The Life of Matt Summers, Part 5
by Flaming Matt
"Ben, are you in here Ben?" Carter asks as he slowly shuts the toilet door behind him, although he didn't really need to ask as the sound of someone being sick was a pretty clear indication that he was. "Fucking hell Ben, what have you done to yourself?" He then asks as he opens the stall his friend is in and can see that he had missed the target at least once and was almost kneeling in his own sick.
"Fuck off!" Ben then says, but before he can do or say anything else he is sick again.
"Have you been drinking today?" Carter then asks as he watches his friend being sick and couldn't help being confused because his friend had told him it was just the night before and there was no way he could still be drunk and he knew Matt would never let him come to school like it.
"Just fuck off you cunt." Ben then says, this time almost hissing as he turns to his friend and Carter can't help but give him a sad look, it just reminded him of his uncle so much.
"Ben you can either talk to me or I can go and find a teacher to come and make sure that you're alright." Carter then states after deciding that he had to take control of the situation and hopefully either shock his friend into paying attention or scare him into it.
"I didn't mean to drink the rest of it." Ben then says as tears roll down his face, but it takes Carter a few moments to realise what his friend is saying and is just about to respond when he sees him turn back to the toilet before being sick again.
"How much did you drink Ben?" Carter then asks as his friend slowly gets to his feet, although he had to help him avoid covering his trousers in the sick that was all over the floor.
"Almost a whole bottle." Ben responds as he half stumbles over to the sinks with the help of his friend.
"How big was the bottle?" Carter then asks, although he was trying to test his friends memory and concentration more than actually needing to know how much he drank, it was obvious he wasn't drunk right now, but had enough to obviously make him sick.
"I don't know, but I had like three glasses last night and I drank the rest this morning when Matt and Tobias weren't in the room." Ben answers before splashing some water in his face.
"So how many glasses did you have this morning?" Carter then asks, deciding to figure out just how much he had drunk, knowing for some adults one bottle would be enough to get them very drunk, so he could only guess what it would do to a twelve year old kid.
"Almost two I think." Ben answers before taking a few gulps of water from the tap and spitting it out, although he has to repeat it a few times to get rid of the taste of sick.
"Why did you do it though?" Carter then asks, he knew he was firing a lot of questions at his friend, but he was happy to see that he wasn't getting angry or irritated by them and took that as a good sign that he was getting back to himself.
"It makes the pain go away." Ben answers honestly, he couldn't really explain it any better than that and didn't really know what that actually meant, he just knew that when he drank the wine and got drunk he didn't feel all the bad things he had been feeling recently and he wanted to feel like that again.
"What do you mean?" Carter quickly asks in a concerned and slightly scared tone, he wasn't expecting his friend to say something that would reassure him about drinking, but what he did say definitely worried him even more than he already was.
"I don't know." Ben answers as he gives his friend a sad look, he wished he could explain it and if he could, maybe he could fix himself, but all he knew was that when he drank the wine he felt better than he has been feeling recently.
"Ben you're going to have to try harder than that, because this is serious and I'm going to have to tell someone." Carter then states in a firm and serious tone, he knew it was risky to talk to his friend like this and remembered how his uncle used to get defensive and angry whenever he was confronted, but he just hoped because his friend had only started the night before, he wasn't going to be like that yet.
"Carter I just feel sad and angry all the time." Ben then says as he tries again to explain how he is feeling, but like before he just couldn't put it into enough words for it to make sense.
"What do you feel sad and angry about?" Carter then asks in a caring tone, he got the sense that right now his friend wanted to talk, but wasn't sure how to say it and hoped if he prompted him enough, he could help him figure it out.
"I feel angry at David and Mr Jones and I want to hurt them Carter and I feel like I failed Matt and I know it's stupid, but I just can't make it stop." Ben responds and just gives his friend a scared look, he just didn't know how to make it stop, well actually he did but he knew that he couldn't keep doing that and just hoped his friend could help him.
"Shit Ben, we all want to hurt those bastards, but Mr Jones is dead and David might as well be where he is going, but you're being a complete moron if you think you have failed Matt, he is alive because of you and you know that I'm right." Carter then states in a firm tone, but he knows that his words aren't going to do much and just hoped he could think of something that would.
"I know Carter, but it doesn't matter how many times I tell myself that, the feelings just get worse and the only thing that made them go away was the wine." Ben responds with the same sad tone and expression from before and Carter can't help but feel sorry for his friend.
"What about when you feel sad, what makes you sad?" Carter then decides to ask, he couldn't see any point in trying to convince his friend not to be angry and hoped maybe the sadness thing was something he could actually help with.
"Matt's broken and it just makes me sad to be around him, but I get sad when I'm not around him so I don't understand what is happening or what to do." Ben answers honestly, he was still struggling to understand it all, but he was feeling a little better now that he could at least put it into words and was hoping it was a sign that he could get better.
"Well first of all you need to stop drinking, it might feel good now but it won't be like that for long and it will just make you worse." Carter suggests as he moves closer to his friend so that he could hold his hand. "You also need to tell your dad how you're feeling and maybe go and see Wesley's dad for a while." He then adds in a soft and caring tone and just hoped his friend listened.
"But they will all hate me for being so stupid." Ben responds and pulls his hand away from his friend, he just knew they would call him a baby and just tell him to grow up.
"What are you talking about?" Carter quickly asks in a confused tone, he couldn't see how his friend would think they would react like that and wondered just how bad his friend really was.
"Matt gets molested, raped and tortured and he is dealing with it and I'm just being pathetic for no reason and they will hate me." Ben answers before attempting to push past his friend and run away, but is surprised to feel himself being pulled around and backed up to the sinks facing his friend.
"You need to just stop Ben, if this was the other way around and I just told you exactly what you have told me just now, what would you say and do?" Carter asks in a serious tone, although his heart was racing a little, he was just as surprised as his friend looked, at pulling him back and into the sinks.
"I know Carter, I FUCKING KNOW ALRIGHT!, but I can't stop it and it's stupid and it makes no sense, but it won't stop." Ben then says in an angry and distressed tone, he knew he was being stupid, but his mind was just telling him all this stupid stuff and he just wanted it to stop.
"You're probably depressed Ben." Alex says and sees both boys jump a little as he walks out of the stall he was in, he had heard everything, but had hoped they would go away without knowing he was there, but despite the reason he was in their alone, he couldn't stop himself from wanting to help them.
"What the hell are you doing in here Alex?" Carter asks in a surprised and concerned tone, he knows what Peter had said about his friend was probably true, but he couldn't help feeling a little nervous and despite the fact he would normally feel safe with his friend by his side, he wasn't sure how much help he would be in his current condition.
"It's none of your business Carter, but Ben is depressed and he should go see your boyfriends dad to get himself sorted out as soon as possible." Alex responds in a neutral tone, although he did feel a bit stupid and knew he should apologise for what he had done to the small boy.
"Oh fuck, you heard everything." Ben then says and can't help but be scared that Alex would tell everyone.
"Relax Ben, I won't say a word I promise, but you really need to see a doctor because you can't keep going the way you're going right now." Alex responds as he walks over to the sink next to the other two and starts to wash his hands.
"How do we know you won't go and tell Jarred everything and spread it around school?" Carter then asks in a suspicious tone, he just couldn't let himself drop his guard around the boy and could tell that his friend wasn't thinking straight enough to be of any help right now.
"Jarred is a prick Carter and were aren't friends any more and my older cousin killed himself because he was depressed and I would never do something that might make someone else do that." Alex answers honestly and surprises himself by revealing something like that to two people he barely knew.
"I'm going to die?" Ben then asks in a scared tone and couldn't help but shake a little.
"No, well not if you go and see a doctor as soon as possible Ben, I mean I just heard what you two just said, so I don't have much else to go on, well except what has happened to Matt and well it sounds like yours has just started, so it should be easy to fix, but you have to go see someone Ben." Alex answers as reassuringly as he can, although he might have done a better job if he wasn't being distracted by Carter and the little voice inside his head telling him to apologise for what he did.
"This is just so weird, I mean I get it and I understand, but it's like my brain doesn't want to listen, what do I do?" Ben then asks as he looks at the other boy expectantly and Carter can't help but cross his fingers and just hope that Alex isn't messing around and playing some sort of sick game with his friend.
"Carter you need to tell his dad or brother, fuck tell your boyfriend and his boyfriend as well, because he isn't going to do it and as his friend you have to do it for him." Alex then states as he turns to the smaller boy and almost manages to apologise, but he knew he had to concentrate on Ben for now and just hope he doesn't chicken out of it in a few minutes.
"I will." Carter responds, but can't help but look at the other boy curiously, he could swear he can see a little shame in his eyes and wonders if he was really playing some sort of trick or if something else was going on.
"I want to get better." Ben then says, although he knows the other boy is right and he can already feel himself coming up with excuses not to tell anyone and even ways he could stop his friend from saying anything.
"That isn't always enough Ben." Alex says before turning to the smaller boy. "Carter he is going to probably try and persuade you to not say anything, but if you don't want him to do something stupid eventually, you need to tell someone as soon as you can, no matter what he says to you." He then states and almost places a hand on his shoulder, but just stops himself from moving his hand.
"I will and thank you Alex." Carter responds and attempts to give him a appreciative look, but he can't forget what he had done to him and instead turns back to his friend.
"Look Carter, it's probably too late but I'm sorry for what happened before and I don't want to be friends or anything with you guys, but I know I should have stopped it and Peter has been giving me shit about it ever since and well for what it is worth, I'm really sorry and if I could go back I would have never even let it start, let alone take part in it and well sorry." Alex then states in a sincere tone, he really was sorry and even though he did want to be their friend, he knew it wasn't likely and he would rather not get his hopes up.
"Were you hitting me as hard as you could?" Carter then asks, which catches Alex off guard, he wasn't expecting that kind of question.
"No, no where near to be honest, but does it really matter Carter? I still hit you and even if they weren't as hard as they could have been, the speed I was hitting you would still have hurt you and I knew that." Alex answers honestly, he knew he could have lied and tried to make himself look a little better, but he really felt ashamed of himself and he didn't want to take the easy way out.
"Is it true that you stopped Jarred and the others from beating up Peter and stripping him?" Carter then decides to ask, he wasn't sure if he was going to forgive him enough that he wanted to be friends, but he wanted to make an effort for Peter's sake and thought if he asked a few questions it might help him decide.
"He told you about that?" Alex asks in response, he couldn't believe he would have told anyone else about that and couldn't help but be surprised.
"I will take that as a yes then." Carter then says, before turning back to his friend to make sure he was alright.
"I'm okay Carter, just keep doing whatever it is that you're doing and we can head back to class." Ben then says, he may have some big issues to deal with, but he could tell that his friend was trying to figure out if he could trust Alex and it also meant that he could have a bit more time to think about what he had just been told and try to get his head around it.
"Are you gay Alex?" Carter then decides to ask as he turns back to him, he knew it was a very personal question and a little out of order, but he felt that if he was ever going to be able to trust him, then he would know by his reaction to the question.
"What?" Alex asks in a surprised and shocked tone, he couldn't believe he just asked him that and didn't see how he could possibly know, unless Peter said something, but he knew he wouldn't do that to him.
"Are you gay?" Carter repeats, although he was now regretting the question and felt like a complete jerk, not just because it wasn't a question he should be asking, but he realised that he might think Peter told him and he didn't want to get him into trouble.
