The Jerk-Off
by Jack Lynch
Epilogue
Maybe I'll Join You.
They spooned together on the California king bed, the dinner tray filled with what was left of a steak frites dinner for two, near their feet. A bottle of champagne, half consumed, was on the room service table. The lights of downtown Minneapolis twinkled outside the tall windows of the upper floor suite in the trendy Rand Tower Hotel. Heavy drapes, dramatic lighting, ornate wallpaper, and 12-foot ceilings.
Elliott yawned, nudging the guy behind him. He could tell from his breathing that he was starting to fall asleep. He turned his head to be sure.
"When are you going to stop using that shampoo? It smells like shit."
"As soon as the dandruff is gone," he murmured.
Elliott yawned again and, with it, released a long and satisfying sigh. "Well, what do you think, brother dear?"
"I think—well, I think," Stuart yawned. "We should get ready for bed. We fly out in a few hours." He stood up and stretched, turning to his identical twin.
"You gonna miss this place?"
"Ha! Not for a minute!" Elliott laughed. Then he became a bit more serious. "Well, I'll miss Freddie. Maybe a little."
"Awww, Elliott, someone have a crush?" Stuart teased.
Elliott sought to change the subject.
"So tell me, Little, what have you got lined up for us next?" Elliott frequently called him that. Stuart was, after all, three minutes younger than he was.
"Well, while you were in the shower, I received a dark web message from an old acquaintance of ours."
"I could only guess."
"Yeah, you could, but you'd probably be wrong. It was Wy Valdespino. He's got a project for us in Monte Carlo. Something about a backgammon tournament."
"So, we're switching sides?"
"Why not? The FBI pays top dollar. You know that."
Elliott sighed. "Well, good. I hate cold weather, anyway. I hope this one takes us through the winter."
"Maybe you could find a way to get Fred to join us."
Elliott chuckled. "There's an idea." He pulled himself off the bed, grabbing a leftover morsel of meat from the dinner tray.
"Where ya goin'?"
"To the bathroom. I'm gonna take a whiz and maybe jerk-off."
"There's an idea," Stuart mimicked, with a giggle. "Maybe I'll join you."
The End.
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