Puppy For Sale
Chapter 7 - I Give You my Dream, Now Make it Come True
"Ok, well the test results come back this morning and they tell us that Max Chase is indeed your father."
Just like that, just like that, just like that! My mind fizzed!
It was like everything in the world went to sleep on hearing those words. A huge feeling of satisfaction rushed through my being. I felt vindicated in some way, putting aside all the doubt that had been presented to me. However, satisfaction gave way to a feeling of pure triple distilled shock and suddenly it was like a plug in my stomach had been pulled out and everything rushed to my large intestine.
"I really need to go to the toilet," was all I could say as I ran out of Mr Watson's office to the nearest bathroom.
Without going into detail I felt everything solid and liquid come rushing out of me in a huge wave of spasms which was quickly replaced by relief. Again, I wanted to cry, but my body wouldn't let me. All this time I never gave up hope, never stopped believing and now it was confirmed.
Max Chase was my father!
I was consumed in a whirlwind of thought as I slowly took some paper and wiped my bottom clean. As I got up from the toilet I suddenly didn't know what to do with myself. Pushing down on the cistern to flush I walked over to the small white sink and turned on the tap. I looked in the mirror at the face that Max would soon see and wondered what he would think of me. Would I be everything he expected? But what would he expect, if anything at all?
I splashed my face with cold water to try and compose myself. With my eyes shut I blindly reached for the paper towel dispenser on the wall and ripped a few sheets out before drying my wet skin. It was time to go back and see what was going to happen now.
I took a deep breath and left the bathroom scooting back to Mr Watson's office. He was still sitting in his chair while Sam Stillworth had made his way over to the window to get some air I presumed.
"Everything ok puppy, you looked in a mighty rush when you left." Mr Watson asked, before taking a sip of coffee which must have arrived while I was… away.
"I would rather not talk about it. So what is going to happen now?" I asked, prompting Sam to turn round and look at me.
"What would you like to happen Puppy, this is now your show from what I can see."
"I don't know Mr Watson, I was so eager to meet Max, but now I know I feel suddenly nervous about the whole thing."
Doctor Stillworth walked towards me and placed his hand on my shoulder. "Puppy, you have been living here longer than anyone else. In that time you have got used to routines and with that I imagine it's a scary feeling to now suddenly think about change. After all, this place has been all you have ever known. My advice and I'm sure Mr Watson will agree, you need to take your time with this. Go at your own pace and know that everyone here is with you and will support you in finding out what you want to do next."
I looked at Mr Watson. "Do… do you think I should meet him?"
Watson smiled. "Puppy, I can't make that decision for you, but remember this is what you wanted. I think once it sinks in then you are going to have that feeling back where you want to meet him, but like Sam said, do it at your own pace. I very much doubt Max is going to go anywhere, after all it sounds like he's waited a very long time to find you."
It was all I could say. For a week I had it clear in my head that when I found out Max was my dad the first thing I wanted to do was meet him and now? Now it just feels too much to deal with.
"Would you like me to call him?" Mr Watson asked.
"Does he know… I mean about the results?"
"Not yet, we didn't want to tell him just in case it was something you wanted to do."
"Really? You would really let me give him that news?"
"Well, he your father Puppy, we wanted to at least give you that option, but if you'd prefer I can make the call and tell him."
"Can I think about this, talk to Cindy?"
"Of course Puppy, like we said, this is your show now, just don't leave it too long ok, I would imagine Max… your father, is just as eager to know as you were."
"Yeah, yeah of course. So can I go now?"
"You can." Watson said, giving me a warm smile.
I nodded, thanking Mr Watson and Sam before starting to head for the door. "Oh and Puppy?" Mr Watson called.
I beamed a smile and left without saying a word. Hurrying down towards my room I almost tripped down the stairs and broke my neck. I was so excited. I rushed through the corridors creating a breeze that washed over me I was running so fast. I zoomed past my room to Cindy's and was about to knock when I stopped just short. In all my glee I suddenly wondered how she was going to feel if I burst in her room all excited. After all when all was said and done, whatever happened, she was still going to be here, possibly alone.
I toned down my body language and gently knocked on her door. "Come in," she called from the other side. I turned the small brass knob and pushed open her door. She was laying on her front waving her feet about slowly while on her bed.
"Hey you, what'cha doin'?"
"I'm reading the encyclopaedia on cats."
"Yeah, I found it in the library, it's really interesting. Did you know that when a cat quivers its tail around your legs it's his way of greeting you?"
"Really? Hmm, well having never had a cat I can't say one has ever… well quivered around my legs."
"So where have you been? I come by the recreation room as you said you would be there but there was no sign of you."
"Yeah, I erm… Cindy would you put that book down for a moment please?"
"Sure, Puppy, you wanna talk about something, are you feeling unbalanced?"
"No, no, it's nothing like that," I said, deciding to take a seat on her bed. "The reason I wasn't in the rec room was because Mr Watson called me to his office."
"Are you in trouble?"
I managed a light chuckle. "Why do you always think that?"
"Do I need to answer that?"
"No, I guess not. Look I was there because they got the test thing back."
Cindy suddenly became very focused on me and got into a seating position on her knees. "Oh wow, so… so what was the re_"
"Max Chase is my dad Cindy," I said cutting her off, just wanting to get it out.
"Oh my god Puppy, that's like… oh my god, I'm so happy for you," she said, suddenly throwing her arms round me tightly.
"Yeah… yeah I guess it is," I replied, a little distracted by her reaction.
"You guess it is Puppy?" she asked, pulling back and staring me in the face. "This is wonderful news and you act like you don't care anymore, what gives?"
I sighed deeply. "It's not that Cindy, you know it's not, its… it's that… it's you and me, I mean, what happens to you and me?"
A solemn look came over her face; it was an expression that killed me to look at. I knew she was excited for me, but I knew inside she was sad. I hated it when she was sad.
"When I think about you sleeping at night Puppy I wonder about all the dreams you might be having about finding a family. I know how long you have waited; I've seen you look out of that window in my room and waited… searching. You are so brave Puppy Stibbs, and I love you so much. But to see you happy means I can let you go, because, I love you enough to let you go." She softly said, placing a finger on my chest as the last sentence came out.
My eyes started to sting as my objecting emotions failed to stop wetness develop in my eyes. From that second on I was officially heartbroken, heartbroken because I saw a future where she was alone and I was no longer here to protect her.
"You are the most beautiful loving girl I have ever met. Your sweet smile, your kind nature… why are you still here Cindy, why?"
"Maybe because you needed me, and maybe because I needed you." She said, as a lone tear streaked down her soft face. She didn't know, but I saw the faint look of despair that came from those eyes. I looked deep into her soul and found it yearning once more, probably already starting to feel alone and abandoned. How could I do this? How could I break this chain that was us?
I needed to think!
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