to break up?"
"I don't know. Only they can decide that."
"I'm meeting Shaun tonight," Jake confessed, "At midnight. I thought you should know so you won't freak out if you find me gone."
"Oh, where...NO, don't tell me. None of my business."
"It's okay, we're going to go skinny dipping in the lake," Jake chuckled.
"Oh, well...that sounds like fun."
"Come with me then," Jake said quickly, and the more he thought about it the better it sounded, "we were just gonna swim, and I'd like you two to get better acquainted anyway."
"What would he say? Shouldn't you ask him first?" Carlos said, actually sounding interested in joining them.
"Naw, he'll be cool with it, but I gotta warn ya', he thinks you're hot," Jake chuckled.
Carlos blushed, but he smiled, "What have you been telling him about me?"
"Oh, nothing. I told him I thought you like girls, but then so does he. He's BI."
"Oh, well...at least we have something in common," he laughed.
"Two things, you both like me," Jake said splashing Carlos playfully, and that began the wrestling and grab ass that followed.
Meanwhile Zak had given up on Joey and had waded to shore and was sitting on a rock pouting. He envied the fun his two brothers were having, but was reluctant to join in for fear Joey would see it as his wanting to be near Jake. Why did they have to kiss? Things were fine before that. He and Joey were lovers, and he wasn't jealous of Jake, and he could just have fun with them like it should be.
"I hate this," he muttered to himself, "I wish I was straight and didn't have these feelings for boys."
Joey eventually climbed out, and without speaking, walked back up the trail toward the campsite. Zak wanted to follow him, to try to talk some sense into him, but instead he waded into the water and joined Carlos and Jake for some bro fun.
Things were tense in the tent that night as Joey and Zak settled down for their last night together. They had both hoped it would be a fun-filled night of growing closer, but instead a gloomy icy fog surrounded them and they both felt miserable.
Joey had moved his sleeping bag to the far side of the tent as far from Zak's as he could get it, and was laying on his side facing away from Zak as he stared at the wall of the tent.
"Joey, please..." Zak pleaded, "Just talk to me, that's all I ask."
"There's nothing to say," Joey said stubbornly, "First Braden, now you," he muttered, "I guess I was meant to be alone."
"Uh, Braden? What has that got to do with us?"
Joey sighed, "Nothing, sorry I brought it up. Just seems like I don't do too well when it comes to picking boyfriends."
"You did just fine with me, we just...we just got sort of off track. Please say you'll give me another chance."
"I can't, not till you settle this thing with Jake. I don't want to have to compete with him for your love and attention."
"He's my bro, you can't expect me to just forget about him and not hang around with him sometimes."
"That's not what I mean, and you know it. I'm talking about competing for your love. God, Zak, how could I have been so stupid? I could see from the moment you told me about Jake that you still loved him. I think, I think you were just using me to fill that hole that he left in your heart. I think I was just a substitute for him. Now, now...I see things differently, and I'm not sure we can ever be together again."
"Don't say that. Jake's out of the picture, I can't have him. He's found someone else..." Zak said voicing his real fears and using it as a crutch.
"Ha, see? This is what I'm talking about. All he's done is make a new friend and you've gone on like they're madly in love and boyfriends already. How do you even know this boy is gay or likes Jake that way? You don't, and still you're acting like a jealous lover."
"I...no, I just..." Zak began, and then falling back he moaned lowly, "Oh God, I'm so confused. I love two boys and now I can't have either of them. It's not you that's unlucky in love, it's me."
Joey laughed bitterly, "We're a pair all right. Both losers when it comes to love. Well, we can do two things, we can let our love turn to hate and never see each other again, or we can stay friends and be there for each other when we finally find the right guy to make it all work. Of course with you that's Jake."
"I could never hate you," Zak said as tears stained his face, "I still love you. I know you don't believe me right now, but it's true. It's just that...that..."
"That you love Jake more," Joey quickly finished for him, "I know, I guess I've always known. I guess it's good that I found all this out now and not later. I'll miss what we had, but I'll get over it." He laughed bitterly, "Mom tried to warn me, but I was so sure I knew what I was doing this time."
"Your mom knows...about us?'
