Love Conquers All
by Flaming Matt
Chapter 18
November 2015
"Come on Wesley, they're giving you space, but we have to go and get in the car, please." Carter states in a sad tone, as he holds his boyfriend tightly and could only imagine how hard this must be for him and knew that he had no real idea of how he would cope if roles were reversed.
"I... I can't Carter, if we go... if we... he will... he will really be gone... I just got him... to... to love me... I don't want him to be gone." Wesley only just manages to respond in between sobs, as he struggles to cope with all the emotions he was feeling right now and he just wanted to curl up in a ball and cry.
"You need to say goodbye Wesley." Carter then says, as he tries to think of something to help his boyfriend. "Hey! Look at me Wesley, look at me." He then states in a firmer tone, as he steps back a little bit and holds his boyfriends face with his hands. "He's gone and you need to be strong for just one more day, because you need to say goodbye to him." He then states in a serious tone, as he just goes with his gut instinct and hopes he can get his boyfriend to compose himself, at least enough to somehow get through today.
"I... I don't... I don't want him..." Wesley tries to say in response, but he just can't pull himself together and even the feeling of his boyfriends lips against his own doesn't help.
"I will carry you out of this house if I have to, you may be a fat arse, but I can carry you over my shoulder." Carter then states firmly, as he decides to try a different approach and while his boyfriends expression was hardly reassuring, he at least seemed to not be getting angry, which right now, he counted as a good sign.
"You're making jokes?" Wesley asks in a slightly irritated tone and while he was angry and somewhere inside him, he actually found his boyfriends words a little funny, he really wasn't in the mood for it and he didn't want his boyfriend to try to make him laugh, not today, today wasn't a day to be laughing.
"I'm making promises and if you don't pull yourself together, then I will carry you out of this house." Carter responds firmly and while he knew he would probably fail, at least when they got to the stairs, he had to try something to get his boyfriend to leave the house, otherwise his parents would come back inside and he knew they would drag him there if they had to and that wasn't going to end well for anyone.
"You could try." Wesley then states coldly, before stepping towards his boyfriend and putting a hand around his throat, before quickly wincing and groaning as he drops to his knees holding his groin.
"Do that again Wesley and we're done." Carter then states in a venomous tone, as he stands in front of his boyfriend while holding his neck and while his boyfriend hadn't squeezed his neck, he was still shocked that he had put his hand around it like that.
"I... fuck... you... you fucking kneed me in... in the... fucking balls..." Wesley just about manages to say, as he struggles to catch his breath and even though he knew what he had done was wrong, he still couldn't believe his boyfriend had kneed him in the balls.
"You put your hand around my throat." Carter quickly retorts in a softening tone and while he was still angry, he was starting to feel a little guilty about his reaction, especially since he knew his boyfriend wouldn't have actually hurt him.
"Fuck... you kneed me in... the balls..." Wesley then says, before looking up at his boyfriend and smiling proudly at him. "I'm really sorry." He then says in a sincere, but equally ashamed tone, as his smile fades and he really thinks about what he had just done.
"I have a good self defence teacher." Carter responds with a shy smile and while inside he really wanted to make his boyfriend suffer a little bit, just to let him know that he had fucked up, there were bigger things happening right now and his boyfriend was burying his brother in a couple of hours and any anger he felt about being grabbed around the throat, quickly disappeared and he instinctively holds out his hand for his boyfriend to take.
"I don't know why I..." Wesley then begins to apologise, but as soon as he lets his boyfriend help him get to his feet, he is interrupted by the feeling of being pulled into a loving cuddle. "But... but I hurt you..." He then begins to say in a confused tone, before this time being silenced by his boyfriends lips briefly pressing against his own.
"And I kneed you in the balls and I meant what I said Wesley, you ever do that again, we're done." Carter responds in a serious tone, after he leans back from the kiss and again, while he was angry, today was bigger than that. "But we're good, I mean I'm angry and tomorrow, I might show you just how angry, but we're good, okay." He then adds in a firm tone, before giving his boyfriend a couple of quick and tender pecks on the lips.
"I don't deserve you." Wesley then states in an ashamed tone, as he tries to pull away from his boyfriend, but instead, finds himself being kissed again and despite not thinking he deserved it, he quickly melts into his arms and returns the passionate kiss.
"You're going through a lot and I don't know how you feel Wesley, I can only guess and I know you don't want to be angry and upset and I know that you would never hurt me, so let's get through this together and I'm going to do my best to help you, okay." Cater responds after a few moments of silence, as he thinks about what he wanted to say and how to say it, because again, while he was angry at his boyfriend for grabbing his throat, he just knew it wasn't his fault and was just angry and upset, which made the difference between wanting to break up with his boyfriend because of it and staying with him and supporting him through all of this.
"Still doesn't make it okay, I don't ever want to hurt you..." Wesley then begins to say in a sincere tone, before trailing off for a few seconds as he gazes into his boyfriends beautiful violet eyes. "You're the only thing that matters to me Carter, you're my whole world and I don't ever want to lose you, please forgive me." He then says from the heart, as he looks at his boyfriend pleadingly and despite trying his best, he could feel himself tremble a little bit and feels a couple of tears rolling down his face.
"I wouldn't be here if I didn't forgive you Wesley, you're my world too, but you need to sort yourself out, because I won't let you hurt me, no matter how much you're going through, you can't take it out on me or anyone else like that." Carter responds firmly, as he leans back from his boyfriend and stares at him expectantly.
"I don't know why I did it, I hate fighting, you know I do Carter, but I... it's just like... I don't know, it's like it's not even me and it scares me Carter, I don't want to hurt anyone, especially you, if I ever hurt you, like really hurt you, I would never forgive myself, never." Wesley then states sincerely, as he feels more tears rolling down his face, before flinching a little when he feels his boyfriends finger on his face, but quickly relaxes and smiles at him, as he realises that he was just wiping away his tears.