"Did Peter say something?" Alex decides to ask and doesn't hide the fact that he is angry and moves a little closer to the smaller boy.
"Back off Alex, I might be fucked up in the head right now, but you touch him and you will regret it." Ben quickly states as he hears the anger in the boys tone and sees him moving towards his friend.
"Shit sorry, I wasn't going to do anything Ben, but what the hell kind of question is that to ask." Alex quickly says in a slightly cautious tone, he may have been on the boxing team and could fight, but he wasn't going to take someone like Ben on and especially when he knew he was unpredictable right now.
"Well just back off a bit." Ben responds and gives his friend a quick nod as the boy backs over a few steps.
"Did he say something though?" Alex then asks again, but is more careful to not sound as angry as he feels, he couldn't deal with Peter telling people he was gay, he was the one person he trusted the most and it would be hard to get over if it was true.
"Not really, I just picked up on something he said and I doubt if his life depended on it, he would know that he had given any hint towards it Alex, but are you actually gay?" Carter then asks after answering the question honestly, he was completely sure that Peter had no idea what he had given away and wanted Alex to know that.
"He is such an idiot sometimes." Alex then says, but just as he sees the smaller boy is going to say something, he decides for the first time to just be honest about his feelings, to someone other than Peter. "But I love him, he is just the best person I know and well I guess that makes me gay." He then states and although he isn't feeling amazing and wanting to jump up and down in happiness, he does feel relieved at actually telling someone else and can't help but smile a little bit.
"You do know he is straight though right?" Ben then states, he had been thinking about whether he really was depressed or not, but he couldn't help but take notice of what was just said and couldn't stop himself from joining in the conversation.
"Well yeah, well he isn't completely straight Ben." Alex responds, but can see the confused look on his face straight away. "Okay so he will probably turn out straight, but he isn't really anything right now and well either way I still love him and well you never know." He then says, although even as he says the words he knows that he will never be with his friend how he wants to be, he had seen the way he looked at girls and the reaction he had to them, but he didn't care and was happy to be his friend.
"Are you sure you're gay though, maybe you just think you love him like that." Carter then asks, he didn't really know anything about Alex, but it was a little strange that he was in love with someone he knew was going to be straight.
"What?" Alex asks in a confused tone, he wasn't sure what he as on about and how he could just think he felt that way.
"Well maybe you just love him like a brother, I love Matt and Ben and would do anything for them, but I don't love them like I do Wesley and maybe you just love Peter that way, I mean have you two done anything together, you know like fooled around?" Carter explains and can't help but warm up a little to the boy and despite still not sure if he wanted to be friends, he could understand why he was the way he was if he as confused about who he actually was.
"I tried kissing him once, but he wouldn't let me and got a little angry." Alex answers, but can't quite think straight as the smaller boys words repeat in his head.
"Well do you fancy other boys?" Ben then asks, although he knew the question was flawed as he didn't fancy any other boy except his boyfriend and he was gay.
"Not really." Alex answers, although he was just getting more and more confused and had never really questioned if he was gay, he just loved Peter and that is all he went on.
"So taking Peter out of the equation, who do you like to look at more girls or boys?" Carter then asks, he was a little concerned about his friend as he seemed to be fine for a few seconds and then just go silent with a sad expression, but he also felt like he wanted to help Alex and while they were alone now, he knew there wasn't going to be a better time to do it.
"I don't know, look it's nice that you're being, well nice to me, but come on Carter you're never going to trust me and Wesley will punch me for even talking to you right now, so just sort Ben out and make sure he doesn't end up doing something stupid and I promise to never bother you again." Alex states instead of answering any more questions, he was starting to get too confused and needed to be alone to think and while he appreciated the help he was getting, he didn't want to waste their time and give himself false hope that he had been forgiven.
"Wesley won't punch you and well maybe I don't trust you right now, but thanks for apologising and well come over and talk to us with Peter a few times to see how it goes." Carter then suggests after deciding to give him a break and while he still wasn't sure if he could be friends with him, he thought he would at least try.
"Just get him some help and well I will speak with Peter about the other stuff." Alex responds before looking at both boys and deciding that he had enough and walked towards the door.
"Thank you Alex." Ben then says as he watches him open the door.
"Just don't do anything stupid Ben." Alex then says before disappearing out of the toilets and heading to his next class.
"You won't tell them about this when they come visit later right?" Ben then asks as he pulls on his friends arm, so that they are facing each other.
"I have too Ben, you heard what Alex said and I don't want you to hurt yourself." Carter responds in a caring tone, he might have caved in and just kept his mouth shut, but Alex's words were still fresh in his mind and he knew he had to tell the others.
"I just don't want to upset Matt today Carter." Ben then says, but while his mind was coming up with all sorts of excuses, he knew that he needed help and couldn't keep it from his boyfriend. "Just don't tell any one until after school Carter, please, I just want Matt to enjoy being at school again and you know this will ruin it." He then says, almost pleading and Carter almost caves again, but he knows he can't risk it.
"Ben you need help and it's just going to be one excuse after another." Carter then states, deciding to be firmer and let his friend know that he is not going to keep quiet.
"Then tell Wesley at break time, but don't say a word to anyone else until Matt goes home, that way Matt's day doesn't get ruined and with Wesley knowing, there is no way I can keep you both quiet." Ben then suggests and Carter can't help but smile at his friend.
"Ben do you promise to see Wesley's dad as soon as you can get an appointment?" Carter decides to ask, he was hoping his friend will say yes and not try to make up an excuse.
"You can ask Wesley to phone him and see if he can see me tonight if it will make you feel better." Ben then suggests and again has to ignore the voice in his head telling him to not do it, he knew he had to beat this and be strong for his boyfriend and he wasn't going to let him down.
"Oh wow, alright I will ask him." Carter responds with a grin, he just couldn't believe his friend was being so cooperative and thought that Alex must have been making it sound worse than it was. "So are you ready to head back then?" He then asks, he knew that it must be close to the end of the lesson and wanted to get seeing their teacher out of the way with as quickly as they could.
"You go on ahead and I will just clean up a little in here, the floor is a mess and I want to make it right." Ben then says as he gives his friend a friendly smile.
"Okay sure, but don't be long because Mrs Johnson wants to have a word with us before the next class starts." Carter responds, before giving his friend a quick hug.
"I will only be a few minutes, but get going and I will meet you there." Ben then says and smiles as his friend starts to walk out of the toilet, although he had no intention of catching him up and knew that he had to get away from the school as quickly as possible.
"Bye." Carter then says as he walks out of the door and heads towards their classroom with a little grin, he was just so happy that he had helped his friend and knew that it would be all sorted soon.
"Shouldn't they be back by now?" Peter asks in a concerned tone, the class was almost over and he was expecting them to come back ages ago.
"They probably just decided to wait outside and not interrupt the class, Carter knows what he is doing Peter, so just relax." Wesley responds, although he had to admit that he thought they would have been back by now and as he looked at the clock he knew that the bell was about to ring.
"Okay boys, start putting your things away, the bell will ring in about a minute and I want you all ready to leave straight away." Mrs Johnson then states in a firm tone, normally she would let them leave at their own pace, but she wanted the classroom to be empty so that she could check Ben over and make sure he was feeling better before sending him off to the next class.
"Okay Miss." The class responds in unison, although Peter can't help but glance at the door and wonders if they really were just outside.
"Peter just relax and put Ben's stuff away so he doesn't have to rush about when he comes in." Wesley then tells his friend while packing his boyfriends things away.
"Okay class, I will see you all tomorrow and please be quiet as you leave." Mrs Johnson then says after the bell rings and she is pleased to see that they were all ready and doing as they were told as they exit the classroom.
"Hey Carter." Peter then says as he walks out of the classroom to see his friend standing just outside and felt himself relax a little, he was still a little worried about the fact they hadn't came into the classroom, but he was glad to see that his friend was right and that he was just waiting outside.
"Where's Ben?" Wesley then asks in a confused tone as he looks around to see that his friend was nowhere to be seen.
"He should be here by now." Carter says as he looks around nervously, he had just assumed it took a little longer than his friend expected to clean the sick off the floor, but he was now wondering if he should have taken Alex's advice more seriously, after his friend had still not appeared.
"Well where did he go?" Wesley asks as he looks around and can tell that his boyfriend is looking worried and wonders what happened or where their friend could possibly be.
"Shit, I'm so fucking stupid." Carter then states as he realises that he has really messed up and that his friend has done a runner.
"Carter seriously what the hell is going on?" Wesley then asks in a concerned tone, he could see that something bad was happening and just wanted to know what it was so that he could help.
"Shit er... Peter can you go and tell Mrs Johnson that Ben was sick and is going home please." Carter asks as he turns to his friend with a pleading look.
"Sure." Peter responds and although he wanted to stay and help, he could tell that something was happening and decided to just do as he was told and quickly turns back around and walks into the classroom.
"Wesley I think Ben ran away from school." Carter then tell his boyfriend, he knew that this was his fault and that Alex had warned him to not let his friend do something stupid, but he had let his own ego get in the way and left his friend alone and now he had no idea where he could be.
"You need to tell me what is going on Carter." Wesley then says, he was now really worried and although he didn't know what had happened, he knew their friend was acting strange all week and that they should have kept a better eye on him.
"Just come with me and I will explain on the way." Carter states as he takes his bag and begins to walk towards the nearest exit, he had no idea where to look, but he knew that his friend wasn't at the school any more and hopefully they could think of something as they looked for him.
"Okay." Wesley says as he quickly picks up his and his friend bag again and follows his boyfriend, who was almost halfway down the hallway already.
"Hey guys." Mitch says as he sees the boys approaching him and can't help but smile when he sees them holding hands.
"What are you doing?" Tobias asks as he stops in front of his big brother and wondered why he was just sitting outside.
"It's a nice day and I wanted to sit out here." Mitch answers honestly and can't help but smile at both boys when they give him a strange look.
"But you aren't even in the sun Mitch." Matt then points out, sure it was a nice day, but surely he would be sunbathing or something and not just sitting under the umbrella at the table.
"Well I already have a tan and it's just nice to sit outside sometimes, now enough about me, how are you two feeling now?" Mitch asks after deciding to find out how the boys were.
"Pretty good, it was fun to talk about what we used to get up to." Matt answers with a small smile, although he was a little unsure of how much he should say and decided to let his brother go into more detail if he wanted too.
"Me happy now, me remember what they look and I remember have fun with them too." Tobias then says in a happy and excited tone, he had cried and he did get upset, but remembering everything thanks to the pictures, just made him feel so much better and he really needed it after the night before.
"That's great Tobias and I'm glad that you're feeling better now." Mitch responds with a big smile and can't help but give Matt a proud look, the pictures were just what his brother needed and he was feeling really happy with how things were turning out.
"What time are we going to the school Mitch?" Matt then asks, he was starting to feel nervous about going there and a part of him wished that he could get out of it, he knew he had gone into town and shopping earlier in the week, but going back to school was a lot more daunting and there would be a lot more people around him.
"Well the lunch break is at one in the afternoon, so if we get there around half twelve then we can find a place on the field for you two to sit until the others come out and join you." Mitch answers with a smile, although he wishes he could be with them and see his brothers reaction, if any girls did go and talk to them.
"Wait, you aren't going to sit with us?" Matt then asks in a slightly panicked tone, he had no idea the older boy was going to leave them both to sit on their own and now he was definitely getting nervous about the whole thing.