"I told them about Braden and me so, yeah, they know I'm gay, and it was pretty obvious you and I were getting very close, very fast, so she put two and two together."
"I never knew she knew," Zak said numbly, "I could never tell my folks, they'd hate me..."
"What are you going to do when you and Jake finally get together then, just sneak around?" Joey laughed. He'd finally rolled over and was facing Zak now, and that at least was encouraging.
"We could never tell them. What if they decided to kick Jake out or something?"
"Do you really think that would happen? I know your folks pretty well by now. One thing I know is they aren't the kind of people who stop loving their kids cause they're gay or whatever. Your mom is the best. I feel like I have two moms now, and your dad, he's funny and he makes me feel welcome in your house."
"I guess you're right, but I'd still be embarrassed to come out to them."
"Do you really think they're so stupid that they don't already know?" He laughed again.
"What? Why do you say that?"
"Wow, you really are dense, aren't you? Do you think they haven't noticed how close we've become and all the little signals that we throw out. Man, wake up, they know about us, even if they don't come right out and say it."
Zak blushed, but he had to admit, it made sense.
"I thought Carlos was the only one who knew, and Jake of course..."
"Well, I don't know exactly how they'll feel about you and Jake being together, but I have a feeling it will all work out."
"I'm not sure that will ever happen," Zak muttered, "too much as happened now. I'm not sure it's the right thing to do after all."
"Maybe not, but you can't change how you feel about him. Eventually it's gonna happen, one way of the other."
"So, we're done? Is that what you're saying?" Zak said resigning himself to his fate, the fate that he'd brought about.
"I think it's for the best. I can get over you now, but if I wait too long, it will be harder."
"I didn't want it to end this way. This was supposed to be a time for us to get closer, not break up."
"You mean the sex? Yeah, it brought us closer in some ways, but sex without love and commitment is no good, not for me anyway. I'd rather we'd just held hands and kissed, and been like it used to be, than to have sex and then lose you this way."
"I feel awful," Zak confided, "Like I've lost something very important. It's like when I lost Jake all over again."
"Only, you haven't lost me completely. I meant it when I said I wanted to be friends. Can you do that? Or is that too much to ask?"
"No, no...please, I don't want to lose you completely. I want to stay friends, if you think you can stand me."
Joey laughed softly, "I think I can stand you."
"Can, can I give you a hug?" Zak said softly.
"Yeah, I think we both need a hug right now," Joey said as tears filled his eyes, then with a wicked smile he added, "but no groping."
The hug brought more tears as they clung to each other desperately, and neither was anxious to pull away. When they finally broke the hug Zak sat back on his haunches and wiped at his eyes as Joey composed himself.
"I'll always love you," Joey said wiping at his eyes.
"I think I'll always love you too. In a way you were really my first love, at least the first one that loved me back."
"No, Jake was your first love, and you know what they say about first love?" He sighed, "They are the one you never forget."
"Joey...I..."
"Its okay," Joey said waving his hand dismissively, "Its cool. I get it. I'm fine, you're fine. We're both fine."
"Friends?" Zak said holding out his hand.
"Friends," Joey said taking his hand and shaking it slowly.
They settled down shortly after that and Zak turned off the lantern. As the darkness descended over them Joey snuggled back into his sleeping bag and tried to will himself to sleep, but sleep would be a long time coming.
Zak lay on his back staring up at the tent roof and thinking about his life. Why were things always so hard? It seemed like no matter how hard he tried to make things work, he always messed up in the end. The thing with Joey had been good, sweet really. Joey was a nice kid and the time they'd shared, the touching, the kissing, and finally the sex had been wonderful. So why wasn't that enough? Why did he have to sabotage their relationship? And for what? He was no closer to getting with Jake than before, and now he'd ruined the one good thing he had going.
It was well past midnight when Joey finally succumbed to sleep and as he gently snored, Zak still lay there, no closer to sleep than he'd been when he first lay down. Finally he decided maybe some fresh air would help clear his head and he decided to take a walk.
He checked to make sure Joey was still sleeping peacefully, and as he gazed upon his angelic face he felt a pang in his heart. Stifling a sob he crawled to the tent flap and unzipped it. Taking one last look he stepped out into the night and zipped the tent closed behind him.