"Tomorrow, we will find you someone to talk to, you know, someone like your dad and we will go together." Carter then decides to suggest in a soft tone, before wiping a few more tears from his boyfriends face and kissing him for a few moments.
"But I don't..." Wesley starts to protest weakly, but quickly finds himself being interrupted and knew exactly what his boyfriend was about to say.
"Matt and Ben got help when they needed it and Tobias has been to see someone as well and you encouraged them Wesley, so you're going to speak to someone whether you like it or not and I'm going with you." Carter states firmly and this time instead of pulling his boyfriend closer or leaning in for a kiss, he backs away from him. "I mean it Wesley, now we need to straighten our clothes out and head outside, because your parents will come and get us soon." He then says in the same tone, before looking down at himself and fixing his suit, while Wesley does the same after deciding to accept what his boyfriend had said and not argue about it.
One Hour Later
"It's not his fault Wesley." Carter states in a concerned tone, as he holds his boyfriend back against the wall. "Stop it Wesley, just fucking stop it!" He then states in a firm tone, as he stares into his boyfriends eyes.
"You heard him Carter, you fucking heard what he just said, he admitted it, he fucking admitted it." Wesley responds in a seething tone and he just wanted to confront the older boy and make him pay.
"Yeah I heard him and I heard what he said, but you're not..." Carter then begins to respond, before finding himself pushed back and then turned so that he was now being held against the wall.
"He could have saved him, all he had to do was listen and he just... he just... he fucking hung up..." Wesley spits out venomously at his boyfriend, before jumping back a little bit as he anticipates his boyfriend kneeing him in the balls again. "I... I wasn't..." He then begins to apologise in a horrified tone, as he realises that he must have scared his boyfriend again, but when he feels himself being kissed, he couldn't help but be surprised and doesn't even realise that he was now backed up against the wall again.
"Jim wasn't some little kid Wesley, he was a grown man and yeah, if Mitch had carried on talking to him, then he might have not gone to the motel, but how was Mitch meant to know that? How many times did you tell me not to worry and how Jim did this all the time? Getting mad at Mitch doesn't solve or change anything and Mitch has always looked after you, even when your own family didn't care." Carter then says in a serious and no nonsense tone, as he stares into his boyfriends eyes again and this time, he makes sure he can't be turned around again so easily.
"But he just..." Wesley begins to try and protest, but again feels himself being kissed and despite enjoying it, he wasn't in the mood and just about manages to push his boyfriend back enough to break the kiss. "Stop doing that." He then says in a cold tone, before looking into his boyfriends eyes and he couldn't help but look at him in shame.
"Stop being an idiot then, because even if Mitch could have kept talking, he might not have been able to stop Jim going and it doesn't even matter, because Mitch was looking after Jordan, who we all encouraged to ask Mitch to go running with and Jordan was in trouble, so what else was Mitch meant to do Wesley? What would you have done?" Carter states in response and while he could be angry at his boyfriend, especially as he had warned him earlier about taking things out on him, he had pinned him to the wall first and knew the risks, so it wasn't the same as earlier, although that didn't mean he was going to let his boyfriend hurt him and he wasn't going to get upset unless that actually happened.
"I don't care, I don't fucking care Carter, he just admitted it, we heard him, he blames himself and he wouldn't do that..." Wesley begins to respond, before trailing off in surprise and confusion, as he feels his boyfriend step away from him and despite his anger and confusion, he couldn't help but feel lost and alone and quickly tries and fails to pull him back towards him.
"Then wait until tomorrow, today is about Jim, not about how pissed off you are or about blaming someone, so you have to promise me Wesley, promise me you won't say anything." Carter says in a firm tone, as he looks at his boyfriend pleadingly and while he wanted to cuddle and comfort him, he knew he had to at least get him through today and hopefully, once they got home, he could convince him overnight that it wasn't Mitch's fault.
"Or what?" Wesley quickly retorts in a hurt and angry tone, his boyfriend should be on his side, not confronting him and having a go at him and he was starting to lose patience.
"No threats, no walking away Wesley, but if you confront Mitch, you will regret it and you will ruin what today is meant to be about and you will lose my respect." Carter responds honestly, as he takes another step back from his boyfriend and while he would always love him, he needed to somehow make him see sense and he was hoping he could shock him into it, after failing with his previous approaches.
"I... but you..." Wesley then tries to respond, but his boyfriends words had stunned him and while he didn't really know what losing his boyfriends respect meant, well in terms of their relationship, he knew it wasn't good and he could feel himself beginning to shake. "You said... I don't... I don't want him to be dead, please Carter... please..." He then says in an emotional tone, as he struggles to hold himself together and as soon as he feels his boyfriends arms around him, he can't hold it back any longer and begins to cry his heart out.
"It's okay, it's okay, I promise." Carter then says in a soothing tone, while pulling his boyfriend away from the wall a little bit, just so that he could rub his back and try and comfort him as best as he could.
"The police talked to Jarred?" Alex asks in a surprised tone and wasn't quite sure if that was a good thing or something he should be worried about.
"I don't know what the talk was about exactly, but I believe it was about the attack on you and Peter's kidnapping." Gordon answers honestly, although as soon as he sees his sons expression, he knew he might have made a mistake in telling him. "Alex, sit down and listen to me, because this is important." He quickly decides to state, as he thinks about the best way to go about this and make his son understand that this didn't mean what he had obviously assumed it meant.
"Okay, sorry Dad." Alex responds in a slightly embarrassed tone, as he sits back down and looks at his dad, who he could see had a serious look and was beginning to worry that this wasn't what he thought it would be.