"Whoa Matt, I will go with you to the field and sit with you for a little while, but I won't be staying with you." Mitch quickly responds, he could tell that he needed to reassure the boy as quickly as possible to avoid him panicking.
"I will be there too Matt and if he stays then no girls or other boys will come and speak to us." Tobias then says and although he knows he is being a little selfish, this was meant to be about him getting to meet some other kids and he really wanted to see some girls and despite knowing what his brother has been through, he didn't want it to spoil his chance.
"Okay, but Mitch you have to stay with us until I say you can go." Matt then states in a serious tone, although it was obvious to Mitch that the boy was scared and it didn't take a genius to know that he wouldn't let him go until the others are with him.
"Matt I will leave when I think that it's the right time and Tobias is right, the other kids will stay away if I'm there." Mitch responds in a caring tone, but he can tell that this isn't going how he had hoped and can't help but wonder how he was going to sort this out.
"Then I don't want to go, I can't do it Mitch." Matt then states, but is a little startled when his brother lets go of his hand and steps away from him.
"It's not fair, this was meant to be for me and you're ruining it." Tobias then states in an angry tone as he looks at his brother and before either Matt or Mitch can react, he quickly runs away towards the house and slams the back door behind him.
"I didn't mean to." Matt states as he looks at the house and can't believe that he had upset his brother and knew that he had let his stupid fear win again.
"I will talk to him in a minute Matt, but first you need to tell me what the hell is going on with you." Mitch then states as he gives the house a quick glance, he knew that if he could get Matt sorted, he could easily get his brother to calm down, but knew that it wasn't going to be easy to get to the bottom of what was scaring the frightened looking boy standing in front of him.
"I haven't been alone outside yet and there will be so many people around Mitch, it's just scary and I'm sorry, but it's not my fault I feel like this." Matt answers as honestly as he can, he just felt so pathetic and knew that Mitch would be keeping an eye on them, even if he wasn't sitting with them and it just made him feel even worse.
"Well first of all you won't be alone, you will be with Tobias and it will only be for like five or ten minutes before the others turned up and secondly, I may not be sitting with you for those ten minutes Matt, but I will be nearby and you will be safe." Mitch then states in a firm and serious tone, he knew it was important to sound confident and in control, while letting him know that he wouldn't actually be that far away from him when they do go to the school.
"I know, but none of you know what it feels like to be me and I try really hard to not get scared, but it's hard Mitch and I don't want to ruin things for everyone." Matt then says as he looks at the older boy sadly, he just wanted to be normal and it hurt so much that he could never be that way again.
"We know Matt, but Tobias doesn't mean what he said and you know that he loves you." Mitch then says and was going to say more, but his phone vibrating distracts him enough to stop talking.
"I want to go to school Mitch, even if I'm really scared I don't care, I'm going to do it for Tobias." Matt then states with a smile, he was still scared and despite a bigger part of him wanting to stay at home, he was going to put his brother first and also cross another thing of his list of things to overcome.
"That's great Matt, really great but why don't you go find your brother and tell him the good news, my phone is vibrating and I need to answer it." Mitch then states with a proud smile, he was really happy that he had come around and was not letting his fear get the better of him.
"Okay." Matt responds and starts to walk towards the house, when he quickly gives the older boy another look. "Thank you Mitch." He then says with a smile.
"Any time Matt." Mitch responds and returns the smile as his phone starts to ring again and can't help but be surprised when he sees who is calling.
"So where are we going Ben?" Alex asks as he walks beside him, he knew that he would try to make a run for it and decided to take a chance and wait just outside the nearest exit to the toilet they were in and just followed him as he had ran past.
"I told you to fuck off Alex." Ben responds in an irritated tone, he just wanted to be alone and think things through and instead he had someone he didn't particularly like following him wherever he went.
"So are we just going to keep walking until you get tired?" Alex then asks, ignoring any attempts he makes to try and make he go away, he can't say that he had any really loyalty to him, but at the same time after what happened with his older cousin, he just couldn't leave him alone and short of him knocking him out, there was nothing he could do to make him leave him alone.
"Just shut up." Ben states before walking a little faster and hoping that he would take the hint and leave him alone.
"Ben I'm on the boxing team and I keep fit, even if you were faster than me, it wouldn't be enough to lose me and I'm not leaving you alone." Alex then says as he matches his pace easily, although he could see that while no one was really close to them, they were being looked at curiously by a few people.
"Why won't you just leave me alone Alex?" Ben then asks as he comes to a stop and pushes him to the ground, he didn't care that there were some people nearby watching them, he was done playing nice and just wanted him to leave him alone.
"Because you shouldn't be alone right now and you know it." Alex responds as he gets back to his feet, normally if anyone did that to him he would beat the hell out of them, but this was different and he knew he had to just keep his cool, although being pushed gave him another idea and wondered if he might have been a little hasty in saying the other boy was depressed.
"I'm fine so just fuck off Alex, we aren't friends and after what you did to Carter I should just beat the shit out of you, but he made us promise to leave you alone, so just fuck off and go stare at Peter or something equally pathetic." Ben then states with venom and begins to walk away again and although the remark about Peter hurt, Alex started to think that the solution to the boys problems may be a lot easier than he originally thought, but he had to be sure first and was also aware that they were definitely drawing more attention to themselves.
"Fine, but I can't believe you're going to do this to Matt, after everything he has been through, you do this to him." Alex then states and instantly gets ready to defend himself, he knew what he just said would either get the other boy to see sense or get him angry enough to attack him, but he wanted to help and even if he did get beat up, it would be worth it if his theory was right.
"What?" Ben asks as he turns around in shock and Alex can't help but feel a little relieved that he wasn't going to get his head kicked in, despite still being sure it might be the best way to help him out.
"Ben when was the last time you got really angry?" Alex then decides to ask, he was now convinced he wasn't depressed at all and just had to try and think of a way to help him without having to take a beating and without having some of the people watching them at a distance come over and ask why they weren't in school.
"What?" Ben asks in a confused tone, he really had no idea what the other boy was on about and what he was trying to do.
"In the toilets you told Carter that you were angry and sad, well the sad thing you probably deal with and the fact you were crying proves that, but because you aren't dealing with the anger side of things, you will probably keep being sad." Alex explains, although it sounded a lot less confusing in his head and could tell that the other boy didn't get his point at all.
"What the hell are you talking about?" Ben then asks and was no even more confused by the other boys attempts to explain himself.
"Ben I'm not a doctor, so I really don't know if you're actually depressed, but I'm starting to think that it's a lot simpler than that. "Alex then states, although this time he decides to take it a little more slowly and hopefully not confuse the other boy any further.
"Alex either start making sense or fuck off, because I'm not in the mood for riddles." Ben then states in an irritated tone, he got that the other boy was trying to help him, but so far he had just confused the hell out of him and he already had too much on his mind for any more.
"Ben I think you're just angry and pissed off, like I was saying about you being sad, you deal with that by talking and crying, so the only way you're going to be able to deal with the anger is to well get angry." Alex then states and can tell that this time the other boy was actually thinking about what he had just been told.
"I do get angry though and it doesn't help." Ben responds dismissively, for a moment he thought the other boy was going to actually say something useful and now he just felt even more frustrated.
"You get frustrated and pissed off, I will give you that Ben, but I mean really angry, like actually punching something or someone, hell even throwing things around, when was the last time you did something like that?" Alex then asks and as he looks around, he can still see that they were still be watched and starts to get an idea that might work.
"I pushed you over just now." Ben answers cautiously, he was never a violent person and sure he often shouted and swore when he was upset at someone, but that was about it.
"That's it?" Alex then asks in a surprised tone, he knew that he wasn't a bully or anything, but he was still surprised that the only violent thing he had done recently was pushing him over a few minutes earlier and was now convinced his theory was right.
"Well there was one time when Matt was in hospital and my brother forced me to get angry by slapping me until I started hitting him." Ben then admits after remembering how his brother had provoked him after being told about his boyfriends rape.
"Okay well that is something I guess, so how did you feel afterwards?" Alex then asks and can't help but feel a little relieved that they were not far from his house and could avoid getting the other boy to hit him so that he could feel better, he just needed to get him inside his house before anything happened.
"It really helped I guess, I mean I was still upset and angry, but it definitely helped me feel better." Ben answers honestly and while he knew the situations weren't quite the same, he finally started to see what the boys point was and as he looked around, he wondered if he had any ideas to help him get the anger out of his system, because he really didn't want to hurt anyone and especially outside with other people around and watching them closely.
"We aren't far from my house Ben and if you want we can use my garage." Alex then offers with a friendly smile, his dad had set him up a little gym and it had a punching bag and a few other things that he thought the other boy could use to take his anger out on.
"Your garage?" Ben then asks in a confused tone, he wasn't quite sure what the boy was suggesting and was a little nervous in case he wanted him to beat him up or something.
"Oh right sorry, my dad set the garage up as a sort of mini gym to help with my boxing, I have a punching back and some pads that you can hit and we can even do a little sparring, I have all the safety gear." Alex then explains after realising that the other boy would obviously have no idea what was in his garage and couldn't help giving him a shy smile.
"Won't your parents be mad that you aren't in school?" Ben then asks, although he suddenly realises that he had run away from school himself and knew that he was going to get in trouble.
"They should be out, but even if my dad is home it doesn't matter, he will probably wait until you're gone and then spank me or something." Alex answers honestly and while it was embarrassing to admit he got spanked, he didn't see anything wrong with discipline and it wasn't like his parents did it for fun or enjoyed it, it was just a punishment and he respected that.
"Your dad hits you?" Ben then says in a concerned tone and can't help but think about his boyfriend and didn't like the sound of the boy getting beat, just for trying to help him.
"He doesn't hit me Ben, my parents love me, spanking is just for punishment and I know that they aren't doing it for fun or because they are monsters." Alex quickly states in a slightly defensive tone, he knew his dad would never hurt him and he wanted the other boy to understand that.
"Oh right, sorry it's just that I didn't think parents did that any more and then what David did to Matt, well sorry it's just well you know..." Ben responds before trailing off towards the end, the reminder of what happened to his boyfriend quickly replaced his concern for the boy standing in front of him and he just felt that now familiar feeling of sadness and anger.
"I get it and don't worry about me, so what do you say anyway, want to give it a go and punch the fuck out of a bag full of whatever the hell they put in them?" Alex then says with a small grin, he could tell that the other boys mood had darkened again and wanted to try and get him into his garage to let off some steam as quickly as he could.
"Sure, but I should ring someone first, just so they know that I'm alright." Ben then responds as he looks around again, he was really hoping that the other boy was right about this anger thing and that it would help him get over everything that had been getting him down.
"You should probably phone Wesley, I mean you could phone Carter, but he will probably be feeling guilty about letting you out of his sights and might not listen to what you're actually trying to tell him." Alex then suggests, although he couldn't blame Carter for what happened, even though he did warn him not to let Ben do something stupid, it was easier said than done and Ben would have found a way to run off eventually anyway.
"Okay well lead the way and I will call him as we walk." Ben then states as he gets his phone out and scrolls down to find Wesley's number.
"What do you mean he ran away Wesley?" Mitch asks as he keeps one eye on the back door of the house, he just couldn't believe what he was hearing and had no idea what he was going to do.