He had no real destination in mind, instead just letting his feet lead him, and soon found himself on the path to the lake. As he got closer to the lake he could hear splashing and voices. He stopped for a moment, not sure if he wanted to invade someone's private lake party. The voices were obviously male and one of them sounded familiar. It only took him a moment to realize who that voice belonged to, and it didn't take much thought to figure out who the other voice belonged to. It was Jake and his new friend Shaun, it had to be.
Quietly he slipped down the path, giving no thought to the fact that his spying might only make things worse.
"Stop it dick week," he heard Jake laugh.
"Whatsamatter?" Shaun said, in a funny voice.
"Nothing, except I don't want to drown, that's all."
"Okay, okay...sorry. Hey, wanna get out for a while and dry off some?"
"Okay, it's a little cold in here."
Zak froze in place, now only a few yards from the lake, but still concealed by the darkness and the trees. He could hear the two sloshing up out of the lake, then some soft giggling, then it was quiet as the two obviously settled somewhere.
"Bummer about Joey and your bro. That really sucks. I only saw him from a distance, but he's a cute kid."
"Joey is a sweet kid, and he didn't deserve this. I blame myself really. I should never have kissed Zak and stirred up all this trouble."
"Hey, you didn't do anything wrong. You just followed your heart, and my dad says that's never wrong."
"Was it like that with your friend?"
"Yeah, I pretty much knew I loved him right off, but of course you know how that turned out?"
How did it turn out? Zak wondered, What happened with Shaun's friend, and was Shaun gay? And most importantly, what did this have to do with him and Joey, or him and Jake?
"Sorry, didn't mean to bring up sad stuff."
"Naw, it's okay. So...what are you gonna do, about Zak? I mean now that he broke it off with Joey, you're good to go, right?"
"Its more complicated than that. I mean, I guess I thought I'd have to wait for this thing with Zak and Joey to run its course, now suddenly it has, and I don't know if I'm ready for this."
"Why, cause you met me?" Shaun said suddenly, "Did I complicate things?"
"No...maybe," Zak said sounding distraught.
"Hey, I understand, but we just met, and you've known Zak all your life. We're friends, that's all. Surely Zak understands that, right?
"Well..."
"What? What are you not telling me?"
Zak knew where this was headed and he wasn't sure he wanted to hear a replay of his outlandish behavior at dinner. He was surprised that Jake didn't smear him in front of his new friend, but instead he waxed the whole thing over and put part of the blame on himself.
"I think he's afraid of losing me, not just as a lover, but as a friend, and a brother, and I think he might have sabotaged his relationship with Joey because of that fear. I feel so bad for him and I blame myself for most of it."
"Dude, you must be about the nicest guy I've ever met," Shaun chuckled.
"I don't feel so nice right now. Shaun..."
"Yeah, dude. I know, no messing around tonight, and I'm cool with it. I understand," Shaun laughed.
"Really? You don't mind?"
This was good news as far as Zak was concerned, but he was a little surprised too. Was Jake just being noble, or was he really concerned about how his relationship with Shaun affected him?
"Naw, it's cool. I have a little confession to make anyway. Remember Larry, the guy I introduced you to at the tent?"
Zak was straining his ears now, since the boys were speaking in a more conspiratorial tone now.
"He finally rub his dick on your lips?" Jake joked.
"Well, at first, then he rubbed it a whole lot lower. If you know what I mean," Shaun said with an embarrassed laugh.
"Oh my God, but you said he was hung like a horse. How did that go?"
"Well, it was slow going at first, but we managed. He's actually a very gentle lover," Shaun said almost swooning.
"He's straight though, right?"
"Is anyone really totally straight?" Shaun said, "Like I said, most of my friends don't really put a label on things. It was good for both of us and we're still bros. No pressure, and who knows? It might happen again."
"I'm happy for you," Jake said, then there was an awkward silence before he spoke again, "Does this mean...um, that you don't want to keep in touch?"
"No, dude, I still want to hang out. I mean, if you do. Since you're the one who seems to have a problem with us...you know..."
"I still want to hang out with you, and I'm not ruling out anything in the future, I'm just not up for anything tonight," Jake said defensively.
"Cool," Shaun said, apparently satisfied with Jake's reply, "Its late, maybe we should head on out."
