Backdoor Slider - A Love Story
by Joe L
I'm intentionally late to football practice. This is my first one since I've come back from New Foundations. I'll probably have to run laps, but that's exactly what I want. I just want to be alone and run around the track. The thought of being around the team makes me nervous... as nervous as I've been about anything so far since we've been outed. I'd like to just walk around, unaffected. I want to act like being gay isn't a big deal, and it shouldn't be. However, it really is, especially to high school students.
I head to my locker, passing several teammates who just look to the cement floor as they walk by. Most of the team is already out on the field, so I take my time getting in my practice gear. I'd like them to be comfortable around me. I don't want things to be awkward. I'm the same guy I've always been, but not to them. I sit at my locker staring into space, thinking about the last couple of days since I've returned.
The entire time at school has been surreal. I feel like I'm living in some melodramatic teenage movie.
Luke and I have turned into campus celebrities, especially to the girls. They all want to know what I went through at New Foundations. They want to talk to us, they want to invite us to parties, they want to go shopping with us... it's way too much to handle. I'd rather go back to New Foundations than have to hang out with a bunch of girls in a mall. Plus, all of that stuff takes up valuable sex time. I'm sure none of them know what it's like to have such an amazing sex life.
The worst part of being the center of attention for a bunch of girls is that they really want Luke and me to have PDA's on campus in front of everyone. They want us to hold hands, hug, kiss, or do anything together. They want us to perform for them. A couple of the girls told us they wanted us to kiss so they could "get their lady-boners on." I don't even know what that is, but it sounds disgusting. So far, we haven't even come close to touching each other at school. Maybe someday, when we're both a little more comfortable with it, and everyone else is a little more comfortable with us, we could hug or even hold hands a little. I would love to feel Luke's thumb caress my hand at school as he holds it while we are just standing around at lunch or between classes. I start to feel all warm inside just thinking about it.
The funniest part of this whole situation is the reaction from the boys, or at least some of them. I guess I'd always thought that if I was out in high school, I'd constantly be called "faggot" and relentlessly harassed. I feel guilty that Miles and other kids like him have to go through it because so far, I haven't had any problems. Most of the guys just treat me like my teammates. They just stare at the ground when I pass them. Maybe they're afraid that if we make eye contact, they'll catch "the gay"... or maybe they think that I'LL think they're gay and try to jump their bones... because all gay guys are attracted to 100% of the male population. It's so fucking stupid.
However, there are a few guys who I catch looking at me... actually more like staring at me. Sometimes, I even catch them wide-eyed and open-mouthed. I bet they're picturing what it would look like if Luke and I were together. I have to admit, I picture that a lot, myself. I have a lot to draw on. I've heard a liberal estimate that about 10% of the population is gay. Based on the number of boys I've caught staring at me, that estimate might even be a little low. At first I would flash them a knowing smile, but it totally flustered one kid to the point that he dropped his books and bumped into a wall. I don't want to out anyone or make anyone uncomfortable, so I've decided to just let them stare and imagine as much as they want. I get the real thing.
Luke hasn't had any problems with anyone yet, either. Everyone seems to think it is so romantic how he rescued me from New Foundations. I do too, but I still give a lot of the credit to Denise and my mom. Even some of the teachers have congratulated him.
Luke has playfully and masterfully retracted his comments from when he was denying the rumors. Everyone always melts when Luke talks to them, anyway. He's got them in the palm of his hand. People ask him if he and I are really together, and he confirms it with that Luke smile. Yesterday, someone asked him in front of me at lunch and he said, "Yep, he's my guy." I felt that bolt of electricity shoot through my body with those words. I almost died right on the spot.
The best was when Luke and I were approached by Justin and Nate, our old best friends. I hate to consider them old friends or former friends. I love them to death, and I'd do anything for them. It's just that since Luke and I started working out, the four of us didn't spend much time together, and since Luke and I officially got together, we hadn't even seen Nate and Just outside of school, even once. Now, Nate has a girlfriend and poor Justin is the odd man out. However, he's still the nice, funny guy that I remembered. It won't be long for him. Maybe we can all hang out again once baseball season starts.
I keep running yesterday's conversation with them through my head, and I can't help but smile.
"So you've only been a couple since April?" Justin asked, as if surprised.
"I can't believe it took you guys that long to finally get together!" Nate laughed.
"Hey, it ain't easy makin' that first step." Luke said, squirming. My face felt like it was on fire. I never thought I'd be having this conversation with my best buds.
"No need to be embarrassed, dude. We cool." Nate vigorously rubbed the top of my head. It made me feel much more relaxed.
"Maybe we should've pushed the two of you together. We knew a long time before you guys," Justin turned to Nate. "Remember when we thought Luke was going deaf?"
"Huh?" Luke and I asked in unison.