"We think he might be depressed Mitch, but it's just a guess and well he was sick in the toilets as well and we think he has been drinking, you know like alcohol, but we have no idea how he would get any of that and well he must of just got scared and ran away." Wesley explains as best he can, although he was feeling too worried himself to really think straight.
"Oh fuck." Mitch then says in an annoyed tone, he knew exactly where the alcohol had come from and knew that he was going to be in some much deserved shit from his dad and Sarah, if his little brother had not only got drunk, but was actually doing it on purpose.
"What?" Wesley asks in a concerned tone, he knew the older boy might be a bit surprised and worried, but he wasn't expecting him to react like this and couldn't help but wonder if he could hear a little guilt in his tone as well.
"Nothing, but you need to tell me something Wesley, I mean why do you think he is depressed?" Mitch then asks, he was just in a complete mess mentally and just couldn't believe that no one had picked up on his little brother being depressed, sure he had been down, but it was understandable after everything, but depressed, well that was something else and a lot more serious and he knew someone should have picked up on it.
"Carter knows more than I do about this Mitch, but we got caught trying to leave the school to find Ben and he is in the headmasters office, but from what he told me, Ben is in a bad way Mitch and well I think he needs to see my dad as soon as possible." Wesley responds and again tries his best to explain, but knows that he isn't doing a great job and just wishes that they had been more careful sneaking out, instead of trying to walk straight out of the front gates like a couple of idiots.
"Okay well I will try to give him a call, but we need to find him fast Wesley and well do you have any idea where he could have gone?" Mitch then asks, he wanted to go look for him himself, but he had the two boys to look after, which then made him think about how he was going to break the news to them and again just couldn't believe how once again, just when things were looking better, it was all going wrong again.
"We haven't got a clue, but when he ran away from Matt on Sunday, he headed to the park, but he might not go there this time if he doesn't want to be found." Wesley responds in a sad tone and he was tempted to get up and make another attempt to go and look for his friend.
"Look I have Matt and Tobias here Wesley, so I can't go look for him and I know I'm going to get some serious shit for this, but that is going to happen anyway, so I need you to go look for him Wesley, can you do that?" Mitch then asks and even as he says the words he knows he is being irrational and irresponsible and asking a lot of the boy, but his little brother needed help and he couldn't think of anything else.
"Okay, I'm going to go now." Wesley says and hangs up before getting to his feet, but no sooner had he started to sneak away from the office, his phones rings again and he stops in surprise as he sees who it is and quickly answers it. "Ben?" He asks in a surprised tone and couldn't help but be confused by what was happening.
"Wesley I'm so sorry for running away" Ben apologises after deciding that it was the least he can do and while he knew he should be telling Carter this, he knew Wesley would pass the apology on.
"Oh shit Ben, look I could lecture you and have a go at you for being such an idiot, but I just want you to tell me where you are and if you're alright." Wesley responds in a sincere tone, he really just wanted to make sure his friend was safe and just put the other stuff to one side until he was back home.
"I'm fine Wesley, well not fine but I'm safe and Alex is with me and he is taking me to his house." Ben then states and while he tried his best to sound okay, he knew that he wasn't exactly convincing and just felt so angry at himself for not even being able to do that right.
"Huh? What are you doing with Alex?" Wesley then asks in a surprised, yet confused tone, Alex was the last person he expected his friend to be with, even after his boyfriend had told him about what happened in the toilet.
"Wesley it's Alex, look I know I'm not anyone's favourite person right now, but I'm with Ben and I will make sure he is safe, I promise." Alex then says after taking the phone off the other boy, he could tell that he was starting to get angry and he wanted to get him to his garage before he did something stupid again.
"Alex? What the hell are you doing with..." Wesley begins to ask, but is quickly interrupted again.
"Look Wesley, I'm sure Carter already told you about what happened in the toilet and well I think I was wrong about the depression and it's..." Alex then begins to explain before being interrupted.
"Alex, just shut up and bring him back to school." Wesley quickly states, despite the fact he was obviously trying to help, he didn't want him anywhere near his friend after what he and his group of friends did to his boyfriend.
"No you listen Wesley, you can beat the crap out of me the next time you see me if you want, but right now Ben is a mess and I think I know how to help him and we are going to go to my house now and find out if I'm right or not." Alex then states in a serious tone, he knew he had to take control of the conversation and would take whatever he got from the other boy when they next saw each other, but for now he was going to help Ben.
"What do you mean find out if you're right or not?" Wesley then asks, he knew there wasn't much he can do from where he was and despite his feelings about Alex, he had to concede that if he could help his friend, then he had to trust that he wasn't playing some sick game and let him do it.
"I know I told Carter I think Ben is depressed, but after speaking with him one on one Wesley, I'm pretty sure he is just angry and needs to vent it before he can move on." Alex then explains as he pulls on Ben's arm to let him know to turn left, instead of walking straight ahead.
"Vent? How is he..." Wesley then begins to ask before being interrupted.
"Come on Wesley, you know what I mean and it's no different from crying when you're feeling sad and my dad turned our garage into a mini gym, so I'm going to give him some gloves and let him take it out on my punching bag and if that doesn't work I have some training pads
"Can I talk to him again please." Wesley then states and despite still not liking him, he had to admit that if this was an anger thing, then his plan was pretty good and had to give him credit, although he wanted to speak with his friend first, just to make sure that he wasn't being forced into anything.
"Hey Wesley." Ben then says after taking the phone of the other boy.
"Is everything he just said true?" Wesley then asks straight away, he knew that even if he was being threatened that his friend wasn't a pushover and would give him some sort of signal to let him know he needed help and wanted to be one hundred percent sure Alex was being genuine.
"Well we won't know until I start punching things Wesley, but it makes sense and I want to try it before worrying everybody." Ben answer honestly, but Wesley can't help but feel a little worried after already phoning Mitch and knew that he needed to phone him back before he told Matt and Tobias what had happened.
"Call me as soon as you find out Ben, but I really need to phone Mitch back and tell him not to say anything to Matt." Wesley then says, without realising what he had just revealed.
"You called Mitch?" Ben quickly asks in a shocked tone, he didn't think his friends would do that to him and could feel his anger building.
"You ran away from school Ben, if we didn't call Mitch then the school would have, or worse, they would have called your dad, but Carter is convincing them that you just went home ill and I will tell them I already called Mitch, but he had to know Ben and you know I'm right." Wesley answers in a firm tone, he knew his friend would feel a little betrayed, but he also knew that he would understand and once he calmed down, he would realise they did the right thing.
"Fine, but you better call him right now and stop him telling Matt anything or you will be sorry." Ben responds in an angry and irritated tone, if his boyfriend found out and had another freak out, he would never forgive his friends or himself.
"I think it would be obvious something is wrong when he comes to school and you aren't here Ben." Wesley then states, while ignoring his friends threat, he knew he was angry right now and didn't mean it.
"Oh shit, I forgot they were coming." Ben then says as he realises just how much he has fucked up by running away from school.
"Look it's too late now, but if you get yourself sorted at Alex's, then you can get home and explain everything to them before they even leave for school, you have like two and a half hours Ben and if you're fine by then, Matt will just be happy that you're okay." Wesley quickly states in a reassuring tone, he knew he could get Mitch to find a way to put the school visit off for a day and avoid Matt worrying too much.
"What if..." Ben then begins to say as he feels Alex pulling on his arm and turns left again, but before he can carry on, his friend starts talking.
"Get sorted and let me sort Mitch out, he wasn't with Matt a few minutes ago and he would put off talking to him for as long as possible to think about the best way to tell him, so I'm hanging up now and just get yourself fixed and punch the fuck out of the bag and pads Ben." Wesley then says before hanging up and Ben can only hope that things somehow work out themselves out, without his boyfriend ending up hurt and upset.
"How much further Alex?" Ben then asks as he turns to the other boy, he was really feeling angry and upset and wanted to punch something quickly.
"Just around the corner." Alex responds with a slightly concerned look, although he was happy to have hopefully helped the other boy sort himself out.
"Okay." Ben then states as he walks beside the other boy towards his house.
"Can I come in please Tobias?" Matt asks as he stands outside his brothers bedroom, he felt a little stupid just standing outside the door, but he didn't dare walk straight in, not after upsetting his him so much.
"Go away." Tobias calls back instantly and Matt can't help but sigh in relief, sure it wasn't an invitation to go in, but at least he was talking to him and wasn't giving him the silent treatment and knew that his brother wasn't really mad at him.
"So you forgive me then?" Matt then asks as he walks into the room and can't help but be a little surprised when he sees his brother naked.
"Hey get out, I'm still mad at you." Tobias then says in a surprised tone, he hadn't expected his brother to walk in without him telling him too and didn't quite know what to do with himself.
"Why are you naked?" Matt can't help but ask as he lets his curiosity get in the way of why he was actually up here in the first place, they had both put on their underwear and shorts before leaving the pool house and didn't quite know why he had stripped naked again.
"I was going to put some crappy clothes on." Tobias answers, although he was actually just going to put some clean underwear on and spend the rest of the day in his bed, but he didn't want to tell his brother that.
"You really want to go to school in crappy clothes?" Matt then asks and smiles when he sees the confused look on his brothers face.
"No make fun of me, me not go without you and you too scared go." Tobias responds in an irritated tone and can't help but be even more annoyed after talking like a complete idiot again and knows that he is just getting more worked up and frustrated.
"Well yeah I'm scared, but can you blame me Tobias." Matt then says, but decides to keep going instead of waiting for his brother to say something. "I know everyone is getting tired of it, but I'm sorry and I wish I wasn't like I am, but it's not my fault Tobias and I try my best to not ruin everything but... but..." He then starts to say, but can't help but trail off as he feels tears rolling down his face.
"Me sorry, you know I'm not really mad at you." Tobias then quickly says as he walks over and cuddles his brother, while at the same time forgetting about his own issues and remembering that he had it easy compared to him and shouldn't be so selfish.
"I really try though Tobias, I just don't want you all to hate me for being like this." Matt then manages to say, he was starting to lose control, but feeling his brother cuddling him, had calmed him down enough not to freak out, although he couldn't quite stop himself from being scared and upset.
"We can go to the school another day, I wanted to go today, but there are plenty of other days, so we can tell Mitch to phone Ben and let him know that we aren't going." Tobias decides to say after using his elastic band, he still wanted to go and he couldn't help feeling a little annoyed, but his brother was more important to him then meeting some girls and knew that if something happened to him, then he wouldn't be able to forgive himself.
"We still have the whole weekend with Carter and Wesley to look forward too and the strip poker and dares, it's going to be so much fun." Matt then says and can see that his brother was excited about the weekend, but he couldn't help but feel guilty about today. "But if you want to go today, then so do I because well er... let's just go, Mitch will be there and he won't let us out of his sight." He then says after deciding to stick to his original plan and again can't help but see how excited his brother is.
"No, let's go another day instead, I want to just spend the day with you without the others." Tobias then says and surprises himself with the fact that he really did want stay with his brother, although he could tell that his brother was confused.
"But you wanted to go and I really don't mind Tobias, I need to stop being scared and..." Matt then begins to say before being cut off by his brother.
"Matt I want to be with you and well I missed when we used to just be together, you know just the two of us." Tobias states in a sincere tone and he genuinely did miss when they would spend the day together and just enjoy each others company.
"Okay, but get dressed and then we can go and tell Mitch." Matt then tells his brother and waits for him to start putting some clothes on.