"I don't know what questions they asked him or what answers he gave, but I do know that they questioned him for a reason and while that is good news and it shows that they're taking what I told them seriously, I don't think it will help you avoid whatever punishment you might receive for your own attack on Jarred, you were caught in the act by two police officers and that kind of thing doesn't just go away Alex." Gordon then starts to explain in a reluctant tone, as he sees the look on his sons face and knew that he had made a complete mess of this conversation and had gotten his hopes up and then dashed them within a few minutes.
"I don't want to go to prison or wherever they will send me Dad, I'm not a criminal and..." Alex begins to plead with his dad, but falling silent as he looks at his expression and couldn't help but smile sadly at him.
"You won't be going anywhere like that Alex, you're twelve years old and this is your first offence, but unless Jarred and his parents drop the charges, then you will be getting a criminal record and that will affect you for the rest of your life and that is something you will have to live with and hopefully learn from." Gordon then decides to explain as clearly as he can, as he tries his best to get his son to realise the consequences to his actions.
"Even if he is the one who attacked me and then kidnapped Peter?" Alex then quickly asks in a hopeful tone, but once again, the look on his dads face dashes his hopes again and he couldn't help but slump back into his chair.
"Look, I honestly don't know Alex, but if he is guilty and he did do all of that, then I think the police will look into what happened when you attacked Jarred and take the idea that he set that up more seriously, because it is suspicious and it would give him motive to do that." Gordon answers honestly, but quickly realises his mistake. "Alex, I'm a doctor, I'm not a lawyer or a police officer, I don't know if it will happen like that and I don't want you getting your hopes up and even if it does work out, I don't expect you to forget about your actions and how disappointed I am with what you did, even if he did set you up, it doesn't excuse what you did, do you understand me?" He then adds in a serious tone, as he tries his best to keep control of the situation and make sure that his son didn't misunderstand what they were talking about and the consequences of his actions.
"Yes Sir, but er... well I know I did wrong, but... but you er... you won't stop loving me will you?" Alex then asks in response, as he looks at his dad meekly and even though they've talked about this before, he was feeling vulnerable and he needed his dad to reassure him and make him feel safe.
"I will never stop loving you Alex." Gordon quickly responds from the heart, without even having to think of how to respond to that question. "Now come here and give me a cuddle and if you want to have your friends come here later on, you have your chore list and I expect it to be completed before I allow that to happen." He then states in a firm, but calm tone, before standing up and smiling, as he sees his son getting up and walking towards him.
"I love you too Dad and I don't even know if Matt and Ben will come here, but I was going to do the chores anyway, I want to... I just..." Alex responds as best as he can after cuddling his dad, but when he interrupts him, he can't help but feel a little relieved and cuddles him a little tighter.
"I know, you're a good boy Alex and I'm proud of the person you're becoming, everyone makes mistakes, but as long as you learn from those and accept the consequences of your actions, then you can hold your head up high." Gordon then states sincerely, as he enjoys the embrace with his son, but as he looks up at the clock, he can't help but be a little disappointed. "Alex, time is getting on, but if you want to get a drink or something quick to eat, then you can before you start your chores, okay." He then suggests in a soft and caring tone, after letting go of his son and smiling warmly at him.
"I'm okay Dad, but I might have a juice in a little while." Alex responds with a happy smile and despite still feeling nervous and afraid of what will happen to him, the fact his dad supported him and still loved him, meant everything to him and quickly gives his dad another quick cuddle, before heading out to the back garden to start his chores.
"I can't believe he's really gone." Tobias says in a sad tone, he had never been to a funeral before, well at least he couldn't remember ever going and while he didn't know Jim that well, he still knew him and he also couldn't help but think about his own family and how he had missed their funerals.
"I didn't know him at all, but everyone says that he was nice." Lily states as she does her best to support her boyfriend, who she could tell was struggling a lot more than he was showing on the outside.
"He was funny and cool, not as cool as Mitch, but still fun to be around." Tobias then says with a sad smile, as he glances around and sees his two friends cuddled up together at the front of the church and wishes he could be with them.
"I don't know why Mitch blames himself though." Lily then decides to say in a quiet tone, she knew her boyfriend had told her about it in confidence and didn't want anyone to overhear what she had just said, but she was curious and wanted to try and understand why he would think that it was his fault.
"He does though, well not so much now, but he still wishes he did more." Tobias responds in a distracted tone, as he sees his friend crying on his other friends shoulder and again, he just wished he could be sitting with them, even if he did understood why he couldn't.
"He wasn't even there though and it's not like he was responsible for him, I just don't get why he blames himself." Lily then states in an even quieter tone, as she really didn't want anyone else hearing this and knew it was private.
"I know." Tobias responds quietly, after focusing back on his girlfriend and not really knowing what else to say about the whole thing and he could also see his uncle giving him a questioning look. "He has Erica and she will talk some sense into him and our parents will talk to him as well, just so er... well you know, just so he doesn't keeping er... being silly." He then adds in a slightly more upbeat tone and even though his big brother was feeling down, he knew that they would get through to him eventually and he would be okay again.
"Is Alex okay?" Lily then decides to ask, after deciding to try and change the subject and while it wasn't a happy change, she thought it might take her boyfriends mind of his friends sitting near the front, who she could see were cuddled together and upset.
"I doubt it and er... well I think Matt and Ben will visit him today or I might try tomorrow, he shouldn't be alone." Tobias responds in a sad tone and couldn't help but feel sorry for his friend and all that he had lost recently and although they weren't really close, he did like being around him and thought he was funny, so he wanted to try and be a good friend.