"EXACTLY," Nate continued after the two of them shared a laugh. "Whenever Just or I would say something to Luke, he'd be like, 'Huh?'. It happened all the time. It was like he could never hear anything we said. We actually talked about it in private and we were thinking about asking Luke to get a hearing test. Then, we realized he wasn't going deaf cuz he could hear you, Garrett. After a while, we realized that he was always paying attention to you no matter what was going on... Even if we were talking to him, he was always focused on Garrett."
"I don't remember any of that," I said. I must've been totally oblivious to everything at that time. I was so busy inside my own head, trying to hide my feelings from the guys. I wasn't paying attention to anything that was going on around me. I sure wish I had been.
"Yeah, it took us a while, but we eventually figured it out. He would like, hang on your every word. He only liked the food, the music, the movies, the athletes, the whatever... that you liked," Justin said. I looked at Luke, wondering if it was true. I can't believe I didn't notice anything.
"I guess I just wanted to impress you," Luke said, smiling and leaning up against the building with his arms crossed. I wanted to kiss him so bad.
"I just feel so dumb. Apparently, I was the only one that didn't realize you were hot for my bod," I said, causing an eruption of laughter from Nate and Just. I looked at Luke, hoping I didn't embarrass him. As Nate and Just were distracted with laughter, Luke used the opportunity to silently mouth words to me.
"I am SO hot for that bod," he said slowly, with that sexy smile. I wish I could've taken him home right then. "Okay, so I'm fully embarrassed," he continued out loud. "So when did you guys realize that G was hot for me?"
"Aww, you call him G? That's so sweet!" Nate pinches me on the cheek, and I shove him.
"Well, G just ate it all up," Justin turned back to me. "If Luke was paying that kind of attention to me, I'd have been creeped out. I'd have been like, 'Back up, son!'"
"Sorry, Just. You're not quite as cute as G," Luke said. I could feel my face turning red again.
"Yeah, you guys were just so into each other. There were times when I thought you were just gonna start makin' out right in front of us," Nate said.
"Damn. I was so clueless." I looked at Luke, as he was enjoying my embarrassment. I guess I did remember Luke paying lots of attention to me. I wished I could go back in time and have some clumsy, fourteen-year-old sex with him.
"Hey, did that school counselor guy find out about you guys?" Nate asked, and Luke and I looked at each other in amazement.
"Yeah, he figured it out. How did you know?"
"Well, he talked to both of us," Justin said, "and he was asking a bunch of questions about you guys after you strangled that kid."
"I remember," I roll my eyes.
"I swear, we totally played dumb. We didn't tell him anything! It was obvious what he was getting at, but we weren't even sure you guys were together at that point. I mean, I could totally see Garrett strangling some dude for Luke five years ago," Justin said.
"Yeah, we were together then, but just barely. I guess you could say that emotions were running high." Luke tried to pinch me, but I dodged it.
"Well, we really are glad the two of you are finally together and happy. If anyone gives you any trouble, you come to Just and me." Nate made his tough guy pose.
"Yeah, totally. You can count on us," Justin nodded.
"Thanks guys!" We slapped each other's hands and went our separate ways.
On our drive home, I tried to get some more info out of Luke.
"So, you only like the things I like to impress me?" I asked with a raised eyebrow.
"Back then, kinda... I was hoping to see some kind of spark... some kind of green light."
"I never gave it to you?"
"Sometimes, I thought so... then other times, I wasn't so sure. It was kind of a come-on then back-off thing with you."
"Just so you know, it's a come-on then come-on some more with me right now."
"I think I got that," he said, rubbing my crotch. "I was scared, though. I wanted you SO MUCH. I mean I still do... but I was scared that I could lose you for good. I wasn't 100% sure that you liked guys, but I thought you did... but there was still the chance that you weren't ready, and you'd just totally shut me out. I couldn't handle that... not even being your friend or anything."
"Okay, so I gotta make it up to you somehow. I'll have to think of something when I get you home in bed."
"I can't wait!"
"So what about now? Do you say you like things just cuz I like them?"
"Well... Let's just say I've acquired a taste for some of the things you like."
"Do you like sucking dick... really?"
"Are you kidding? I fucking LOVE it! I could suck your dick ALL DAY... all slow and juicy." He started sucking his index finger to show me.
"Okay... I believe that. What about cum? Do you really like– Okay, stupid question."
"I just want to make sure you're doing what you want in bed. I mean, I could do anything, as long as I'm with you. I have no idea if you're the most selfless lover or the most selfish lover or somewhere in between. Everything you do makes me cum anyway, so I'm all good."