"You're going to stay?" Tobias then asks, sure they were brothers now and they had seen each other naked quite a lot in the last week, but he didn't want him to watch him getting dressed.
"You want me to wait outside?" Matt asks in a surprised tone, they had seen each other naked and with boners and his brother had just cuddled him naked, so he didn't see why watching him put some clothes on would embarrass him.
"Just because we are brothers now and have seen each other naked, doesn't mean you're allowed to see me naked whenever you want Matt, I don't mind when we go swimming and stuff like that, but I want some privacy too." Tobias decides to explain after using his elastic band again, he had been talking a lot better in the last day or two, but he didn't want to risk saying the wrong thing and upsetting his brother.
"Oh well yeah, shit sorry Tobias I just didn't really think about it like that and okay, I will head downstairs and get us some OJ okay." Matt quickly responds in a slightly embarrassed tone, he couldn't believe he hadn't even considered the fact his brother would obviously want some privacy and not to be watched all the time, especially when he was naked and felt guilty for not thinking about that himself.
"It's okay, I'm not being shy or anything, but well you understand right?" Tobias then asks, although he struggled to put into words how he felt and really hoped his brother understood what he was trying to say.
"Yeah and I agree, I guess we all need to learn how to live together and what is okay and what isn't, now hurry up and get dressed and I will see you downstairs." Matt responds with a smile, before limping over to the door.
"Thanks Matt." Tobias then says as he watches his brother limp out of his room and close the door behind himself and decides to sit down for a few moments before deciding what to wear.
"I can't believe they aren't going to call our parents." Carter says in a surprised tone, as he and his boyfriend head towards their next class and was sure after his own time in there, that they would be calling their parents about trying to leave the school without permission.
"Well they still might, but either way we did the right thing and at least Ben is okay." Wesley responds as they turn down the corridor and although they had missed too much of the class to go in, their headmaster wanted them to apologise to their teacher and explain what happened and while they felt a little embarrassed about doing it, it was a small price to pay and at least they weren't getting detention.
"Yeah, but I can't believe he is just angry though and only needs to get it out of his system" Carter then says as they reach their classroom and stand outside, he had been sold on the depression idea that Alex had come up with, but after being told about the anger thing, it did make sense and hoped that it was just that and not something more serious.
"Well until he calls us, don't get your hopes up Carter, it could still be something more serious." Wesley responds in a cautious tone, he wanted to believe everything would be alright, but after everything that has happened, he was finding it harder to think positively about everything and was grateful when he feels his boyfriend taking his hand into his own.
"I know, but you better phone Mitch up now, it might not be too late to get to him before he tells Matt." Carter then suggests, he felt really bad that his boyfriend hadn't had a chance to call him and felt even worse when he wasn't able to make the call himself when the deputy head had insisted on talking with him until his boyfriend had come out of the headmasters room.
"Oh right yeah, good idea Sweetpea." Wesley responds with a smile and despite what was going on, he needed to have a few moments of distraction before he had to get serious and couldn't help but chuckle at the look on his boyfriends face and knew he could rule that pet name off the list.
"Really, you're still doing the stupid pet name thing? You're never going to find one I like Wesley." Carter then states in a less than impressed tone, although inside he really liked the fact his boyfriend was still making the effort to find one and although he knew he would never succeed, it was still a fun little game.
"We will see, now shut up so I can talk to Mitch." Wesley responds with a grin as he dials the older boys number, but instantly his mood drops a little and knows that he could be too late already.
"Right now that you're both here, I need to talk to you about something." Mitch says as he watches his brother walk into the room, he had been trying to think of a way to tell them about his little brother and couldn't think of any way to really sugar coat it and now that both boys were here, he just decided it would be best to come out and say it.
"Wait we have something to say Mitch and it's really important." Matt then says, he had been sitting nervously waiting for his brother to hurry up, so that they could tell the older boy about their decision to not go to the school and didn't want to wait any longer.
"Okay well you can go first then." Mitch responds in a slightly relieved tone, although he knew that he shouldn't be letting the boys distract him from telling them about what happened, but he hoped it would give him a little more time to think what to say and how to word it.
"We had a big talk Mitch and well Tobias and me aren't going to the school today, we want to just spend the day together like we used to do back home and well we just wanted you to know." Matt says as he looks at the older boy curiously, he could tell that there was something bothering him, but he had no idea what it could be and figured maybe it was just his imagination.
"Really?" Mitch asks in a surprised tone as he turns to his brother, thinking that maybe Matt had guilt him into not going to the school.
"Yeah, I mean I really want to go to school, but he isn't ready Mitch and there will be plenty of chances to go there, but if we went today and something happened than it just wouldn't be worth it." Tobias decides to answer honestly, after seeing no point in lying or trying to make up some other reason.
"Well I can understand that and I'm really proud of you both for thinking it through and you're right Tobias, there will be plenty of chances for you to visit the school." Mitch responds with a sincere smile, he was impressed with the boys, although as he sees them both smiling, he realises that he still has to tell them about his little brother and knows it will upset them.
"We are going to have fun together, but can you call the others to let them know please Mitch." Matt then asks, he wanted to do it himself, but he didn't know if he could explain it and make them understand without getting upset and he really didn't want to get upset again.
"Oh well..." Mitch begins to respond, but trails off quickly when he realises that he has to tell them what has happened and that there was no way he could get out of it.
"Oh please Mitch, I don't want to explain why we aren't going and getting upset, Tobias is staying home because of me and I want to have fun and make it up to him, but I can't do that if I'm all upset." Matt then quickly states in a pleading tone, he really hoped the older boy would do it for him and not make him do it.
"Why don't you both sit down and Matt you come sit next to me and we can have a little talk." Mitch then tells the boys, deciding that if he made him sit next to him, he could at least comfort him and maybe stop him hurting himself or Tobias if he freaked out.
"What wrong Mitch?" Tobias asks nervously, he could tell by his big brothers expression that he was going to tell them something bad and as he watched his brother sit down next to him, he couldn't help but think it was really bad.
"Are you mad at me?" Matt then asks nervously, he just couldn't think of any other reason that the older boy was making him sit next to him to tell them both something and by the look on his face, he knew that whatever he was going to say wasn't good.
"I don't know much, but Wesley phoned me a little while ago and he..." Mitch begins to say, but the sound of his phone ringing causes him to stop and feel a little relieved, he really wasn't looking forward to this conversation at all, although when he sees who is ringing his heart sinks a little and can't help but think something else has gone wrong. "Wesley did you find him?" He asks as soon as he answers the phone.
"Well not exactly..." Wesley begins to answer, but he is quickly interrupted by the older boy.
"What do you mean not exactly?" Mitch asks in an impatient tone, although he realises straight away that if he had just shut up, the boy would have told him by now.
"Look he phoned me and right now he is at a friends house." Wesley then states, he felt a little annoyed at being interrupted but he could understand the older boy being worried about his brother and would be the same way if it was his boyfriend who had ran away.
"He is alright though isn't he, I mean he isn't hurt or anything?" Mitch then asks, he was feeling a little better about his little brother not being alone, but he was still worried about him.
"Who isn't hurt Mitch?" Matt then asks, he had been sitting silently as the older boy talked, but he was confused and could tell his brother was as well.
"Matt, just give me a moment please." Mitch answers in a distracted tone, he couldn't deal with the other boys right now and just needed to make sure his little brother was alright.
"Oh shit, Matt is with you?" Wesley then asks, he wasn't expecting him to be with the older boy and wondered if he was too late and Mitch had already told him about Ben.
"Not important Wesley, just tell me that he isn't hurt." Mitch responds as he turns his attention back to his little brother again.
"No he is fine, well not fine but he isn't hurt and we think that we were wrong about the depression thing now Mitch." Wesley answers, before deciding to explain about what Alex thinks is wrong with Ben, while hoping that Matt hadn't been told about the other thing yet.
"Look Wesley I have Matt and Tobias with me, so you need to just tell me what is going on right now." Mitch then states in a firm tone, he knew that he was being ungrateful and harsh, but he didn't have time for riddles right now and just wanted to know what was happening.
"Alex thinks that Ben is just angry and needs to find a way to get it out of his system, you know like if you're sad and upset then you cry, so Alex has taken him to his house and is going to let Ben use his punching bag and stuff to see if it helps and I told Ben to call me after he is done to let me know if it worked." Wesley responds and explains it as clearly as he could, he got the message that the older boy didn't have time to hear every little detail and just tried his best.
"Okay well er... shit look it does make sense and Ben has never been good at dealing with his feelings, but I need you to call me as soon as he calls you Wesley okay." Mitch responds as he takes in what the boy had just told him and while it wasn't a certainty, it was a lot better than the alternative and could only hope that for once everything will turn out okay.
"I will I promise, but what are you going to tell Matt?" Wesley then asks in a concerned tone, after remembering that his friend must be hearing the older boys side of the conversation and just wished he could be there to comfort him if he took it badly.
"Everything you have told me, he is going to find out anyway and Tobias is here to help me out." Mitch answers honestly, although when he hears someone cough a little and realises that the two boys are still right next to him, he can't help but feel like a complete idiot. "Look I have to go Wesley, just well you know." Mitch then says and hangs up before the boy has a chance to respond, before turning to see the boys staring straight at him.
"Mitch what's going on?" Matt asks as soon as the older boy puts his phone away and Mitch can't help but feel like he is stuck between a rock and a hard place.
"Ben ran away from school Matt, I'm still not completely sure what happened but..." Mitch then begins to explain but he is quickly interrupted.
"He did what?" Matt asks in a shocked tone and tries to stand up, but is surprised when he feels himself being held in place by the older boy and just looks at in in confusion.
"Matt just listen, he ran away, but Wesley just told me that he is with some kid called Alex and he..." Mitch then tries to say, but despite telling the boy to listen he is interrupted again.
"Alex? What the hell is he doing with him?" Matt then states in an angry tone, he couldn't see why his boyfriend would go off with him of all people, especially after what he did to Carter and could feel himself starting to tremble a little.
"Matt calm down and let me talk." Mitch then states in a firm and serious tone, he couldn't blame the boy for acting like this, but he felt him trembling and knew he had to be strong.
"Matt please just let him talk." Tobias then says as he gets up and cuddles his brother from behind, he could see what was happening and while he had no idea what was happening with their brother, he got the sense that it was under control and knew that he needed to help keep his brother calm.
"Matt like I said, I'm not completely sure what is going on, but it is linked to how Ben has been this week and this Alex kid, whoever he is, thinks that Ben is angry and I mean really angry and hasn't been able to vent that anger." Mitch then starts to explain and can see that he is about to be interrupted, so decides to quickly explain what he means. "It's similar to when you're really upset Matt and to deal with that you cry and it helps a little, so when you're really angry and you bottle it up, you need to find a way to release that, do you understand what I mean?" He then explains before pausing, just to make sure the boy understands what he is saying.
"I think so, but what is he angry about?" Matt asks in response, he understood the comparison and he also knew that his boyfriend was terrible when it came to bottling up his feelings, but he didn't understand what he was so angry about, that it would cause him to behave like he has.
"I don't really know Matt, I mean as a guess I would say it has to do with everything that has happened to you and how he wasn't able to protect you." Mitch responds with his best guess, although he knew that the only person who knew the actually answer was Ben himself.