"It was funny that he beat up Jarred though, although it's not fair that he is getting in trouble for it, but a lot of the girls at my school don't like Jarred, so Alex is quite popular now." Lily then decides to say, as she tries to give her boyfriend something to smile about, before looking to her side in surprise after feeling her shoulder being gently nudged.
"Now is not the time for talking, so be quiet and pay attention please." Mike states in a subdued tone, he had heard a little bit of their conversation and had tried to let them talk to each other, but he noticed a few people look over and knew that he needed to get them to be quiet for a little while, even if he did feel a little guilty for being a little harsher than he had intended to sound.
"Sorry Mike." Tobias quickly responds meekly and knew that he and his girlfriend must have been talking too loudly and could feel his cheeks burning a little bit.
"Sorry Mr Walker." Lily then says in the same tone as her boyfriend and felt a little ashamed of herself for talking like they were and could see a couple of people looking their way.
"It's okay, I'm not telling you off, but just stay quiet until we go outside, it won't be much longer." Mike then states in a serious but calm tone, he wasn't angry at them and knew they weren't trying to be rude, but they did need to be quiet now and to his relief he could tell that they understood that.
"He's going to say something?" Lily then asks in a surprised tone and despite just being told to be quiet, she couldn't help herself after seeing who just walked out in front of everyone with a bit a paper in his hands.
"Mike, he shouldn't..." Tobias then quickly starts to say as he looks up to his uncle, but stops after seeing the look on his face and knew that he needed to stop talking.
"Your brother knows what he is doing Tobias and he needs to do this." Mike states as he gives his youngest son a sad smile, before turning to watch his eldest son standing nervously in front of the coffin and couldn't help but be a little worried, he knew what Tobias and Lily were talking about earlier and while his eldest son had listened and stopped blaming himself completely, he also knew that he still felt guilty and he was really hoping he wouldn't bring it up now and try to apologise, because it really wasn't the time or the place and wouldn't help anyone.
"I'm not really sure what to say..." Mitch begins to say, before pausing as he looks around the room and can't help but freeze a little and despite everyone telling him that it wasn't his fault, he knew the truth and he was struggling to cope with the guilt. "I've known Jim for a long, long time and we've become very..." He then starts to say in a nervous tone, after just about managing to compose himself, but at the sight of Wesley standing up, he couldn't help but trail off and stare in concern at the angry expression on the boys face.
"I know you have to do them Sweetheart, but you also need to give your body a rest after what happened and a day or two without doing your stretches, isn't going to do you any harm." Sarah states in a soft tone, as she gives her son a warm and comforting smile.
"You did say it hurt and felt sore afterwards Matt." Ben then says in a slightly guilty tone, as he blushes a little at the look on his fiancé's face and knew he was betraying him a little bit, even if he was just looking out for him.
"Is that true Matthew?" Sarah then quickly asks in a serious tone, as she uses his full name, just to let him know that she wanted the truth, even if she felt a little guilty for doing so, he was her son and she wanted to make sure that he was looking after himself.
"It hurt a little and I was... am a little sore, but I didn't know it would be like that and I er... well it's not my fault, I do my stretches everyday, it's like er... well I just do them without thinking." Matt responds in a slightly emotional tone, due to his mums use of his full name and his fiancé telling her about his stretches hurting him and even though he never told him not to say anything, he still felt a little betrayed.
"I know you do Sweetheart." Sarah responds in a sympathetic tone, as she realises just how hard it was for her son. "I'm sorry for being over the top Sweetheart, but I'm your mum and you're the most important person in my life and it's my job to look after you and keep you safe, even if it annoys and frustrates you sometimes." She then adds in a warm and caring tone, before reaching out for his hands and smiles as he lets her take them into her own.
"I know Mum, but I er... well I..." Matt then begins to respond in an unsure tone, before feeling his fiancé gently nudge him in the ribs." Okay, I will wait a couple of days to do my stretches again, but I'm still going to do stuff, I'm not just going to sit or lie down all day." He then states in a slightly sulky tone, after realising that he was fighting a losing battle and that his mum was right, although he was still annoyed with his boyfriend, well not really annoyed, but he wanted a few cuddles and kisses from him later to make it up to him.
"I think there are a lot of boys in the world who would be happy to be told to take it easy by their mum Sweetheart, so I would make the most of it, if I were you." Sarah then decides to say, as she smiles sweetly at her son, before gently pulling him up from the sofa and cuddling him.
"Well I think there are a lot of parents who would be happy to hear their child wanted to be active and not sit around and do nothing all day." Matt retorts with a grin, after enjoying the embrace for a few moments and pulling away enough to look into his mums eyes.
"You're too smart for your own good sometimes Sweetheart, but I still want you to take it easy and no more arguing." Sarah responds with an amused smile. "Don't be angry with Ben either, he's just worried about you and we still need to make sure he is okay as well." She then whispers into his ear, after pulling him back into her arms and cuddling him warmly.
"I'm not deaf." Ben then states in a slightly annoyed tone, although as both his fiancé and his fiancé's mum look at him, he couldn't help but smile at their expressions, even if he didn't like being talked about like that, especially when he was sitting right there.
"I'm sorry Honey, but how are you feeling and please don't pretend that you're okay." Sarah responds in a caring tone, as she slowly lets her son go and focuses on him and couldn't help but notice the sadness in eyes and was hoping he would open up and not try to hide how he was feeling.
"Please Ben, you would... well actually you did used to tell me to be honest and now it's your turn." Matt states with a little grin, as he realises that his fiancé had always told him to talk about his feelings and he knew that there was no way he could try and get out of doing the same himself now and from the little roll of the eyes his fiancé gives him, he knows he is right.