"Yeah, probably. Again, Carlos said he was sorry he couldn't make it, he just wasn't feeling it."
"That's cool, but I wouldn't have minded seeing him naked," Shaun laughed.
"Perv," Jake chuckled.
"Come on, you know I'm right. He's a stud, isn't he? I bet you've seen him naked lots of times haven't you? What's that like, is he hung?'
"You'll have to find that one out for yourself, but I will tell you this, he's uncut."
"Oh man, I love un-skinned weenies," Shaun said sounding excited, "Dude, you have to hook me up."
"Whoa, I'm not a dating service," Jake laughed, "Besides, as far as I know Carlos has never done anything with a dude."
He's got that wrong, Zak thought from his hiding place nearby, but that was a long time ago, and now he wasn't sure if Carlos was having any kind of sex, except with his hand.
"Well, just bring him around sometime. I'll do the rest," Shaun said.
Their voices sounded louder now and Zak realized they were moving his way. He practically fell down as he turned to head back up the trail, and without looking back he took off at a trot until he was sure he was far enough ahead of the two to not be seen.
He stopped at the bathroom on his way back to the tent and was just putting his junk away when he heard voices approaching from the same direction he'd come from. He swore softy under his breath and braced himself for what was to come next.
"Hey," he said as the two wandered in the door.
"Zak," Jake said looking surprised.
"Yeah, had to pee," he said grinning, "Oh, hi Shaun. How's it going? Sorry if I seemed unfriendly earlier," Zak said sheepishly.
"It's cool dude, no apologies necessary," Shaun said opting to take the stall and closing the door behind him, he pulled down his shorts and let loose, "I really needed to go," he chuckled.
"Yeah, me too," Jake said heading toward the urinal to unload.
"Well, see ya in the morning," Zak said loud enough for both boys to hear, "Nice seein' you again Shaun," he added, then feeling like a total hypocrite he quickly scampered out the door.
Shaun shook off the last few drops and exited the stall just as Jake was finishing up, "Well, that was refreshing," he chuckled.
"And totally unexpected," Jake said shaking his head, "Its like that Jekyl/Hyde thing."
"Yeah, well...maybe him and Joey patched things up and had some makeup sex," Shaun teased.
"Maybe," Jake said frowning, "So what does that mean?" he said, more to himself than to Shaun.
"Dude, I was kidding. Maybe he's just happy that now he's free to get with you."
"I don't know, it was almost like he knew we were coming. Do you think he saw us, down by the lake?"
"Naw, no way. He'd have been pissed otherwise. Just be glad he's in a better mood and don't read more into it than there is."
"You're right, he's a cool dude, and he's probably just come to his senses. Anyway, I might check on him before I go to my tent."
"Yeah, speaking of tents, I should get going. Who knows? Larry might be waiting for me," he laughed.
"You animal," Jake teased, "Well...guess I'll be seein' ya," he added, feeling a bit awkward, was a hug out of place, a kiss...what was proper for two guys who'd just met, but had been intimate?
Shaun however seemed to know exactly what to do, and pulling Jake into a hug he kissed him properly, causing Jake to regret his decision not to fool around.
"Wow, that was..."
"Too much?" Shaun said pulling back a little.
"No, no, not at all. I was just thinking about huggin' you. I was just thinking about what I was missing out on," he added chuckling.
"Well, I won't push, but you know I'm down with whatever you want."
"I think we should just leave it as it is...for now," Jake sighed, "but thanks. You've been great, and I'm gonna miss you, but hopefully I'll see ya soon."
"Yeah, you better call me," Shaun warned, "or I'll come huntin' you."
"No worries, I'll call," Jake chuckled, "well...walk me out?"
"Yeah, absolutely."
Outside the two exchanged a brief goodnight then started off in opposite directions. It was late, but Jake was still determined to check on Zak before he turned in. As he approached the tent he saw a lone figure standing outside and he chuckled, apparently Zak felt the same way.
"Hey," Zak said softly, meeting Jake halfway.
"Hey, I'm glad you're still up. I wanted to talk to you, make sure you're okay."
"Thanks, I'm fine now," Zak said smiling for the first time all day, "I wanted to say I was really sorry about all that stuff I said today."