"We have talked about that though and he knows that there was nothing he could do." Matt then states, he appreciated the older boy attempting to give him an answer, but he knew that it had to be more than that.
"Maybe he is angry because he can't hurt that teacher or your dad Matt." Tobias then says, although when his brothers both turn to him and give him a curious look, he feels a little self conscious about joining the conversation.
"What do you mean hurt them?" Matt asks in a curious tone, just before Mitch could ask the same question.
"Well er... well I want to hurt them and make them hurt like they made you hurt, so maybe Ben feels the same." Tobias then tries to explain as best he can, but even after using his elastic band he was too nervous to speak properly and just hoped his brother understood him.
"Well it could be that I guess Tobias." Mitch then states in a slightly dismissive tone and Tobias can't help but feel a little hurt that his big brother doesn't think his idea was good.
"Sorry me stupid." Tobias then states as he slumps back down into his chair, he couldn't believe his big brother talked to him like that.
"Actually Tobias, I think you might be right." Matt then says as he takes his brothers hands into his own and gives him an encouraging smile, he wasn't completely sure, but his brothers words had made him think and it did make sense.
"You do?" Mitch then asks, not realising how much he is hurting his brother by first dismissing his theory and then being surprised that Matt thought it was right.
"Well it's not just that Mitch, but when you think about him wishing I was dead and how that made him feel and then the singing thing, plus everything else, it could be true." Matt explains, before turning back to his brother. "You're the best Tobias and ignore Mitch, he is too worried about Ben to know what he is saying." He then states in a sincere tone and can see that his words had reassured his brother.
"What did I do?" Mitch then asks in a confused tone, he had no idea that he had upset his brother and wondered how he did it.
"No worry Mitch, let just worry about Ben, me fine I promise." Tobias responds with a smile, he was still a little annoyed, but his brother was right and he knew he shouldn't be so hard on his big brother.
"So er... how do we help Ben get better Mitch?" Matt then asks as he looks at the older boy for answers.
"Well if this punching bag thing works at that Alex's place, then we can buy Ben one and maybe some other things that will let him get any anger or frustration out of his system." Mitch suggests as he tries to think of ways that could help his brother.
"He not be mean and bad boy now though right?" Tobias then asks in a concerned tone, he understood that his brother was struggling with his angry feelings, but he didn't like the idea of him hitting things to feel better.
"No Tobias, Ben would never be like that, he just needs something to er... Mitch?" Matt begins to explain, but he just couldn't think of the words to explain what he wanted to say and hoped the older boy would do a better job.
"Matt is right Tobias, he really isn't like that and he just needs to find a way to deal with the anger and hate he has for Mr Jones and David, without bottling it up and letting it affect him like it has been doing this week." Mitch then states in a confident tone, he probably could have worded that a lot better, but he could tell that for now at least, it had reassured his brother and felt himself relax a little at how the conversation had turned out, he knew that it could have been a lot worse than it was.
"Okay I think I understand, me might want to hit the punching bag too and pretend it is David and Mr Jones." Tobias then responds with a little grin and even though he was only being half serious, he actually thought that it was a good idea and while it wasn't the same as really hurting them, it was a close as he could ever come to doing it.
"I know he isn't fine Mitch, but he isn't like really hurt or anything is he?" Matt then asks, although he knew that if he was, Mitch wouldn't be sitting here with them still, but he just needed to hear it before he could relax and try to have a bit of fun with his brother, instead of worrying about his boyfriend until he called them.
"Wesley said he was fine Matt and he is safe." Mitch answers with a small smile, he was more than happy to reassure the boy and could tell that he was going to try and not let it ruin his day.
"I need to go to the toilet, but come get me if he calls please Mitch." Matt then states, he had wanted to go for almost five minutes and now that he was satisfied that his boyfriend was okay for now, he wanted to go and then try and enjoy some time alone with his brother.
"Okay Matt." Mitch responds with a worried look as he watches the boy stand up.
"Mitch I'm fine, I just really need to go and I won't be long." Matt then states in a reassuring tone after seeing the way the older boy was looking at him.
"Me go with you?" Tobias then asks, he could tell that his brother actually needed to go to the toilet, but at the same time he wasn't sure if he was alright after what they had just been told about Ben.
"I don't really want you watching me take a shit Tobias." Matt responds with a grin, before turning a little more serious. "Look seriously I'm okay, well unless Ben calls and the punching bag thing didn't work, but until then I'm not going to let it get to me, so well yeah, I'm fine for now, I promise." He then states and decides to start making his way to the pool house, instead of waiting for either of them to say anything.
"How are you feeling now Ben?" Alex asks as he watches him take a little breather.
"Fuck off." Ben responds before resuming his beating of the punching bag and while it was hardly the response he was expecting, Alex could tell that his idea was working after seeing the little smirk on the other boys face.
"You should try moving around the bag, it will really get your heart going if you move and punch." Alex then suggests and despite getting half a glare for his troubles, he just smiles as the other boy starts to circle the bag as he punches it. "So which one are you kicking the shit out of at the moment?" He then asks, he wasn't one hundred percent sure, but he was sure the other boy was talking as he was punching the bag and he thought he heard him say David a few times.
"What?" Ben asks in a confused tone as he stops moving and looks up at the other boy, who despite everything that had happened with Carter, he was starting to view as a friend and couldn't help thinking that he was a lot like Wesley in his bluntness.
"I keep hearing you saying something, but I can't quite make it out, except a few times when you said David, so I figured you were imagining the bag was either him or Mr Jones." Alex explains as he walks over to the side of the garage to get his focus pads.
"What are you doing?" Ben then asks in a curious tone as the other boy walks over to him with some pads on his hands.
"These are focus pads, I want you to hit them for a while." Alex explains with a smile, he had been nervous earlier about doing this, but after seeing the other boy with the punching bag, he knew that he wasn't going crazy and was actually throwing some good punches and was now curious to see what he could do.
"Can't I just hit the bag?" Ben then asks in a confused tone, he was enjoying hitting the bag and was a little nervous about hitting the other boy, even if he was wearing pads on his hands.
"You can do whatever you want, I just think you should mix it up a little and after we do this you can try the speedball and then go back to the punching bag." Alex responds and straight away sees the confused look on the other boys face and knows exactly what he is going to ask.
"What the hell is a speedball?" Ben asks as he looks at the other boy curiously and can't help but wonder if he was up to something.
"Come on you have seen the Rocky films, it's what boxers use to train their hand speed and coordination, I will show you after we do a bit with the focus pads." Alex explains as he moves closer to the other boy and holds his hands out.
"Oh right, okay well what do I do now?" Ben then asks as he looks at the other boys hands and wonders if he was meant to hit as hard as he could or if it was meant to be about accuracy.
"It's up to you, but I think you should start of slow and get a feel for hitting the pads, then after that we can do a few sequences and go from there." Alex suggests with a smile and was happy to see that things were going well and gives the other boy a light swat on the head with one of the pads to get him going.
"Hey you prick." Ben then states with a grin, he had to admit he was feeling better than he had for a long time and again couldn't help finding himself liking Alex more and more, before being swatted on the head again.
"You going to start punching or stand there looking like a moron?" Alex then asks in a teasing tone and quickly grins when the other boy gives the pads a few gentle hits.
"Such a prick." Ben then says with another grin and decides to get started for real and begins to punch the pads. "Hey, stop moving your hands." He then states in a slightly irritated tone, he was enjoying hitting them, but when the other boy started to move his hands it threw him off a little.
"You seriously thought that I was just going to let you hit them by keeping still?" Alex teases as he gives the other boy a few swats on the head.
"No, but seriously Alex, this is just annoying." Ben responds honestly and can see the disappointed look on the other boys face straight away. "Look I appreciate everything you're doing Alex and some other time I would probably enjoy doing the pads, but I just need to hit something and pretend that I'm kicking the shit out of David and Mr Jones." He then adds honestly, he would love to do this again and with Alex, but right now he needed to just let loose and hit something.
"Do what ever you need to do mate." Alex responds with a smile as he lowers his hands and starts to take the pads off.
"Mate?" Ben then asks curiously and again found himself actually liking the other boy and definitely wanted to talk with Carter and Wesley about him later on.
"Oh er... look I know we aren't going to be be friends, not after what..." Alex begins to responds before being cut off.
"I have no idea how Carter or Wesley really feel about you, although Carter never holds a grudge, Wesley on the other hand isn't going to forgive you for hurting Carter and I'm not exactly forgiving you either, but we are good Alex and well if you wanted to be friends with me, well just keep being yourself and not a bullying prick and you never know." Ben states honestly, although he went a little off track towards the end, he could tell that the other boy took his words seriously.
"I don't like being a prick." Alex then half mumbles and quickly turns away from the other boy and puts the pads back on the shelf, although he was really just trying to hide how much the other boys words hurt him, he really didn't like being thought of as a bullying prick, despite knowing that it was true.
"I don't like being an emotional wreck Alex, but thanks to you I might be able to pull myself together and well thank you." Ben then says before walking back over to the punching bag and begins to jab at it, he may have his own issues but he saw the hurt look in the other boys eyes before he turned around and felt like he had to say something to at least let him know that he appreciated what he had potentially done for him.
"Thank you Ben, but remember to circle the bag and use your knees and feet instead of just your fists." Alex then suggests as he turns back to watch the other boy, who he hopes despite his earlier doubts, might be willing to be his friend.
"Okay." Ben replies before doing as he is told and was surprised by how good it felt and he couldn't help grinning a little as he imagined kneeing David and Mr Jones in their balls.
"So are you really okay with not going to the school today Tobias?" Mitch decides to ask his brother, they had been sitting in silence since Matt had left them alone and he was curious to know what he really felt about it.
"I really wanted to go Mitch, but he isn't ready and I don't mind waiting a little longer." Tobias responds honestly as he gives his big brother a small smile.
"You know you don't have to put him first Tobias, you deserve to be happy as well." Mitch then states, he could tell that his brother was being honest, but he was a little worried about him still.
"But that is the reason I'm here." Tobias responds as he gives his big brother a curious look and wonders why he is talking to him about this.
"What?" Mitch then asks in response, he was worried before, but now he was confused as well by his answer.
"It why I got out scary place, to help Matt get better." Tobias answers and still isn't quite sure why his big brother seems so confused about what he is saying.
"You think your mum only got you out of the orphanage was to help Matt?" Mitch then asks as he finally catches on to what his brother is saying and can't believe he actually thinks that is the reason they got him out of the orphanage.
"Yeah to help Matt, it okay though because me happy not be in scary place any more." Tobias responds honestly, sure they had all said they love him and were happy to find him, but he knew he only got out because they needed someone to help Matt and he was happy with that.
"No Tobias, Sarah tried to find you as soon as she found out what happened to your family and that was before David did what he did to Matt." Mitch quickly states, although he would have liked to explain it a lot more in depth than that, he wanted to quickly reassure his brother that he wasn't just here because of Matt.
"She did?" Tobias then asks in a surprised tone, he was more than happy with how things were and why he thought he was here, but if his big brother was telling the truth then it would make it a billion times better and he could already feel himself smiling.
"Look Tobias, I'm not going to lie to you and say that you being here isn't helping Matt, because it is and we all know how he feels about you, but Sarah loves you like a real son Tobias, so even if nothing happened to Matt, she would have still found you and she would have still adopted you, do you understand what I'm saying Tobias?" Mitch then asks after explaining to his brother that he is here because they love him.