"I keep seeing you just laying there Matt, I know you're okay and what happened now, but I didn't know when I found you and I know how it felt to think you were dead and... and... and I can't... Matt I can't forget it and I don't know what to do." Ben then just about manages to say, after trying his best to put into words what he was going through and is grateful when he feels his fiancé pulling him into his body and cuddling him, because he was now shaking and he could feel tears in his eyes.
"Oh Honey." Sarah then says in a sympathetic and sad tone, as she kneels in front of the boy and takes his free hand into both of hers. "I won't lie and tell you I know how it feels, but I think if you talk about it and let us listen, we might be able to help you get past this and I know Wesley's dad won't be available, but we can take you to someone else and they can help you as well." She then states in a calm and soft tone, as she gently strokes his hand and gives him a reassuring smile.
"You can see that woman your dad took you to yesterday." Matt then decides to quickly suggest. "Or we could try someone else, we can decide tomorrow." He then quickly adds, after feeling his fiancé tensing up and giving him an embarrassed look, which instantly let him know that there was no way he was going back to that one again.
"Come on Honey, just talk to us, it will help you feel better." Sarah then decides to say, as the boy remains silent and just gives her a sad look. "Would you prefer me to go away and for just you and Matt to talk about it?" She then asks in a slightly reluctant tone, after giving her son a quick glance and while she wanted to stay, she knew this might happen and as long as he talked to someone, then it was all that mattered.
"Talking doesn't help, I thought it would, but I told Matt and Tobias and we talked for hours and I still can't stop it, it won't stop." Ben states after a few moments of silence, as he looks at his fiancé's mum with a mixture of sadness and fear, he just wanted to be better, but every time he closed his eyes or even looked at his fiancé, he not only saw his dead body, but also felt the feelings that came with it and it chilled him to the core every time.
"Talking does help, it just takes time and it's hard, I know it's hard Ben, but it will help, you just have to keep doing it and doing it, because it does help, I promise." Matt quickly states with a loving smile, after taking his fiancé's face in his hands and turning it to face him. "You haven't used your punching bag and stuff either yet and we can do that later." He then adds with a comforting smile, before leaning in and giving him a loving kiss.
"It isn't going to go away overnight Ben, it's something that will take time and there will be things that work and things that don't, but I remember a young boy refusing to leave his boyfriends side when he was in hospital, no matter how much he tried to push him away and just supported him and made sure that he wasn't alone and that boy was so strong Ben and you're still that same person, it's just now you need a little bit of help and you will get past this, I promise Honey." Sarah then decides to say from the heart and smiles sweetly at the young boy, who to her brief concern was now starting to cry, but she quickly sees a small smile appear on his face and realised that they weren't sad tears.
"You can do this Ben, just talk like you did last night and just tell us what you're feeling and it will help, I promise." Matt then states in a sincere and loving tone, as he uses his fingers to wipe away his fiancé's tears, before giving his mum an appreciative and proud smile.
"Okay, but... but no interrupting, okay." Ben responds in a firm tone, after giving them both a sad and vulnerable smile and even though he didn't want to talk about it, they had both made good points and he really did want to get better and after seeing them both nod in agreement, he starts to talk and explain everything that was going on inside his head.
"Wesley, you promised." Carter quickly says in a quiet tone, after getting up and standing in front of his boyfriend and blocking his view of the older boy.
"Wesley, sit down right now." Colin states in a firm and slightly embarrassed tone, as he gets to his feet and gives his son an expectant glare.
"He has no right, he has no fucking right to talk about Jim, no..." Wesley quickly begins to say in an angry and venomous tone, before trailing off for a few moments, as both his parents stand in front of him. "He did it, he fucking..." He then begins to say, before feeling himself being pulled away and to his surprise, it was his boyfriend and not his parents.
"Shut up and come..." Carter states in an angry tone, as he tries to pull his boyfriend away from everyone, but instead finds himself being pushed backwards and he couldn't help but stare at his boyfriend in surprise.
"I don't fucking..." Wesley then begins to say, before feeling himself being turned around again and coming face to face with his mortified looking mum.
"Don't you dare use that kind of language Wesley Fisher, this is a church and this is your brothers funeral, show a little respect and sit down." Mary states in a stern and angry tone, as she looks at her son in shame.
"Listen to your mother Young Man, you're grounded for a month, don't make it any worse for yourself, now sit down and behave yourself." Colin then states in an almost disgusted tone, as he looks at his son and shakes his head in disappointment.
"Please Wesley, just calm down, remember what we talked..." Carter then tries to say, as he tries his best to stop his boyfriend ruining everything, but is quickly cut off as his boyfriend turns to him coldly.
"I don't fucking care, now why don't you fuck off Sissy Boy and leave..." Wesley then sneers in a hateful tone, before feeling himself being turned again and this time slapped across the face and can only stare at his mum in shock, as she stares equally as shocked back at him.
"Hey, don't you ever hit him again, I don't care what he said, you're his mum for gods sake." Mitch then states in an angry tone, after seeing what the boys mum had just done, but as he puts himself between them, he can't help but be shocked by Wesley's reaction.
"I fucking hate you Mitch, you killed my fucking brother, I hate you, I fucking hate you." Wesley states in a distressed tone, but as he turns around to run away, he almost knocks his boyfriend over, who he could see was just staring at him. "Get out of my way Sissy Boy." He then says coldly, before catching his boyfriends eyes and despite what was happening, he couldn't help but recoil at the hurt in them.
"I... you... how could you..." Carter only just manages to say, as he stares at his boyfriend heartbroken, he didn't think anything his boyfriend said to him while he was going through so much could really hurt him, but he was wrong and he was just too stunned to fully process what this meant and barely even registers his friend pulling him into his arms and cuddling him or his parents standing over him now.
"Wesley Fisher, you're coming with me right now and you should be ashamed of yourself." Colin states in an ashamed tone, as he puts a hand on his sons shoulder, but is surprised to feel him shrug it off.
