The Boys of Nodaway Ridge
"It is useless to attempt to reason a man out of a thing he was never reasoned into."- (Swift)
The American Legion Hall was half-way down the main drag about a block from "Maude's Café" in one direction and a block from the "Crusty Cup Tavern" in the other direction. The white store-front building housing the Legion was once one of two hardware stores in Nodaway Ridge that went out of business long before I arrived. The Legion membership pooled their resources, bought the property, and remodeled it into a meeting place, tavern, and restaurant.
The long narrow building, with the kitchen in the rear and bar along the wall, kept a few permanent tables for patrons toward the front and a small lunch counter for those who didn't want a table. People had to walk through this portion of the hall to access the larger meeting room and separate bar. The restrooms, one labeled "Pointers" and the other "Setters," served the meeting room and small restaurant. The restaurant served short order food – hamburgers, pizza, and other delicacies, except on Friday nights when they served up a fish fry and Wednesday nights when they had a "Wing Ding". A "Wing Ding" is an "all you can eat" chicken wings, deep fried, crispy, piping hot, and delicious. It was those two nights the few tables in the front were supplemented by long, folding, paper-covered tables, with folding chairs opened, to accommodate the many people who came to dine and drink. The meals were simple, cheap, and all profits went back to the Legion coffers. The Legion, in turn, contributed to community activities and the summer baseball program. Maude generally closed her café those nights since there was no way she could compete; besides, she enjoyed the time off!
When Frank and I finally wound our way through the front portion of the Legion to the back, the big room was already beginning to fill up. A line of tables along the wall were laden with casseroles, sandwiches, salads, desserts, pickles, potato chips, and other items; all contributed by friends and members of the community. Paper plates, plastic cups and flatware was provided by the Legion. Large garbage cans lined with black plastic bags were placed strategically throughout the Hall for use when people finished their meal. The bar was open, beer only, for those who wanted a "cold frosty" with their meal. The Legion didn't charge a rental fee so made up for any costs through the sale of alcoholic beverages. Jenny didn't know, since Jeremiah was an active member of the Armed Services when killed, the profits of the alcohol sales that day would go to her and her little ones. It "was the least we could do" one Legion member, face dripping with tears for a fallen comrade, proclaimed to Grandpa Harris.
After we filled out plates, we joined Frank's Mom and Dad, my Mom, and Grandpa and Grandma Harris, all seated together, at a table near the back. Frank and I sat where we could be involved in the conversation but also where we could observe who was coming and going through the door to the room. We would nudge each other, under the table of course, when one of us spotted what we thought was some cute guy walking in and spread a thumb and forefinger on the table with an estimate of the size of the unseen cock hidden from view by the guy's pants. It was a game Frank and I played since - like forever, and we enjoyed it!
Sammy, seated at the family table, rose and instead of heading toward Frank and I, walked through the lines of tables toward the front and restrooms. We followed him with our eyes to see where he ended up and saw him stop and talk to the young man who sang at the service. The young guy smiled at Sam and mentioned something to the woman next to him; Sam smiled back, and said something to her in return. She was much lighter in complexion, rather than the light brown shade of her son.
The young man stood and followed Sam out the door.
"Looks like Sammy is going to make a new friend," I mused softly to Frank.
Frank leaned over, whispering in my ear, "I hope that kid has a big cock and a pile driving ass, because that's what Sammy loves."
As I was about to comment, Uncle Andy, Mom's youngest brother and Chief Deputy with the County Sheriff's Department, walked in the entrance, looked around, spotted us, and headed in our direction. I found a chair for him and placed it at the table. After he stopped at the head table and offered his condolences to Jenny and then to Jeremiah's parents and family, he filled a plate and joined us.
"Thought we'd see you at the funeral," Grandma Harris commented.
"I was on my way but dispatch had a call for us so I ended up at Pete Montgomery's place in Johnson Hollow. Pete was pretty well tanked up and in one of his "the government's spying on me" crazy kind of moods and had barricaded himself in his house, armed with a shotgun in case some evil spirit tried to sneak up on him."