"Its no big deal, really. I'm just glad you seem better now."
"Yeah, well...Joey and I came to an understanding. We're not boyfriends anymore, but we're still friends, and I guess that's better than nothing."
"You didn't have to do that."
"It wasn't really my choice," Zak sighed as they continued to walk along the same path they'd trod a few minutes earlier, "He made it clear that he didn't want to go on like we were."
"And that's my fault," Jake said sighing, "I should have just kept my stupid feelings to myself."
"Your feelings aren't stupid, and neither are mine," Zak said frowning, "You still...feel the same about me, right?"
"Zak," Jake said stopping and taking Zak's hand, "I may not understand everything about what I'm feeling, but I'm pretty sure what I feel for you is something very special, more than just friendship, more than brotherly love. I'm scared, but I'm willing to try to make things work...if you are."
"Oh Jake," Zak said as tears stung his eyes, "I love you, I've loved you since the first day we met, and all I ever dreamed about was being with you forever. I thought just having you as a brother would be enough, but there is so much more I want for us. I want us to be...to be together like...like lovers I guess, like boyfriends."
Jake pulled Zak close and kissed his face, his nose, his cheeks, and finally their lips met and the kiss became steamy. The resulting swelling between their legs was obvious as they pressed together almost desperately.
"Oh Jake, I've wanted this for so long," Zak said between nibbles of Jake's lips and ears.
"Me too, I guess I just couldn't admit it till now."
"Can we...you know...go somewhere and..?"
"Yeah, come on," Jake said, understanding exactly what Zak wanted, and he wanted it too.
He led him to the lake and as they embraced once more, Jake began to push down Zak's shorts. This was new territory for Jake, but being with Shaun had helped. At least he knew he was capable in that area, and he knew Zak was even more experienced than he was. He figured between the two of them he could make this something special.
Zak took the cue from Jake and began tugging at Jake's swim trunks and soon their shorts were pooling around their feet. Stepping out of them they pressed together desperately and continued to kiss. It was Jake who broke the kiss, and sliding down Zak's body until he was kneeling before him, he kissed Zak's flat stomach causing the young teen to throw back his head and moan softly.
"Yes, god I've dreamed about this so many times."
"I love you," Jake said, choking up with emotion now that he was finally able to prove his love, "and I promise you I will do everything I can to make you happy."
Then moving down he began to nuzzle the soft curls above Zak's erection, causing more moaning. When he finally took the nearly perpendicular shaft into his hungry mouth, he felt Zak's knees buckle a little, and if not for the strong grip he had on the boy he might have collapsed.
"Oh God....shit...that feels so good...I love you so much."
Zak's words of encouragement and love spurred Jake on, and he continued with renewed fervor as he demonstrated his deep throating technique. Zak's eyes rolled up and he cried out as the first burst of his teenage seed fired out, going down Jake's throat without the benefit of him tasting it. Jake was prepared for the second blast, and caught it on his tongue and savored the sweet/salty/spicy taste as he moaned his approval.
When he had milked Zak dry he kissed the boy's cockhead and stood once more, taking him in his arms and sharing his own taste as they kissed.
"Did I do okay?" Jake whispered as they broke the kiss and just hugged each other tightly.
"OH God, Jake, that was perfect. It's everything I ever dreamed it would be. It was just like when we were younger, you always knew just how to make me feel good."
"We both did," Jake admitted, "I should have known then that what I was feeling was more than just playful boy stuff. You knew though, didn't you? You knew we were meant to be together, that we fit together like two pieces of a puzzle. God, all that time I wasted, can you ever forgive me?"
"Yes, I've forgiven you a long time ago. All that's important is what we have now. I'm so happy," Zak said near tears.
"Me too," Jake said pressing his hardness into Zak, reminding him that he had needs too.
"Now, its your turn," Zak said with a grin, "I am going to lick you all over and then give you the best beejay you've ever had."
Jake groaned, but he wasn't hating it.
The trip back into town the next morning was uneventful. Joey and Zak carried on the usual type of conversation, but even the adults were aware that something had changed. No longer were there the furtive glances or the accidental on purpose touching or discrete hand holding. They'd begun to put the pieces of the puzzle together, but they still weren't sure exactly what happened, and they weren't sure they'd ever know. All they could was be supportive and accept whatever decision the boys had made.