"So me here because you all want me here and not just help make Matt better?" Tobias asks with a big smile and despite what is happening with his other brother, he just felt happy and loved.
"Come here." Mitch then states as he holds his arms open and smiles when his brother does as he is told and walks into his arms. "We all love you and you're a part of our family now and even though we all want Matt to get better, you need to make sure you do things for yourself as well Tobias, because it is alright to be a little selfish sometimes and Matt would tell you the same thing." He then adds in a sincere tone as he cuddles his brother tightly.
"What would I tell him?" Matt asks as he limps back over to the table, he had only caught the last few words and the way his brother was being cuddled by the older boy, made him feel a little worried that he was upset or something.
"That it is alright for him to be a little selfish sometimes." Mitch responds as he turns to face the younger boy with a warm smile.
"Is this something to do with me?" Matt then asks in a slightly irritated tone as he sits down across from his brother and the older boy, who slowly part to look at him.
"Me thought I only got out of scary place because they want me to help you." Tobias decides to say, he could tell his brother wasn't happy about being talked about and decided that it would be better to just be honest.
"No way Tobias, Mum would have found you even if I was fine." Matt then quickly says, although he is slightly distracted when he sees Mitch giving him a slight grin.
"Mitch said the same thing Matt, but I wouldn't care if it was because of that, I'm just happy to be with you again." Tobias then states sincerely and quickly smiles when he sees his brother smile at him.
"Me too Tobias, I missed you so much, but anyway this selfish thing, is it to do with not going to the school today?" Matt then asks, he still felt bad for ruining their plans, but he was genuinely looking forward to just spending the day with his brother and although his boyfriend ran away from school, he was determined to not let it affect his day too much.
"Sort of I guess, but I want to just spend the day with you more, well if you still want to." Tobias responds as he gives his brother a curious look, he wasn't sure what was going on in his head and wondered if he was ignoring what was happening with Ben or if he really wasn't worried about it.
"Why wouldn't I want to?" Matt then asks in a surprised tone, he couldn't see how his brother got the impression that he didn't want to spend the day together and wondered if he was giving of some weird vibe or something.
"Because of Ben." Tobias responds and still isn't sure how his brother is really feeling about what had happened and gives his big brother a worried glance.
"Oh right, well yeah I'm worried, well actually I'm really worried and if no one knew where he was or why he ran away, I would make Mitch take us to go look for him, but well for now he is safe and hopefully he is dealing with the anger thing, so I'm going to trust him and believe in him and not get too upset or freak out." Matt then states in a serious but calm tone, he was still worried and was only just able to stop himself calling his boyfriend, but he knew that for now his boyfriend needed to do whatever it was that he was doing and him hassling him would only stop him from doing that.
"I'm so proud of you Matt." Mitch then states in a sincere tone, he was impressed with the boys maturity and while he had no doubt that he was probably struggling inside, it was good to see that he was able to not let it freak him out and it was another positive sign that he was getting better.
"Me too Matt, you aren't freaking out or anything and well let's just play in the pool naked." Tobias then states with a grin and before either of his brothers can respond, he quickly strips off and runs over to the pool before jumping in.
"He is just insane." Matt then states as he shakes his head smiling, he was actually starting to get a little down after talking about his boyfriend, but his brother just wiped all that away and he started to remove his own clothes.
"He is a breath of fresh air and skinny dipping does sound fun." Mitch then states with a smile as he starts to remove his own clothes and can't help but chuckle as the younger boy looks at him in surprise. "If it's good enough for you two perverts, than it's good enough for me." He then states before checking his phone.
"Is your phone on loud?" Matt then asks in a concerned tone, he had just thought about his boyfriend again and knew that if they were in the pool, then they might miss him trying to call one of them.
"Oh crap, good point Matt." Mitch responds as he reaches over to his phone and turns the volume up. "Why don't you jump in Matt and I will pull a chair closer to the side and leave my phone on it." He then suggests with a smile, before glancing over to his brother to see him happily swimming lengths and can't help but shake his head when he sees his bare arse peaking through the surface.
"Will we be able to hear them?" Matt then asks as he hands his phone over to the older boy, he didn't want to risk someone calling his phone and not being able to hear it.
"I know you're worried Matt, but just get in the water and have some fun, I will keep an eye on the phones and I'm sure a wrecking ball will get our attention." Mitch responds with a big grin before placing both phones on the chair and diving into the water.
"I'm going to kill you Ben." Matt then mutters to himself with a grin, he couldn't wait until he could change his ringtone and for the teasing and odd looks to stop whenever his phone rang.
"You can kill him later, now get your cute little bum in the water Matt." Mitch then calls out and couldn't help grinning at the boys expression and knew that he didn't think anyone would hear what he had said.
"Okay." Matt responds as he turns bright red, he couldn't believe he heard him and decides to quickly dive in before he notices how embarrassed he is as well.
"Nice dive." Mitch says as soon as the younger boy surfaces and can't help but smile as he grins at the praise, before lowering himself in the water.
"Thanks, but I kind of hurt my foot a little when I pushed myself of the bottom." Matt responds honestly, it wasn't that bad but he wanted to let him know so that he wouldn't try to mess about and throw him around.
"If it gets too painful, just let me know and I will lift you on to the side." Mitch states with a loving smile, he knew that the younger boy wouldn't appreciate being hassled and decided to just keep an eye on him instead.
"Matt come play." Tobias then calls out from the other side of the pool, he was happy to see both his brothers in the pool, but hoped his big brother would let them do their own thing, while he did his for a while.
"You heard him Matt, just warn him about your foot and I will stay over here and float around for a bit." Mitch tell the younger boy, he knew they wanted to spend some time together and he was more than happy to be on his own and float around for a while, well not happy as he had to think about his little brother and also their dad, who he knew would need to know about the alcohol and the running away from school.
"Love you Mitch." Matt then says before making his way over to his brother.
"Love you too Matt." Mitch responds with a smile as he watches him swim away and couldn't help but notice that he was moving a little faster than he had done before and was happy that he was getting better, even if it was very slowly.
"Peter looked pretty disappointed." Carter states as he and his boyfriend watch their friend disappear into the school, they had told him that the others weren't coming to visit today and while he understood, it was clear their friend was disappointed.
"Yeah and did you notice the look in his eyes when we told him about Peter and Ben?" Wesley then asks as he pulls his boyfriend against his chest and smiles when he feels him snuggling up to him.
"He was probably just worried about Ben." Carter responds, although he wasn't sure what the look really was, if he wasn't so convinced their friend was straight, he would swear there was a little jealously in his eyes.
"I don't know, I mean he likes girls, that's obvious but maybe he likes Alex too." Wesley then suggests as he looks around to see some of the other kids giving them glances and while one or two look a little unimpressed, most just seemed to just be curious and a little amused by how they were sitting, although across the playground he does notice a teacher giving them a dirty look and while he wasn't a hundred percent sure, he thought it looked like Mrs Johnson, but a couple of the female teachers looked similar and she was too far away to see properly.
"Well he could be bisexual, but he isn't in any rush to decide what he is and I think it's kind of cool." Carter responds in a contented tone, he just felt so safe in his boyfriends arms and the fact they were in the middle of the school playground, just made it even better and even the few kids seem to be half glaring at them couldn't ruin it for him.
"I remember how I felt when I first realised I liked you Carter, it was just so exciting but at the same time terrifying." Wesley then says as he starts to rubs his boyfriends thigh.
"Terrifying?" Carter can't help but ask in a curious tone, although his boyfriends hand rubbing his thigh was causing him to get a little too excited and despite enjoying the feeling, he reaches down and holds his boyfriends hand against his thigh.
"What's wrong?" Wesley then asks in a concerned tone, usually his boyfriend loved when he rubbed his thigh and couldn't help wondering what was wrong.
"I don't want a boner in the middle of the playground Wesley." Carter responds before letting out a little giggle when he feels his boyfriend trying to remove his hand. "Leave it there you moron and answer my question." He then states as he holds his boyfriends hand in place, he may not want a boner, but he still liked his boyfriends hand on his thigh.
"Well yeah, I mean I always liked girls and even though I was curious about boys, well you know because Jim was gay, I never really thought I would actually be gay until I started noticing you and I didn't even realise I was noticing you until that weekend I became friends with Ben and Matt." Wesley states honestly, he really did consider if he would be gay and would have been happy to be gay, but up until that weekend he was sure he was completely straight.
"Yeah I remember how weird you were around me, I mean I would see you joking around with them and literally as soon as you saw me you got all shy and tongue tied." Carter then says as he gently strokes his boyfriends hand.
"That's when I knew that I really liked you, I mean I have had girlfriends, who I thought at the time were hot and stuff, but I was never shy around them or anyone really, but you, well you just made my heart go crazy and my brain go into some sort of shutdown." Wesley then says with a smile, he didn't realise it at the time, but looking back on it now, he knew that he loved his boyfriend even back then.
"I had no idea it was because you liked me though, I mean you were my fantasy boy Wesley and there was no way someone like you could like someone like me, so I just thought, well I have no idea what I thought really, it was just funny to see you like that and well yeah." Carter the states with a little giggle, which quickly turns into a little yelp of surprise as he feels himself being pulled up and twisted around.
"I love you Carter Morton." Wesley then says in a loving tone, before pulling his boyfriend closer and kissing him, not caring what anyone else thought and despite thinking he heard someone mutter something about them as they walked past, he didn't break the kiss.
"Maybe you should have taken your school stuff off first." Alex states in an amused tone as he looks at the other boy and can see that he is soaked with his own sweat.
"Well I wasn't exactly thinking straight was I." Ben responds with a grin, he was absolutely shattered now and just wanted to rest, but his school uniform was drenched and he was starting to get a little bit uncomfortable.
"True, but what about now?" Alex then asks as he walks over to the other boy and starts to take his gloves off.
"Tired and sweaty." Ben responds honestly as he watches the other boy undo the gloves and can't help but wonder if it was possible to take them off without help.
"Well yeah you idiot, but I meant..." Alex begins to state before being cut off.
"I know what you meant and well I feel good, I mean I'm not going to run around shooting rainbows out of my arse and screaming about how happy I am, but I feel good and can actually think without those stupid confusing feelings distracting me." Ben states with a grin and again can't help but look at the other boy and see a friend.
"I'm glad it worked then and well you know you're always welcome to come here and beat the crap out of my stuff anytime you want." Alex then offers, although he had tried to stop himself getting his hopes up, he wanted to test the waters and see how the other boy reacted to his offer to come around again, without making it seem to obvious and desperate.
"You're a good friend Alex and I can see why Peter has been trying so hard to get us all to see that you aren't just the arrogant bullying prick we thought you were." Ben then responds with a smile, although he quickly realises that he was a little too honest and can see the hurt on the other boys face.
"Well thanks for that." Alex responds and tries his best to not let the fact they all think he is an arrogant bullying prick hurts.
"Sorry that was a stupid thing to say, but come on Alex, after what you did to Carter and let's be honest you have done other things as well, can you really blame people for thinking that?" Ben then asks and while he felt bad for what he had said, he wanted the other boy to at least accept that he hasn't been the best person in the world.
"I guess not, but I'm trying to change, well not change because I am who I am Ben, but I don't like bullying people and I just want Peter to like me and maybe have some friends that aren't complete pricks like me." Alex then decides to respond honestly, he didn't want to spend the next few years with no friends and definitely didn't want anything to do with Jarred again and while some of his boxing teammates were okay, he didn't really like them that much.