"By the time I arrived on the scene, the Sheriff and two other deputies were already there, guns drawn, and ready for a siege. I mean, it's not like we don't go through this at least a couple of times per year. I asked the Sheriff if I could handle the situation and he quickly agreed. He'll be coming up for re-election in the fall and really didn't want to shoot anyone at risk of offending a voter somewhere. In fact, the Sheriff doesn't do anything to offend a voter because he never does anything."
Frank and I settled back, anticipating an exciting or least funny tale of close encounters with the crazy and loopy kind of folks sometimes found in the hills, namely Pete Montgomery. Uncle Andy approached the house, identified himself, and shouted for Pete to throw the shotgun out, come on out, and stop the nonsense.
He told Pete if he did they'd go for a cup of coffee. According to Uncle Andy, Pete shouted back, "Oh, yeah? Last time you said that, we ended up in Central City for coffee at the hospital. While I was drinking my coffee some asshole snuck up and gave me a shot of some sort, so go stick it up your butt." He really didn't say "stick it up your butt" as Uncle Andy told us later, but to "go fuck yourself." Uncle Andy informed him it was anatomically impossible to do what he ordered, but would welcome the equipment to do it.
Andy shouted back, "Pete, I told you last time, after we got you home, if you tried this stunt again, something nasty was going to happen to you. Now, give it up and come on out. We won't go for coffee this time, maybe a beer or something."
"Well, Pete didn't respond in a very civil manner, so I opened the trunk of my squad, gathered up a gunny sack and my snake stick, walked around behind Pete's house to the wood pile, found what I was looking for, and returned. I meandered up to the window, shouted one last time for Pete to come out and when he didn't, I tossed the sack in through an open window."
"I tell you true, folks; there was the most God-awful screaming coming from the house just before the shotgun, followed by Pete, rocketed out that open window. He took off like a striped-ass ape for the Sheriff's squad, screaming I should be arrested for attempted murder by snake. I walked up to the squad, peered in, and told him if pulled this shit again, the snakes wouldn't be in the bag."
"Where did you get such an idea?" questioned Grandma.
Uncle Andy pondered a minute, looked over at Frank, whose head was bowed trying to stay inconspicuous, and responded, "You know, Momma, I just don't really recollect, but it seemed like a good idea at the time."
I remembered and so did Frank, although neither of us was about to spill the beans right now. In sixth grade, a new girl, Becky Frederickson, daughter of a new agricultural agent in the county, took a real fancy to Frank, not that it would do any good since he was mine and I was his, but she persisted. She pinched his butt, tried to play kissy-face with him, and continually grabbed at his crotch. We couldn't go out for recess without her panting after Frank.
One day, after school on the bus ride home, Frank said to me, "I've had it with Becky. She keeps wanting to play with my cock; well, I'll let her play with alright."
The next morning, Frank was a little late in coming out on the playground for recess. I was standing next to the sex fiend waiting for him. Frank sauntered out through the north door of the school and Becky got all giggly and goofy-eyed. He walked up to us and before Becky could pinch his butt or lunge for his crotch, he looked her straight in the eyes and asked, "You still want to play with my snake?" and started to unzip his britches.
Becky was near beside herself with excitement. She beat Frank around behind the school and stood there waiting, a big grin on her face; I think that meant she wanted to! Frank walked up, as cool and calm as I've ever seen him, eyed her up one side and down the other, and said, rather low and sexy-like, "Close your eyes and give me your hand." Becky's eyes snapped shut like a sprung mouse trap and her right hand shot forward faster than a frog's tongue nailing a fly. He took her hand, pulled it forward to his crotch, and whispered, "You sure you want to do this?" Becky's head bobbed up and down like a ditty pole with a catfish on the end. "My snake is kind of big around and long, so don't get frightened."
Frank unzipped his pants the rest of the way and thrust his crotch into her waiting hand allowing the big bull snake he'd stuffed into his pants before coming out to recess to slither out through his fly onto Becky's palm. Needless to say, the results were catastrophic, for Becky that is! As she galloped around the building and across the playground heading for the school entrance, Frank looked at me and said casually, "You know, Nate, I didn't know a sixth grade girl could scream that loud or piss that much!"