The dropped Joey off and he thanked the Masons and waved as he went inside. The ride to the Masons house was a quiet one, and no one seemed willing or able to intrude on the silence. At home they unloaded quickly, leaving the camping equipment and such in the garage, and dumping their dirty clothes in the laundry room before heading off to shower and change.
"You two look happy," Carlos said grinning as he peeked in on the two who were digging out a change of clothes from the closet they shared.
"Do you think mom and dad noticed anything?" Zak asked with concern.
"About you two, or about you and Joey?"
"Either."
"Well, they're not blind. I suppose they might just think you two had a fight or were tired of each other after spending the weekend together, but I'm pretty sure they noticed you two weren't as close as you usually are."
"Damn," Jake said, "I never thought about that. What if they start asking questions?"
"Then you need to answer them as honestly as possible. You don't have to tell them everything. Maybe just tell them that you and Joey are still friends, but that things were moving a little fast and you've decided to slow things down. Something like that." Carlos suggested.
"But that's like admitting that we were, ummm...you know more than friends before."
"Well, I don't think there's any doubt in my mind that they already knew, but if you want to play things differently just be careful, because too many lies only complicate things."
"I don't like lying to mom and dad at all," Zak sighed, "but there are some things I just can't talk about...not yet. I'll think of something to say, but if I'm lucky...maybe they won't ask too many questions."
**Joey took his stuff to his bedroom and was unpacking it when his mom popped in the open door.
"Have fun?" she asked smiling, but one look at her son's face said he wasn't in the best of moods at the moment, "What's wrong dear. You look like you've lost your best friend."
"I don't want to talk about it right now," Joey said, fighting back tears.
"Oh, well...maybe later. Eventually you need to get it all out. Right now why don't you take a nap? Let me have your dirty clothes and I'll get them washed up while you rest."
"Okay," Joey said making a pile of his dirty things. Suddenly he froze as he pulled a pair of white CK undies out of his bag. He didn't own any undies like this, they had to be Zak's, and suddenly he flashed back to the first night they were together in the tent. He remembered Zak was wearing those briefs and they looked so sexy on him. A lump formed in his throat as he thought about how beautiful Zak's body was when he finally got those briefs off and he felt his knees go weak. He couldn't let his mom know though. She'd just say she told him so, and he'd be in for more heartache.
Taking a deep breath he stuffed the briefs back into his backpack, hoping his mom didn't notice, but looking back he saw that she had left, only to return a few minutes later with a laundry basket. She scooped up his dirty things and gave him a brief hug before heading off to the laundry room.
When she was gone Joey closed his bedroom door and removed the briefs from his backpack and placed them under his pillow. It was all he had left of Zak and he was reluctant to give them up. If Zak asked about them he would feign ignorance.
He stripped off his clothes and threw them in the hamper, then stepped into the shower and took a long hot shower. As he lowered his head and let the water cascade over his back and neck he thought of Zak and the tears began to flow. Why was it every time he fell in love with someone it didn't work out? Was he destined to always be alone? Why can't I find someone who loves me as much as I love them?
When he was all cried out he stepped out and dried off, and walking into his room he fell naked into his bed. At first he just lay there, staring at the ceiling and willing his mind to go blank, then remembering what was under his pillow he pulled out the pair of white boxer briefs and stared at them. Then slowly bringing them to his nose he sniffed them. He was immediately rewarded by the scent of his ex-lover and he felt a stiffening between his legs, but then the pain came.
"Oh God Zak, why...why can't you love me as much as I love you," he sobbed, then stuffing the undies beneath his pillow he rolled onto his stomach and pounded his pillow with frustration. "Why, why, why?"
He knew there was no way he could get Zak back now, for even though they'd thought he was asleep, he had heard them the night before outside the tent. He'd heard them declare their love for one another, and when they gone off to the lake to make love he'd followed them and observed with an aching heart what they'd done. It was really over now, he sobbed into his pillow, and there was nothing left. No reason to go on, being friends just wouldn't be enough, and it hurt too much to live this way. No, he'd just have to break it off completely, but he wondered if he was really that strong.
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