"I'm the same way. I have to admit at first, I kinda let you take the lead. I didn't really know what to do, and it seemed like you had put a little more thought into it. I just wanted to kiss you SO BAD. I just felt the rest of the stuff would come naturally. Then, after a few days, all I could think about was fucking you. I just wanted that sweet ass.... GOD DAMN! I can't keep talking about this stuff or I'm gonna cum before we get home. Run that red light!"
"It's still just as hot as ever, isn't it?" I said, finally pulling into his apartment complex.
"Fuck, YEAH. You make me feel SO GOOD, G."
I helped him as best I could from the car to his bedroom, but he didn't need much help. We both plopped in his bed, not being able to breathe or think before we could lock our mouths together. I quickly wished I had gotten out my clothes, but there was no turning back now. I was totally in the moment, loving Luke and being loved back so intensely. I came SO hard in my shorts just from the kissing, but there was no helping it… no escaping the feeling. Luke did the same, and we eventually pitched our cummy clothes onto the floor as we finally were able to wriggle out of them. We spent the next few hours taking turns fucking each other. It had been a while since I gave it to him, and he still loved it just as much as he always did. He gets a special kind of smile when I'm plowing him that he never quite gets otherwise. I need to take a picture of it.
I was able to hold his legs up in the air without putting too much pressure on his bad foot. It looked like it was flopping around quite a bit as I was drilling him, but it didn't seem to bother him. He was in the zone.
I can't believe that I'm going to be able to do this every day. Denise insisted that I stay with them while my folks straighten out some things. I bet it's driving my dad crazy that I'm over here getting sodomized all day and all night. I think it's clear that he's the one that's going to have to change, now.
I realize I've been sitting at my locker daydreaming for over ten minutes, and I've worked up quite a hard-on. I head over to the bathroom and jerk off in a stall, making sure the cum plops right on my abs for an easy clean-up.
I jog out onto the field and am told to take my expected five laps for being late. I start to run the track, minding my own business. I can feel some of the players staring daggers at me. Oh shit, I have completely forgotten about Cade! I'm just going to have to get a different holder. I can't take his shit. It's too bad because he's finally getting the snaps right and holding the ball perfectly. I don't want to have to go through this with another new guy. We have a game tomorrow night. I try to glance around to see where he's standing. I spot him easily because he's watching me run around the track, shaking his head with a wicked smile. I try not to look at him again because I'm sure he'll think I'm ogling him.
I eventually finish my laps and head over to where I practice my kicks. Cade is waiting for me there with crossed arms, still shaking his head.
"Garrett, Garrett, Garrett," he starts his disappointed mocking.
"Cade, I've been thinking. It's probably best if you're not my holder anymore."
"No, no, NO!" His immediate refusal surprises me. "We're both still Mustangs, Garrett, and what's best for the Mustangs right now is for you to kick and for me to hold. We have a shot at making the playoffs, and we're both important parts of the team."
I guess he knows that if I don't want him holding for me anymore, he won't get to play at all. Maybe this will work out somehow.
"Okay, Cade. We can still do this. I would just REALLY prefer not to talk about anything personal."
"Okay, Okay. But please, just answer one question," he says, kicking some dirt out of his cleats.
"WHAT?!?" I snap. If he asks me something like "Who takes out the garbage and who makes dinner?", I'm going to deck him.
"Why didn't you give that place a chance? I mean… the place your dad sent you to. They could've helped you... if you just listened to what they had to say."
I stare daggers at him, seeing if he will crack. Either he's being totally sincere, which means he's stupider than I thought, or he's saying the one thing that he knows will make my blood boil. I look for the slightest upturned corner of the mouth or squint of the eye to tell me it's the second, evil explanation, but I never get it. I guess I'm dealing with a complete idiot.
"Cade, if you don't already know the answer to that, I don't think there's anything I could say to make you understand. You just don't get it." I say, turning away from him.
"Come back! Never mind, never mind! Forget I said anything," he nervously says, holding a ball in place for me to kick. He really still does want to be my holder.
"No more personal stuff, okay?" I ask, turning back.
We finish practice in silence. Luckily, I don't have to be around the other guys and I quickly leave the locker room without showering. I race home to Luke's, or my place, as it is officially now. I actually have to go back to my folks' house for dinner tonight, though. It's the first time I'll have to see my dad and David since I was sent to New Foundations. That should be interesting... and horrible. However, I have enough time for at least a couple of cumshots up my ass. I hurry home and scamper up to Luke's bedroom, ready for some action. I see him lying on his bed, doing homework and listening to music. He looks upset.
"What's wrong babe?" I ask. I don't really want to know. I just want to jump in his arms.
"It's nothing... I mean, it's something... I guess I shouldn't have expected it to be THAT easy." He hands me a piece of paper. "This was stuck in my locker today. It BEGINS."
I unfold the note and read it. It says: "Don't think you're gonna take over this school, faggot. You're fucking dead."
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