"You never loved me, you're a shit parent, both of you and I HATE YOU ALL!" Wesley then shouts out, before turning around and is about to run away, when he sees his boyfriend crying in their friends arms, but he is too angry and upset to really register what it meant and quickly runs down the aisle and towards the exit.
"I don't think it's a good idea, he won't talk to you." Mike states in a hesitant tone, as he puts a hand on both of the boys parents shoulder. "Trust me, he needs to cool off, he's been through a lot and it's not his fault." He then says in a sympathetic tone, as he sees both their expressions and knew they wanted to go after their son.
"He's our son Mike and it doesn't matter what he's been through, there's no excuse for that kind of behaviour." Mary responds in a mixture of embarrassment and anger, as she thinks about what her son had just done and couldn't help but feel ashamed of him and a little ashamed of herself for actually slapping him, she had no idea what had come over her and had regretted it instantly.
"And if you go to him thinking like that, then he will just get even angrier and more upset." Mike then says in a calm tone, as he tries to stop them from making a mistake.
"We can't just let..." Colin then begins to say, before looking over in surprise as he is interrupted and sees who it is.
"Mitch will go find him Colin and he can get through to him, because Mike is right, there is no way he will respond to either of you right now and you both need to be here for Jim." Erica states in a sympathetic and understanding tone, as she tries her best to help calm the situation, while also doing her best to ignore the fact that everyone in the church was staring at them in shock.
"He hates me, how am I meant..." Mitch then begins to protest, as he realises what his girlfriend had just suggested and while he wanted to go and he had actually turned to go, he was definitely not the right person to go after him right now and couldn't help but be surprised that she would even suggest it.
"He worships the ground you walk on Mitch and you will get through to him, now go and don't make me tell you again." Erica quickly interrupts her boyfriend, before giving him a quick peck on the cheek and a little nudge in the shoulder.
"Go Mitch." Mike then states in a warm tone, before turning back to Wesley's parents and doing his best to console them.
"Okay." Mitch responds in am unsure tone, before turning towards the exit and quickly making his way out of the church, while trying his best to not look at all the people staring at them all.
"You let him go?" Jarred can't help but ask in a surprised and nervous tone, as he stares at his friend suspiciously after taking a glance at his phone.
"Unlike you, I'm not a fag Jarred, sure it was fun messing with him and stuff, but it was getting old fast." Ryan responds casually, as he smirks at his friends expression and while he was a little nervous, especially since he knew the police had questioned his friend about something, he wanted to play it cool.
"I'm not a fag you fucking prick and you better not be telling other..." Jarred quickly starts to protest, before being silenced by his friend talking over him and he couldn't help but feel a little vulnerable.
"Yeah, because getting hard ons when you fight or wrestle with another boy is totally not gay and playing strip poker with a boy you kidnapped is totally normal behaviour for a straight guy Jarred, totally." Ryan states teasingly, while smirking at his friend and while he was only messing around, he knew he wasn't far off, especially from the look on his friends face now and even though he couldn't care less if someone was gay, it didn't mean he couldn't have a little fun.
"Fuck you Ryan, you get a hard on from just sitting in assembly, we can't control our dicks and you know it and as for Peter, I told you already, it was part of my plan and it worked." Jarred then quickly retorts in a defensive tone, as he sits up and glares at his friend, who he was starting to worry about a little bit, because he was definitely acting strangely and he didn't like it at all.
"Okay fair point about the random boners, but seriously, part of your plan? Fuck off Jarred, it's not even your plan, it's some pervert paedophiles plan and when was the last time you even spoke to the freak?" Ryan responds questioningly, as he enjoys the fact that he was in complete control of his friend and wondered if he should either ditch him soon or show him who the real boss of the group was.
"He's er... he's..." Jarred then tries to answer, but as he struggles to come up with a response, his friend quickly interrupts him.
"He's a convicted paedophile Jarred and as for your 'plan' working, the only thing that worked was you and Peter sitting naked in front of each other, yeah great plan Straight Boy, great plan." Ryan states in a mocking tone and openly laughs as his friend glares at him with his hands clenched into fists. "Yeah sure, attack me, that will look really good for your 'plan' of pretending you're hurt, yeah great plan Jarred, you've already had the police question you and it would just be great if they found out that you're not even that hurt." He then adds in the same tone, before getting off from the edge of the bed and walking around to his friends side.
"You... how... how do you know about the... the police talking to me?" Jarred can't help but ask in a nervous and stunned tone, while giving another glance at his phone, as he forgets about his friend mocking and taunting him and focuses on the police, because he hadn't told him and no one else should even know about it.
"Because you just confirmed it Fag." Ryan answers honestly and with a satisfied grin, as he looks at his friends expression and knew that he had him rattled and was beginning to wonder if he could have a little fun like he had had with Barry, even if he did get bored of it quickly, it would be fun to knock him down a peg or two for a couple of days and find out if his friend really was gay and what he could make him do.
"Don't call me that, I'm not a fucking faggot Ryan, so fuck off." Jarred quickly states in an angry tone, as he stares at his friend coldly, but while he was trying to act tough, inside he was reeling a little, he didn't want to be gay, he didn't like the idea of any of it, but his friend seemed intent to keep bringing it up and he was scared that he wasn't just messing around and if he wasn't messing around, then he had obviously noticed something, even if he didn't know what that something was, he wanted to fuck girls and have girlfriends and he hated faggots, but he couldn't deny he had thoughts, disgusting thoughts and his friends words were starting to get inside his head.