Honest to God, that had to be the funniest thing I ever saw in my life! I asked Frank where he found the snake. "I saw it out near the chicken coop a home a couple of days ago, so when I went home yesterday, I caught him. I put it in my lunch box and brought him to school. Just before recess, I carted it down to the boy's restroom, dropped my pants, and let the snake wrap itself around my waist. Pulling up my pants to secure the snakes resting place, I went out to the playground. By the time Becky Boo reached out her hand to feel my dick, that snake was more than eager to get out, especially since I'd loosed a couple of bodacious farts only moments before, making the snake a bit uncomfortable."
I was still smiling to myself remembering the event, when Uncle Andy stood, tossed Frank and me a wink and a smile, gathered up his used plate and plastic utensils, and gave Grandma a kiss, announcing, "I've got to get back to work. A couple of the deputies are off sick so we'll all end up working some overtime, except the sheriff."
Uncle Andy had been employed by the County Sheriff's department since he returned from active duty with the army, serving in the military police. He'd worked his way up from patrol duties to Chief Deputy. This was the fourth County Sheriff he'd worked for. None dared to dismiss him since he was so popular throughout the county; Uncle Andy was fair and understanding, but tough and the people appreciated that.
Working for the county was good work, if you could get it, and the pay was far better than anything in Nodaway Ridge. Uncle Andy was lucky, but he worked hard at his job and created his own luck. There just weren't that many opportunities for employment in the area, unless a person drove to Central City or to Keokuk. Fort Madison was just too far to drive, but the prison there offered some employment, if you wanted to live in Fort Madison during the week and drive home on weekends. Those who ended up in Fort Madison to work often changed residence and just stayed there.
We were fortunate Momma had a nursing degree and was able to work at the hospital in Central City. It was a fair drive, not as far as Keokuk, especially during bad weather, and the pay wasn't that great, but it helped pay the bills and we were better off than most of the families in Nodaway Ridge. The older people, the widows and widowers, the die-hard bachelors, and those many others who were unemployed, most times had to really scrimp and save just to afford food and medicine. The river and surrounding countryside, along with gardens, helped many of them get through the hard times of winter.
After Uncle Andy left, Frank and I sat and visited awhile and finally excused ourselves. We both were damned curious where Sammy and his new found friend disappeared to. I'll be damned if we could find any trace of them around the Legion Hall or in town. We figured the new found friend must have a hiding place we weren't aware of, which is unusual since Frank and I were familiar with every nook and cranny, in addition to each other's personal ones, throughout this part of the county. Sammy's friend just had to be "one of the boys" or Sammy wouldn't have taken off with him. It certainly piqued our interests!
I figured Mom and the rest of the family would be at least two hours before they made their way out of the Legion Hall and drove on home so I suggested to Frank we head on out to the house ahead of them. It'd give Frank and me some time together without any interruptions.
Once in my bedroom, I locked the door and allowed Frank to lead me to the bed. Smiling seductively at me, he nuzzled my neck, brushed his soft, moist lips across mine, and then carefully, delicately probed my oral cavity with his tongue, encountering mine, welcoming his intrusion. Unzipping my pants, slipping his hand into my boxers, encountering my stiffness greeting him in a state of anticipation, he slowly secured it and slipping the foreskin up and down over the leaking head, masturbated me gently but effectively, preparing me for the main event.
He knew what I knew and we knew what we were going to do; that dance of love with Frank leading the waltz of velvet steel into my waiting and eager dance hall. Sliding my pants and shorts off while he undressed himself, I willingly stretched out on my back, legs spread wide, inviting his now lubricated pleasure pole to prod and tingle that special place reserved for him. Once in position, leaning forward as he eased into me, I wrapped my legs around his waist and secured my lover to me for our mutual, sensual act of love. When we came, we came together, reaching my climax, tightening my anal ring around him, bringing him to a gushing, moaning, final thrust into me!
The Literary works of Nicholas Hall are protected by the copyright laws of the United States of America and are the property of the author.
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