"Well for what it is worth, you and me are friends now, but you still have a long way to go with Carter and Wesley before they will want you to hang around with you." Ben then says with a small smile, before adjusting his top, now that he had cooled off his clothes were really starting to bother him and he knew he would have to wait until he got home to change and wash.
"Thanks Ben, look you kind of stink a little so why don't you strip off and you can use our shower, while I find you some old clothes you can borrow." Alex then suggests as he walks over to the garage door, before turning back to his new friend with a smile.
"What strip off now?" Ben then asks nervously, he didn't want to get naked in front of his new friend and definitely didn't want to do it in his friends garage and then walk through his house naked.
"Oh wow, never had you done for being shy Ben." Alex responds in a surprised tone and although he was only joking about his friend getting naked now, he was still surprised by his shyness.
"It's not that, it's just I don't want to walk through your house naked and to be honest I'm just not comfortable enough to be naked around you Alex, I know I said we are friends now, but we don't really know each other yet." Ben then states honestly, he knew he had nothing to be shy about with his body, but that didn't mean he wanted to get naked in front of people all the time.
"Look I was just kidding about stripping off, I mean if you said yes and went for it I would have just laughed at you or something, but I'm serious about the shower Ben, so come with me and I will show you were it is." Alex states with a smile, he knew that Ben was one of the main people in the group of friends and having him on side could only be a good thing.
"I should call Wesley first." Ben then says as he walks over to the table and picks his phone up.
"Sure, but walk and talk Ben." Alex then says as he opens the door and waits for his friend to start walking and smiles as he follows him through the door.
"Wow!" Carter says after his boyfriend ends the kiss by gently pushing in back a little and he can't help but look at him lovingly.
"You're beautiful you know that." Wesley then says as he looks at his boyfriend and not for the first time, starts to lose himself in his beautiful violet eyes.
"And you're a prick for giving me a boner in the middle of the playground you moron." Carter responds with a grin, before leaning back in and kissing his boyfriend, who can't help but moan into his mouth, until his phone ringing interrupts them both.
"Aww damn it." Carter says after his boyfriend breaks their kiss and pulls his phone out, although his smile drops a little as he sees Jarred walking across the other side of the playground with a few others and can see them giving him a dirty look and laughing.
"You're sexy when you sulk." Wesley teases as he looks at the disappointed look on his boyfriends face, although as he actually looks at him closer, he can see he was a little upset.
"Yeah whatever, so are you going to answer that or what?" Carter states in a slightly harsh tone as he moves off his boyfriend and looks down at the still ringing phone.
"Oh right yeah." Wesley responds as he gives his boyfriend a curious look, before looking down at his phone to see who is calling. "Ben you alright?" He then asks in a concerned tone, although he didn't think his friend would be ringing if he wasn't feeling better he was still worried.
"Yeah, well I mean I'm not feeling on top of the world or anything, but Alex's idea worked and I feel a lot better." Ben responds honestly, although he couldn't help but be a little distracted by his friends house as he follows him towards the bathroom.
"So it really was just needing to vent and you aren't depressed or anything like that?" Wesley then asks in a curious tone, he wanted to be really happy and excited that his friend was going to be alright, but if these past few months has taught him anything, it was to not get his hopes up too much for something good to happen.
"Honestly I though hitting something and just getting really angry was a stupid idea, but it worked Wesley and it just felt so good to get it out of my system." Ben answers honestly before seeing the look on his friends face as they stop at the bottom of the stairs and quickly mouths that he is sorry for calling his idea stupid and smiles as his friend grins and starts to walk up the stairs.
"Well I thought it was a long shot, but you're really shit at dealing with your emotions Ben and I guess it was just like when you need to cry and you bottled it up instead, so maybe you should buy yourself a punching bag or something like that, so that you can avoid this happening again." Wesley then suggests as he watches his boyfriend stand up and gives him a curious look.
"We need to start walking to class Wesley, we can't be late after what happened earlier." Carter states as he looks down at his boyfriend and decides to hold his hand out and smiles when his boyfriend takes it, he was annoyed at himself for letting the bullies get to him like that, especially since they were so far away and he was safe with his boyfriend, but he wasn't going to let it bother him any more than he had already.
"Ben I can talk for another minute, but after earlier we can't risk being late for our next class, well if you weren't alright we would come get you, but you know what I mean." Wesley then tells his friend, although he can't help but blush when he sees his boyfriend shaking his head and smirking and knows he made a bit of a mess of it, although at the same time he was relieved to see that his boyfriend seemed okay now and wondered if he was just being paranoid about thinking he was upset a few minutes earlier.
"Yeah sure, I have to get in the shower in a second any way, I kind of forgot to change out of my uniform and well I stink right now." Ben responds and although his friend obviously made a mess of explaining that he couldn't talk for long, he knew that they had gotten into trouble for him and he knew they would do it again if he needed them to and he loved them both for it.
"A shower, aren't you still at Alex's?" Wesley then asks in a surprised tone, it was a bit weird that his friend was having a shower around another boys house that he barely knew, even if he had helped him out.
"Yeah it's a bit weird, but my uniform is soaked with sweat and I stink Wesley, so it's not like I can just walk home like it and it's not like Alex is going to stand in the room and stare at me while I shower." Ben responds with a grin, which widens when he sees Alex turn and stop at a door and give him a mock disappointed look.
"I guess so, but you should give Matt a call Ben, he knows that something happened and I think Mitch will tell him everything I told him and well now that you're feeling better, you really need to call him and make sure that he isn't upset." Wesley then suggests as he walks hand in hand with his boyfriend towards the school.
"I will after I take a shower, I just feel well horrible and sticky, so I want to just, well shit do you think, shit no I will call him after I have a shower I promise, I just need to think about what I want to say." Ben answers nervously, he had tried not to think about his boyfriend and what he has probably put him through by acting like he has done this past week and now that he was, he just felt himself panicking a little bit.
"You okay Ben?" Alex quickly asks, after hearing and seeing just how worried his friend was about talking to his boyfriend and wondered if he should cuddle him or something, but he wasn't quite sure if that would help or just be weird.
"Yeah er... shit look thanks for everything Alex, but can I just have that shower now please." Ben responds with a weak smile, he just needed to relax and not answer any more question right now.
"Sure it's just here and I will find you some clothes to wear home." Alex says before opening the bathroom door and then walking across the landing to his bedroom. "Just give me a shout when you're done and I will come and give you your clothes and a towel." He then states before walking into his room.
"Ben are you sure you're alright, because we can come and get you if you aren't." Wesley asks as he and his boyfriend walk into the school and slowly head towards their next class.
"I just need to get a shower and relax a little Wesley, then as soon as I'm done I will phone Matt, but I really should go and so should you two because I don't want you both getting into any more trouble for me." Ben responds as he shuts the bathroom door and begins to look around the room and can't help but be impressed and despite not knowing what to expect, he thought it was nice.
"Bye Ben and don't worry about us, you would do the same for us." Wesley responds with a grin as his boyfriend gives him a quick peck on the check and can't help but give his a curious look.
"Okay bye Wesley." Ben responds as he hangs up and starts to strip as he moves closer to the shower.
"What was that for?" Wesley asks with a grin after putting his phone away and although he wasn't complaining, he was curious.
"Because I love you and you're my boyfriend." Carter responds before pulling on his boyfriends hand and starts to lead him to their classroom again.
"I love you too Dumpling." Wesley then responds and tries to keep a straight face, but as soon as his boyfriend stops and looks at him, he can't help but laugh at his expression.
"Fucking dumpling, you're such a moron Wesley." Carter then states as he shakes his head and starts to move forward again.
"I'm your moron though and I will find a name that you like one day." Wesley retorts with a smile and can't help but give his boyfriend a few glances and can tell that he enjoys this little game more than he pretends not to.
"Good luck with that." Carter then says as they stop outside of their next class and then walk in.
"Stop Tobias, just give me a second." Matt says as he struggles to keep up with his brothers energy and knows that he is starting to struggle.
"Want to go see Mitch for a bit?" Tobias decides to ask, he could tell his brother needed a rest and also felt a bit guilty for ignoring his big brother while they played with each other and he just floated on his back near the side.
"Yeah, but can you help me please." Matt responds as he starts to struggle to even tread water and knows that he should have said something a few minutes earlier.
"Okay, just hold on to me." Tobias says as he gives his brother a smile and when he feels him holding on to his arm and side he starts to swim over to his big brother.
"You feeling alright boys?" Mitch asks as he rights himself after hearing them getting closer to him and he could see that Matt was holding on to Tobias's side.
"I'm really tired Mitch, can you lift me on the side please?" Matt asks as he just about manages to paddle to the older boy, who quickly puts his arms around him to keep him above water.
"Sure thing little guy." Mitch responds before lifting him out of the water and on to the side. "How about you Tobias, you okay or are you getting tired as well?" He then asks as he turns to his brother, who he can see looks just fine and is smiling happily.
"No me good Mitch, but I want a break and well what about you, are you alright?" Tobias then asks in response and Mitch can't help but be a little surprised by the question, he wasn't expecting it and couldn't help but smile.
"Yeah I'm doing okay, well apart from Ben, but until we hear from him or Wesley I'm going to just try to relax and think about how I'm going to kick his arse when he gets back here for running away from school." Mitch responds with a grin, he was actually really worried for his little brother, but he didn't want either boy to know just how much and decided to try and act like he wasn't too concerned.
"Hey if anyone is going to kiss his arse, it's going to be me Mitch." Matt quickly states with a big grin, although he can't help but wonder why his brother and the older boy were now giving him a strange look.
"You want to kiss him bum?" Tobias then asks in a confused tone and can't think of any reason someone would want to kiss a bum.
"Huh?" Matt responds in an equally confused tone, he had no idea where his brother got that from.
"You said you were going to kiss his bum." Tobias responds with the same confused look, he was sure he heard his brother right and the fact his big brother was grinning made him even more sure of what his brother had said.
"No I didn't, I said kick not kiss." Matt says defensively before turning to the older boy. "Mitch tell him I said kick." He then states, knowing that his brother is obviously trying to play a trick on him, he knew the older boy was the only one who could prove him wrong.
"Sorry Matt, but you definitely said kiss and as funny as it is and it is funny Matt, let's move on to something that doesn't involve you and my brother touching each other." Mitch responds with a grin, he would have loved to tease the younger boy and really distract them all from his little brother, but he really didn't want the distraction to be how the two boys touched each other.
"Kissing bums is gross though." Tobias then says, he wasn't quite ready to let this go yet and wanted to understand why someone would kiss a place where their poo came out.
"Well it has to be clean and..." Matt then begins to try and explain, but is quickly cut off.
"Okay let's not talk about this right now boys and let's..." Mitch then begins to say before the sound of someone's phone ringing interrupts him and he can't help but grin. "Seriously, how long until you can change that Matt?" He then asks with a grin as he watches the young boy blush.
"Not soon enough Mitch." Matt responds as he gets up and limps over to the table, he could just kill his boyfriend for making him have this ringtone, but he had to admit it was a great forfeit and he knew when he won their next bet, he would have to come up with something great to beat it.
"Who is it?" Tobias then asks as he paddles over to the side of the pool and watches as his brothers face lights up and he quickly gets his answer.
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