"Sure, Jarred, whatever you say mate." Ryan responds in an amused tone and enjoys his friends reaction for a few seconds. "So what did the police ask you?" He then asks in a more serious tone, although he tries his best to sound as casual as he can, he was sure he was safe and with the deal he forced on Barry, he was even more sure, but his friends revelation about Conner's involvement was unsettling and despite what he had done to Barry and what he was even contemplating doing to his friend, he was disgusted by the paedophile and he wanted nothing to do with scum like that.
"Not that it really matters, I already told you the plan and the consequences for me Ryan, but they were asking about where I was when Alex's house was attacked, who I was with, if I knew who Barry was, that kind of crap, nothing major or official, but they definitely suspect me, but it's obvious they had nothing, otherwise they would have made me go to the station." Jarred answers honestly and while their conversation had rattled him and his friend had got inside his head, he was glad of the change in topic and the fact he now knew the police suspected him, was oddly relaxing, because he knew from day one that the truth would come out, but he also believed he had done enough with Peter, to make any punishment he received minimal and even if it was a little worse than he expected, just seeing Alex's face when he realises that Peter hates and fears him now, will be completely worth it and he couldn't help but smile a little bit, before giving his phone another glance and wondering how long it will be before it rings.
"How can it not fucking matter? Did they ask about me?" Ryan then quickly asks in a nervous and anxious tone, his friend may have accepted he was going to face consequences, but he hadn't and if his friend had fucked up and his name was on the polices radar, then he was going to make his friend pay and it would be worse than anything he made Barry do.
"Oh fuck off Ryan, we had a deal and no, they didn't ask about you, so just relax." Jarred answers with a slight smirk, his friend had been cocky and annoying since he came in the room and it was nice to see him looking nervous and unsure of himself.
"Fine, but I still think you're being a moron, I mean I thought your plan was okay, I mean, I don't think the kidnapping thing was a good idea, but Alex is going to freak and he deserves it, but getting yourself in a world of shit for it, well that's just retarded Jarred and the fact you got this idea and plan from a paedophile is... well... it's just really weird and you're fucking crazy, you know that." Ryan then states in an honest tone, he was definitely on board with knocking Alex down a peg or two and he had no problems with hurting him or Peter, but the kidnapping was a little out there for him and the fact a paedophile was involved, just made him feel uneasy about the whole thing now.
"Whatever, shouldn't you be going anyway." Jarred responds in a dismissive tone and while his friend had a point, he didn't know everything about the plan and couldn't help but glance at his phone again.
"Nice, really nice Faggot." Ryan quickly responds with a grin, as he gets up and walks towards the door slowly, he was still worried about how this was all going to turn out, but he was also still having fun at his friends expense and the more he thought about it, the more he was convinced that he was actually right about him.
"Just fuck off Ryan." Jarred calls out, just before his friend opens the door and walks out and despite getting pissed off after hearing him obviously laughing, the sound of his phone ringing, quickly gets his attention and he couldn't help but smile nervously, as the next part of the plan was about to begin. "Hey Peter." He then says in a calm tone, as he answers his phone and waits for the other boy to process who he was talking to.
"Are you okay?" Tobias asks in a soft tone, as he continues to hold on to his friend and while he had stopped crying, he could feel him still shaking and gives everyone a sad look.
"I... I don't want people to... I just want to sit down." Carter just about manages to respond, he knew people were staring at him and he didn't like it, his boyfriends words had cut him deep and he wanted to go home, but there was something keeping him there and even though he didn't understand it, he was at least going to sit back down and hide from everyone's stares.
"Okay Carter, you can sit with your dad and I over..." Michelle then begins to say in a soft and sad tone, as she gives her sons hand a reassuring squeeze, but as she is interrupted, she can't help but give her husband a sad look.
"No... no... I want to sit at the front... I want to sit with Tobias." Carter then almost shouts out in protest, before pulling his hand out of his mums hand and pushing away from his friend. "AND STOP LOOKING AT ME!" He then shouts out in an emotional tone, as he glares at everyone in the church, before taking his friends hand and pulling him back to where he was sitting with his boyfriend a little while ago, leaving his parents looking stunned.
"Give him some space, he's just upset and lashing out." Erica then decides to say, after looking at the young boys now sitting down and then seeing the boys parents expression and could tell that they didn't know what to do now. "Just sit down and he will be okay, Tobias will look after him." She then adds in a reassuring tone, after seeing that her first attempt to reassure them had failed.
"She's right Ian, just take Michelle and sit down and just give him time to pull himself together." Mike then decides to say, as he gives his friend an understanding look.
"I know." Ian responds in a strained tone, before giving his friend an appreciative smile and leading his wife back to where they were sitting before.
"Colin, Mary, you should sit down as well and just try not to talk to Carter, he just needs some time to think about everything and Tobias will help him." Erica then says in a slightly unsure tone, as she turns her attention to Wesley's parents and could see that they weren't sure what to do either.
"Thank you Erica." Mary responds in a stunned tone, as she still tries to process everything, before feeling her husband holding her hand and leading her back towards their seats.
"Lily, you don't mind if I sit with you and Mike, do you?" Erica then asks in a soft and caring tone, as she looks down at the young girl with a sweet smile, after realising that she didn't have anyone to sit with and with Tobias comforting Carter, she didn't want her to be alone, well not alone because Mike would be next to her, but she knew they hadn't really spent much time together.
"Tobias would want you to sit with him Lily, but there won't be enough room and he will want to be with you as soon as possible, so I think it's only right that we look after you, until he can come back over." Mike then states in a soft tone, while trying his best to not sound patronising or saying something to upset her.
"I know, but I er... okay." Lily responds in a distracted tone, as she looks over to her boyfriend and despite everything, she couldn't help but just be proud of him and the way he was caring and comforting his friend, just made her feelings for him even stronger and she just hoped she could support and comfort him, the same way, when he came to her later on.
"He will be fine and you will be fine as well Lily, he loves you." Erica then says in a quiet tone, as they take their seats and while she wasn't completely sure what the girl was thinking, she knew it had something to do with Tobias and she thought it was sweet of her to be worried about him.
"So what you're saying, is that I was right?" Matt asks in a cheeky tone, with a grin to match it, as he and his fiancé head towards the pool house hand in hand.
"You're so annoying." Ben responds with a shake of the head and even though he tries his hardest, he couldn't help but grin a little bit, before frowning again as he hears his fiancé giggling.
"So you admit that I was right?" Matt then asks again, after seeing his fiancé again trying not to smile and when he looks at him and pouts, he couldn't help but giggle again.
"Fine, but I'm still way ahead of you." Ben then retorts with another shake of the head, after waiting for his fiancé to stop giggling at him. "Besides, you still owe me a blow job, so don't get any ideas about me owing you one, because I'm first." He then adds with a grin of his own this time.
"Oh don't worry, you will be first, but you won't be getting a blow job." Matt quickly retorts himself, before enjoying his boyfriends expression, after they both stop in front of the door and stare at each other.
"Oh no way, you owe me a blow job, you aren't just going to give me a hand job, no way." Ben quickly responds in an unimpressed tone, as he continues to stare at his fiancé expectantly, there was just no way he was going to let him change the bet, even if a hand job would be awesome, he wanted a blow job and he wasn't going to let him back out of it.
"You're so cute when you get horny." Matt then says in a teasing tone, before pulling his fiancé into his arms. "But I want you to make love to me." He then whispers into his ear, before leaning back a little bit from their embrace. "Unless you just want a blow job, I mean if..." He then begins to say with a grin, before predictably getting interrupted and knew exactly what his fiancé was going to say.
"No... no... I want..." Ben then quickly states in an excited tone, before frowning a little bit. "You're a fucking dumb ass, you know that." He then states with a small smile, after realising that his fiancé had just baited him and he had walked straight into it.
"If you keep saying naughty words, than your dick won't be doing any fucking." Matt then quickly retorts in a playful tone, before pushing his fiancé back and quickly making his way through the door and across the room.
"You're so fucking..." Ben then begins to responds in an excited tone, before falling silent as he follows his fiancé into their home and suddenly freezes.
"Oh come on, you can do..." Matt then begins to tease, after hearing his fiancé going silent, but as he turns to face him, his smile quickly fades. "What's wrong?" He then asks in a nervous and worried tone, as he slowly limps towards him and couldn't help but wonder what was happening. "Talk to me Ben, please." He then says in a half pleading tone, as he reaches him and could actually see him trembling.
"I... you were... I found..." Ben tries to respond, but as he stares past his fiancé at their sofa, he couldn't help but trail off and the thoughts and feelings that had started to disappear after talking about them for what seemed like hours, quickly returned stronger than ever and he was only vaguely aware of the fact he was wetting himself.
"Oh no." Matt says in a sad tone, as he quickly pulls him into a loving embrace. "It's okay, I love you and it's okay." He then says in a reassuring and soothing tone, while he gently rubs his back and ignores the wet feeling spreading between them, his fiancé had done this for him too many times for it to bother him.
"I found... Matt... I... I found..." Ben then tries to say in a distraught tone, as he tries to process what was happening, but he just can't and begins to cry.
"Sshh Ben, it's okay and I'm okay." Matt responds in the same soothing tone, as he tightens his grip a little bit more. "Ben, I'm sorry, I didn't know you hadn't been in here since er... well since then, but I'm okay and we're going in the jacuzzi remember, it's okay and I'm okay, I promise." He then says in a sincere tone, before loosening his grip a little bit, just to test the waters and see how his fiancé was doing and when he doesn't feel him trying to pull him back in, he backs away just enough to give him a kiss on the nose.
"Sorry for... sorry for being... a baby." Ben just about manages to say, as he feels his fiancé pulling away and despite still feeling sad and afraid, his embarrassment over breaking down was taking over and he just felt pathetic.
"Oh fuck off Ben and don't look at me like that." Matt then quickly states in a serious tone, as he gives his fiancé a hard look. "Seriously? Come of it Ben, how many times have I broken down and cried or got upset over something? So quit feeling sorry for yourself and let's go enjoy the jacuzzi, because I meant what I said when we were standing outside, even if you did pee yourself." He then adds in a slightly playful tone, as he tries to shock him into cheering up and despite being nervous about this approach, the little smile his fiancé was trying to hide, gave him a huge sense of relief inside and he quickly starts to grin.
"You're such a prick, I never made fun of you for wetting yourself." Ben responds in a sulky tone, although he couldn't help but smile and despite himself and how he was still feeling about thinking his fiancé had died, his fiancé just understood him and if anyone else tried to make jokes in this situation, he would have been angry, but his fiancé was different and he loved him with every fibre of his soul and he knew he loved him the same way back.
"Well you never used to stick your penis up my bum either, but if you hurry up and get the jacuzzi going..." Matt then begins to say in a sexy tone, before purposely trailing off as he gives his fiancé a quick peck on the lips and then turning and limping towards their bathroom, knowing that he would follow him.
"I love you Matthew Walker." Ben decides to say from the heart, after slowly walking behind his fiancé, they had talked about their surnames a few times now and while they sort of agreed with what they both wanted, he really did love saying it and it just felt right.
"I love you too Benjamin Walker." Matt responds in a surprised, but happy tone, as he stops and looks at his fiancé lovingly, he was still not sure if he would take his fiancé's name, but it did feel good and the more he heard it, the more it felt right and he was seriously thinking about talking to his mum about it and seeing what she thought, before suddenly remembering where they were and quickly gives his fiancé a sexy wink before limping into the bathroom.
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